( Read more... )

Why do things get so goddamn shitty just as soon as they started kicking ass? I'm only human, goddamnit. I can't be strong all the time, I can't do this all the time. I'm so tired.

so I guess a lot more people read this shit than I thought
fuck you guys

I LIKE ART AGAIN so long as Ben keeps on doling out his kickass inspirational steps. BABY STEPS BABY STEPS BABY STEPS

It feels like I'm seeing myself for the first time. More often with each passing moment, I find myself stepping outside of...myself, and I'm just looking at myself in this strange disconnected way. When I laugh, sometimes I'm a bit startled at the voice that comes out, or when I say something, I'm confused as to where it came from. What the fuck is ( Read more... )

to do to do to do to do (once Thanksgiving break is over ( Read more... )

more on this later, maybe. Maybe it's not a problem.

I went down to San Diego this weekend to visit some friends. God, what a fucking strange weekend.

POSSIBLY GOING CRAZY NO BIG DEAL

   We watched three movies last night, and I was drunk on vodka and champagne most of the night. I walked outside by myself during points in our marathon and sat in the middle of the road, this perfect, wide, flat suburban road, and I just sat outside smoking cigarettes by myself. Sometimes I would lie down and stare at this translucent gray that ( Read more... )

thoughts that I need to get down

-fucking eating healthier than I've been eating in such a long time, gonna try to go at least 75% raw by the end of this year
-art crises, I hate the art school at USC
-can't graduate on time, summer classes, probably going to be in LA most of summer
-nausea all the time, what's going on???
-sat next to a girl who was ( Read more... )