i thought i should also include all the other thoughts in my head like i feel completly usuless and ugly how the two most important people in my life or they were i feel hate me and dont even want to see me, how i fear that im loosing a fire inside of me how i feel like im annoying eveyone and im fucking it all up the ass, im sorry this is not my ( Read more... )

so you want to know why ive been leaving, not hanging out and spending my nights just driving around ennding it watts talking to the homeless instead of hanging out with you well fine but be carefull what you wish for, im now doubting what is love and can there ever be an egoless love im doubting if love is trully that which connects this wourld ( Read more... )

i dont understand how people could love creation so much with out spending time to stare in wonder while somthing is being destroyed, i dont understand how they can say they understand creation when they refuse to even look at destruction how can any human truly understand anything without looking at the other side of the spectrum. and yes creation ( Read more... )

am i really that ugly, and i was doing so much better tody too.

my head is fucked up i hate it more than i hate my heart

i miss her i really do and i wish i can say it does not hurt but it hurts alot but if she thinks this is best then fine

im sorry for all i have done

i hope its not over but if is

i want to see your paintings in halls someday

okay so all day today thanks to the internet site not working i have been reading papers on philosophy,politics and physics, and now i once agan have a huge urge to leave this place so i want to know who wants to come and were do you want to go i just want to start planning it, im talking about small large or somewere in between trips so just leave ( Read more... )

its weird to have people care for you when your sick to want to see you and some not to see you not cause there afraid of getting sick but they belive/know it will make you better that much faster some will stay up with you at night while you well i donnt know what i did but i remeber it not being fun (sorry) its weird i dont know what to make of ( Read more... )

its to late to go back, to start again; but its always weird to think what would you do if you did go back would you do it all again would you force your self to make the mistakes so life would be the same or would you change it and then change fate would you want to change how things are would you want/need a new life for yourself would you risk ( Read more... )

i have no bloody clue what is wrong with my head these days, it just lost everything which i sweated and bloodied my fair share to have to hold and here it is loosing it all and not careing what the hell, and what the fuck was last night i dreamed of drinking once again and man THE BEST TASTING BEER EVER i cant even stop thinking about how good it ( Read more... )