The Greyness of it All
Another Super Long Post
Friday the 13th of July 2007 at around noon, my father's bestfriend of close to 30 years died after having a heart attack the week before.
I received an SMS from my dad that he was on his way to the hospital because according to him he felt that his friend was very close to letting go.
I was already running late and already feeling less than excited to go to work I was in a conundrum - go to work and conduct call simulations and compute the grades for 32 trainees or ask the tricycle driver to instead head to the hospital and possibly witness a person die.
And then things suddenly became half-clear. In ten minutes I was in the hospital ward hugging my crying father who just saw his bestfriend die at 57.
It's like swallowing a piece of ice - a slow and cold passage within you that rarely happens, but the few times it has happened are more than strong enough to leave a lasting memory, albeit an unpleasant one.
Within an hour I was able to text the people who I consider to be my best friends, the inner planets that I wrote so many times, so many months ago. They're not my inner planets because they revolve around me, they're there because when things around me go double-ass crazy all I have to do is remind myself that they're present in my life and things go only single-ass crazy which is always better than the original.
Every year my dad and his bestfriend Deborah goes to Manila to visit the North Cemetery. This year it will be me who will accompany my dad to the on All Soul's Day since his bestfriend's grave will be one of our stops within that day.
My father is a very friendly person, a trait I got from him - to befriend anybody and everybody regardless of their age, gender, level of intelligence, or the size of their bank accounts. The only difference we have when it comes to the friendships we form is that he stuck to only one, whereas I have no invisible chain linking me to one single person. Maybe it's the age and the fact that the people I feel closest to are the same people who live the farthest from me.
My father and Deborah became friends when they were around my age today, give or take a couple of years.
Now, I don't hesitate to reply to my friends' test messages and even if I am closer to my dad than 90 percent of the population is close to theirs, I naturally doubled the effort...effortlessly.
By the end of Friday, after seeing my dad regressed to being a child for 5 minutes, I was reminded that life goes on and a little bit of sugar can make things go down easier, even if they're jagged pieces of frozen water.
The class I handled for three weeks and was able to program to associate carpeted areas with the English Only Policy sang two songs for me and gave me a bracelet just to let me know I was and still am appreciated.
Now I know why I'm not as horny or as bad with managing money like before.
When good things are done they set off a melody of lightness that drowns out the trivial and gray things pester and consume the aimless and bored.
To my friends and acqaintances - I truly love you all.
Friday the 13th of July 2007 at around noon, my father's bestfriend of close to 30 years died after having a heart attack the week before.
I received an SMS from my dad that he was on his way to the hospital because according to him he felt that his friend was very close to letting go.
I was already running late and already feeling less than excited to go to work I was in a conundrum - go to work and conduct call simulations and compute the grades for 32 trainees or ask the tricycle driver to instead head to the hospital and possibly witness a person die.
And then things suddenly became half-clear. In ten minutes I was in the hospital ward hugging my crying father who just saw his bestfriend die at 57.
It's like swallowing a piece of ice - a slow and cold passage within you that rarely happens, but the few times it has happened are more than strong enough to leave a lasting memory, albeit an unpleasant one.
Within an hour I was able to text the people who I consider to be my best friends, the inner planets that I wrote so many times, so many months ago. They're not my inner planets because they revolve around me, they're there because when things around me go double-ass crazy all I have to do is remind myself that they're present in my life and things go only single-ass crazy which is always better than the original.
Every year my dad and his bestfriend Deborah goes to Manila to visit the North Cemetery. This year it will be me who will accompany my dad to the on All Soul's Day since his bestfriend's grave will be one of our stops within that day.
My father is a very friendly person, a trait I got from him - to befriend anybody and everybody regardless of their age, gender, level of intelligence, or the size of their bank accounts. The only difference we have when it comes to the friendships we form is that he stuck to only one, whereas I have no invisible chain linking me to one single person. Maybe it's the age and the fact that the people I feel closest to are the same people who live the farthest from me.
My father and Deborah became friends when they were around my age today, give or take a couple of years.
Now, I don't hesitate to reply to my friends' test messages and even if I am closer to my dad than 90 percent of the population is close to theirs, I naturally doubled the effort...effortlessly.
By the end of Friday, after seeing my dad regressed to being a child for 5 minutes, I was reminded that life goes on and a little bit of sugar can make things go down easier, even if they're jagged pieces of frozen water.
The class I handled for three weeks and was able to program to associate carpeted areas with the English Only Policy sang two songs for me and gave me a bracelet just to let me know I was and still am appreciated.
Now I know why I'm not as horny or as bad with managing money like before.
When good things are done they set off a melody of lightness that drowns out the trivial and gray things pester and consume the aimless and bored.
To my friends and acqaintances - I truly love you all.