Illegal Palpitations (Chapter 5)
Title: Illegal Palpitations
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance, Humor, Drama
Pairing: Donghae/Hyukjae
Warning: Hints of smut
Summary: It sucks when you’re boyfriend is on the other side of the law, but the rewards for hanging on and believing in that love are much more than Donghae and Hyukjae can ever imagine.
Role-play with tees2mai: She plays Hyukjae and I play Donghae
~*~
It was a week later and the doctors had given approval for Donghae to leave the hospital temporarily. There were still some puzzling results with their scans and they wanted to extend their observations.
But the meeting with the police couldn’t be put off any longer. And since Donghae had indicated, contrary to Hyukjae’s assumptions, that he didn’t mind giving up information of his old gang in exchange for protection, an interview was set up.
"We'll leave any time you want." Hyukjae whispered to Donghae as he helped him into his seat. Unlike Donghae, Hyukjae was still at unease with the whole situation. He wished they could have just run away. But it was dangerous and Hyukjae needed to stop thinking as just Donghae's boyfriend and needed to think like a cop again.
“I’m sure it’ll be alright.” Donghae patted Hyukjae’s arm, panting a little from the exertion. Laying back against the seat, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then he turned to face the board before him smiling. “Good afternoon.” He said politely.
Although, the interview board didn’t seem impressed by his civility, only asking. “So you’re Lee Donghae.”
Casting a wry smile at Hyukjae, Donghae nodded. “Yes. And I’ll answer your questions as best as I can.”
Hyukjae took the seat behind him, pulling it slightly closer. He was not going to leave Donghae's side and he had let his superiors understand that when the meeting was being set up. He squeezed Donghae's hand to encourage him.
"You are working for the underground mafia group the Lee Syndicate?" Another member of the board asked. "Tell us of your association with them."
“I worked for them.” Donghae corrected. “I was one of the advisors in the syndicate - a section head. I handled jobs that the boss gave me, mostly drug operations and money laundering. But that was before the boss gave the order to get torture me to get as much information about what I’d leaked to the police. If I didn’t squeak, then he said to kill me. He made it clear then that I was no longer part of the family.”
"And now you chose to turn on them?" The first member asked, jotting things down in a folder in front of him. Hyukjae sighed softly, staying still behind Donghae, quietly being his support.
"What is your relationship with Officer Lee Hyukjae? Have you exchanged information regarding any of our or the Lee Syndicates operations with him?"
Donghae gave them a wry grin. “My reason for turning on them is my relationship with Hyukjae. We’re lovers.” He paused, sighing. “Why I turned on them is because I know that if I don’t, I’m going to be hunted, and so is Hyukjae. And I can’t have that happening.”
There was a pause, then a frown from one of the board. “You haven’t answered our question. Have you exchanged information regarded any of ours or the Lee Syndicate operations with him?”
Donghae shook his head. “No. We were careful to keep work out of our discussions unless was necessary. The only time was when operations directly affected each other. However, any information we purely kept to ourselves, only using it if we needed to avoided confrontation. I…” Donghae trailed off, and for a moment, his eyes seemed to glaze a bit, unfocused.
Hyukjae looked at him when he paused, leaning in. "Donghae?" He whispered softly, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Hae?" He tried to bring him back to the present, ready to cancel the meeting right then and there.
The board members looked at Donghae. "Mr Lee?" One called out, still waiting for their answers.
But Donghae seemed to shake out of it then, blinking. “Oh sorry… uhmm… Oh. I never passed the information onto my boss or any of my subordinates. And from the way the police acted to our actions, I’d say Hyukjae never passed on the information either.”
Hyukjae kept looking at him with concerns as the interviewers continued to question him. "What information do you have for us Mr. Lee? Your laywer and Officer Lee have negotiated witness protection for you along with all charges dropped in exchange for your full cooperation." He explained to Donghae.
“Witness protection?” Donghae blinked, frowning, glancing at Hyukjae.
"It's the only way to make sure you stay safe... until the hearings and while you recover..." Hyukjae spoke to him. "And to keep an eye on you." He repeated his boss' words.
“But… what about… you…?” Donghae trailed off again, his eyes unfocusing.
Hyukjae looked around the board members watching them. "They won’t let me go with you. I have to stay behind and work on the case... plus it will be more dangerous if I go with you."
But Donghae didn’t seem to be responding, staring off into space.
One of the board members noticed Donghae’s lack of response. “Mr Lee? Mr Lee?”
"Donghae?!" Hyukjae got up out of his seat, kneeling in front of him. He patted his cheek gently, trying to get some form of response from him. "Call the paramedics!" He yelled out at the other people in the room.
But then, Donghae’s eyes focused again, and he blinked at Hyukjae. “Huh? What?”
"Donghae... you keep... you keep blanking out." Hyukjae told him gently, cupping his face. "Does your head hurt?"
“I do…?” Donghae blinked, shaking his head. “I don’t know… I feel a bit… wuzzy, but I figured it was just the effect of the drugs… It’s… I don’t know… a little hard to concentrate sometimes?”
Glancing over at the stitches on his head, Hyukjae frowned. "I've noticed... I think we should get you back home. This meeting is over." Hyukjae got up, putting his arms around him to help him up.
Donghae leaned against Hyukjae nodding, but he didn’t seem all that worried. But in fact, he was wondering why he wasn’t worried - he should be, but he didn’t seem to be able to bring together in his mind the panic and the thought that there might be something wrong with him.
“Wait! We haven’t gotten all the information we needed.” One of the interview board members protested.
"You can either interview him at my home or postpone this. He clearly isn't well enough to carry this on further. It would be worse if he gave out wrong information in his state." Hyukjae told off the interviewer. He held Donghae close, kissing his forehead as he began to lead him out of the room. "I think you just need a nice warm bath and I'll make you your favourite and you can nap a little..." Hyukjae told him gently.
Donghae nodded, smiling a little at the thought. “Mmm… that will be nice.”
They got the car with no problem, Hyukjae buckling him into the front seat. Leaning his head against the window he stared out of it. When Hyukjae got into the car he seemed to realize something. “Hyuk… you said you couldn’t follow me if I went under witness protection?”
Hyukjae began to drive them back towards their apartment, taking cuts he had used to take while they had still been a secret. He gripped his steering wheel and nodded. "I can't come with you."
"I won’t even know where you are."
Donghae let out a breath. “You didn’t tell me this earlier.” He said softly - both a question and an accusation.
"I'm sorry... I'm... I'm having a hard enough time remembering that I have to fix this now. It's my turn to take care of you and this... this was a hard decision. I knew if I had discussed with you that I would have immediately turned this down." Hyukjae tried to explain him. "I won't be able to live if something happens to you."
“…” Donghae was quiet for a moment. “I see the logic in this… but… what… what if I never see you again Hyuk? So many things could happen. You told me you were afraid to leave me, even just for a day. And truthfully, I am just as equally scared, although my hand is looser. But… we’re talking about years Hyuk.”
Hyukjae stopped the car as soon as they arrived in the parking garage of their apartment building. He reached over and took Donghae's hand. "I know you'd be safe... I don't know how I'll get by... but knowing you are safe.... it would help. I never want to leave your side but I don't know what else to do." Hyukjae looked at him.
“But… I won’t.” Donghae whispered, squeezing Hyuk’s hand back. “I won’t know if you’re safe. And if you’re going to be going against the Lee Syndicate… you won’t be.”
"If we don't finish this now they'll always be after us... after you." Hyukjae laced their fingers together. "I can't have that. The faster this is over, the faster we can be together."
Donghae swallowed, looking down at their laced fingers. “...Promise me. Promise me that we’ll see each other again. That you’ll come find me once everything is over.”
"I wouldn't want to be a moment without you that’s longer than necessary." Hyukjae promised him, before glaring. "And I swear to god, if for a moment.... you even look at someone else..." He shook his head, "I let it go while you worked for them but not anymore." His threatened Donghae, both serious and whiney.
Donghae laughed. “Oh no, no more of that. I can’t say I enjoyed it much anyway. You should give me a picture of you though, so I can jerk off in front of something.”
Hyukjae laughed, pulling him in for a kiss. "Or... I can take you home now and we can make a home movie for you to keep." Hyukjae nuzzled him.
“Even better.” Donghae murmured against Hyukjae’s lips.
Hyukjae smiled, kissing him again before pulling away. He continued to hold Donghae's hand as he finally drove them home, wanting to spend the evening making more memories for them to keep.
~*~
Donghae had been feeling a bit peckish. Not wanting to bother Hyukjae, especially since he was so busy at work nowadays, he decided to get his own food. He didn’t really want to waste money on delivery food either, so he decided that some instant ramyun was in order.
It wasn’t one of the best decisions he’d ever made.
Hyukjae stretched his arms as he finished reading yet another document, working on putting together all the evidence they had for their case. He got up from his chair and walked to the bedroom, hoping to find Donghae there. When he didn't Hyukjae began to search around the apartment until he reached the kitchen.
And a shock Hyukjae would get, for there stood Donghae in the kitchen, cooking his ramyun as he had intended. But the pot was boiling over, having been put over the fire too long, and Donghae was standing in front of it, chopsticks posed mid-stirring, a blank look on his face.
Hyukjae walked in, jumping into action immediate. He shut off the stove and pulling Donghae away immediately, not carrying about the chopsticks that fell to the floor. "Donghae!" He looked over the other, getting him way from the hot water and stove.
At the jolt, Donghae’s consciousness snapped back to reality, and he looked at Hyukjae in confusion. “Huh? What? Ow!” He winced, suddenly feeling the sharp burning pain in his hand.
Hyukjae gently took his hand, blowing at it softly. "Donghae." He said, voice strained. "Come..." He lead the other to the bedroom, getting out the first aid kit before sitting next to him.
Donghae didn’t argue, quietly following Hyukjae out. He sat down, watching as Hyukjae tended to his burn. “Hyuk... I’m sorry... I... I wasn’t thinking.”
They’d already established, after going back to the hospital for some checks, that Donghae had sustained some damage to his brain after the concussion. His brain synaptic pathways would fail to compute the electronic signals at times, as was the doctor’s explanation.
In other words, he would have episodes where he’d just zone out until someone or something snapped him out of it. The doctor also said that it would probably happen when he in the middle of complicated acts when his brain was working harder. Pushed too hard, his brain would be more likely to be unable to take the stress and shut down.
Whether this was permanent... the doctors still weren’t sure.
Hyukjae sighed and gently kissed his temple. "Could have called me to make you dinner." Hyukjae reminded him, applying cream to the burn and the bandaging it. "Still hungry?" He asked, giving him a smile. Hyukjae cupped his cheek, rubbing his thumb across it.
He had been trying to be as careful as he could with Donghae, relieving him of any stress he could manage too. Hyukjae wanted him to get better. He didn't want Donghae to suffer this any longer.
“Yeah...” Donghae sighed, closing his eyes. “I didn’t want to bother you because you were busy. I’m sorry... I just forgot.” He was used to doing things for Hyukjae, not the other way round, it was becoming frustrating, how he couldn’t do things that he used to without blanking out halfway and causing Hyukjae more problems than help.
Hyukjae shook his head, getting up, getting the kit away. "It's okay... it's never a bother." Hyukjae looked at him. "Want me to bring you dinner in bed?"
Donghae sighed, knowing Hyukjae would feel safer if he did. “Alright. I’ll just rest here, feeling a bit tired anyway.”
Hyukjae nodded, smiling before going to the kitchen. He quickly made Donghae's favourite, wanting to cheer was the other. Once he was done, he carefully put it all in a tray before carrying it to the other. "Hae." He called, smiling for him. "Dinner is here!"
Donghae sat up from where he was staring into space. Smiling he patted onto the bed. Knowing that Hyukjae probably made his favourite to try to cheer him up, and he didn’t want his bad mood to affect the other as well. “Feed me?” He asked cheekily.
Hyukjae laughed, sitting next to him. He checked to make sure Donghae was comfortable before picking up his chopsticks. "Ah, now I get to fulfill any motherly wishes I had." He half joked, preparing a bite and pressing it against Donghae's lips. "Say ah~"
That had hit a bit of a sore spot, but Donghae wasn’t the sort to pick on something that wasn’t intentional. Opening his mouth dutifully, he took the bite, chewing before opening his mouth again in the imitation of a baby bird. “Mama! Mama!”
Hyukjae poked his cheek. "Don't go overboard." He teased, feeding him some more. Hyukjae watched Donghae's face carefully, wishing he hadn't said that out loud. It really wasn't intentional. Hyukjae had always wanted kids. A dream that seemed to get pushed back at every stage of his life. From joining the police force to entering his dangerous lifestyle with Donghae. Not that it was anything he regretted.
When the food was finished, Donghae pulled Hyukjae into his arms, closing his eyes. “That was nice.” He murmured, pressing his lips against Hyukjae’s. Too bad he wasn’t really all himself at the moment.
Hyukjae pushed the tray away carefully, hugging him tightly. He didn't reply, choosing instead to lean against the other, letting him hold him like he used too before the incident when they'd be in bed. He didn't want Donghae to feel bad.
“I wish I could make love to you.” Donghae murmured. It hadn’t been wise to do so even though Donghae’s body had healed - with his mental state he’d probably pause halfway in the middle of sexual activity, and that would just be embarrassing. “At least once before I have to go.”
Hyukjae kisses his hand. "We'll get a chance." Hyukjae told him. "I promised you a day of anything you wanted before you had to go."
“Hmm... one whole day of sex does sound nice.” Donghae laughed, even as unfeasible as that was.
Hyukjae laughed, pecking him. "Let me nap in your arms? I missed doing that." He nuzzled him.
“Sure. Nap away.” Donghae held out his arms, a warm smile on his face.
Hyukjae snuggled against his chest, smiling. "Love you." He yawned, comfortable as always.
Donghae smiled, at that, kissing the top of Hyukjae’s head. “Love you too.” He whispered back.
And for that moment, everything was perfect.
If only it could have lasted forever.
~*~
“Are you sure the shipment was supposed to arrive yesterday.”
Donghae sighed for what he thought was the millionth time since the interview started. “Yes. The shipment was to arrive yesterday. That was the arrangement the last time I was in. But it’s highly likely they’d have changed it. They’d have guessed by now, especially after that successful raid, that I’ve told on them. They wouldn’t have moved it forward, because they’d know you have been watching. It’s more likely that they’d hope you get tired of watching. They can’t have shifted to another area, unless they managed to get an alliance with another family, which you said they haven’t. Last I knew it was a bit miffy in the underworld, with some hostilities between families, so it would be unwise to try to sneak this into another family’s area either.”
"We've gone over the maps you've shown us." Another officer spoke. "Of all their areas, marking the most likely ones. Point us the top three likely areas. We have to set up survallience there immediately." He poked as the maps were put up through a projector.
Hyukjae kept close to Donghae, holding his hand under the table, his eyes on the officers daring them to try and pressure Donghae with him around.
“There... there... and...” Donghae thought for a moment, rubbing his head. “There.”
“Alright... go call someone to get someone on watching those areas.” The officers stood up, getting into a flurry of activity. “We’ll have a short break, but once we’re done we’ll continue.”
Donghae sighed, leaning back and taking Hyukjae’s arm. “Man... they have a lot of questions don’t they?”
Hyukjae kissed his temple. "Are you feeling okay?" He asked, looking at the other carefully. "We'll get food if you are hungry." Hyukjae told him, gently running his fingers through his hair.
“Yeah. I’m fine. I’m just bored. “ Donghae grinned, patting Hyukjae’s cheek. “Wish they’d hurry up so we could go back and cuddle in bed.”
Hyukjae smiled at that. "Me too... It will be over soon. Another hour after the break. They promised. I won’t let them question you a second more."
“Mmm... I think I can handle another hour.” Donghae chuckled, then blinked when someone came over to them.
“Officer Lee, there’s a call for you. From the Lieutenant.”
Hyukjae sighed and nodded. "I'll be right back, Hae." He kissed him, not caring about who was watching them. Hyukjae had worked hard to earn respect from his co-workers. He had not time for those who thought less of him suddenly because of who he was in love with. He got up, giving Donghae another smile before following the messenger out.
Donghae smiled, when Hyukjae kissed him, winking at however might be watching, not caring about their judgemental stares. When Hyukjae left, he leaned back with a smile, thinking how he was so lucky having such a capable boyfriend like Hyukjae.
Unfortunately, that moment wasn’t to last.
“Alright, let’s start the next round.”
Blinking in surprise, Donghae sat back up, his eyes narrowing. “Hyukjae isn’t back yet.”
“No matter, I’m sure you can answer questions without him.” One of the officers said calmly, pressing forward. “Now, tell us. Who is the mole that the Lee Syndicate has planted into the facility?”
Donghae frowned at that. “I already told you. I don’t know.”
"You don't know? Are you withholding information from us... from what you tell us you were in the boss' good books. Perhaps this is all an act." The officer pressed on. "Maybe this is all an elaborate scheme to through us off your tracks. Tell, Mr Lee, are you using Officer Lee to acquire information and throw us off the tracks of the Lee Syndicate?"
Donghae’s lips thinned. “There are easier ways to throw you guys off the tracks. And stop questioning my relationship with Hyukjae. We’re lovers, fair and simple. I’ve told you that, he’s told you that. If you can’t trust me, at least trust him.”
"Is Officer Lee the Lee Syndicate mole?" Another officer spoke up, looking at Donghae.
Donghae’s eyes widened incredulously. “You can’t be serious.”
“Oh? Actually we are. It would make sense, since after all, the mole needs to come in constant contact with the Lee Syndicate, and you could be his contact point. The lover thing is just a cover in case he gets discovered.” The officer continued.
“Yes, and I suppose you’re going to say me getting tortured and shot was a scam too?” Donghae continued sarcastically. His eyebrows knitted together as he became more agitated, “Well, I’m sorry but even if that were true, what would be the point of me handing myself over to the police?”
“We don’t know. That’s what we’re trying to find out.”
Anger flared up in Donghae as he stood up, banging his hands on the table. “Of all the stupid things- ugh...”
Donghae suddenly winced, raising a hand to clutch at his head.
“And that mysterious condition of yours. Is it really a condition? Or is it just some ploy that you use to conveniently get out of any questions you can’t answer?” One of the officers came up, grabbing Donghae’s collar. “Hmm? Mr Lee?”
“Gah...” Donghae couldn’t even answer, couldn’t even hear the question. His head was ringing with pain, alarm bells in his body going off. “Noisy... So... noisy... S-shut up...”
It was at the same time Hyukjae was returning from a very strange and confusing phone call from his boss. He was frowning as he got back to the room only to notice Donghae and his pain right away. "Hae?!" He called out, rushing to his side immediately. His anger flaring as he noticed one of the interviewer’s eyes roll. He kneeled in front of his boyfriend, cupping his face. "Donghae?"
But Donghae couldn’t hear Hyukjae, the pain in his head was too much, and he just wanted it all to go away...
Stiffening in Hyukjae’s hold, Donghae’s eyes glazed, his mind shutting down on itself.
“Tch. How convenient.” The officer who had grabbed Donghae spat out sarcastically. “I guess we have to cancel the interview because he’s not well enough. Tch. This is probably just an act.”
Hyukjae would have turned around to punch that officer in the face but Donghae's well being was more important. He pulled out his phone, calling for an ambulance immediately. "Donghae.... please, Hae." He patted the other’s cheek, trying to get him to answer.
But unlike previous times, Donghae didn’t snap out of it. He remained in that blanked out state despite Hyukjae’s attempts to get his attention.
Hyukjae was growing more worried. It would take at least five minutes for the paramedics to arrive. He got up, sitting besides Donghae as he pulled him into his arm. "What did you ask him?!" He glared at his superiors.
“That’s classified information.” One of the officers said evasively. There had been a reason why they’d set up Hyukjae to leave Donghae alone for a while in the interview.
Hyukjae snorted at that. "Low attempt at getting me out of here... I knew that phone call was too suspicious and too convenient." Hyukjae spat. He gently cradled Donghae in his arm.
It didn't take much longer for the paramedics to barge in and finally get Donghae on a stretcher. Hyukjae followed him without sparing a glance to his superiors.
~*~
“He’s regained consciousness, but he’s just been through a lot of stress, don’t do anything to agitate him, alright?”
Hyukjae nodded, glancing through the window at Donghae. "I'll just take him his lunch." Hyukjae thanked the doctor, holding a bag of Donghae's favourite take away, walking into the room. "Hae?" He smiled, holding up the bag for him to see.
Donghae had been staring out the window, a strange expression on his face. When Hyukjae came in, he turned, staring for a moment before a lopsided smile came onto his face. “Hey... you bought a happy meal. My favourite.” But despite the smile, there wasn’t the usual childish excitement on his face when Hyukjae tried to do something sweet for him like this.
Hyukjae noticed the lack of.... Donghae, in the other. He walked over anyway, sitting down next to him. "They had that toy you wanted." Hyukjae pulled the table to them, putting the bag down. He took out everything from the bag, setting it up just the way Donghae liked it before handing him the toy. "Can I feed you?"
Donghae picked up the toy, staring at it for a while. Normally, he’d have already torn the plastic open in excitement, annoying Hyukjae with his excited cooing. But he only played with it in his hands, before quickly putting it back down. He sighed, looking away from Hyukjae. “I’m sorry, Hyuk...” He said softly. “Thanks for the food... but I’m not hungry.”
Hyukjae put down the fries he was holding, reaching out to put his hands over Donghae’s instead. "Talk to me." Hyukjae asked him. "What’s bothering you?"
Donghae kept quiet for a while, but he didn’t pull away from Hyukjae’s hands. Finally, he whispered. “... Everything...”
Hyukjae pushed the tray away again. "I'm scared." He admitted. "So much can go wrong and not just with this operation but... I don't want to leave you alone for even a moment."
“It’s not just that... it’s me as well.” Donghae seemed to struggle with his words for a moment. “I... This condition. Hyuk... I can’t even do anything by myself. If I cook something, I’ll probably burn myself. If I carry something, I’d mostly likely drop it. Sometimes I even catch myself blanking out in the middle of peeing.” He paused then, his voice choking up. “And today... it hurt so much. And I was out for so long... Hyuk... what if I’m getting worse? What if next time I can’t even walk? What if I can’t even see? And you’re right there but I can’t even see you? Hear you? Feel you? I’d rather die...”
"No!" Hyukjae snapped but quickly controlled himself. He sighed, shutting his eyes to calm himself. "Don't say such things... please." He looked at him. "I can't... I spent too long wondering if you were dead or alive already and I can't deal with this. You'll get better. You have too." Hyukjae looked at him pleadingly.
“I... I don’t know Hyuk. I don’t know if I can...” Donghae finally looked up, the tears clear in his eyes. “I’m so scared. I don’t know if I can keep my promise anymore, Hyuk...”
"Donghae we shouldn't be having this conversation right now. Doctor says not to agitate you." Hyukjae's voice was softer than usual, obviously hurt by Donghae's words. He squeezed his hand. "Please eat, you didn't have much at breakfast either. We can go home after this..."
Donghae was trembling, even as Hyukjae squeezed his hand. He knew he was being selfish - he was already giving Hyukjae so much trouble. But he... he just didn’t know. He was so scared... and so tired... “I’m sorry... I’m really not hungry.”
Then looking up, he whispered. “Can we... can we just... lie together in bed instead?”
Hyukjae nodded, quietly getting up and moving into bed with him. He slipped under the small blanket and cuddled Donghae, holding him like he was holding onto a life line.
Donghae buried his face into Hyukjae’s chest, unable to stop the tears. Weeks of pent-up stress and trying to carry on with life like everything was okay had finally taken its toll. He didn’t want to lose Hyukjae - not to the Lee Syndicate, not through separation, and certainly not because of his condition. But they were all closing on all sides, and Donghae felt like he was trapped with nowhere to go. “Please... I don’t want to leave you, Hyuk... I don’t...” He sobbed, fingers clutching the fabric of Hyukjae’s shirt.
Hyukjae held him closer and as tight as he could. He rubbed his back, letting Donghae cry for a bit. He hadn't all this while. "I don't want to leave you either." He whispered softly, trying to sooth him.
Donghae didn’t reply to that, sobbing softly in Hyukjae’s arms... and slowly, he drifted off to sleep, exhausted.
Hyukjae pulled the blankets over them, keeping Donghae in his arms as he slept. It wasn't until he was sure that Donghae wasn't going to wake up that he let his own tears fall before soon falling asleep as well.
~*~
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance, Humor, Drama
Pairing: Donghae/Hyukjae
Warning: Hints of smut
Summary: It sucks when you’re boyfriend is on the other side of the law, but the rewards for hanging on and believing in that love are much more than Donghae and Hyukjae can ever imagine.
Role-play with tees2mai: She plays Hyukjae and I play Donghae
~*~
It was a week later and the doctors had given approval for Donghae to leave the hospital temporarily. There were still some puzzling results with their scans and they wanted to extend their observations.
But the meeting with the police couldn’t be put off any longer. And since Donghae had indicated, contrary to Hyukjae’s assumptions, that he didn’t mind giving up information of his old gang in exchange for protection, an interview was set up.
"We'll leave any time you want." Hyukjae whispered to Donghae as he helped him into his seat. Unlike Donghae, Hyukjae was still at unease with the whole situation. He wished they could have just run away. But it was dangerous and Hyukjae needed to stop thinking as just Donghae's boyfriend and needed to think like a cop again.
“I’m sure it’ll be alright.” Donghae patted Hyukjae’s arm, panting a little from the exertion. Laying back against the seat, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then he turned to face the board before him smiling. “Good afternoon.” He said politely.
Although, the interview board didn’t seem impressed by his civility, only asking. “So you’re Lee Donghae.”
Casting a wry smile at Hyukjae, Donghae nodded. “Yes. And I’ll answer your questions as best as I can.”
Hyukjae took the seat behind him, pulling it slightly closer. He was not going to leave Donghae's side and he had let his superiors understand that when the meeting was being set up. He squeezed Donghae's hand to encourage him.
"You are working for the underground mafia group the Lee Syndicate?" Another member of the board asked. "Tell us of your association with them."
“I worked for them.” Donghae corrected. “I was one of the advisors in the syndicate - a section head. I handled jobs that the boss gave me, mostly drug operations and money laundering. But that was before the boss gave the order to get torture me to get as much information about what I’d leaked to the police. If I didn’t squeak, then he said to kill me. He made it clear then that I was no longer part of the family.”
"And now you chose to turn on them?" The first member asked, jotting things down in a folder in front of him. Hyukjae sighed softly, staying still behind Donghae, quietly being his support.
"What is your relationship with Officer Lee Hyukjae? Have you exchanged information regarding any of our or the Lee Syndicates operations with him?"
Donghae gave them a wry grin. “My reason for turning on them is my relationship with Hyukjae. We’re lovers.” He paused, sighing. “Why I turned on them is because I know that if I don’t, I’m going to be hunted, and so is Hyukjae. And I can’t have that happening.”
There was a pause, then a frown from one of the board. “You haven’t answered our question. Have you exchanged information regarded any of ours or the Lee Syndicate operations with him?”
Donghae shook his head. “No. We were careful to keep work out of our discussions unless was necessary. The only time was when operations directly affected each other. However, any information we purely kept to ourselves, only using it if we needed to avoided confrontation. I…” Donghae trailed off, and for a moment, his eyes seemed to glaze a bit, unfocused.
Hyukjae looked at him when he paused, leaning in. "Donghae?" He whispered softly, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Hae?" He tried to bring him back to the present, ready to cancel the meeting right then and there.
The board members looked at Donghae. "Mr Lee?" One called out, still waiting for their answers.
But Donghae seemed to shake out of it then, blinking. “Oh sorry… uhmm… Oh. I never passed the information onto my boss or any of my subordinates. And from the way the police acted to our actions, I’d say Hyukjae never passed on the information either.”
Hyukjae kept looking at him with concerns as the interviewers continued to question him. "What information do you have for us Mr. Lee? Your laywer and Officer Lee have negotiated witness protection for you along with all charges dropped in exchange for your full cooperation." He explained to Donghae.
“Witness protection?” Donghae blinked, frowning, glancing at Hyukjae.
"It's the only way to make sure you stay safe... until the hearings and while you recover..." Hyukjae spoke to him. "And to keep an eye on you." He repeated his boss' words.
“But… what about… you…?” Donghae trailed off again, his eyes unfocusing.
Hyukjae looked around the board members watching them. "They won’t let me go with you. I have to stay behind and work on the case... plus it will be more dangerous if I go with you."
But Donghae didn’t seem to be responding, staring off into space.
One of the board members noticed Donghae’s lack of response. “Mr Lee? Mr Lee?”
"Donghae?!" Hyukjae got up out of his seat, kneeling in front of him. He patted his cheek gently, trying to get some form of response from him. "Call the paramedics!" He yelled out at the other people in the room.
But then, Donghae’s eyes focused again, and he blinked at Hyukjae. “Huh? What?”
"Donghae... you keep... you keep blanking out." Hyukjae told him gently, cupping his face. "Does your head hurt?"
“I do…?” Donghae blinked, shaking his head. “I don’t know… I feel a bit… wuzzy, but I figured it was just the effect of the drugs… It’s… I don’t know… a little hard to concentrate sometimes?”
Glancing over at the stitches on his head, Hyukjae frowned. "I've noticed... I think we should get you back home. This meeting is over." Hyukjae got up, putting his arms around him to help him up.
Donghae leaned against Hyukjae nodding, but he didn’t seem all that worried. But in fact, he was wondering why he wasn’t worried - he should be, but he didn’t seem to be able to bring together in his mind the panic and the thought that there might be something wrong with him.
“Wait! We haven’t gotten all the information we needed.” One of the interview board members protested.
"You can either interview him at my home or postpone this. He clearly isn't well enough to carry this on further. It would be worse if he gave out wrong information in his state." Hyukjae told off the interviewer. He held Donghae close, kissing his forehead as he began to lead him out of the room. "I think you just need a nice warm bath and I'll make you your favourite and you can nap a little..." Hyukjae told him gently.
Donghae nodded, smiling a little at the thought. “Mmm… that will be nice.”
They got the car with no problem, Hyukjae buckling him into the front seat. Leaning his head against the window he stared out of it. When Hyukjae got into the car he seemed to realize something. “Hyuk… you said you couldn’t follow me if I went under witness protection?”
Hyukjae began to drive them back towards their apartment, taking cuts he had used to take while they had still been a secret. He gripped his steering wheel and nodded. "I can't come with you."
"I won’t even know where you are."
Donghae let out a breath. “You didn’t tell me this earlier.” He said softly - both a question and an accusation.
"I'm sorry... I'm... I'm having a hard enough time remembering that I have to fix this now. It's my turn to take care of you and this... this was a hard decision. I knew if I had discussed with you that I would have immediately turned this down." Hyukjae tried to explain him. "I won't be able to live if something happens to you."
“…” Donghae was quiet for a moment. “I see the logic in this… but… what… what if I never see you again Hyuk? So many things could happen. You told me you were afraid to leave me, even just for a day. And truthfully, I am just as equally scared, although my hand is looser. But… we’re talking about years Hyuk.”
Hyukjae stopped the car as soon as they arrived in the parking garage of their apartment building. He reached over and took Donghae's hand. "I know you'd be safe... I don't know how I'll get by... but knowing you are safe.... it would help. I never want to leave your side but I don't know what else to do." Hyukjae looked at him.
“But… I won’t.” Donghae whispered, squeezing Hyuk’s hand back. “I won’t know if you’re safe. And if you’re going to be going against the Lee Syndicate… you won’t be.”
"If we don't finish this now they'll always be after us... after you." Hyukjae laced their fingers together. "I can't have that. The faster this is over, the faster we can be together."
Donghae swallowed, looking down at their laced fingers. “...Promise me. Promise me that we’ll see each other again. That you’ll come find me once everything is over.”
"I wouldn't want to be a moment without you that’s longer than necessary." Hyukjae promised him, before glaring. "And I swear to god, if for a moment.... you even look at someone else..." He shook his head, "I let it go while you worked for them but not anymore." His threatened Donghae, both serious and whiney.
Donghae laughed. “Oh no, no more of that. I can’t say I enjoyed it much anyway. You should give me a picture of you though, so I can jerk off in front of something.”
Hyukjae laughed, pulling him in for a kiss. "Or... I can take you home now and we can make a home movie for you to keep." Hyukjae nuzzled him.
“Even better.” Donghae murmured against Hyukjae’s lips.
Hyukjae smiled, kissing him again before pulling away. He continued to hold Donghae's hand as he finally drove them home, wanting to spend the evening making more memories for them to keep.
~*~
Donghae had been feeling a bit peckish. Not wanting to bother Hyukjae, especially since he was so busy at work nowadays, he decided to get his own food. He didn’t really want to waste money on delivery food either, so he decided that some instant ramyun was in order.
It wasn’t one of the best decisions he’d ever made.
Hyukjae stretched his arms as he finished reading yet another document, working on putting together all the evidence they had for their case. He got up from his chair and walked to the bedroom, hoping to find Donghae there. When he didn't Hyukjae began to search around the apartment until he reached the kitchen.
And a shock Hyukjae would get, for there stood Donghae in the kitchen, cooking his ramyun as he had intended. But the pot was boiling over, having been put over the fire too long, and Donghae was standing in front of it, chopsticks posed mid-stirring, a blank look on his face.
Hyukjae walked in, jumping into action immediate. He shut off the stove and pulling Donghae away immediately, not carrying about the chopsticks that fell to the floor. "Donghae!" He looked over the other, getting him way from the hot water and stove.
At the jolt, Donghae’s consciousness snapped back to reality, and he looked at Hyukjae in confusion. “Huh? What? Ow!” He winced, suddenly feeling the sharp burning pain in his hand.
Hyukjae gently took his hand, blowing at it softly. "Donghae." He said, voice strained. "Come..." He lead the other to the bedroom, getting out the first aid kit before sitting next to him.
Donghae didn’t argue, quietly following Hyukjae out. He sat down, watching as Hyukjae tended to his burn. “Hyuk... I’m sorry... I... I wasn’t thinking.”
They’d already established, after going back to the hospital for some checks, that Donghae had sustained some damage to his brain after the concussion. His brain synaptic pathways would fail to compute the electronic signals at times, as was the doctor’s explanation.
In other words, he would have episodes where he’d just zone out until someone or something snapped him out of it. The doctor also said that it would probably happen when he in the middle of complicated acts when his brain was working harder. Pushed too hard, his brain would be more likely to be unable to take the stress and shut down.
Whether this was permanent... the doctors still weren’t sure.
Hyukjae sighed and gently kissed his temple. "Could have called me to make you dinner." Hyukjae reminded him, applying cream to the burn and the bandaging it. "Still hungry?" He asked, giving him a smile. Hyukjae cupped his cheek, rubbing his thumb across it.
He had been trying to be as careful as he could with Donghae, relieving him of any stress he could manage too. Hyukjae wanted him to get better. He didn't want Donghae to suffer this any longer.
“Yeah...” Donghae sighed, closing his eyes. “I didn’t want to bother you because you were busy. I’m sorry... I just forgot.” He was used to doing things for Hyukjae, not the other way round, it was becoming frustrating, how he couldn’t do things that he used to without blanking out halfway and causing Hyukjae more problems than help.
Hyukjae shook his head, getting up, getting the kit away. "It's okay... it's never a bother." Hyukjae looked at him. "Want me to bring you dinner in bed?"
Donghae sighed, knowing Hyukjae would feel safer if he did. “Alright. I’ll just rest here, feeling a bit tired anyway.”
Hyukjae nodded, smiling before going to the kitchen. He quickly made Donghae's favourite, wanting to cheer was the other. Once he was done, he carefully put it all in a tray before carrying it to the other. "Hae." He called, smiling for him. "Dinner is here!"
Donghae sat up from where he was staring into space. Smiling he patted onto the bed. Knowing that Hyukjae probably made his favourite to try to cheer him up, and he didn’t want his bad mood to affect the other as well. “Feed me?” He asked cheekily.
Hyukjae laughed, sitting next to him. He checked to make sure Donghae was comfortable before picking up his chopsticks. "Ah, now I get to fulfill any motherly wishes I had." He half joked, preparing a bite and pressing it against Donghae's lips. "Say ah~"
That had hit a bit of a sore spot, but Donghae wasn’t the sort to pick on something that wasn’t intentional. Opening his mouth dutifully, he took the bite, chewing before opening his mouth again in the imitation of a baby bird. “Mama! Mama!”
Hyukjae poked his cheek. "Don't go overboard." He teased, feeding him some more. Hyukjae watched Donghae's face carefully, wishing he hadn't said that out loud. It really wasn't intentional. Hyukjae had always wanted kids. A dream that seemed to get pushed back at every stage of his life. From joining the police force to entering his dangerous lifestyle with Donghae. Not that it was anything he regretted.
When the food was finished, Donghae pulled Hyukjae into his arms, closing his eyes. “That was nice.” He murmured, pressing his lips against Hyukjae’s. Too bad he wasn’t really all himself at the moment.
Hyukjae pushed the tray away carefully, hugging him tightly. He didn't reply, choosing instead to lean against the other, letting him hold him like he used too before the incident when they'd be in bed. He didn't want Donghae to feel bad.
“I wish I could make love to you.” Donghae murmured. It hadn’t been wise to do so even though Donghae’s body had healed - with his mental state he’d probably pause halfway in the middle of sexual activity, and that would just be embarrassing. “At least once before I have to go.”
Hyukjae kisses his hand. "We'll get a chance." Hyukjae told him. "I promised you a day of anything you wanted before you had to go."
“Hmm... one whole day of sex does sound nice.” Donghae laughed, even as unfeasible as that was.
Hyukjae laughed, pecking him. "Let me nap in your arms? I missed doing that." He nuzzled him.
“Sure. Nap away.” Donghae held out his arms, a warm smile on his face.
Hyukjae snuggled against his chest, smiling. "Love you." He yawned, comfortable as always.
Donghae smiled, at that, kissing the top of Hyukjae’s head. “Love you too.” He whispered back.
And for that moment, everything was perfect.
If only it could have lasted forever.
~*~
“Are you sure the shipment was supposed to arrive yesterday.”
Donghae sighed for what he thought was the millionth time since the interview started. “Yes. The shipment was to arrive yesterday. That was the arrangement the last time I was in. But it’s highly likely they’d have changed it. They’d have guessed by now, especially after that successful raid, that I’ve told on them. They wouldn’t have moved it forward, because they’d know you have been watching. It’s more likely that they’d hope you get tired of watching. They can’t have shifted to another area, unless they managed to get an alliance with another family, which you said they haven’t. Last I knew it was a bit miffy in the underworld, with some hostilities between families, so it would be unwise to try to sneak this into another family’s area either.”
"We've gone over the maps you've shown us." Another officer spoke. "Of all their areas, marking the most likely ones. Point us the top three likely areas. We have to set up survallience there immediately." He poked as the maps were put up through a projector.
Hyukjae kept close to Donghae, holding his hand under the table, his eyes on the officers daring them to try and pressure Donghae with him around.
“There... there... and...” Donghae thought for a moment, rubbing his head. “There.”
“Alright... go call someone to get someone on watching those areas.” The officers stood up, getting into a flurry of activity. “We’ll have a short break, but once we’re done we’ll continue.”
Donghae sighed, leaning back and taking Hyukjae’s arm. “Man... they have a lot of questions don’t they?”
Hyukjae kissed his temple. "Are you feeling okay?" He asked, looking at the other carefully. "We'll get food if you are hungry." Hyukjae told him, gently running his fingers through his hair.
“Yeah. I’m fine. I’m just bored. “ Donghae grinned, patting Hyukjae’s cheek. “Wish they’d hurry up so we could go back and cuddle in bed.”
Hyukjae smiled at that. "Me too... It will be over soon. Another hour after the break. They promised. I won’t let them question you a second more."
“Mmm... I think I can handle another hour.” Donghae chuckled, then blinked when someone came over to them.
“Officer Lee, there’s a call for you. From the Lieutenant.”
Hyukjae sighed and nodded. "I'll be right back, Hae." He kissed him, not caring about who was watching them. Hyukjae had worked hard to earn respect from his co-workers. He had not time for those who thought less of him suddenly because of who he was in love with. He got up, giving Donghae another smile before following the messenger out.
Donghae smiled, when Hyukjae kissed him, winking at however might be watching, not caring about their judgemental stares. When Hyukjae left, he leaned back with a smile, thinking how he was so lucky having such a capable boyfriend like Hyukjae.
Unfortunately, that moment wasn’t to last.
“Alright, let’s start the next round.”
Blinking in surprise, Donghae sat back up, his eyes narrowing. “Hyukjae isn’t back yet.”
“No matter, I’m sure you can answer questions without him.” One of the officers said calmly, pressing forward. “Now, tell us. Who is the mole that the Lee Syndicate has planted into the facility?”
Donghae frowned at that. “I already told you. I don’t know.”
"You don't know? Are you withholding information from us... from what you tell us you were in the boss' good books. Perhaps this is all an act." The officer pressed on. "Maybe this is all an elaborate scheme to through us off your tracks. Tell, Mr Lee, are you using Officer Lee to acquire information and throw us off the tracks of the Lee Syndicate?"
Donghae’s lips thinned. “There are easier ways to throw you guys off the tracks. And stop questioning my relationship with Hyukjae. We’re lovers, fair and simple. I’ve told you that, he’s told you that. If you can’t trust me, at least trust him.”
"Is Officer Lee the Lee Syndicate mole?" Another officer spoke up, looking at Donghae.
Donghae’s eyes widened incredulously. “You can’t be serious.”
“Oh? Actually we are. It would make sense, since after all, the mole needs to come in constant contact with the Lee Syndicate, and you could be his contact point. The lover thing is just a cover in case he gets discovered.” The officer continued.
“Yes, and I suppose you’re going to say me getting tortured and shot was a scam too?” Donghae continued sarcastically. His eyebrows knitted together as he became more agitated, “Well, I’m sorry but even if that were true, what would be the point of me handing myself over to the police?”
“We don’t know. That’s what we’re trying to find out.”
Anger flared up in Donghae as he stood up, banging his hands on the table. “Of all the stupid things- ugh...”
Donghae suddenly winced, raising a hand to clutch at his head.
“And that mysterious condition of yours. Is it really a condition? Or is it just some ploy that you use to conveniently get out of any questions you can’t answer?” One of the officers came up, grabbing Donghae’s collar. “Hmm? Mr Lee?”
“Gah...” Donghae couldn’t even answer, couldn’t even hear the question. His head was ringing with pain, alarm bells in his body going off. “Noisy... So... noisy... S-shut up...”
It was at the same time Hyukjae was returning from a very strange and confusing phone call from his boss. He was frowning as he got back to the room only to notice Donghae and his pain right away. "Hae?!" He called out, rushing to his side immediately. His anger flaring as he noticed one of the interviewer’s eyes roll. He kneeled in front of his boyfriend, cupping his face. "Donghae?"
But Donghae couldn’t hear Hyukjae, the pain in his head was too much, and he just wanted it all to go away...
Stiffening in Hyukjae’s hold, Donghae’s eyes glazed, his mind shutting down on itself.
“Tch. How convenient.” The officer who had grabbed Donghae spat out sarcastically. “I guess we have to cancel the interview because he’s not well enough. Tch. This is probably just an act.”
Hyukjae would have turned around to punch that officer in the face but Donghae's well being was more important. He pulled out his phone, calling for an ambulance immediately. "Donghae.... please, Hae." He patted the other’s cheek, trying to get him to answer.
But unlike previous times, Donghae didn’t snap out of it. He remained in that blanked out state despite Hyukjae’s attempts to get his attention.
Hyukjae was growing more worried. It would take at least five minutes for the paramedics to arrive. He got up, sitting besides Donghae as he pulled him into his arm. "What did you ask him?!" He glared at his superiors.
“That’s classified information.” One of the officers said evasively. There had been a reason why they’d set up Hyukjae to leave Donghae alone for a while in the interview.
Hyukjae snorted at that. "Low attempt at getting me out of here... I knew that phone call was too suspicious and too convenient." Hyukjae spat. He gently cradled Donghae in his arm.
It didn't take much longer for the paramedics to barge in and finally get Donghae on a stretcher. Hyukjae followed him without sparing a glance to his superiors.
~*~
“He’s regained consciousness, but he’s just been through a lot of stress, don’t do anything to agitate him, alright?”
Hyukjae nodded, glancing through the window at Donghae. "I'll just take him his lunch." Hyukjae thanked the doctor, holding a bag of Donghae's favourite take away, walking into the room. "Hae?" He smiled, holding up the bag for him to see.
Donghae had been staring out the window, a strange expression on his face. When Hyukjae came in, he turned, staring for a moment before a lopsided smile came onto his face. “Hey... you bought a happy meal. My favourite.” But despite the smile, there wasn’t the usual childish excitement on his face when Hyukjae tried to do something sweet for him like this.
Hyukjae noticed the lack of.... Donghae, in the other. He walked over anyway, sitting down next to him. "They had that toy you wanted." Hyukjae pulled the table to them, putting the bag down. He took out everything from the bag, setting it up just the way Donghae liked it before handing him the toy. "Can I feed you?"
Donghae picked up the toy, staring at it for a while. Normally, he’d have already torn the plastic open in excitement, annoying Hyukjae with his excited cooing. But he only played with it in his hands, before quickly putting it back down. He sighed, looking away from Hyukjae. “I’m sorry, Hyuk...” He said softly. “Thanks for the food... but I’m not hungry.”
Hyukjae put down the fries he was holding, reaching out to put his hands over Donghae’s instead. "Talk to me." Hyukjae asked him. "What’s bothering you?"
Donghae kept quiet for a while, but he didn’t pull away from Hyukjae’s hands. Finally, he whispered. “... Everything...”
Hyukjae pushed the tray away again. "I'm scared." He admitted. "So much can go wrong and not just with this operation but... I don't want to leave you alone for even a moment."
“It’s not just that... it’s me as well.” Donghae seemed to struggle with his words for a moment. “I... This condition. Hyuk... I can’t even do anything by myself. If I cook something, I’ll probably burn myself. If I carry something, I’d mostly likely drop it. Sometimes I even catch myself blanking out in the middle of peeing.” He paused then, his voice choking up. “And today... it hurt so much. And I was out for so long... Hyuk... what if I’m getting worse? What if next time I can’t even walk? What if I can’t even see? And you’re right there but I can’t even see you? Hear you? Feel you? I’d rather die...”
"No!" Hyukjae snapped but quickly controlled himself. He sighed, shutting his eyes to calm himself. "Don't say such things... please." He looked at him. "I can't... I spent too long wondering if you were dead or alive already and I can't deal with this. You'll get better. You have too." Hyukjae looked at him pleadingly.
“I... I don’t know Hyuk. I don’t know if I can...” Donghae finally looked up, the tears clear in his eyes. “I’m so scared. I don’t know if I can keep my promise anymore, Hyuk...”
"Donghae we shouldn't be having this conversation right now. Doctor says not to agitate you." Hyukjae's voice was softer than usual, obviously hurt by Donghae's words. He squeezed his hand. "Please eat, you didn't have much at breakfast either. We can go home after this..."
Donghae was trembling, even as Hyukjae squeezed his hand. He knew he was being selfish - he was already giving Hyukjae so much trouble. But he... he just didn’t know. He was so scared... and so tired... “I’m sorry... I’m really not hungry.”
Then looking up, he whispered. “Can we... can we just... lie together in bed instead?”
Hyukjae nodded, quietly getting up and moving into bed with him. He slipped under the small blanket and cuddled Donghae, holding him like he was holding onto a life line.
Donghae buried his face into Hyukjae’s chest, unable to stop the tears. Weeks of pent-up stress and trying to carry on with life like everything was okay had finally taken its toll. He didn’t want to lose Hyukjae - not to the Lee Syndicate, not through separation, and certainly not because of his condition. But they were all closing on all sides, and Donghae felt like he was trapped with nowhere to go. “Please... I don’t want to leave you, Hyuk... I don’t...” He sobbed, fingers clutching the fabric of Hyukjae’s shirt.
Hyukjae held him closer and as tight as he could. He rubbed his back, letting Donghae cry for a bit. He hadn't all this while. "I don't want to leave you either." He whispered softly, trying to sooth him.
Donghae didn’t reply to that, sobbing softly in Hyukjae’s arms... and slowly, he drifted off to sleep, exhausted.
Hyukjae pulled the blankets over them, keeping Donghae in his arms as he slept. It wasn't until he was sure that Donghae wasn't going to wake up that he let his own tears fall before soon falling asleep as well.
~*~