Thorn Lily Chapter 16 Part 2
Bringing this a little closer to Chapter 18 :D I'll be flying off on Friday to Laos for 12 days and I won't be able to update there ): Churning out as much as I can before I do!
"What? Huh? Jung Yunho! Stop it!"
"What... do you really hate this? How can you reject me like this? Come here, let's continue... does it hurt? No matter, this won't stop us..."
"Ya! Do you want to kill me? Or do you want to land me in the hospital again?"
He pinned me down stubbornly, and holding back for even a second longer seemed to pain him. But this is wrong! Aigoo! He pressed down upon me and whispered those sweet-nothings into my ears...
"Jaejoong ah! You're mine! You're my flesh and my blood... did it become like this because I 'ate' you so many times..."
"...Hey! Seriously... What's wrong with you..."
"Just like 10 years ago... it's exactly the same now, nothing's changed... somehow... just..."
I placed a finger to his lips, his voice was starting to blur.
...Yes, Yunho, I know what you're trying to tell me...
"You didn't want to get married..."
Jung Yunho belongs to me and only me, that's the truth! But he's a married man, and that's also a truth! If I thought of it that way, maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she walked in on us. I imagined her holding her swollen belly and glaring at Yunho with eyes full of hatred and contempt. There's no tragedy more perfect than that! I cradled his head in my arms, my mood lifted. My cute little Yunho ah...
"Who asked you to abandon me... and ran off to the church with Suh-hee?"
He remained silent and puffed out his cheeks like a little child. Speechless, eh? I tried to seduce him with my sweet and evil voice...
"My Yunho ah... who do you love?"
"... Jaejoong... Jaejoong..."
"I see... keke... You're such a good man, my Yunho..."
I buried my face in his sholders, feeling my tears trickle down finally. I'm sorry! I did all those evil things so that I could have all your love to myself, but I didn't know how tall the cliff was upon which we stood, nor did I know how far the fall was behind us. All I could do was live this way, loving and hating... isn't that right? I cry and I sin, all because of you. And I could only make amends with my tears.
He was right, this was entirely my burden to bear! I swallowed the bitter feeling and held him tight. She probably won't appear now, right? I mean, this isn't a soap opera! I hugged my Yunho at ease. He's crying too, tasting the bitterness of our love. What if the script we're acting along with turns out to be a suicide tragedy? If she was left alone in this world, it would been me who won right?
Ah... life is so unpredictable after all! Women are even worse, those despicable creatures! To think that she'd end up with my Yunho and even carry his child; what does she want from us? I didn't give up even then, pining for him day and night - I'm the most well-behaved after all!
"Ah, today's the pre-natal check up? I thought it was Sunday?"
She came back about an hour after Yunho and I washed up. Now she's sitting on the sofa next to Yunho, flipping the television channels. She seemed out of breath - the weather was blazingly hot and she went out with that huge burden in her belly. Such a lively woman! When she told Yunho where she went, he immediately sat close to her nervously. Apparently he'd forgotten all about the check up. Watching them, I felt my heart strings tighten.
"Ah... what did the doctor say?"
"Mm, the child's fine! And energetic too!"
Ah... Yunho's completely ensnared, this Jung Yunho who's caressing her belly and being all concerned about the baby. Just a moment ago he was still my Yunho, crying like a child in my lap - it's so confusing! My mood swung all the way down to rock-bottom in a matter of seconds.
Watching Suh-hee smile and touch Yunho's face, I felt like throwing up all of a sudden. I clapped a hand to my mouth and dashed to the toilet, leaving both of them staring at me in shock. I didn't even care what they thought about me, vomiting everything I ate at the hotel into the toilet bowl. Bread, juice... Suddenly a pair of slender hands touched my shoulders. It's not him, it's her! I felt so dizzy...
Yunho's just standing behind me, doing nothing at all! I lost all my strength, sitting there in a whirl of confusion and dry-heaving. I hate this house! I hate her! Did you hear that, Jung Yunho!?
In the end she was the one who supported me back to the living room. That jerk!
"If Jaejoong can't take bread, how about rice...?"
"Don't trouble yourself over it!"
"If you're still nauseous, why not go to the hospital? I can accompany you tomorrow..."
"I mean it! Don't trouble yourself!"
She left the living room awkwardly, but Yunho remained silent as ever. Yell at me! Call my name! Just do something! Why does he look so weak? Even I'm starting to look down on him! I dashed up to the second floor and he didn't even bother chasing after me. Oh! Right! He can't come up with me!
I thought of how I wanted to castrate myself back then. This useless thing! What I want is a womb! Why must fate be so cruel? I started looking for a tie in the room, but there's nowhere for me to hang it on the ceiling. Just then I noticed the wall lights and tried hooking the tie on it. Mm! It's sturdy! I tied it into a secure loop and fitted it around my neck, kicking the chair away from beneath my feet. Soon, I'll reach that paradise... a paradise where there's no more sadness...
You... just like how much you love me... you long to be a father as well, right?
"What? Huh? Jung Yunho! Stop it!"
"What... do you really hate this? How can you reject me like this? Come here, let's continue... does it hurt? No matter, this won't stop us..."
"Ya! Do you want to kill me? Or do you want to land me in the hospital again?"
He pinned me down stubbornly, and holding back for even a second longer seemed to pain him. But this is wrong! Aigoo! He pressed down upon me and whispered those sweet-nothings into my ears...
"Jaejoong ah! You're mine! You're my flesh and my blood... did it become like this because I 'ate' you so many times..."
"...Hey! Seriously... What's wrong with you..."
"Just like 10 years ago... it's exactly the same now, nothing's changed... somehow... just..."
I placed a finger to his lips, his voice was starting to blur.
...Yes, Yunho, I know what you're trying to tell me...
"You didn't want to get married..."
Jung Yunho belongs to me and only me, that's the truth! But he's a married man, and that's also a truth! If I thought of it that way, maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she walked in on us. I imagined her holding her swollen belly and glaring at Yunho with eyes full of hatred and contempt. There's no tragedy more perfect than that! I cradled his head in my arms, my mood lifted. My cute little Yunho ah...
"Who asked you to abandon me... and ran off to the church with Suh-hee?"
He remained silent and puffed out his cheeks like a little child. Speechless, eh? I tried to seduce him with my sweet and evil voice...
"My Yunho ah... who do you love?"
"... Jaejoong... Jaejoong..."
"I see... keke... You're such a good man, my Yunho..."
I buried my face in his sholders, feeling my tears trickle down finally. I'm sorry! I did all those evil things so that I could have all your love to myself, but I didn't know how tall the cliff was upon which we stood, nor did I know how far the fall was behind us. All I could do was live this way, loving and hating... isn't that right? I cry and I sin, all because of you. And I could only make amends with my tears.
He was right, this was entirely my burden to bear! I swallowed the bitter feeling and held him tight. She probably won't appear now, right? I mean, this isn't a soap opera! I hugged my Yunho at ease. He's crying too, tasting the bitterness of our love. What if the script we're acting along with turns out to be a suicide tragedy? If she was left alone in this world, it would been me who won right?
Ah... life is so unpredictable after all! Women are even worse, those despicable creatures! To think that she'd end up with my Yunho and even carry his child; what does she want from us? I didn't give up even then, pining for him day and night - I'm the most well-behaved after all!
"Ah, today's the pre-natal check up? I thought it was Sunday?"
She came back about an hour after Yunho and I washed up. Now she's sitting on the sofa next to Yunho, flipping the television channels. She seemed out of breath - the weather was blazingly hot and she went out with that huge burden in her belly. Such a lively woman! When she told Yunho where she went, he immediately sat close to her nervously. Apparently he'd forgotten all about the check up. Watching them, I felt my heart strings tighten.
"Ah... what did the doctor say?"
"Mm, the child's fine! And energetic too!"
Ah... Yunho's completely ensnared, this Jung Yunho who's caressing her belly and being all concerned about the baby. Just a moment ago he was still my Yunho, crying like a child in my lap - it's so confusing! My mood swung all the way down to rock-bottom in a matter of seconds.
Watching Suh-hee smile and touch Yunho's face, I felt like throwing up all of a sudden. I clapped a hand to my mouth and dashed to the toilet, leaving both of them staring at me in shock. I didn't even care what they thought about me, vomiting everything I ate at the hotel into the toilet bowl. Bread, juice... Suddenly a pair of slender hands touched my shoulders. It's not him, it's her! I felt so dizzy...
Yunho's just standing behind me, doing nothing at all! I lost all my strength, sitting there in a whirl of confusion and dry-heaving. I hate this house! I hate her! Did you hear that, Jung Yunho!?
In the end she was the one who supported me back to the living room. That jerk!
"If Jaejoong can't take bread, how about rice...?"
"Don't trouble yourself over it!"
"If you're still nauseous, why not go to the hospital? I can accompany you tomorrow..."
"I mean it! Don't trouble yourself!"
She left the living room awkwardly, but Yunho remained silent as ever. Yell at me! Call my name! Just do something! Why does he look so weak? Even I'm starting to look down on him! I dashed up to the second floor and he didn't even bother chasing after me. Oh! Right! He can't come up with me!
I thought of how I wanted to castrate myself back then. This useless thing! What I want is a womb! Why must fate be so cruel? I started looking for a tie in the room, but there's nowhere for me to hang it on the ceiling. Just then I noticed the wall lights and tried hooking the tie on it. Mm! It's sturdy! I tied it into a secure loop and fitted it around my neck, kicking the chair away from beneath my feet. Soon, I'll reach that paradise... a paradise where there's no more sadness...
You... just like how much you love me... you long to be a father as well, right?