The Vacation
A one shot in ChangMin's POV
Pairing(s): SuMin, JaeHo and slight YooMin
Summary: A vacation gone down the drain, or...?
My friends and I were going on a vacation, because it's really hard being the number one boy band in Asia.
We took the buss to a small town and met the mayor.
He was really small and excuse me for saying so, but he was also VERY fat.
He took us to the cabin our manager had rented for us, it wasn't small though, it was HUGE.
He told us about the rules and then he left us to settle in.
“What a dump,” YooChun complained.
“Hyung, relax, it's only for two weeks,” JaeJoong reassured.
“TWO WEEKS!?! I can't live that long!” YunHo shouted.
“Why?” I asked.
“Emm.... No TV you dimwit,” he answered.
“Hey guys! Look what I found!” JunSu shouted from the living room.
“What is that?” YooChun exclaimed.
“Can't you see? It's a TV you idiot,” YunHo smiled.
And guess what happened next, yes you're right; they started fighting over what to watch.
JunSu wanted to watch football, YunHo wanted to look at the music channels and YooChun wanted to see the reality show about the Super Juniors.
JaeJoong and I started to unpack our stuff.
“Hey ChangMin, what do you say to go on a hike in the mountains tomorrow?” JaeJoong asked.
“Just the two of us?” I asked.
“No, all of us,” JaeJoong smiled.
“Do you think we'd manage to lour them with us?” I asked.
“We won't know until we've tried,” he smiled.
Luckily JunSu found a bedroom with a TV in, so he stayed there the rest of that day.
While JaeJoong and I made supper, YooChun and YunHo played a game on playstation3.
When we finally finished eating, me and JaeJoong managed to make all of the guys promise to go on the hike with us.
“I'm tired,” YooChun said after a while.
“Me too,” YunHo smiled.
“There is only one problem,” JunSu said and looked very serious.
“What then?” I asked.
“There is only three bedrooms,” JunSu answered and looked even more serious.
“There is only two double and one single room in this cabin,” he continued.
“What do we do then?” YooChun said startled.
“Two and two of us have to share room,” I said.
“I will divide us into groups,” YunHo commanded.
“NO WAY! I found the rooms and therefore I shall choose who I shall share room with and what room I and the one I choose shall have,” JunSu growled.
“Okay okay, who do you choose and what room,” YunHo answered irritated.
“The room with the TV and ChangMin,” JunSu replied.
“Why ChangMin?” YooChun asked.
“'Because he doesn't snore or care about what I watch on TV, AND he falls asleep quickly,” JunSu answered.
“Then me and JaeJoong will take the other double room,” YunHo said.
“Why?” YooChun protested.
“'Cause he doesn't fart at night, and I'm the leader,” YunHo said strict.
“The double rooms, they don't by any chance have double beds do they?” I asked.
“Duh! If there isn't a double bed, it isn't a double room you dimwit,” JunSu laughed at me.
When we went to bed, I found an extra quilt and put it in the middle of the bed so JunSu and I wouldn't get too close when we fell asleep.
Of course JunSu had to watch football; I didn't get to go to sleep until he went to sleep himself.
I turned off the TV and got into bed again, suddenly JunSu turned around and put his hand on my waist.
I got shocked and removed the hand and of course JunSu had to wake up, he looked weird at
me and said:
“Sorry about that, I think?...”
I figured that he must have been very tired when he said that, 'cause it didn't sound like he was present at all.
Without thinking more of it I tried to sleep, but again came JunSu's hand around my waist.
Why did he keep on doing that, I woke JunSu and told him to keep his hands on his side of the bed, but he just looked stupidly at me and said:
“What are you talking about? I'm a guy, why would I grab hold of your waist?”
“Never mind,” I answered and went back to sleep, but about 10 min. later JunSu's hand was placed at my waist yet again.
There was no way I was going to wake him up again, so I just ignored it and went to sleep.
The next day when I woke up, I found myself holding JunSu close to me, just like a hug where you squeeze the air out of each other.
I got even more shocked when JunSu opened his eyes, we both jumped out of the bed.
“WHAT THE HECK!?!” JunSu shouted.
“That's what I was supposed to say,” I replied.
“Anyway, you're a sneaky bitch,” he laughed, I have to admit that I got really relieved when he said that.
“Let's go and wake the others and grab something to eat,” I smiled.
We went into the other rooms, but there was nobody there.
When we got to the kitchen JaeJoong had prepared a great breakfast, he had even made lunch for our hike.
“Sit down and eat so we can go already,” YunHo nagged.
“I'm done packing the stuff we need,” YooChun said when he came in the door.
“Got everything from the list?” JaeJoong asked suspiciously.
“I'm not dumb okay,” YooChun replied angry.
“Stop fighting,” I smiled.
We put our cloths on and started walking, it was autumn BTW.
The weather was quite nice, but it started to rain after a while so we had to find shelter.
We got to a cliff where we had to walk slowly to get past, JaeJoong walked first.
And after him came YunHo, then JunSu, YooChun and me, but of course YooChun had to slip and almost fall off.
If I hadn't been behind him, we wouldn't just have lost him, but also parts of our stuff.
“Eh, YunHo,” YooChun said frightened.
“Mhm?” YunHo replied.
“I lost the compass and the map,” YooChun continued.
“WHAT!?! HOW!?!” YunHo shouted.
“I had them in my hand when I slipped.”
We could see the tears rolling down YooChun's face when he said it.
“You, you, you IDIOT!” YunHo jawed on him.
“Stop it YunHo, can't you see that he's crying,” JaeJoong jawed back at YunHo.
“Let's just go to that hut over there,” I said calmly and pointed at a little red hut I could see in the forest.
We started walking towards it, poor YooChun was still crying so I started to console him.
“It's okay, we'll manage without it,” I smiled.
“Thanks,” he said and smiled back.
When we came to the red hut a young woman came out the door and shouted:
“What are you doing out in the rain!?! Come inside, quickly.”
Since YunHo is our leader he thanked the lady for letting us stay there.
She cooked for us and made pretty sure we were comfortable, I thought that it was 'kina weird, but the others, especially JunSu liked the attention.
When it got dark outside, she offered us her guest room.
How could we say no, she made us feel right at home, she even sang a goodnight song for us.
And when she went out of the room, she shut the door and locked it.
“WHAT THE FUCK!?!” YunHo shouted and ran towards the door.
“It's locked,” I said cheeky.
“Let us out!” he started to yell and banged angrily at the door.
“Never, you are all mine,” the lady laughed.
” What do we do now?” YooChun said and lay down on the bed the lady had given him.
“Oh shut up,” YunHo jawed.
All night I and JunSu lied awake, planning our escape, while the others were asleep.
“Why don't we try to get out the window?” JunSu said.
Of course, I ran towards it, opened it and said;
“We could escape from here.”
“We CAN escape from here,” I smiled again.
“Er… Sorry to burst your bubble, but have you looked down yet,” JunSu laughed.
I looked down, stupid me, the hut was standing by a cliff, and the guest room was on the side of the hut that stood at the end of the cliff.
We had to think of something else, but what?
“What if we tie all the sheets and the quilts together and use them to climb down the cliff?” I asked after a while.
“That might just work,” JunSu smiled impressed.
We woke the other guys and started to tie together the sheets and quilts.
When we were done, we fasten our “rope” just to give it a name, in the sill.
“Who's first?” YooChun asked.
“I'm the leader, I should go first,” YunHo said and started to climb down.
When JaeJoong had started to climb, YooChun told me that he was afraid of heights.
“Relax, it's just around 20 meters down,” JunSu smiled and gave YooChun a pat on the back.
YooChun swallowed and looked out the window.
“I can't, it's too high,” he complained.
“Get on with it,” JunSu nagged.
“Just remember, don't look down,” I smiled.
He grabbed the “rope” and started to climb out the window and down.
“My turn,” JunSu smiled when YooChun had gotten down.
Just in case the crazy woman came back, I pushed one of the beds in front of the door.
“Are you coming?” JunSu shouted.
I hurried towards the window, I got ready to climb out, but just then I realized that I was afraid of heights too.
Suddenly I heard the crazy woman's voice say:
“What are you doing in there?”
I grabbed the “rope” and started to climb, the door flew up, 'caues I had forgotten that the door went out and not in.
“Hurry ChangMin,” they shouted .
The woman appeared in the window with a scissor and started to cut the “rope”.
“Jump ChangMin! You have to jump!” JaeJoong shouted.
“Are you mad!?! I can't!” I jawed at him.
“It's the only way!” JaeJoong continued to shout.
“I'm afraid of heights,” I said.
“Not you too,” YunHo complained.
“Just jump already, I'll catch you,” JunSu smiled, but I was too late.
The crazy woman had cut the “rope” and I fell, luckily JunSu managed to catch me.
It was actually fun, I'm a bit ashamed to say this, but I really wanted to do it again.
The woman disappeared, but we didn't really notice that.
I was too busy looking into JunSu's eyes, who just stood there holding me.
“Get back here!” the woman yelled and started to run towards us.
We or the other guys started to run, JunSu was still carrying me.
“You know that I can run, right?” I said and JunSu put me back on the ground.
We ended up running different ways, and before I knew what happened I fell and fainted.
After some time I finally woke up to realize that I was tied to a bed.
Quickly I started to look around the room, there was one more bed and JunSu was in it, tied up just like me.
JunSu turned his head and looked at me a long time before he said:
“I don't feel too good.”
“You dimwit,” I laughed.
“Of course you don't feel good, you've probably just been hit in the head by that crazy woman,” I continued.
We could hear a door opening and being shut.
“No don't! AH!!!!” YooChun's voice craved through the wall.
“What do you suppose she is doing to him?” JunSu asked.
“I don't know, but it can't be good,” I answered.
We could still hear YooChun's aching voice yelling for help, but we couldn't do anything to help him or our selves.
About an hour later everything got quiet, suddenly the door to the room where I and JunSu were, opened up.
The crazy woman stepped into the room, and all she was wearing was a tiny pair of panties.
She shut the door behind her and walked towards me.
“You've been a bad boy,” she smiled and picked up a whip from the floor, my eyes started to flare.
She sat down on me and started to open my shirt.
“What are you doing you crazy bitch!?!” JunSu started to yell.
“Shut up!” she answered and whipped him.
“Your next,” she smiled, turned back to me and started to lick my chest.
“Stop it,” I commanded her, but she just kept on licking.
“Untie me,” I said seductive, she lifted her head and looked deep into my eyes.
“Why?” she asked.
“So I can touch you. I want feel your naked body rub against mine, I want to...”
“Yes?” she asked and looked hopefully at me.
“Come closer,” I could see her face appear in front of mine.
“What are you doing ChangMin!?!” JunSu said shocked.
I kissed her, and of course she kissed me back.
It didn't take long before we started to smear, and just as I hoped the woman said:
“Let's have sex,”
It does NOT end up as you think, 'cause to have sex with me, I told her to untie me so we could cuddle like bunnies.
“I don't trust you,” she said.
“I won't try to escape,” I answered.
“I can see you,” JunSu said angry, it was obvious that he didn't like pornography.
“Do you really want to do it in front of him?” she asked.
“I don't care, he is too stupid to even know what we're doing,” I answered.
“I've got an idea,” she smiled, I looked asking at her.
“I'll only untie you if you promise to shag JunSu in front of me,” she smiled.
I swallowed, I just had to do it.
“And then we can cuddle like bunnies?” I asked.
She nodded, kissed and untied me.
I got up and walked towards JunSu, he looked awed at me and said:
“What are you doing?”
I hushed him and put my hand on his face.
I sat down on top of him and slowly started to touch his chest, JunSu had a wild look on his face.
“ChangMin, stop it. You can't do this to me,” he said scared, but yet again I hushed him.
I got ready to kiss him; I could see the crazy woman's face appear on the side of mine.
And when she got close enough, I chuck my hand at her face and she fell on the floor.
Luckily she fainted so I managed to untie JunSu and button up my shirt before we went for the others.
“That was bloody brilliant,” JunSu smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
“Ugh, don't you ever do that again,” I said strict.
“I have to admit that I got really scared when you sat on top of me, doing what you did,” JunSu laughed.
When we finally managed to find and open the door to the room YooChun was held captive we got shocked.
YooChun was tied to the bed of course, but only completely naked and crying.
“What happened?” me and JunSu asked.
“She.… She,” YooChun took a deep breath and continued:
“She raped me,” the tears started to stream down his cheeks.
We quickly started to untie him, and made sure he got all his clothes back on.
“I'll go check if she's still unconscious,” JunSu said and went off.
YooChun and I found YunHo and JaeJoong tied to the kitchen chairs in tiny girl panties, we just had to laugh.
“What happened to you guys?” YooChun laughed.
“She gave me a blow job before putting on these silly panties,” YunHo said ashamed.
“What about you JaeJoong?” I asked.
“She gave me the same treatment,” JaeJoong answered even more ashamed.
“But where is JunSu?” YunHo suddenly asked.
“I don't know,” I replied, then I remembered that he went to see if the crazy woman...
She couldn't, or could she?
We ran to the room where I and JunSu were held captive, but there was no one there.
“Ah!”
We could hear JunSu's voice coming from the bathroom, but it was locked.
We tried everything to get the door open, but nothing helped.
It got quiet, too quiet.
“We have to get in there!” I yelled.
Suddenly we could hear glass break; it had to be the bathroom window.
I panicked, I just couldn't think straight so I started to kick the door.
“You are brilliant!” JaeJoong shouted.
I looked stupidly at him, but luckily YunHo took the hint and took his super strong karate kick on the door.
It flew away, all the way over to the other end of the room.
We looked around, but the only thing we could see was that the bathtub was full of water and some hair disappearing in it.
“BATHTUB!!!” I shouted and ran towards it.
I dragged JunSu's body out of the bathtub and started to slap him on his face.
“I don't think that would help,” YooChun said.
“Why?” I asked.
“He has surely swallowed plenty of water,” JaeJoong replied.
“You have to give him mouth to mouth,” YunHo said.
“Ugh!” I said and looked at JunSu's pale face.
“What the hell, here it goes,” I said and leaned towards his mouth.
Suddenly JunSu opened his eyes and started to cough up water, he looked at me a while before he said:
“I have to tell you this before I die,”
“Don't say that, you are going to be just fine,” I assured him, he smiled for a little while and continued.
“I've always wanted to die with you guys by my side,” he started to breathe heavily.
“You're not going to die you dimwit,” I smiled and could feel the tears pushing.
“I,” his breath was starting to get weaker.
“Don't talk,” I said.
“I...” he blacked out.
“Don't leave me,” I cried, I just couldn't hold the tears back anymore.
My best friend couldn't just die like that, suddenly we could hear someone knocking at the front door.
“Who can that be?” YooChun asked.
“Don't open, it might be that crazy woman,” YunHo said.
The knocking went from calm knocking to kicking.
“We have to go,” they nagged me, but I couldn't leave JunSu.
I got on my feet and started to lift him, but he was too heavy.
“Help me,” I said to them, but YunHo had other ideas.
“We have to leave him here,” he said.
“NO!” I shouted; “He IS still alive, and he IS part of our group,”
“ChangMin has got a point YunHo, we can't just leave him,” JaeJoong agreed.
Luckily YunHo gave in and helped me carry JunSu out the back door.
It had started to snow, and we had almost nothing to wear.
Luckily I remembered that I had a GPS on my cell phone so we managed to get back to where we came from.
It was a long walk back to our cabin.
We had to take turns carrying JunSu 'cause he was very heavy.
Luckily he had started to breath, but he was very cold and at the same time very hot.
As soon as we got back to the cabin we had to take all of JunSu's clothes off, and put him to bed.
We had to put ice-cold towels on him, 'cause he was burning up.
JunSu was present, but his eyes were always closed.
We fed him and made sure that he wasn't too cold or too hot.
JunSu finally started to get better on the 4th day of our vacation, but he wasn't strong enough to do anything but moving his head a little.
I sat down on his bed and looked at him, he looked so miserable.
“JunSu?” I whispered, he opened his eyes and looked deep into mine.
A warm breeze went from my head to my toes, I blushed, I just knew I did.
“I'm hungry.”
That was his first words since he blacked out.
“I thought you'd be, so I brought you some soup,” I smiled.
“I don't want soup,” he pouted.
“What do you want then?” I replied.
“A big juicy burger,” he smiled.
“I'll see what I can do,” I said, got up and petted him on the head.
I made JaeJoong make a burger, but I told him that it was for me.
I wanted them to get surprised when JunSu came walking down the stairs, if he had gotten better.
I took the burger up to JunSu's and my room.
JunSu lied on the floor and breathed real heavy; I put the burger on the nightstand and hurried towards him.
He lied faced down, so I turned him around.
He grabbed my shirt and looked painfully at me before he said:
“Help me,”
I told him to hold on and ran down to the others.
“Is there a car here?” I asked.
“Nope, only a buss, but it doesn't get up here until 9 am tomorrow,” JaeJoong answered.
What to do now?
I couldn't stand still, I couldn't even think.
After about 20 seconds of hesitation I ran out the door and towards the mayor's house.
And of course he didn't have a phone; my cell phone was dead so I couldn't use that either.
The town didn't have any doctor, so I had to run all the way down to the city.
It was about 20 km away, so it didn't take long before I got exhausted.
But I had to keep running, I just had to.
I ran and ran, and when I finally got to the hospital I could barely walk.
I managed to find a doctor relatively fast; I told him that JunSu had problems breathing.
He drove me back up with an ambulance.
Luckily we got to JunSu just in time; the doctor put JunSu in the back of the ambulance and advised me to come back to the hospital with them.
Of course I asked why, and then he said:
“You ran about 20 km barefoot, I'll have to check your feet,”
“Oh,” I replied, how could I forget.
The next day the other guys came to visit, my feet were just fine I thanked them.
But JunSu was put in an artificial coma, he looked pretty miserable.
The doctor came in and said:
“The only chance Kim JunSu has to live, is to stay in coma, but he will die.”
“You just said..” I started, but the doctor interrupted me.
“He will only live for two maybe three days tops. Does he have any close relatives alive?”
I didn't want to startle his parents, so I said that they died in a car crash three years ago.
“Which one of you is his closest friend?” the doctor asked.
“It's Shim,” JaeJoong said and pushed me in front of the doctor.
“What do you want to do?” the doctor asked me.
I could feel the tears pushing, I swallowed.
“Just let him stay in the coma till he dies,” I said.
“You know that it would be better if you just let him go right now,” the doctor said.
“He knows that, but it's too hard for him. JunSu, Kim JunSu is Shim's best friend. He just loves him too much,” YooChun explained.
“Well, I'll leave you guys alone. Maybe Mr. ChangMin changes his mind,” the doctor said and left us.
When the night came I stayed with JunSu while the other guys went back to the cabin.
YooChun made me promise to rethink my decision till the next day.
I felt completely alone that night, it seemed like I was the only one in the whole world.
I climbed into the bed were JunSu lied and held on tight, I never wanted that night to end.
I don't know what came over me, but I kissed JunSu on his cheek and said sadly:
“Don't you ever leave me.”
I put my head on his chest and I could swear that JunSu answered:
“I won't.”
I closed my eyes and whispered:
“I'll never let you go, I'll never leave you and I'll never ever let you out of my sight ever again.”
The next day when I got up I couldn't remember where I was, but I got reminded very fast when the doctor came in.
“Have you decided?” he asked.
I took a deep breath before I said:
“It has been very hard for me, I'll give him till tonight,”
The doctor nodded and left, I held JunSu's hand and said quietly:
“I believe in you, so don't you let me down.”
I spent the rest of that day sitting by JunSu's bed, holding his hand and talking to him.
I talked about everything, about old times, when I was a kid and how scared I was.
I even sang for him, I sang “Doushite”, “Rainy Night”, “Begin”, “Forever love”, “Fly away”, “Lovin' you” and my favorite: “I Love You”.
When the evening came the other guys and I stood by JunSu's bed, we said goodbye to him as the doctor pulled the plug.
When it was done the guys wanted me to join them at the cabin, but they knew that I didn't want to leave JunSu even if he was dead.
But when the doctor told me that they wouldn't move his body until 11 am the next morning, I decided to go with the others.
When we got back to the cabin JaeJoong made a huge dinner, the other two made sure that it got cozy in the living room and found a movie we could watch.
I wanted to help, but they insisted that I'd rest.
We watched “Eagle Eye” and “Desturbia”, and after that we went to bed.
It was so quiet.
I turned on the TV and watched an American soap, it was very boring so I switched channel.
Some of the channels weren't sending anything, but all of the others were sending football.
How could I not begin to think of JunSu when I saw football?
It was his favorite sport in the whole world; I couldn't bear watching so I turned it off.
It think it was in the middle of the night, 'cause it was completely black outside.
I tossed and turned, I couldn't sleep, and unfortunately I didn't have any sleeping pills.
I got up and went to see if YooChun was awake, 'cause his room was the closest to mine.
I opened the door, but of course he was asleep.
I went to check on JaeJoong and YunHo, they were awake and talking to each other.
They didn't notice me at first, but when they saw me they got quiet.
“J-just go back to sleep ChangMin,” YunHo said.
“I can't,” I replied.
“Did you have a nightmare?” JaeJoong asked.
“I just couldn't sleep,”
“Do you want us to put a madras on the floor, so you can sleep here?” YunHo asked.
“No, its okay, I just wanted to see if I was the only one who couldn't sleep,” I said and went back to my own room.
I lied on my bed and just looked at the roof.
“What am I doing here?” I asked myself; “Why aren’t I with JunSu?” and suddenly I realized it.
I had to be with him, dead or not, I just had to.
I ran down the stairs, put on my shoes and started walking towards the city.
I kept thinking of what I should say to the doctor if I met him, and what to say to JunSu if they let me in.
I started to run, I just had to hurry, but I didn't know why and I still don't.
When I got to the hospital the doctor stood in the door smoking.
“What brings you back down here at this hour?” he asked.
I hesitated for a while before I said:
“I just have to be with him,”
“You know that he's dead, right?” he said.
“I'm not stupid, I'm just not ready to let him go just yet,” I replied.
“I understand, you may go in,” he said and opened the door; I went straight to JunSu's room and sat down on the bed.
I started to sing “Don't want to wait forever”, have you heard it? If not, you have to listen to more music.
I lay down beside him, and said:
“I think I'm in love with you, but it's probably too late for me to say that now. Hmm?”
I sighed, lay my head on his chest and said:
“Even if you're dead, I'll never let you go,” and not a second after that I fell asleep.
Early the next day I could feel someone caress my hair and say:
“I'll never let you go either,”
I opened my eyes, sat up and looked at JunSu's face.
He was smiling at me, the tears started to roll down my cheeks.
“Why are you crying?” he asked.
“I thought you were dead,” I answered and managed to smile a little.
“And leave you? No chance,” he smiled and wiped away my tears.
I got completely lost in him, I wanted to kiss him, but I wouldn't dare.
“I heard what you said last night,” he said, I swallowed.
“Y-you did?” I asked embarrassed.
“Yes, and I feel the same way about you,” he answered and leaned against me.
I swallowed; I could feel the tears starting to roll down my cheeks again.
JunSu bit his lip and looked passionate at me, it was going to happen any second now.
“I'm scared,” I confessed.
“Of what?” JunSu asked and got closer.
“It won't work,” I answered.
“You love me don't you?” JunSu asked.
“Yes,” I replied embarrassed.
“Then what's the problem?” he asked and looked deep into my eyes.
“I'm not ready,” I said and looked away.
JunSu smiled and said:
“You just come around at your own time.”
After that we hugged each other, and then he said:
“Do you know where my clothes are?” I couldn't help laughing.
“It's not funny,” he said strict.
“I'll tell the doctor to bring your clothes,” I said and went to get him.
The doctor got surprised;
“What a miracle,” he said, “What a miracle.”
We asked the doctor to call YunHo on his phone and tell him that I had gotten in an accident.
So when YunHo got the call, he and the guys hurried to the hospital.
The doctor greeted them by the front door and said:
“His state is critical, he might die.”
He led them to the room where I and JunSu sat.
“Isn't this where JunSu is?” YooChun asked.
“His body was removed earlier because of Shim ChangMin's accident,” the doctor replied and opened the door.
You should have seen their faces when they saw me and JunSu sitting on the bed.
“Y-you're alive,” they said and ran towards us.
“Group hug!” JaeJoong smiled and hugged us all.
When we were done hugging, YunHo noticed that JunSu and I were holding hands and asked:
“Why are you holding hands?” I blushed and quickly let go of JunSu's hand.
“Are you alright? I mean, were you really in an accident ChangMin?” YooChun asked.
“No he wasn't, we just wanted to lour you down here and give you a huge surprise,” JunSu answered and took hold of my hands; he looked deep into my eyes.
I felt warm and dizzy, but I also got very scared.
I don't know why, but there was just something about the way I felt that frightened me.
“You see, we've gotten 'kinda close,” I said and blushed again.
“Then I and Jaejoong have something to confess too,” YunHo said.
“I'll just leave you guys,” the doctor said and left.
“What then? You gay too?” YooChun teased.
“Actually we are,” JaeJoong said a bit embarrassed.
“WHAT THE HELL!?!” YooChun shouted.
“You know when you came into our room last night ChangMin?” YunHo said.
“Yeah?” I answered.
“Well, it was that we were talking about. Our feelings for each other that is,” JaeJoong continued.
“Oh. So you're together now, right?” JunSu asked.
“Kind of,” YunHo smiled.
“'Kind of!?!” JaeJoong exclaimed; “Last night we agreed that we were together!”
“Hehe,” YunHo laughed carefully.
“You prick,” JaeJoong said and hit YunHo on his head.
“I guess that it's my turn to confess something now,” YooChun said seriously.
“Shoot,” JunSu said.
“You see...” he started.
“Oh get to the point will you!” YunHo nagged.
“I love you ChangMin,” YooChun almost yelled out.
You can imagine how shocked we got when he said that.
“Since when?” I asked.
“Since last year,” he said and hang with his head.
“But why didn't you say anything?” JunSu asked.
“I was afraid that I would get rejected,” YooChun answered.
“You know that you're 'kinda late?” JunSu said.
“I know now, 'cause you and ChangMin are together now,” YooChun replied ashamed.
“We're not together, we've just gotten closer. But that doesn't mean that I'm gay,” I said.
“Oh,” YooChun said and smiled a little.
We had another group hug and went back to the cabin to spend the next week together, without any more adventures.
When we got back to the cabin, we sat down at the kitchen table and played cards.
“This is 'kinda boring,” YooChun said after about ten minutes.
“Then go do something else,” JunSu smiled.
“Like what?” YooChun replied.
“I don't know; play a game at the playstation3?” JunSu answered a little irritated.
YooChun went into the living room and turned on the TV, YunHo gave JaeJoong a weird look and said:
“I'm gonna go to bed early.”
“It's only 3 pm,” I said.
“I'm tired,” YunHo smiled and went upstairs.
“Me too,” JaeJoong said and followed YunHo.
“I'm pretty sure that “I'm tired” means let's go cuddle,” JunSu said and looked stupidly at me.
“I think so too,” I smiled.
We could hear YooChun laugh at something, so we went to see what it was.
Of course he was watching Super Junior's reality show; we didn't quite get what the funny thing about a card kissing game was....
We had absolutely nothing else to do so we just sat down and watched the show.
About an hour later football was supposed to start, but the reality show wasn't finished so JunSu had to go up to see it.
I figured that football was better than some stupid reality show about the Super Juniors, therefore I went with him.
We lived in the bed and watched, but it lasted only for about one hour.
We spent the rest of the evening talking; we started laughing when we heard some weird noises come from YunHo and JaeJoong's room.
They weren't that weird; we just couldn't help laughing, 'cause we knew what kind of noises they were.
At about midnight we could hear YooChun coming up the stairs and enter his room.
It got quiet, JaeJoong and YunHo must have fallen asleep, but the silence got broken by YooChun's voice saying:
“Oh baby,”
We started to laugh again, how sick could he get?
We figured that YooChun believed that we all were asleep, he would never do things like that if he knew that we were awake.
YooChun's noises just kept on going.
“I can't believe that he's still going for it,” JunSu laughed.
After a while we both got tired, but we couldn't sleep.
JunSu removed the extra quilt and moved closer to me, I got very nervous.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I'm fine,” I answered, but I lied, I wasn't okay at all.
He put his hand around me; it slowly got more and more difficult to breathe.
“Goodnight,” he said, kissed me on the cheek and fell asleep.
I leaned against him and closed my eyes, how could I be so scared and at the same time feel so safe?
The next morning when I woke up, I found myself lying alone.
I wondered if it all could have been a dream, but then JunSu came in the door, turned on the light and smiled:
“Rise and shine princess.”
I sighed and put my pillow on my face.
JunSu lay down beside me and I just had check if he was looking at me.
I moved the pillow a little and looked straight into his eyes, I blushed and pulled the pillow in front of my face again.
“Are you okay?” JunSu asked.
What is it with this guy? I thought; why has he always got to ask if I'm okay?
“Yes,” I snapped at him.
“What's wrong?” he asked.
“You!” I snapped again.
“What about me?” he said.
“Why do you always have to ask if I'm okay!?! It's bloody annoying!” I almost yelled.
“ME!?! You're the one being annoying! Of course I ask if you're okay, that’s what friends do,” JunSu snapped back.
“Me annoying? You must be kidding,” I said calmly.
“Don't you even THINK about blaming this on me!” JunSu shouted.
“I'M NOT!” I yelled.
“IS THAT SO!?!” JunSu started to get very angry now.
“Calm down,” I commanded him.
“Some friend you are, blaming me!” he said huffy and barged out the door.
“YOU ASSHOLE!” I shouted after him, but there was no reply.
When I finally got up and went down, JunSu sent me a deadly look and went upstairs.
“What's wrong with him?” YunHo asked me.
“Don't meddle in things you don't understand,” I snapped at him.
“I'm the leader. I can't have you guys fighting, we're all in this together,” YunHo reminded me.
“Just fuck off okay,” I answered cheeky and left the cabin.
I never wanted to see any of them again, especially JunSu.
I was so angry with him, but why? He hadn't done anything wrong.
“Fucking bastard,” I said to myself and started walking towards the city.
There was a warm breeze, but I felt so cold, I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks.
When I had walked for about ten minutes my cell phone called, it was JunSu.
“Jerk,” I said and put it back in my pocket, but it wouldn't stop calling.
I picked up and said:
“What do you want, you jerk?”
But it wasn't JunSu's voice, it was JaeJoong's voice answering my question.
“You have got to get back here right now,” he said scared.
“What? Why?” I asked.
“It's JunSu, he's...” I could feel my heart beating faster when JaeJoong stopped.
“What about JunSu?” I continued to ask.
“He is going to jump from the veranda,” JaeJoong said quickly.
“Hold on, I'll be there as soon as I can,” I said and hung up.
I started to run; all kinds of questions went through my head.
Why would he try to jump from the veranda? Why did we fight? Why did I hurry to get back to him when I hated him so much? Did I really hate him? Did I love him? Why can't I admit that I'm gay, why?
When I got back to the cabin, I ran up the stairs and out to the veranda.
“STOP!” I shouted as JunSu was about to jump, he turned around.
I could see the tears rolling down his cheeks.
“I thought I'd lost you,” he said.
“You'll never lose me, I love you” I smiled, but JunSu could see that I was lying.
“You're just saying that so I won't jump,” he answered and turned away.
“I really do,” I tried.
“Spare me,” he said and almost jumped, but I managed to stop him once again.
“I may not love love you, but I DO love you,” I said.
“It's not the same, I can't live without you,” he said and looked at me.
“We're still friends, and I'm sorry for snapping at you. Can you ever forgive me?” I said.
“Of course I forgive you, but the question is, will you forgive me?” he said.
“You're my best friend, why wouldn't I?” I smiled.
JunSu smiled back at me, but then he slipped and fell.
I hurried towards the veranda rail and looked down, I couldn't see him.
But then I heard him say:
“A little help please?”
I looked down and saw him holding on to the veranda floor, I grabbed his hand and with help from the others I managed to drag him back up.
I looked deep into JunSu's eyes; I really wanted to kiss him, but again the fear took hold of me.
I gave him a hug, I could feel that JunSu was disappointed, so I held on tight.
“You guys are weird,” YooChun said and left.
“We'll leave you two alone for a while,” YunHo said and pulled JaeJoong with him back into the cabin.
We had a heart to heart talk and managed to understand each other better, but I didn't tell him that I was afraid to be gay.
Instead I told him that I was afraid to love and be loved, 'cause that's technically true.
The rest of the week I spent making sure that JunSu never ever was sad, if he hurt his head I'd put ice on it and if he got a splinter I'd get it out and put a plaster on.
One day when he got ill, I stayed by his side, not because I had to, but because I wanted to.
I fed and tended him; the other guys thought that I was weird.
They said that I acted as if we were married, but I was too smart to care about what they thought.
And when the time to go back home finally came, I had managed to get JunSu healthy again.
We thanked the town's mayor for a nice stay and took the buss to the city where we took another buss back home.
It was a long trip back, so I was glad that we had a private bus.
Most of the trip JunSu was asleep, but even if it was a bit cruel I woke him up regularly to make sure he got something to eat.
Every time I woke him up he'd say:
“We back home yet?”
And I'd feed him, 'cause he didn't really want to eat.
Every time he had finished he'd put his head on my shoulder and fall asleep.
When we got back to our group house we said goodbye to each other and went back home to our own small apartments, but YunHo went home with JaeJoong.
“What do you think they are going to do?” JunSu smiled.
“I'd rather not know,” I smiled back, JunSu looked at me with a “I'm gonna get you” 'kinda look.
“You wouldn't dare,” I said and pointed my finger at him.
“Oh no?” he said, he made a crazy look on his face and came closer.
“Stay away from me,” I laughed, but that doesn't work when you're laughing.
I turned around and started to run, of course JunSu was right behind me.
We ran and ran, we even laughed.
After a while I could see my apartment door, I started to speed up.
And when I got to the door I stopped so JunSu flew passed me, it looked so funny when he turned around and ran back.
JunSu managed to stop me by the door.
He held me against the wall, grabbed hold of my hand and held it against his heart and said:
“In my heart....... There's you,”
“JunSu,” I smiled.
“You know that I love you, right?” he asked and looked passionate at me.
“Of course I know, you dimwit,” I smiled and gave him a hug.
I could feel his hands caress my body, it felt so good.
We just stood there looking at each other, but then I started to get scared again.
JunSu could feel it, I just know that he could.
“I guess I have to go now, it's quite a long way to my apartment,” JunSu said and kissed me on my forehead.
I opened my apartment door and went inside, but then I turned around grabbed JunSu's arm and pulled him against me.
“I love you too,” I said and kissed him on his lips, JunSu smiled.
“You sure took your time, bye ChangMin,” he said and when he was about to turn around and walk, I grabbed hold of his jacket and pulled him inside.
JunSu shut the door and I turned on the light, but JunSu turned it off again and started kissing me.
I opened his jacket and he slowly took it off, he smiled, I smiled, we both smiled.
When JunSu started to open my jacket I got scared again, but it felt so right, I just let him take it off.
“You okay?” he asked and looked passionate at me.
I couldn't answer, I just couldn't get a single word out of my mouth.
“We don't have to do this you know,” he said and looked a little scared himself.
“No, I want to,” I smiled.
JunSu took off his sweater and t-shirt; I could see the contour of his perfect body.
Slowly he came towards me; I swallowed and bit my lip.
We stood completely close; he placed his hands on my waist and started to lift my sweater.
And when he had removed my t-shirt he gave me a hug, I could feel his strong arms wrap around me.
We were by the way standing by the sofa, so when JunSu let go, he leaned against me.
I closed my eyes and waited, but instead of a kiss he pushed me into the sofa and ran laughing into my bedroom.
“You asshole,” I laughed, I could see JunSu's head appear from behind the bedroom door.
“Come and get me big boy,” he teased and vanished.
“You bet I will,” I answered and went into my room.
JunSu jumped me from nowhere, we fell into the bed.
We just lied there looking at each other and then I said:
“I'm still scared.”
“Don't worry, I won’t hurt you,” JunSu smiled.
“Not like that you dimwit,” I smiled and hit him softly on his head.
“The best way to not being scared anymore, is to face your fears,” he said seriously.
“Are you afraid to gay?” he continued.
“'kinda,” I answered
“Well, there's no holding back now,” he smiled, I looked unintelligible at him.
“Yeah, you just kissed me,” JunSu said and smiled his adorable smile.
He's got a point, I thought.
I AM gay, and there is nothing I can do about it, not even if I wanted to.
After about 3 minutes of just looking at each other, JunSu got up and smiled:
“Let's go to bed.”
“Why?” I asked a little scared.
“Just trust me,” he replied and shut the door.
Pairing(s): SuMin, JaeHo and slight YooMin
Summary: A vacation gone down the drain, or...?
My friends and I were going on a vacation, because it's really hard being the number one boy band in Asia.
We took the buss to a small town and met the mayor.
He was really small and excuse me for saying so, but he was also VERY fat.
He took us to the cabin our manager had rented for us, it wasn't small though, it was HUGE.
He told us about the rules and then he left us to settle in.
“What a dump,” YooChun complained.
“Hyung, relax, it's only for two weeks,” JaeJoong reassured.
“TWO WEEKS!?! I can't live that long!” YunHo shouted.
“Why?” I asked.
“Emm.... No TV you dimwit,” he answered.
“Hey guys! Look what I found!” JunSu shouted from the living room.
“What is that?” YooChun exclaimed.
“Can't you see? It's a TV you idiot,” YunHo smiled.
And guess what happened next, yes you're right; they started fighting over what to watch.
JunSu wanted to watch football, YunHo wanted to look at the music channels and YooChun wanted to see the reality show about the Super Juniors.
JaeJoong and I started to unpack our stuff.
“Hey ChangMin, what do you say to go on a hike in the mountains tomorrow?” JaeJoong asked.
“Just the two of us?” I asked.
“No, all of us,” JaeJoong smiled.
“Do you think we'd manage to lour them with us?” I asked.
“We won't know until we've tried,” he smiled.
Luckily JunSu found a bedroom with a TV in, so he stayed there the rest of that day.
While JaeJoong and I made supper, YooChun and YunHo played a game on playstation3.
When we finally finished eating, me and JaeJoong managed to make all of the guys promise to go on the hike with us.
“I'm tired,” YooChun said after a while.
“Me too,” YunHo smiled.
“There is only one problem,” JunSu said and looked very serious.
“What then?” I asked.
“There is only three bedrooms,” JunSu answered and looked even more serious.
“There is only two double and one single room in this cabin,” he continued.
“What do we do then?” YooChun said startled.
“Two and two of us have to share room,” I said.
“I will divide us into groups,” YunHo commanded.
“NO WAY! I found the rooms and therefore I shall choose who I shall share room with and what room I and the one I choose shall have,” JunSu growled.
“Okay okay, who do you choose and what room,” YunHo answered irritated.
“The room with the TV and ChangMin,” JunSu replied.
“Why ChangMin?” YooChun asked.
“'Because he doesn't snore or care about what I watch on TV, AND he falls asleep quickly,” JunSu answered.
“Then me and JaeJoong will take the other double room,” YunHo said.
“Why?” YooChun protested.
“'Cause he doesn't fart at night, and I'm the leader,” YunHo said strict.
“The double rooms, they don't by any chance have double beds do they?” I asked.
“Duh! If there isn't a double bed, it isn't a double room you dimwit,” JunSu laughed at me.
When we went to bed, I found an extra quilt and put it in the middle of the bed so JunSu and I wouldn't get too close when we fell asleep.
Of course JunSu had to watch football; I didn't get to go to sleep until he went to sleep himself.
I turned off the TV and got into bed again, suddenly JunSu turned around and put his hand on my waist.
I got shocked and removed the hand and of course JunSu had to wake up, he looked weird at
me and said:
“Sorry about that, I think?...”
I figured that he must have been very tired when he said that, 'cause it didn't sound like he was present at all.
Without thinking more of it I tried to sleep, but again came JunSu's hand around my waist.
Why did he keep on doing that, I woke JunSu and told him to keep his hands on his side of the bed, but he just looked stupidly at me and said:
“What are you talking about? I'm a guy, why would I grab hold of your waist?”
“Never mind,” I answered and went back to sleep, but about 10 min. later JunSu's hand was placed at my waist yet again.
There was no way I was going to wake him up again, so I just ignored it and went to sleep.
The next day when I woke up, I found myself holding JunSu close to me, just like a hug where you squeeze the air out of each other.
I got even more shocked when JunSu opened his eyes, we both jumped out of the bed.
“WHAT THE HECK!?!” JunSu shouted.
“That's what I was supposed to say,” I replied.
“Anyway, you're a sneaky bitch,” he laughed, I have to admit that I got really relieved when he said that.
“Let's go and wake the others and grab something to eat,” I smiled.
We went into the other rooms, but there was nobody there.
When we got to the kitchen JaeJoong had prepared a great breakfast, he had even made lunch for our hike.
“Sit down and eat so we can go already,” YunHo nagged.
“I'm done packing the stuff we need,” YooChun said when he came in the door.
“Got everything from the list?” JaeJoong asked suspiciously.
“I'm not dumb okay,” YooChun replied angry.
“Stop fighting,” I smiled.
We put our cloths on and started walking, it was autumn BTW.
The weather was quite nice, but it started to rain after a while so we had to find shelter.
We got to a cliff where we had to walk slowly to get past, JaeJoong walked first.
And after him came YunHo, then JunSu, YooChun and me, but of course YooChun had to slip and almost fall off.
If I hadn't been behind him, we wouldn't just have lost him, but also parts of our stuff.
“Eh, YunHo,” YooChun said frightened.
“Mhm?” YunHo replied.
“I lost the compass and the map,” YooChun continued.
“WHAT!?! HOW!?!” YunHo shouted.
“I had them in my hand when I slipped.”
We could see the tears rolling down YooChun's face when he said it.
“You, you, you IDIOT!” YunHo jawed on him.
“Stop it YunHo, can't you see that he's crying,” JaeJoong jawed back at YunHo.
“Let's just go to that hut over there,” I said calmly and pointed at a little red hut I could see in the forest.
We started walking towards it, poor YooChun was still crying so I started to console him.
“It's okay, we'll manage without it,” I smiled.
“Thanks,” he said and smiled back.
When we came to the red hut a young woman came out the door and shouted:
“What are you doing out in the rain!?! Come inside, quickly.”
Since YunHo is our leader he thanked the lady for letting us stay there.
She cooked for us and made pretty sure we were comfortable, I thought that it was 'kina weird, but the others, especially JunSu liked the attention.
When it got dark outside, she offered us her guest room.
How could we say no, she made us feel right at home, she even sang a goodnight song for us.
And when she went out of the room, she shut the door and locked it.
“WHAT THE FUCK!?!” YunHo shouted and ran towards the door.
“It's locked,” I said cheeky.
“Let us out!” he started to yell and banged angrily at the door.
“Never, you are all mine,” the lady laughed.
” What do we do now?” YooChun said and lay down on the bed the lady had given him.
“Oh shut up,” YunHo jawed.
All night I and JunSu lied awake, planning our escape, while the others were asleep.
“Why don't we try to get out the window?” JunSu said.
Of course, I ran towards it, opened it and said;
“We could escape from here.”
“We CAN escape from here,” I smiled again.
“Er… Sorry to burst your bubble, but have you looked down yet,” JunSu laughed.
I looked down, stupid me, the hut was standing by a cliff, and the guest room was on the side of the hut that stood at the end of the cliff.
We had to think of something else, but what?
“What if we tie all the sheets and the quilts together and use them to climb down the cliff?” I asked after a while.
“That might just work,” JunSu smiled impressed.
We woke the other guys and started to tie together the sheets and quilts.
When we were done, we fasten our “rope” just to give it a name, in the sill.
“Who's first?” YooChun asked.
“I'm the leader, I should go first,” YunHo said and started to climb down.
When JaeJoong had started to climb, YooChun told me that he was afraid of heights.
“Relax, it's just around 20 meters down,” JunSu smiled and gave YooChun a pat on the back.
YooChun swallowed and looked out the window.
“I can't, it's too high,” he complained.
“Get on with it,” JunSu nagged.
“Just remember, don't look down,” I smiled.
He grabbed the “rope” and started to climb out the window and down.
“My turn,” JunSu smiled when YooChun had gotten down.
Just in case the crazy woman came back, I pushed one of the beds in front of the door.
“Are you coming?” JunSu shouted.
I hurried towards the window, I got ready to climb out, but just then I realized that I was afraid of heights too.
Suddenly I heard the crazy woman's voice say:
“What are you doing in there?”
I grabbed the “rope” and started to climb, the door flew up, 'caues I had forgotten that the door went out and not in.
“Hurry ChangMin,” they shouted .
The woman appeared in the window with a scissor and started to cut the “rope”.
“Jump ChangMin! You have to jump!” JaeJoong shouted.
“Are you mad!?! I can't!” I jawed at him.
“It's the only way!” JaeJoong continued to shout.
“I'm afraid of heights,” I said.
“Not you too,” YunHo complained.
“Just jump already, I'll catch you,” JunSu smiled, but I was too late.
The crazy woman had cut the “rope” and I fell, luckily JunSu managed to catch me.
It was actually fun, I'm a bit ashamed to say this, but I really wanted to do it again.
The woman disappeared, but we didn't really notice that.
I was too busy looking into JunSu's eyes, who just stood there holding me.
“Get back here!” the woman yelled and started to run towards us.
We or the other guys started to run, JunSu was still carrying me.
“You know that I can run, right?” I said and JunSu put me back on the ground.
We ended up running different ways, and before I knew what happened I fell and fainted.
After some time I finally woke up to realize that I was tied to a bed.
Quickly I started to look around the room, there was one more bed and JunSu was in it, tied up just like me.
JunSu turned his head and looked at me a long time before he said:
“I don't feel too good.”
“You dimwit,” I laughed.
“Of course you don't feel good, you've probably just been hit in the head by that crazy woman,” I continued.
We could hear a door opening and being shut.
“No don't! AH!!!!” YooChun's voice craved through the wall.
“What do you suppose she is doing to him?” JunSu asked.
“I don't know, but it can't be good,” I answered.
We could still hear YooChun's aching voice yelling for help, but we couldn't do anything to help him or our selves.
About an hour later everything got quiet, suddenly the door to the room where I and JunSu were, opened up.
The crazy woman stepped into the room, and all she was wearing was a tiny pair of panties.
She shut the door behind her and walked towards me.
“You've been a bad boy,” she smiled and picked up a whip from the floor, my eyes started to flare.
She sat down on me and started to open my shirt.
“What are you doing you crazy bitch!?!” JunSu started to yell.
“Shut up!” she answered and whipped him.
“Your next,” she smiled, turned back to me and started to lick my chest.
“Stop it,” I commanded her, but she just kept on licking.
“Untie me,” I said seductive, she lifted her head and looked deep into my eyes.
“Why?” she asked.
“So I can touch you. I want feel your naked body rub against mine, I want to...”
“Yes?” she asked and looked hopefully at me.
“Come closer,” I could see her face appear in front of mine.
“What are you doing ChangMin!?!” JunSu said shocked.
I kissed her, and of course she kissed me back.
It didn't take long before we started to smear, and just as I hoped the woman said:
“Let's have sex,”
It does NOT end up as you think, 'cause to have sex with me, I told her to untie me so we could cuddle like bunnies.
“I don't trust you,” she said.
“I won't try to escape,” I answered.
“I can see you,” JunSu said angry, it was obvious that he didn't like pornography.
“Do you really want to do it in front of him?” she asked.
“I don't care, he is too stupid to even know what we're doing,” I answered.
“I've got an idea,” she smiled, I looked asking at her.
“I'll only untie you if you promise to shag JunSu in front of me,” she smiled.
I swallowed, I just had to do it.
“And then we can cuddle like bunnies?” I asked.
She nodded, kissed and untied me.
I got up and walked towards JunSu, he looked awed at me and said:
“What are you doing?”
I hushed him and put my hand on his face.
I sat down on top of him and slowly started to touch his chest, JunSu had a wild look on his face.
“ChangMin, stop it. You can't do this to me,” he said scared, but yet again I hushed him.
I got ready to kiss him; I could see the crazy woman's face appear on the side of mine.
And when she got close enough, I chuck my hand at her face and she fell on the floor.
Luckily she fainted so I managed to untie JunSu and button up my shirt before we went for the others.
“That was bloody brilliant,” JunSu smiled and gave me a kiss on the cheek.
“Ugh, don't you ever do that again,” I said strict.
“I have to admit that I got really scared when you sat on top of me, doing what you did,” JunSu laughed.
When we finally managed to find and open the door to the room YooChun was held captive we got shocked.
YooChun was tied to the bed of course, but only completely naked and crying.
“What happened?” me and JunSu asked.
“She.… She,” YooChun took a deep breath and continued:
“She raped me,” the tears started to stream down his cheeks.
We quickly started to untie him, and made sure he got all his clothes back on.
“I'll go check if she's still unconscious,” JunSu said and went off.
YooChun and I found YunHo and JaeJoong tied to the kitchen chairs in tiny girl panties, we just had to laugh.
“What happened to you guys?” YooChun laughed.
“She gave me a blow job before putting on these silly panties,” YunHo said ashamed.
“What about you JaeJoong?” I asked.
“She gave me the same treatment,” JaeJoong answered even more ashamed.
“But where is JunSu?” YunHo suddenly asked.
“I don't know,” I replied, then I remembered that he went to see if the crazy woman...
She couldn't, or could she?
We ran to the room where I and JunSu were held captive, but there was no one there.
“Ah!”
We could hear JunSu's voice coming from the bathroom, but it was locked.
We tried everything to get the door open, but nothing helped.
It got quiet, too quiet.
“We have to get in there!” I yelled.
Suddenly we could hear glass break; it had to be the bathroom window.
I panicked, I just couldn't think straight so I started to kick the door.
“You are brilliant!” JaeJoong shouted.
I looked stupidly at him, but luckily YunHo took the hint and took his super strong karate kick on the door.
It flew away, all the way over to the other end of the room.
We looked around, but the only thing we could see was that the bathtub was full of water and some hair disappearing in it.
“BATHTUB!!!” I shouted and ran towards it.
I dragged JunSu's body out of the bathtub and started to slap him on his face.
“I don't think that would help,” YooChun said.
“Why?” I asked.
“He has surely swallowed plenty of water,” JaeJoong replied.
“You have to give him mouth to mouth,” YunHo said.
“Ugh!” I said and looked at JunSu's pale face.
“What the hell, here it goes,” I said and leaned towards his mouth.
Suddenly JunSu opened his eyes and started to cough up water, he looked at me a while before he said:
“I have to tell you this before I die,”
“Don't say that, you are going to be just fine,” I assured him, he smiled for a little while and continued.
“I've always wanted to die with you guys by my side,” he started to breathe heavily.
“You're not going to die you dimwit,” I smiled and could feel the tears pushing.
“I,” his breath was starting to get weaker.
“Don't talk,” I said.
“I...” he blacked out.
“Don't leave me,” I cried, I just couldn't hold the tears back anymore.
My best friend couldn't just die like that, suddenly we could hear someone knocking at the front door.
“Who can that be?” YooChun asked.
“Don't open, it might be that crazy woman,” YunHo said.
The knocking went from calm knocking to kicking.
“We have to go,” they nagged me, but I couldn't leave JunSu.
I got on my feet and started to lift him, but he was too heavy.
“Help me,” I said to them, but YunHo had other ideas.
“We have to leave him here,” he said.
“NO!” I shouted; “He IS still alive, and he IS part of our group,”
“ChangMin has got a point YunHo, we can't just leave him,” JaeJoong agreed.
Luckily YunHo gave in and helped me carry JunSu out the back door.
It had started to snow, and we had almost nothing to wear.
Luckily I remembered that I had a GPS on my cell phone so we managed to get back to where we came from.
It was a long walk back to our cabin.
We had to take turns carrying JunSu 'cause he was very heavy.
Luckily he had started to breath, but he was very cold and at the same time very hot.
As soon as we got back to the cabin we had to take all of JunSu's clothes off, and put him to bed.
We had to put ice-cold towels on him, 'cause he was burning up.
JunSu was present, but his eyes were always closed.
We fed him and made sure that he wasn't too cold or too hot.
JunSu finally started to get better on the 4th day of our vacation, but he wasn't strong enough to do anything but moving his head a little.
I sat down on his bed and looked at him, he looked so miserable.
“JunSu?” I whispered, he opened his eyes and looked deep into mine.
A warm breeze went from my head to my toes, I blushed, I just knew I did.
“I'm hungry.”
That was his first words since he blacked out.
“I thought you'd be, so I brought you some soup,” I smiled.
“I don't want soup,” he pouted.
“What do you want then?” I replied.
“A big juicy burger,” he smiled.
“I'll see what I can do,” I said, got up and petted him on the head.
I made JaeJoong make a burger, but I told him that it was for me.
I wanted them to get surprised when JunSu came walking down the stairs, if he had gotten better.
I took the burger up to JunSu's and my room.
JunSu lied on the floor and breathed real heavy; I put the burger on the nightstand and hurried towards him.
He lied faced down, so I turned him around.
He grabbed my shirt and looked painfully at me before he said:
“Help me,”
I told him to hold on and ran down to the others.
“Is there a car here?” I asked.
“Nope, only a buss, but it doesn't get up here until 9 am tomorrow,” JaeJoong answered.
What to do now?
I couldn't stand still, I couldn't even think.
After about 20 seconds of hesitation I ran out the door and towards the mayor's house.
And of course he didn't have a phone; my cell phone was dead so I couldn't use that either.
The town didn't have any doctor, so I had to run all the way down to the city.
It was about 20 km away, so it didn't take long before I got exhausted.
But I had to keep running, I just had to.
I ran and ran, and when I finally got to the hospital I could barely walk.
I managed to find a doctor relatively fast; I told him that JunSu had problems breathing.
He drove me back up with an ambulance.
Luckily we got to JunSu just in time; the doctor put JunSu in the back of the ambulance and advised me to come back to the hospital with them.
Of course I asked why, and then he said:
“You ran about 20 km barefoot, I'll have to check your feet,”
“Oh,” I replied, how could I forget.
The next day the other guys came to visit, my feet were just fine I thanked them.
But JunSu was put in an artificial coma, he looked pretty miserable.
The doctor came in and said:
“The only chance Kim JunSu has to live, is to stay in coma, but he will die.”
“You just said..” I started, but the doctor interrupted me.
“He will only live for two maybe three days tops. Does he have any close relatives alive?”
I didn't want to startle his parents, so I said that they died in a car crash three years ago.
“Which one of you is his closest friend?” the doctor asked.
“It's Shim,” JaeJoong said and pushed me in front of the doctor.
“What do you want to do?” the doctor asked me.
I could feel the tears pushing, I swallowed.
“Just let him stay in the coma till he dies,” I said.
“You know that it would be better if you just let him go right now,” the doctor said.
“He knows that, but it's too hard for him. JunSu, Kim JunSu is Shim's best friend. He just loves him too much,” YooChun explained.
“Well, I'll leave you guys alone. Maybe Mr. ChangMin changes his mind,” the doctor said and left us.
When the night came I stayed with JunSu while the other guys went back to the cabin.
YooChun made me promise to rethink my decision till the next day.
I felt completely alone that night, it seemed like I was the only one in the whole world.
I climbed into the bed were JunSu lied and held on tight, I never wanted that night to end.
I don't know what came over me, but I kissed JunSu on his cheek and said sadly:
“Don't you ever leave me.”
I put my head on his chest and I could swear that JunSu answered:
“I won't.”
I closed my eyes and whispered:
“I'll never let you go, I'll never leave you and I'll never ever let you out of my sight ever again.”
The next day when I got up I couldn't remember where I was, but I got reminded very fast when the doctor came in.
“Have you decided?” he asked.
I took a deep breath before I said:
“It has been very hard for me, I'll give him till tonight,”
The doctor nodded and left, I held JunSu's hand and said quietly:
“I believe in you, so don't you let me down.”
I spent the rest of that day sitting by JunSu's bed, holding his hand and talking to him.
I talked about everything, about old times, when I was a kid and how scared I was.
I even sang for him, I sang “Doushite”, “Rainy Night”, “Begin”, “Forever love”, “Fly away”, “Lovin' you” and my favorite: “I Love You”.
When the evening came the other guys and I stood by JunSu's bed, we said goodbye to him as the doctor pulled the plug.
When it was done the guys wanted me to join them at the cabin, but they knew that I didn't want to leave JunSu even if he was dead.
But when the doctor told me that they wouldn't move his body until 11 am the next morning, I decided to go with the others.
When we got back to the cabin JaeJoong made a huge dinner, the other two made sure that it got cozy in the living room and found a movie we could watch.
I wanted to help, but they insisted that I'd rest.
We watched “Eagle Eye” and “Desturbia”, and after that we went to bed.
It was so quiet.
I turned on the TV and watched an American soap, it was very boring so I switched channel.
Some of the channels weren't sending anything, but all of the others were sending football.
How could I not begin to think of JunSu when I saw football?
It was his favorite sport in the whole world; I couldn't bear watching so I turned it off.
It think it was in the middle of the night, 'cause it was completely black outside.
I tossed and turned, I couldn't sleep, and unfortunately I didn't have any sleeping pills.
I got up and went to see if YooChun was awake, 'cause his room was the closest to mine.
I opened the door, but of course he was asleep.
I went to check on JaeJoong and YunHo, they were awake and talking to each other.
They didn't notice me at first, but when they saw me they got quiet.
“J-just go back to sleep ChangMin,” YunHo said.
“I can't,” I replied.
“Did you have a nightmare?” JaeJoong asked.
“I just couldn't sleep,”
“Do you want us to put a madras on the floor, so you can sleep here?” YunHo asked.
“No, its okay, I just wanted to see if I was the only one who couldn't sleep,” I said and went back to my own room.
I lied on my bed and just looked at the roof.
“What am I doing here?” I asked myself; “Why aren’t I with JunSu?” and suddenly I realized it.
I had to be with him, dead or not, I just had to.
I ran down the stairs, put on my shoes and started walking towards the city.
I kept thinking of what I should say to the doctor if I met him, and what to say to JunSu if they let me in.
I started to run, I just had to hurry, but I didn't know why and I still don't.
When I got to the hospital the doctor stood in the door smoking.
“What brings you back down here at this hour?” he asked.
I hesitated for a while before I said:
“I just have to be with him,”
“You know that he's dead, right?” he said.
“I'm not stupid, I'm just not ready to let him go just yet,” I replied.
“I understand, you may go in,” he said and opened the door; I went straight to JunSu's room and sat down on the bed.
I started to sing “Don't want to wait forever”, have you heard it? If not, you have to listen to more music.
I lay down beside him, and said:
“I think I'm in love with you, but it's probably too late for me to say that now. Hmm?”
I sighed, lay my head on his chest and said:
“Even if you're dead, I'll never let you go,” and not a second after that I fell asleep.
Early the next day I could feel someone caress my hair and say:
“I'll never let you go either,”
I opened my eyes, sat up and looked at JunSu's face.
He was smiling at me, the tears started to roll down my cheeks.
“Why are you crying?” he asked.
“I thought you were dead,” I answered and managed to smile a little.
“And leave you? No chance,” he smiled and wiped away my tears.
I got completely lost in him, I wanted to kiss him, but I wouldn't dare.
“I heard what you said last night,” he said, I swallowed.
“Y-you did?” I asked embarrassed.
“Yes, and I feel the same way about you,” he answered and leaned against me.
I swallowed; I could feel the tears starting to roll down my cheeks again.
JunSu bit his lip and looked passionate at me, it was going to happen any second now.
“I'm scared,” I confessed.
“Of what?” JunSu asked and got closer.
“It won't work,” I answered.
“You love me don't you?” JunSu asked.
“Yes,” I replied embarrassed.
“Then what's the problem?” he asked and looked deep into my eyes.
“I'm not ready,” I said and looked away.
JunSu smiled and said:
“You just come around at your own time.”
After that we hugged each other, and then he said:
“Do you know where my clothes are?” I couldn't help laughing.
“It's not funny,” he said strict.
“I'll tell the doctor to bring your clothes,” I said and went to get him.
The doctor got surprised;
“What a miracle,” he said, “What a miracle.”
We asked the doctor to call YunHo on his phone and tell him that I had gotten in an accident.
So when YunHo got the call, he and the guys hurried to the hospital.
The doctor greeted them by the front door and said:
“His state is critical, he might die.”
He led them to the room where I and JunSu sat.
“Isn't this where JunSu is?” YooChun asked.
“His body was removed earlier because of Shim ChangMin's accident,” the doctor replied and opened the door.
You should have seen their faces when they saw me and JunSu sitting on the bed.
“Y-you're alive,” they said and ran towards us.
“Group hug!” JaeJoong smiled and hugged us all.
When we were done hugging, YunHo noticed that JunSu and I were holding hands and asked:
“Why are you holding hands?” I blushed and quickly let go of JunSu's hand.
“Are you alright? I mean, were you really in an accident ChangMin?” YooChun asked.
“No he wasn't, we just wanted to lour you down here and give you a huge surprise,” JunSu answered and took hold of my hands; he looked deep into my eyes.
I felt warm and dizzy, but I also got very scared.
I don't know why, but there was just something about the way I felt that frightened me.
“You see, we've gotten 'kinda close,” I said and blushed again.
“Then I and Jaejoong have something to confess too,” YunHo said.
“I'll just leave you guys,” the doctor said and left.
“What then? You gay too?” YooChun teased.
“Actually we are,” JaeJoong said a bit embarrassed.
“WHAT THE HELL!?!” YooChun shouted.
“You know when you came into our room last night ChangMin?” YunHo said.
“Yeah?” I answered.
“Well, it was that we were talking about. Our feelings for each other that is,” JaeJoong continued.
“Oh. So you're together now, right?” JunSu asked.
“Kind of,” YunHo smiled.
“'Kind of!?!” JaeJoong exclaimed; “Last night we agreed that we were together!”
“Hehe,” YunHo laughed carefully.
“You prick,” JaeJoong said and hit YunHo on his head.
“I guess that it's my turn to confess something now,” YooChun said seriously.
“Shoot,” JunSu said.
“You see...” he started.
“Oh get to the point will you!” YunHo nagged.
“I love you ChangMin,” YooChun almost yelled out.
You can imagine how shocked we got when he said that.
“Since when?” I asked.
“Since last year,” he said and hang with his head.
“But why didn't you say anything?” JunSu asked.
“I was afraid that I would get rejected,” YooChun answered.
“You know that you're 'kinda late?” JunSu said.
“I know now, 'cause you and ChangMin are together now,” YooChun replied ashamed.
“We're not together, we've just gotten closer. But that doesn't mean that I'm gay,” I said.
“Oh,” YooChun said and smiled a little.
We had another group hug and went back to the cabin to spend the next week together, without any more adventures.
When we got back to the cabin, we sat down at the kitchen table and played cards.
“This is 'kinda boring,” YooChun said after about ten minutes.
“Then go do something else,” JunSu smiled.
“Like what?” YooChun replied.
“I don't know; play a game at the playstation3?” JunSu answered a little irritated.
YooChun went into the living room and turned on the TV, YunHo gave JaeJoong a weird look and said:
“I'm gonna go to bed early.”
“It's only 3 pm,” I said.
“I'm tired,” YunHo smiled and went upstairs.
“Me too,” JaeJoong said and followed YunHo.
“I'm pretty sure that “I'm tired” means let's go cuddle,” JunSu said and looked stupidly at me.
“I think so too,” I smiled.
We could hear YooChun laugh at something, so we went to see what it was.
Of course he was watching Super Junior's reality show; we didn't quite get what the funny thing about a card kissing game was....
We had absolutely nothing else to do so we just sat down and watched the show.
About an hour later football was supposed to start, but the reality show wasn't finished so JunSu had to go up to see it.
I figured that football was better than some stupid reality show about the Super Juniors, therefore I went with him.
We lived in the bed and watched, but it lasted only for about one hour.
We spent the rest of the evening talking; we started laughing when we heard some weird noises come from YunHo and JaeJoong's room.
They weren't that weird; we just couldn't help laughing, 'cause we knew what kind of noises they were.
At about midnight we could hear YooChun coming up the stairs and enter his room.
It got quiet, JaeJoong and YunHo must have fallen asleep, but the silence got broken by YooChun's voice saying:
“Oh baby,”
We started to laugh again, how sick could he get?
We figured that YooChun believed that we all were asleep, he would never do things like that if he knew that we were awake.
YooChun's noises just kept on going.
“I can't believe that he's still going for it,” JunSu laughed.
After a while we both got tired, but we couldn't sleep.
JunSu removed the extra quilt and moved closer to me, I got very nervous.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“I'm fine,” I answered, but I lied, I wasn't okay at all.
He put his hand around me; it slowly got more and more difficult to breathe.
“Goodnight,” he said, kissed me on the cheek and fell asleep.
I leaned against him and closed my eyes, how could I be so scared and at the same time feel so safe?
The next morning when I woke up, I found myself lying alone.
I wondered if it all could have been a dream, but then JunSu came in the door, turned on the light and smiled:
“Rise and shine princess.”
I sighed and put my pillow on my face.
JunSu lay down beside me and I just had check if he was looking at me.
I moved the pillow a little and looked straight into his eyes, I blushed and pulled the pillow in front of my face again.
“Are you okay?” JunSu asked.
What is it with this guy? I thought; why has he always got to ask if I'm okay?
“Yes,” I snapped at him.
“What's wrong?” he asked.
“You!” I snapped again.
“What about me?” he said.
“Why do you always have to ask if I'm okay!?! It's bloody annoying!” I almost yelled.
“ME!?! You're the one being annoying! Of course I ask if you're okay, that’s what friends do,” JunSu snapped back.
“Me annoying? You must be kidding,” I said calmly.
“Don't you even THINK about blaming this on me!” JunSu shouted.
“I'M NOT!” I yelled.
“IS THAT SO!?!” JunSu started to get very angry now.
“Calm down,” I commanded him.
“Some friend you are, blaming me!” he said huffy and barged out the door.
“YOU ASSHOLE!” I shouted after him, but there was no reply.
When I finally got up and went down, JunSu sent me a deadly look and went upstairs.
“What's wrong with him?” YunHo asked me.
“Don't meddle in things you don't understand,” I snapped at him.
“I'm the leader. I can't have you guys fighting, we're all in this together,” YunHo reminded me.
“Just fuck off okay,” I answered cheeky and left the cabin.
I never wanted to see any of them again, especially JunSu.
I was so angry with him, but why? He hadn't done anything wrong.
“Fucking bastard,” I said to myself and started walking towards the city.
There was a warm breeze, but I felt so cold, I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks.
When I had walked for about ten minutes my cell phone called, it was JunSu.
“Jerk,” I said and put it back in my pocket, but it wouldn't stop calling.
I picked up and said:
“What do you want, you jerk?”
But it wasn't JunSu's voice, it was JaeJoong's voice answering my question.
“You have got to get back here right now,” he said scared.
“What? Why?” I asked.
“It's JunSu, he's...” I could feel my heart beating faster when JaeJoong stopped.
“What about JunSu?” I continued to ask.
“He is going to jump from the veranda,” JaeJoong said quickly.
“Hold on, I'll be there as soon as I can,” I said and hung up.
I started to run; all kinds of questions went through my head.
Why would he try to jump from the veranda? Why did we fight? Why did I hurry to get back to him when I hated him so much? Did I really hate him? Did I love him? Why can't I admit that I'm gay, why?
When I got back to the cabin, I ran up the stairs and out to the veranda.
“STOP!” I shouted as JunSu was about to jump, he turned around.
I could see the tears rolling down his cheeks.
“I thought I'd lost you,” he said.
“You'll never lose me, I love you” I smiled, but JunSu could see that I was lying.
“You're just saying that so I won't jump,” he answered and turned away.
“I really do,” I tried.
“Spare me,” he said and almost jumped, but I managed to stop him once again.
“I may not love love you, but I DO love you,” I said.
“It's not the same, I can't live without you,” he said and looked at me.
“We're still friends, and I'm sorry for snapping at you. Can you ever forgive me?” I said.
“Of course I forgive you, but the question is, will you forgive me?” he said.
“You're my best friend, why wouldn't I?” I smiled.
JunSu smiled back at me, but then he slipped and fell.
I hurried towards the veranda rail and looked down, I couldn't see him.
But then I heard him say:
“A little help please?”
I looked down and saw him holding on to the veranda floor, I grabbed his hand and with help from the others I managed to drag him back up.
I looked deep into JunSu's eyes; I really wanted to kiss him, but again the fear took hold of me.
I gave him a hug, I could feel that JunSu was disappointed, so I held on tight.
“You guys are weird,” YooChun said and left.
“We'll leave you two alone for a while,” YunHo said and pulled JaeJoong with him back into the cabin.
We had a heart to heart talk and managed to understand each other better, but I didn't tell him that I was afraid to be gay.
Instead I told him that I was afraid to love and be loved, 'cause that's technically true.
The rest of the week I spent making sure that JunSu never ever was sad, if he hurt his head I'd put ice on it and if he got a splinter I'd get it out and put a plaster on.
One day when he got ill, I stayed by his side, not because I had to, but because I wanted to.
I fed and tended him; the other guys thought that I was weird.
They said that I acted as if we were married, but I was too smart to care about what they thought.
And when the time to go back home finally came, I had managed to get JunSu healthy again.
We thanked the town's mayor for a nice stay and took the buss to the city where we took another buss back home.
It was a long trip back, so I was glad that we had a private bus.
Most of the trip JunSu was asleep, but even if it was a bit cruel I woke him up regularly to make sure he got something to eat.
Every time I woke him up he'd say:
“We back home yet?”
And I'd feed him, 'cause he didn't really want to eat.
Every time he had finished he'd put his head on my shoulder and fall asleep.
When we got back to our group house we said goodbye to each other and went back home to our own small apartments, but YunHo went home with JaeJoong.
“What do you think they are going to do?” JunSu smiled.
“I'd rather not know,” I smiled back, JunSu looked at me with a “I'm gonna get you” 'kinda look.
“You wouldn't dare,” I said and pointed my finger at him.
“Oh no?” he said, he made a crazy look on his face and came closer.
“Stay away from me,” I laughed, but that doesn't work when you're laughing.
I turned around and started to run, of course JunSu was right behind me.
We ran and ran, we even laughed.
After a while I could see my apartment door, I started to speed up.
And when I got to the door I stopped so JunSu flew passed me, it looked so funny when he turned around and ran back.
JunSu managed to stop me by the door.
He held me against the wall, grabbed hold of my hand and held it against his heart and said:
“In my heart....... There's you,”
“JunSu,” I smiled.
“You know that I love you, right?” he asked and looked passionate at me.
“Of course I know, you dimwit,” I smiled and gave him a hug.
I could feel his hands caress my body, it felt so good.
We just stood there looking at each other, but then I started to get scared again.
JunSu could feel it, I just know that he could.
“I guess I have to go now, it's quite a long way to my apartment,” JunSu said and kissed me on my forehead.
I opened my apartment door and went inside, but then I turned around grabbed JunSu's arm and pulled him against me.
“I love you too,” I said and kissed him on his lips, JunSu smiled.
“You sure took your time, bye ChangMin,” he said and when he was about to turn around and walk, I grabbed hold of his jacket and pulled him inside.
JunSu shut the door and I turned on the light, but JunSu turned it off again and started kissing me.
I opened his jacket and he slowly took it off, he smiled, I smiled, we both smiled.
When JunSu started to open my jacket I got scared again, but it felt so right, I just let him take it off.
“You okay?” he asked and looked passionate at me.
I couldn't answer, I just couldn't get a single word out of my mouth.
“We don't have to do this you know,” he said and looked a little scared himself.
“No, I want to,” I smiled.
JunSu took off his sweater and t-shirt; I could see the contour of his perfect body.
Slowly he came towards me; I swallowed and bit my lip.
We stood completely close; he placed his hands on my waist and started to lift my sweater.
And when he had removed my t-shirt he gave me a hug, I could feel his strong arms wrap around me.
We were by the way standing by the sofa, so when JunSu let go, he leaned against me.
I closed my eyes and waited, but instead of a kiss he pushed me into the sofa and ran laughing into my bedroom.
“You asshole,” I laughed, I could see JunSu's head appear from behind the bedroom door.
“Come and get me big boy,” he teased and vanished.
“You bet I will,” I answered and went into my room.
JunSu jumped me from nowhere, we fell into the bed.
We just lied there looking at each other and then I said:
“I'm still scared.”
“Don't worry, I won’t hurt you,” JunSu smiled.
“Not like that you dimwit,” I smiled and hit him softly on his head.
“The best way to not being scared anymore, is to face your fears,” he said seriously.
“Are you afraid to gay?” he continued.
“'kinda,” I answered
“Well, there's no holding back now,” he smiled, I looked unintelligible at him.
“Yeah, you just kissed me,” JunSu said and smiled his adorable smile.
He's got a point, I thought.
I AM gay, and there is nothing I can do about it, not even if I wanted to.
After about 3 minutes of just looking at each other, JunSu got up and smiled:
“Let's go to bed.”
“Why?” I asked a little scared.
“Just trust me,” he replied and shut the door.