Man up and cry...

[eddy_]

With the recent passing of International Men’s Day and with the results of recent research showing a 15 year high in male suicides in the UK (www.thecalmzone.net/2014/10/male-suicides-in-england-and-wales-hit-15-year-high), I started thinking about the paradox that is masculinity.

Both masculinity and femininity in their own rights are very slowly

Comments

*like*

[sarah_orange]

indeed - I keep saying to people generally that blindly solidering on with stuff that is physically and mentally destroying you for the sake of others or appearance is just silly. eventually you'll break and be of far less help to the people you were trying to support than if you'd just been less hard on yourself in the first place.

my new thing I say to people is 'be kind to yourself'

:)

Re: *like*

[attack_monkey]

Totally. If I'd have been your typical manly man and kept it all bottled up when I was ill, I'd be locked in a padded cell, rocking backwards and forwards and muttering "cluck, cluck, gibber, gibber, my old man's a mushroom" over and over to myself.

I think the age of social media doesn't help either. People feel pressured to only show the good stuff, either because they want to appear to be awesome, or they don't want to appear negative. And a lot of the time, people that do talk about their issues on social media, are just posting vague updates to the wind, they don't really get much back, other than a parade of "Hug" type comments.

I just wish more people (men and women) would just sit down with someone and TALK about their problems. It really does help.

[etoile_violet]

Init tho.

Seriously though, I agree. One thing we can really do with getting rid of is applying the terms 'masculine' and 'feminine' to behaviours, since there are more differences amongst the individual genders than there are between them. And getting rid of the idea that 'feminine' traits are inferior would be excellent as well - I mean, if being seen as female wasn't considered an insult, it wouldn't be such an issue if a man did something that was classed as feminine.

I also agree that asking for help is a sign of strength, more so than the opposite.

[doglets]

Interesting read.

I have a sense that my partner that died just hadn't got the words to express his anxiety nor permission from the society he grew up in to be vulnerable. So it turned into anger, which he directed at himself with tragic consequences.

[bikerfaerie]

Very well put. I'm glad I know brave and insightful people like you, and not only those who miss your point completely, instead turning the strength of character into selfishness and bullying. I hope the changes continue in the right direction, without getting washed out as things too often do these days, and we get more like you :)

[november_girl]

Nicely put.

[nyarbaggytep]

Agreed!