(no subject)
Apropos of nothing, here's a very short Harry Potter meta-ficlet... fic... thing. I got bored at work.
By the time Harry and Ron slouched down to breakfast on a particularly cold, rainy morning, the mail had already arrived, Hermione had finished eating and pushed her plate aside, and Hedwig was helping herself to the crumbs.
“Shove off,” Ron mumbled, flapping his hand in front of the owl. She gave him a disdainful look and flew off as the two boys sat down. Ron flopped his head into his arms and groaned. “Wish I could sleep all day and rmblisamphf.”
Harry and Hermione exchanged a grin, and Hermione leaned over the table. “What was that, Ron?”
“Umph.”
“Who’s your letter from?” Harry asked, nodding towards the paper Hermione held.
“Mum.” Her eyes lit up. “The last book in my favorite series is coming out this summer. I’ve been reading them since… well, before I came here.” She rested her chin on her hand. “It’ll be weird, though, once I read it. No more to look forward to, and all that.”
“Are you talking about the Jo Murray series? With that girl who-”
“Yes! Have you read them, too?”
“Nope, never did.”
Ron raised his head. “Are those the books about the Muggle girl who has to save the world or something?”
“Yeah, those are the ones. I didn’t know wizards read them.”
Ron looked around and lowered his voice. “Well, we don’t exactly. A lot of people want to ban them because they’re about heroic Muggles.”
“Well, of all the-” Hermione rolled her eyes. “Honestly.”
“Dad used to read them to us,” Ron continued. “I haven’t read the last few, though.”
“How can you resist? Don’t you want to know what happens?”
“Well, I know what’s going to happen. Jo will save the day.”
“Yes, but in-between?” Hermione insisted. “Don’t you want to know what happens to the fairies on the island? Or whether the doctor escapes? Or if David ever asks Portia to the school dance?”
Harry laughed.
“What?” said Hermione.
“Nothing, it’s just…” Harry suddenly seemed very intent on buttering his toast.
“Just what?” said Ron.
“Are these children’s books?”
Ron said “Yes” and Hermione said “No,” then both looked at each other as if the other were crazy.
“And,” Harry went on, “it’s like Ron said. All those books end the same way. The good guys win.” His face darkened. “Not like real life, I guess.”
“Right, mate,” said Ron quickly. “The good guys win. The fairies are all okay, the doctor escapes-actually, I don’t even know who the doctor is, since I didn’t read that far, but whoever he is, I’m sure he escapes-and David has to ask Portia to the dance. He’s liked her all this time.”
Hermione flushed and looked pleased, but she said, “You don’t think David likes Jo?”
“Ha!” Ron snorted.
“Well, she is the heroine of the book,” Hermione pressed. “Wouldn’t it make more sense?”
“If she’s the heroine, she’s too busy anyway,” said Harry dryly. “So how many of these books are there?”
“Six,” said Hermione. Then she cast a quick glance at her letter. “Seven, actually. In July there will be seven.”
By the time Harry and Ron slouched down to breakfast on a particularly cold, rainy morning, the mail had already arrived, Hermione had finished eating and pushed her plate aside, and Hedwig was helping herself to the crumbs.
“Shove off,” Ron mumbled, flapping his hand in front of the owl. She gave him a disdainful look and flew off as the two boys sat down. Ron flopped his head into his arms and groaned. “Wish I could sleep all day and rmblisamphf.”
Harry and Hermione exchanged a grin, and Hermione leaned over the table. “What was that, Ron?”
“Umph.”
“Who’s your letter from?” Harry asked, nodding towards the paper Hermione held.
“Mum.” Her eyes lit up. “The last book in my favorite series is coming out this summer. I’ve been reading them since… well, before I came here.” She rested her chin on her hand. “It’ll be weird, though, once I read it. No more to look forward to, and all that.”
“Are you talking about the Jo Murray series? With that girl who-”
“Yes! Have you read them, too?”
“Nope, never did.”
Ron raised his head. “Are those the books about the Muggle girl who has to save the world or something?”
“Yeah, those are the ones. I didn’t know wizards read them.”
Ron looked around and lowered his voice. “Well, we don’t exactly. A lot of people want to ban them because they’re about heroic Muggles.”
“Well, of all the-” Hermione rolled her eyes. “Honestly.”
“Dad used to read them to us,” Ron continued. “I haven’t read the last few, though.”
“How can you resist? Don’t you want to know what happens?”
“Well, I know what’s going to happen. Jo will save the day.”
“Yes, but in-between?” Hermione insisted. “Don’t you want to know what happens to the fairies on the island? Or whether the doctor escapes? Or if David ever asks Portia to the school dance?”
Harry laughed.
“What?” said Hermione.
“Nothing, it’s just…” Harry suddenly seemed very intent on buttering his toast.
“Just what?” said Ron.
“Are these children’s books?”
Ron said “Yes” and Hermione said “No,” then both looked at each other as if the other were crazy.
“And,” Harry went on, “it’s like Ron said. All those books end the same way. The good guys win.” His face darkened. “Not like real life, I guess.”
“Right, mate,” said Ron quickly. “The good guys win. The fairies are all okay, the doctor escapes-actually, I don’t even know who the doctor is, since I didn’t read that far, but whoever he is, I’m sure he escapes-and David has to ask Portia to the dance. He’s liked her all this time.”
Hermione flushed and looked pleased, but she said, “You don’t think David likes Jo?”
“Ha!” Ron snorted.
“Well, she is the heroine of the book,” Hermione pressed. “Wouldn’t it make more sense?”
“If she’s the heroine, she’s too busy anyway,” said Harry dryly. “So how many of these books are there?”
“Six,” said Hermione. Then she cast a quick glance at her letter. “Seven, actually. In July there will be seven.”