Personally, I think Bastet fits best. I know you said you dislike cats, but in her older incarnations she was a lion-goddess, at times associated with the sun and at times with the moon, sometimes a war-goddess and sometimes a protector. That line between opposites was really what caught my attention in you post: independent and indecisive, sensitive and vengeful, introverted and extroverted, leader and follower - etc. Unlike many of the other gods and goddesses, Bastet doesn't limit herself to one realm or one facet of human experience, and it seems to me that you don't, either.
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They seem to fit the different sides to your personality quite well :D
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