Fic: Forever and Always
Title: Forever and always
Author: Eiben
Beta: mira_jade_fics - thanks to you
Pairing: Jim/Molly
Rating: PG
Wordcount: ~1200
Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I would, you'd already have noticed.
Summary: Dreams can suddenly turn into nightmares.
Molly awakens and hopes that this is real.
It is warm around her and everything is soft. It smells like oranges, sea and sand, and she feels confortable. Someone kisses her and even with closed eyes she knows it is Jim, because he tastes like him. Like mint and honey. His lips move against hers, gentle and slow, before he moves back, just to come back immediately when she moves her hand.
She opens her mouth when she feels his tongue flicker against her lips, slowly exploring her as if this was their first kiss; tracing the outlines of her mouth before slipping in. His hand strokes her hair, which must look messy. For a moment Molly wishes she would be one of those filmstars who obviously wake up looking perfect but then, this is reality and it's so much better.
He pulls back again, hugging her, turning her on her side before kissing her again, short touches of their lips, so fast she barely notices their absence and her hand gropes for his. Their fingers fit perfectly together and Molly apologizes briefly for doing anything with them but touching him.
She feels his touch on her face and snuggles against him. No, she doesn't want to open her eyes, she doesn't want to see anything. She wants to dream just a little longer...
"Molly?" Jim says.
"Hmmm?" she is not ready to talk now.
"Are you awake?"
"Yes," she whispers and pulls him closer again. He took a shower, his skin is still wet.
"Do you think you are ready for being my wife?" he asks her ears, so quiet she barely understands him.
Yes, today. She has waited so long, and now they will finally marry.
Wedding.
What a beautiful word this is.
"I think so," she says and smiles.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
She doesn't want to be anything other. She wants to be with Jim, like this, forever. Jim from IT, who is obviously not gay, even if he gave Sherlock his number. Jim who kisses her again, deep and long and his tongue sends shivers down her spines before she has even opened her eyes.
"You're wonderful," he answers and his voice sounds as insecure as it did when they first met.
"You too," she murmurs.
Then she opens her eyes and everything is bright. All is white, her pillow, the room, and the curtains; and Jim's hair looks almost black. But he smiles and she thinks it is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen. It seems so certain, as if nothing could destroy this moment and if nothing could harm them.
-
Clarissa closes the zipper and Molly turns around to examine her wedding dress. It is beautiful, more than she imagined as she bought it. She feared that the white would make her look like a corpse, but instead she feels like she's beautiful and untouchable. She looks like she is lucky.
She can hear Jim's voice outside and Clarissa's answer which sounds like "piss off".
Clarissa never liked Jim. She always thought he was a bit too shy and a bit to ordinary.
But Molly has to smile as she listens to the steps of her future husband fade away on the hotel floor. Because this is her day, and Jim's. It is the beginning of something beautiful and it is exactly as she imagined when she was young, from the first kiss in the morning.
"You look great," Clarissa says and hugs her. "How do you feel?"
There is just one true answer.
"I'm happy," Molly replies.
-
Everyone is here today. Her mother turns around to look for her, and she can see her father smiling from next to her while she makes her way up the church stairs. Through the open door she can see Jim talking to his best friend, Sebastian. People talk, she does know the most of them. They are her guests. Jim didn't invite his family and just a few of his closest friends are present. Molly knows he has a very difficult relationship to his father and they were never introduced, but she knows all of Jim's friends. John Watson sits near the door, and he watches the boys closely and seems to be uncomfortable. They just invited him because Molly thought, maybe, just maybe, he would bring Sherlock along but obviously this isn't the case.
Everything is perfect.
Her father squeezes her hand a little before he links their arms and they begin to walk down the hallway.
Every head is turned towards her. Everyone is watching her and she sees how the people are smiling, getting carried away by the beautiful atmosphere of this place, of the church and the sun. Molly knows that this is is right. The girls told her that she would have doubts, that she would want to blow the whole thing off and run away. But she can't remember anything has ever felt so right before.
She raises her head and looks directly into Watson's eyes. He's the only one who does not seem to be happy with her. He looks thrilled and his hand tremble slightly. But right now she isn't going to worry. Maybe he's just insecure because he knows nearly no one here. She will ask him later about that.
Molly thinks she has never seen Jim look this beautiful. He smiles to her and he looks really handsome in his suit which, to the contrary of his usual clothing, doesn't seem to be bought but...tailored?
When she reaches him, he shortly touches her hand.
Yes, this is real.
-
"You may kiss the bride now," the priest says and the ceremony is almost finished. She has never been so excited. Just one more kiss and they will be together. Forever. Because being married is better than dating. It is better than living together. It feels better than everything else on this planet.
Her face almost hurts because she smiled the whole time. And now, Jim pulls her closer and his lips touch hers. There is no tongue this time, but it's still intimate. She feels like it's a promise, like "I'll keep you safe" and "Nothing will ever happen" and "I love you" And she answers when she moves and responds to the kiss. A big bright "YES".
She barely notices the laughter and the clapping hands in the background. People come closer but she doesn't realize it.
Jim looks at her and he smiles. He bows, as if they were in the nineteenth century and were just being introduced. "Mrs. Moriarty-"
-
Mollys eyes snap open. Everything is dark and she is alone. Her heart races and she knows she has been sweating.
God, let this be a dream. Let it be wrong.
Her bed next to her is empty and as she turns on the light she can see the familiar walls of her own flat.
She swallows back the tears that go with the loneliness, disappointment and shame. How can she dream this? How can she even dare to wish-?
Trembling she rises and stumbles to the bathroom. The water washes away the heavy tiredness and brings her back to reality.
It is three in the morning and she knows she won't sleep again. It's too dangerous. She always dreams of him.
She leaves the bathroom and turns on the TV. Maybe he's on the news again tonight. At least this will remember her why she has just ice-cream to soothe herself now.