black is the colour of my true love's hair
How you can tell you're reading a story by eleveninches:
1. Even the gen fics are pretty damn gay.
2. The main character is put into an unusual situation that makes him or her feel as if the entire world has gone mad.
3. The plots revolve around the characters finding insane ways to resolve an insane problem.
4. There's no smut, except for that one time, and we don't talk about that.
5. The story is 90% dialogue.
Wow, that was actually sort of depressing. This is just like the other day when I was complaining, "I wish I could write stories that were totally deep and shit."
Canadian elections are on Monday. I don't know about you guys, but everyone I know in my little part of western Canada is voting NDP, which cracks me up, because everyone's like, "I can't stand Layton, but I'll eat my own arm before voting Conservative."
So, uh, in the continuing trend of my fandom-related mental illness, I've written yet more SGA fic. This is based on something I think font said during the latest ep, which is, "Teyla/Michael is so Buffy/Angel." Only this isn't a crossover (praise Allah), just crackfic.
This contains serious spoilers for episode 2x18, 'Michael', which was the ep most recently aired in Canada. I have no idea what the US schedule is for SGA, but I know it's behind the Canadian one.
A Wraith By Any Other Name by eleveninches
Summary: Teyla don't want no drama. A week in the life of Teyla Emmagan after Michael. Not AU, but won't follow canon by the time the 2x19 hits.
Teyla/Michael, Teyla/Ronon (sort of), Sheppard/McKay, Lorne/his ego.
Day 1
A week after Teyla Emmagan was kidnapped by the Wraith-turned-human-turned-Wraith, she had a nightmare. One would think that, given her lifestyle, she would've spent every night with nightmares. But in reality, she was just so used to everything that being terrified wasn't even her first reaction anymore. Now it was confusion mixed with anger, and maybe a little worry. But in the end, mostly confusion, because she hadn't realized how strange the universe was before she moved to Atlantis.
In her nightmare, she was stalked by someone as she walked from the control room to her apartments. Her heart was cold, and there were goosebumps on her arms, but when she turned around, it wasn't a Wraith; it was John.
"I love you," John said.
She screamed and took off running.
At the other end of the hall, a door opened, and Michael stepped out. But he wasn't like she'd ever seen him; he was completely Wraith now, blue skin, long, white hair. He bared his fangs at her and spread his arms wide.
"I love you," he said.
She threw herself into his embrace, intent on kissing his cold, slimy lips, and that's when she woke up, clenching her bedsheets in her hands, heart pounding like when she was young and they used to make a game of seeing who could make it farthest into the old city before panicking. (She had always won.)
The next day, she sat through three hours of Elizabeth, Lorne, Rodney, and John fighting over the best way to either save or destroy the city, which Teyla, exhausted by this point, thought sounded familiar. Normally, the way John and Rodney bickered would amuse her, or Elizabeth would say something that would make her think, or Rodney would just say something completely offensive, but Teyla felt sluggish and distant, like everything was under water. Ronon wasn't making eye contact with her either, and usually his "what the hell's going on?" looks made things a little less boring.
At one point, she caught John staring at her, and her stomach lurched, but then she realized he was just checking out his hair in the tinted glass behind her.
"Teyla?" Elizabeth asked, her tone a little sharper than usual. They were all stressed. "Teyla, are you listening?"
"Um, yes," she said, shaking herself back into focus. "I am sorry, I was thinking of... battle tactics."
Elizabeth gave her a look that said she knew Teyla was lying, but she didn't comment on it.
Afterwords -- Teyla didn't remember much of what had happened, although later she vaguely recalled offering her people for backup again, and Lorne looking pleased rather than angry, unlike Bates had last year -- she took a long, hot bath, meditated for two hours, and then crushed the egos of several Marines using her fighting sticks. Ronon lurked outside the gym, but she pretended she didn't see him.
***
"Hey, Teyla, wait up!"
She stiffened at John's voice, but slowed down so he could catch up with her as she left the gym (and four very sore, sorry Marines) behind. It wasn't his fault he was in her horrible dream. Or that she really didn't want to sleep with him. Certainly, she'd been attracted to him once, long ago, but that was before she'd actually gotten to know him. John charmed people easily, in a way that made optimistic people feel he only had eyes for them, and pessimistic ones to wonder if he also flirted with his mirror, his gun, and his hairbrush, just to keep in practice. Teyla knew him well enough to know his cocky smirks and weird eyebrow waggles were just how he behaved all the time.
"You feeling better?" he asked, expression serious. "You seemed kind of out of it earlier."
She didn't know what "it" was, but she knew better than to ask. And she really, really didn't want to have this conversation. "I am fine. I am just worried about our current Wraith dilemma."
He nodded. "You'd tell me if you were having weird dreams again, right? Because you have that death-warmed-over kind of look right now. You've been acting weird ever since..." John made a gesture that didn't make any sense to her. She assumed he meant Michael. "We're worried about you."
"'We' are?" she asked, narrowing her eyes, trying to figure out if he was coming on to her.
He didn't seem to notice. "Yeah," he said, "I think Ronon feels bad for what happened. Or he's hungry. He's hard to read sometimes."
"I promise I will tell you if something happens," she lied, "but for now I really am fine."
They arrived at the door to her apartment. John gave her a strong clap on the shoulder, said, "See you later," and walked off.
She frowned at his retreating form. Then she sighed and looked back. "You can come out now, Ronon."
Ronon poked his head out from around the corner. "Sheppard's a filthy liar," he growled. "I don't feel bad about anything."
"He is just trying to help in his own way," she said.
"Yeah, well." He crossed his huge arms over his equally huge chest. "He's right, you look like crap. What's going on? Need me to kill someone for you?"
She and Ronon had a... She hated to call it a connection, because he wasn't one of her people, and they hadn't really known each other that long, but that's what it was. Atlantis was full of people from a different galaxy, but they were the ones that were considered different.
"I had a dream Colonel Sheppard said he loved me," she started. She didn't think Ronon was ready to hear about the other half of the dream. She was barely ready for the other half. "It has made me worried he has feeling for me. Feelings that I do not return."
Ronon looked shocked, then blank, then angry. Then back to blank. "I think Sheppard might be seeing someone, actually."
"Really?" John hadn't mentioned anything about that. Of course, he never talked about anyone he was interested in. "He told you this?"
He shrugged. "No, but I heard Lorne call Sheppard a 'homo.' I think it's their slang for a guy who has a lot of women. I heard Caldwell call him that once too."
Teyla went inside very relieved, but also wondering why John would tell the Marines information about his love life before he would tell her, Ronon, and Rodney. But then she remembered John was a very silly person, and she pushed it out of her mind.
***
At first she tried to sleep, but all she could think was, what if her dream came back? What if she finished it this time? There were only two ways for it to go -- death or sex -- and both were disturbing. When she was a child and had nightmares, her father had sing her to sleep, and after he was Culled, her dreams of being taken were replaced with ones of her killing as many Wraith she could get her hands on. Those hadn't exactly woken her up in terror.
There was only so much meditation even Teyla could do in one day, so she decided to take a walk. Without paying attention to where she was going, she found herself wandering towards the gym again, where only a week before she'd sparred with Michael, where she'd felt his muscular body under her fists, where he'd laughed and smiled and trusted her and told her he was afraid of himself.
She was almost there when from behind her came footsteps, and she tensed, remembering her dream. Maybe, like last year, it had been telling her something. She hoped that when she turned around it was a Wraith and not John, because she at least she didn't have to see the Wraith every day, and she could stab a Wraith in the face without worrying if it would hurt its feelings.
She slowed down her pace until the figure was right behind her. Moving swiftly, she grabbed the body and slammed it against the wall with one hand, and with the other, pulled out the knife she kept hidden the back of her pants. She aimed towards the face--
"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!"
Teyla faltered, and her knife hit the wall. Heart slamming against her ribs, she thought, I almost--
"Are you psychotic?" Major Lorne demanded, and she let go of him. He slid down the wall, touching his neck gingerly. "I wasn't even sneaking around."
"I am sorry," she said, trying to calm down. "I thought you were a Wraith."
"Yeah, I can see how you'd make that mistake," he snapped.
She sucked in a sharp breath through her nose, biting back her anger. "Why are you wandering the halls so--"
Then she took in his pants (she'd been told they were "sweatpants" by some, "track bottoms" by others), his sweat-stained t-shirt that said "Bob Jones University," and his giant orange ball tucked under his arm. He really wasn't much taller than her. It was strange being able to glare head-on instead of looking up.
"I am sorry," she repeated, flushing. Of course Lorne was just outside playing his bouncing ball game. "I am going to head back to my rooms now."
"You're never eating at the cool table again," she heard him mutter as she rounded the corner.
First Bates, now Lorne. It seemed she had bad luck when it came to John's second-in-commands. At least Bates hadn't been someone she'd already respected before he'd decided she was the root of all their problems.
She locked her door behind her, kicked off her boots, and started to peel off her shirt.
Someone behind her coughed.
Gasping, she spun around, once more unsheathing her knife.
It was Michael -- but not Michael-the-Wraith. It was Michael-the-human, with his messy blond hair and his warm, shaky smile, standing in front of her open window. Teyla's voice caught in her throat, but she held the knife tight.
"Teyla," he said, taking a step closer.
"Do not come near me," she managed, spreading her legs to a fighting stance. She drew the knife in a line with his throat. She could absolutely kill him if she had to. She could. "What are you doing here? Why do you look--" 'Normal' was probably not the best word to use here. "Human?"
He shifted, looking uncomfortable. Something brushed against her mind, and she knew suddenly that he was afraid and worried, but not for himself. He was still a Wraith, and she was sensing his emotions.
"I don't know. It must be a side-effect from the retrovirus. I can change back and forth just by thinking about it." He chuckled darkly. "It was really useful for getting into the city undetected."
She swallowed thickly. "Why did you come back here?"
"Hive Ships are on their way to Atlantis," said Michael.
"Yes, we know," Teyla replied.
He actually looked taken aback. "Oh. Yeah, I guess you would."
Michael just stood there, staring at her. She sensed that when he looked at her, he felt something that confused him. She knew exactly how he felt (and not just because they had an empathic Wraith connection); she should've felt a lot more scared -- there was a Wraith in her room and all she had was a knife -- but it was Michael. He was everything she hated, but she understood him. She was part-Wraith, he was part-Wraith. She knew what it was like to know there was something different and wrong about you. In their final meeting, she knew he hadn't wanted to feed off her, just like he hadn't wanted to kill that Marine, but the Wraith inside had taken over. And despite that she'd known the whole time he was evil, she'd still felt drawn to him.
"Why are you telling me this?" she asked.
He looked away, face covered in shadows. "Because I care about you."
"You tried to eat me on the planet," she said.
He grimaced. "Out of love? Besides, you offered yourself to me."
"It was not like that," she sniffed.
Michael grinned like she'd just told him she loved him. But then it faded, and he looked pale and bleak and-- hot.
"If I asked to see you as a true Wraith, would you attack me?" she asked hesitantly.
He frowned thoughtfully and said, "No, I don't think so. I behave the same in both forms."
His features shifted: face lengthening, skin darkening, hair whitening. When he was completely Wraith, he put his hands on his hips and said, "How do I look?"
"I am strangely attracted to you," Teyla admitted, hating herself.
Michael beamed a pointy smile.
***
Over the course of her life, Teyla had considered herself a woman, a daughter, a warrior, and a leader, but this was the first time she wondered if she was an idiot. She had told Michael she couldn't trust him, and he'd promised her information, schematics, anything she wanted, if it would make her believe him. Then she'd made him sleep in her bathtub while she spent the rest of the night pacing and trying not to tear out her hair (although that was mostly because it took Corporal Smitty two hours to blowdry it once a week).
When the sun started to rise, the door to her bathroom opened. Teyla looked up from her position on the floor, where she was sitting with her forehead pressed against her knees.
Michael knelt beside her. She wrapped one hand around the handle of the gun lying next to her. "You're anxious."
"Imagine if you were hiding me on a Hive Ship," she said. "And then imagine I could kill you at any second."
His face darkened. "I told you," he said quietly, "I'm here because I care about you. I know you feel this connection between us. I knew from the second we met that we were meant to be together."
"What you felt was the mind link between us," she said firmly. "I am able to touch the minds of the Wraith."
Michael shook his head. "Then why didn't I want to feed off you? Why couldn't I stop thinking about you, even after I was on a Hive Ship?" He jumped to his feet and scrubbed his face with his hands. She felt a thousand things at once -- anger, excitement, sadness -- but she didn't know if they were her emotions or his. "Don't you see, Teyla? I thought that when I went back, everything would be just how I left it. That I'd go back to wanting nothing more than to feed off humans. But I didn't feel the same anymore; when I looked around me, all I saw were monsters. I wanted to come back here more than anything. The retrovirus changed more than just my body. I'm neither Wraith nor human now."
It sounded too good to be true. Teyla was hit with a sudden rush of anger. "How can I trust you?" she demanded hotly. "Last time you said you knew you were a Wraith through and through."
"I--" He stopped, brightening. "I'll show you I mean it. Read my mind."
"No," she said.
"Teyla," he pleaded, "let me-- let me prove it to you."
His eyes were big and blue, and his handsome face was so eager, and she remembered how horrified he'd been when he discovered the truth about himself.
Hesitantly, she took his hand -- his smooth, warm, perfectly human hand -- in his, and she closed her eyes.
***
Day 2
"You ever had an orgy in front of aliens?" Lorne asked, finishing the last of his noodles.
John looked up from where he was doodling a puddlejumper on his paper napkin. "Yeah, once or twice." Lorne's eyes widened. "What, haven't you?"
"No," Lorne said.
"Of course not," John sighed.
Teyla dropped into the empty seat beside Lorne, who abruptly picked up his tray and left, tossing a glare over his shoulder.
"What's that about?" John asked, watching as Lorne dumped his tray and stormed off.
"He thinks I am insane," Teyla said casually. "Listen, I have something important to tell you."
John frowned. "What's going on?"
Teyla's eyes darted back and forth, probably making sure no one was going walk by and overhear them. He hadn't seen her this wound up since she'd been on Ford's superhero enzyme. "It is really horrible. You will probably want to remove me from the team. Or worse." She bit her lip. "You will probably want to stop being my friend."
Okay, this was weird. "I promise that, short of killing someone, that won't happen. And even if you did kill someone, we'd probably all agree it was the right thing to do."
She took a deep breath and straighened her shoulders. "I lied to you earlier. I have been having dreams lately. But they have been of Michael coming back to Atlantis. And last night--" She leaned forward. "Why are you writing 'Lieutenant Colonel Sheppard-McKay'?" She snatched his napkin before he had a chance to even react. He'd forgotten she knew how to read. Stupid Elizabeth and her stupid "a book is a gift you can open again and again" campaign. "'John Sheppard-McKay, Mr John McKay, Mr and Dr McKay'?"
"It's a joke," he said quickly, grabbing the napkin back, shredding it into tiny pieces, and then eating it. "And keep your voice down, will you?"
Her eyes were huge. "I thought you were a homo."
He choked on paper bits. "How do you even know that word?"
"Ronon told me it is a name for a man who courts many women," she said, looking and sounding baffled. "Is that not correct?"
"No. God. It means 'homosexual.' As in, a guy who has sex with other guys."
She stared at him. He stared back. Slowly, she said, "Oh. I see. Now I do not feel so bad about what I have to tell you."
"Yeah?" he asked.
Teyla smiled. "Michael and I have decided to give our relationship a chance."
"Michael the Wraith?"
"He has declared his love for me," she said stiffly.
John started to get up, fumbling for his handgun. "Oh my God, he's in Atlantis, isn't he."
She grabbed his arm roughly and pulled him back down. A few people looked up when his arm slammed against the table. "I trust him. I have been in his mind, and I know he is telling the truth. He came here because he did not want to see me die."
"He kidnapped you and tried to feed off you," he hissed, wrenching out of her grasp.
"He said he was sorry," she insisted.
"This is nuts," John said. "I don't care how much this Wraith loves you, he's still a Wraith. You can't just let him wander the halls. What about when he gets hungry? Remember Ellia?"
She stood. "Come with me."
If he was a man of better judgement, he probably wouldn't have followed her to her rooms, where a very human Michael was sitting on an Athosian pillow chair-type thing, reading a book. How the hell did a Wraith know how to read? Did their freaky sex slaves also serve as tutors?
Ronon and Rodney were going to freak out. No, actually, Rodney would freak out; Ronon would just go homicidal. People were going to end up dead because of this.
"You owe me a cowboy hat," John said, looming over Michael, one hand on his thigh holster.
Michael looked at him blankly. "I didn't take it with me."
"You tore it into shreds when you were having your post-discovery freak out."
"Here, I'll buy you a new one at the Wraith country-western store with my Wraith money," Michael said sarcastically.
John grabbed him by the shoulders and hauled him up against the wall. Michael let out a cry of surprise, and John shoved his gun under the Wraith's -- man's, whatever -- nose. "John," Teyla shouted, as John demanded, "How did you get here? What do you want?"
Michael's eyes flickered to Teyla.
The next thing John knew, Teyla was twisting his arm behind his back and dragging him out to the corridor. John struggled, but she didn't let go. This was possibly the first time he'd ever hated that she was freakishly strong.
"I cannot believe you," she snarled at him.
"You're making a huge mistake," John yelled, spinning around to face her.
"He is still Michael," Teyla said, as if that explained everything. "He is still my friend. Haven't you ever found a Wraith... attractive?"
"I'm not attracted to fish," John said. "Especially ones that want to eat my soul."
Her eyes narrowed. "And yet you are attracted to Dr McKay, who, I believe, is not considered coventionally attractive."
He sputtered. Rodney was hot, dammit. "At least the guy I'm sleeping with doesn't want to eat me."
A passing Marine, and God, John knew him, he hung out with Cadman, shot John a strange look.
"I need you to trust me," she said.
"I'm not a trusting guy," he replied, crossing his arms over his chest.
She got that look on her face that told him she was about to mention, again, how he let Rodney blow up a solar system.
"Do you even know what you're going to do with him?" he asked. "You can't just let him stay in your room."
Teyla lowered her eyes. "I have not yet decided. I need time. But I cannot let him go back to a people he despises."
"I thought he despised us," John said.
"I read--"
"Yeah, yeah, you read his mind. You told me." He sighed. He was probably making the worst decision of his life. Which said a lot, because most of his life was characterized by bad choices. "What do you want me to do?"
"Promise me you will not tell anyone," she said.
***
"There's a Wraith in the city," Ronon said.
John stumbled over his own two feet as they walked down the corridor. Rodney started looking around wildly, like it would just pop out right in front of them. "What? Here? Again? You're sure? We've got to tell Elizabeth. Someone give me a gun. Oh God, what am I talking about, I can't hit anyone with a gun!"
"There aren't any Wraith here," John growled. "Stop trying to scare McKay, Ronon."
Ronon shook his head. His dreads actually made noise when he did that, although that was probably just the knives. "I'm serious. Something feels weird."
Rodney spoke into his headset, "Chuck, can you check for any strange life sign signals in the city? Yes, I'm serious. I don't know, maybe someone alone in an isolated area. Oh really? You won't be saying I'm paranoid when I outlive you all, will you?" He looked back at them. "Well, if there's a Wraith in Atlantis, it's hiding in plain sight. Which is actually really disturbing."
"There is no Wraith," John said loudly. When everyone else found out about Michael, he was going to be so screwed.
***
Day 3
The heads of the city, plus Teyla and Ronon, had been having daily meetings where they tried to come up with a defense strategy. So far all their allies with actual weapons had turned down their plea for help, and all their allies without technology had offered manpower. It was incredibly frustrating. Even Colonel Caldwell had admitted that the Daedalus would most likely not make it through the upcoming battle alone.
"You can't possibly be serious!" McKay shouted, waving his arms. "Do you even listen to yourself speak?"
"It's not like they're people," Colonel Caldwell snapped, audibly grounding his teeth together.
"I'm pretty sure they are," John said.
"They're goats. And you said yourself they can make themselves internally combust."
Rodney flailed. "Alien goats. Sentient goats. They build houses made of straw!"
"They sang us songs and told me my hair was pretty," said Ronon.
Elizabeth cleared her throat. "Unfortunately, Colonel, I agree with Rodney. We can't ask a group of people to be suicide bombers for us, no matter how... goat-like they seem."
Caldwell grumbled under his breath, but he didn't protest.
Teyla felt this was her chance to speak up. "I have some news that may be able to help us," she said. "A friend has brought me information concerning the Hive Ships." Everyone looked at her with bright eyes, except for John, who eyed her suspiciously. "I have been given the location of three sets of fleets. I believe they are all on their way to Atlantis."
"Great," said McKay, "this is just how I wanted to start my day, knowing that we're all completely screwed."
"Thank you, Teyla," Elizabeth said diplomatically. "At least now we know what we're up against. Rodney, John, neither of you have any ideas on how--?"
"I am not done yet," Teyla said, holding up a finger in a gesture she'd seen Rodney use many times.
Elizabeth's eyebrows arched. "Please."
"I have also been told that one of the fleets is on its way to Cull a planet with a small population before heading directly here. My friend believes that if we were to help the people of this planet escape, the Wraith's hunger might cause them to behave recklessly in battle. Perhaps it might even drive them to attack each other."
Elizabeth's mouth dropped open, but Colonel Caldwell leaned forward and asked, "And did this friend happen to mention how we're supposed to hide an entire planet from the Wraith?"
"Couldn't the Daedalus move the people to another planet?" Ronon asked. Teyla was absurdly relieved to have his support.
"No," Caldwell snapped.
Ronon scowled. "I remember it being a pretty big ship."
Caldwell sneered back. "What if it's a trap? The Wraith could be trying to get the Daedalus away from Atlantis."
"It is not a trap," she said coldly.
She wanted to tell him exactly how she knew the information was true. She wanted to tell all of them. But she knew they'd hunt down Michael and maybe even kick her out of the city, and then what would she have? She'd grown too accustomed to her life in Atlantis, a life that she loved.
"I think we should follow Teyla's plan," John said. He was slouched over and not meeting her eyes, but his mouth was set in a determined line.
Elizabeth nodded slowly. "It's the best plan we have as of yet. Colonel Caldwell?"
Caldwell's eye twitched.
Afterwords, Teyla caught up with John. "Thank you for believing in me."
He looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "You really have feelings for this guy?" he asked, still sounding incredulous.
"Yes, I believe so," she said honestly, remembering how the night before he'd held her hand and told her he didn't know how to live without her.
John's brow furrowed. "On one hand, I'm happy for you, but on the other, we are totally going to die."
***
Day 4
The Daedalus managed to get every single person off of the planet. Teyla wasn't the type to gloat, but it was nice hearing Caldwell telling Elizabeth, "That was probably a good idea," and, "Your people aren't always idiots," and, "I will totally take you back to Earth if you want to run away together." John had been pleased, too, and he stopped looking at her like she'd betrayed them.
That night, Michael ate a chicken sandwich like a human would, and then showed her a Wraith dance that involved a lot of ass shaking and arm waving. "We aren't a graceful people," he grunted, rocking back and forth, arms above his head. Teyla laughed until her stomach hurt.
***
Day 5
Halling hummed to himself while stitching two pieces of leather together. The thing on the table was starting to resemble a small boot, probably for Jinto, who was growing at an almost alarming rate. At the pace he was going, in a few years he'd probably be as tall as Ronon. Teyla watched as Halling's steady fingers moved back and forth over the material. It was nice being back in an Athosian home.
"Do you believe that all the Wraith are evil?" she asked suddenly.
"What brings this on?" he replied, pausing mid-motion.
She looked away, embarrassed. "I am just curious."
Halling put the needles down, gazing at her thoughtfully. "There is an old story, back from the days of the first Cullings. It is said there was a Wraith who did not want to feed off humans, and he took refuge in the woods. Eventually, he befriended a young woman, who claimed to everyone he would not harm them."
"What happened to them?"
He gazed at her evenly. "The Wraith killed her. According to the story, once he experienced a moment of perfect happiness, the Wraith inside him, who he truly was, took over. He managed to kill several more villagers before they got to him."
A shiver ran down her spine. "Do you know what this-- this 'perfect happiness' was?"
"No one knows." He smiled and patted her hand. "But it is just a silly story to scare children. Do not think about it."
***
Every time Ronon finished a book, Elizabeth rewarded him by allowing him to play with something cool and Ancient (unless it was a weapon or something that McKay and Zelenka had frequently told her no one was allowed to touch, although most of the time Ronon thought they just didn't want anyone discovering something new before they did). Last week, Dr Simpson had let him float around in the zero-gravity room, which had been fun, although he'd been so queasy he'd barely been able to eat dinner that night. Today Ronon had finished Curious George Goes to the Zoo, so Chuck let him play with the control room sensors, which actually wasn't as fun as it sounded.
He flipped through a few screens, counting how many people were in the mess, the labs, the barracks, and the gym. Then he changed over to the residential areas, because it'd be funny to see how many people were slacking off to get laid. That's when he saw something that made him freeze.
He found Sheppard on his way to the labs. "Hey, Sheppard."
John waited for him to catch up. "What's up?"
"Someone's in Teyla's room," Ronon said quietly.
"Maybe it's... Teyla," Sheppard said, widening his eyes comically.
He shook his head. "She's on the mainland. You can get in the doors, right, with your gene?"
Without waiting for an answer, he headed for the transporter. Sheppard followed at his heels, calling, "Wait, wait, wait!" As soon as the doors closed around them, Sheppard said, "Look, it's, um, it's her boyfriend."
Ronon went cold all over. They didn't have this word on Sateda, but he'd heard it enough in Atlantis to know what it meant. "Boyfriend?"
"She didn't want you to know," Sheppard continued.
"Is it one of your Marines?" Ronon asked. He felt like breaking something. Preferably Teyla's boyfriend.
"Yes," John said, a little too earnestly.
Ronon chewed on that for a moment. "What's his name?"
"Uh."
"Is it you?" Ronon took a step forward. He'd never felt so betrayed in his life. That time Sateda was destroyed was nothing. Sheppard was such a traitor.
Sheppard's head snapped up. "I'm not the intergalactic playboy everyone seems to think I am."
"I don't know what that means," Ronon said.
"It means 'no,'" Sheppard replied, sounding annoyed. "Besides, he's in her room, and I'm standing here talking to you."
"But you know who he is."
Ronon stalked out of the transporter, heading straight for Teyla's apartments. The hallway was blissfully empty, which meant he wouldn't have to worry about which direction he shot in.
"It's a complicated situation," Sheppard said, running to match Ronon's brisk stride. "She didn't want you to know for a reason."
"Is it because she wants me?" Ronon asked. Sheppard cringed. "Didn't think so. Open the door."
Sheppard didn't move. One corner of his mouth turned downwards. "There's something else. It's Michael."
Ronon's mind went horribly blank for a second. "The Wraith?"
"Yeah."
"I'll kill him with my bare hands," Ronon said, shaking with rage. He fumbled around his pants -- why had he let the Atlantians give him such big pants? he never had this problem before -- for his gun.
Sheppard grabbed his shoulder. Not that it would have stopped him, considering their height difference. "Hold on, maybe she's right about this. Have you known her to be wrong before?"
"What?" Ronon demanded.
"Besides," Sheppard said, not looking at him, "she can't help who she falls in love with."
Ronon grit his teeth so hard a jolt of pain shot up his face. "I can't believe you-- you-- Oh no, I see what this is about! You hooked up with McKay!"
"This has nothing to do with me or McKay," Sheppard protested.
"Both you and Teyla are sick in the head," Ronon said.
Sheppard heaved a sigh. "Yeah."
Ronon gestured to the door with his gun. "Open it." Again, Sheppard didn't move, but he screwed up his face like he was thinking hard. "You know we have to kill him. Teyla will be mad for a while, but she'll understand eventually."
Sheppard seemed torn. "I think we should wait for Teyla first. For now, stand down."
Ronon's fist slammed on the door, hard. His wrist throbbed in pain, but it wasn't as strong as the rage clawing up his throat. "Open up, Wraith," he shouted.
"I'm ordering you to stand down," Sheppard snapped.
He wasn't taking orders this time. Not when Sheppard was so wrong. "Open the door," he growled, this time to Sheppard.
"Ronon?"
He spun around. Teyla was standing there, hands on her hips, looking pissed off.
"What do you think you are doing?" she questioned icily.
"Saving your life," he said.
She stepped forward, hissing, "You do not understand the situation. Michael is both a human and a Wraith, and you cannot kill him for being what we made him. He knows feeding off people is wrong."
"So did that little girl who turned into a bug," Ronon pointed out. "Didn't stop her."
"Ronon," she said softly. She tilted her chin, a determined expression on her face. "I love him."
They stared at each other. Out of the corner of his eye, Ronon noticed Sheppard starting to back away slowly. "Uh, this seems like a private moment." Neither of them acknowledged him, and he hurried off.
Teyla was so beautiful, with her brown skin and her dark eyes and her breasts he'd been told not to stare at, and Ronon was going to break down the door and kill the Wraith right fucking now for putting his filthy hands on her.
"Would you love me if I was a Wraith?" Ronon asked.
She winced. "I have been considering making myself an appointment with Dr Heightmeyer."
***
Day 6
"Oh God, we're so screwed," Rodney moaned when the people of Fenth tossed Teyla into the cell with him.
She sat up quickly, checking herself over for broken bones. When she was certain she was okay, she assured him, "Colonel Sheppard and Ronon will rescue us."
Well, John would, at least. Ronon hadn't spoken to her since he found out about Michael. He wasn't following her around anymore, either. She knew he was hurt and betrayed, but she couldn't let him do anything to Michael.
"Right, right," Rodney said, shaking her from her thoughts. "Meanwhile, we'll just sit here until they decide to either kill us or trade us for something. Great idea."
Teyla glanced around the empty cell, looking for something that could possibly help them escape. The walls of the small cell were smooth and cold, except for the one that faced the long, dark corridor, which had thick bars spaced evenly apart. There was absolutely nothing in there with them, not even a blanket. She let out of a puff of air, frustrated.
"I've already tried the door," Rodney said, waving one hand towards where she was looking. "None of the bars are loose, and there's a force field around the entire cell."
She sat down against the wall opposite him. "Then we will have to wait until the guards return, and see if we can surprise them."
"I was afraid you'd say that," Rodney said darkly.
They sat in comfortable silence. She didn't think she'd ever been captured with just Rodney before. Usually the team was divided with John and Rodney on one side, and Teyla and Ronon (or Aiden, before he'd changed and gone all crazy) on the other. She knew Rodney was brave when he had to be, but right now he had to be frightened.
"Perhaps this is a chance for us to get to know each other," she said, smiling.
He looked at her sourly. "Are you trying to play Truth or Dare? Fine," he said haughtily. "I'll start. I'm having a secret gay affair."
"I am involved with a Wraith."
Rodney glared. "You win."
Silence again.
Then: "A Wraith? Are you serious?"
She nodded. "Michael has returned."
"There's a Wraith in the city?" he cried. "Holy shit, why don't you just kill us in our sleep and get it over with? Who knows about this? Does Elizabeth know? No, of course not, she'd never allow this to happen."
She let him babble for a few minutes, knowing it made him feel better.
When he quieted down, still huffing a bit, she asked, "You and John are happy?" She knew it was none of her business, but they were her friends, and really, she was curious. And the whole thing made sense, now that she thought about it. John was very attractive and charming, but he was also bitchy (Lorne's word, not hers), sarcastic, and emotionally unavailable, and Rodney was just... Rodney.
"Of course we are," he sniffed, crossing his arms over his chest. "It's a perfect match. His looks, my brains... Not that I like him just for his looks, I mean. He's intelligent in his own way. And funny. And very good in--" He coughed, then straightened his back. "How are you and-- Michael?"
"He makes me happy," she said, picking at a loose thread on her jacket, "but I cannot help but feel we are doomed. He is a Wraith, and I am a human living on Atlantis."
"How very Romeo and Juliet," Rodney said, but it sounded accusing. He narrowed his eyes thoughtfully. "Did you know that in all ancient languages on Earth, the word 'happiness' is also the same word for 'lucky'?"
"Is that true?" Teyla asked.
"Probably," Rodney said. "I read it somewhere."
That was when John, Ronon, Lorne, Stackhouse, and a squadron of other Marines busted in the door and pulled them out.
***
Having someone to come home to after missions was a lot nicer than Teyla ever imagined. Especially on a day where she'd been held hostage by a hostile people intent on harming her and her team.
Michael was asleep when she came in, curled up on her bed. Even in his Wraith form, his face was relaxed and open as he slept. She dropped her boots, vest, and weapons in a pile on the floor and climbed in next to him.
When she opened her eyes again, he was back to human, smiling at her. She liked the way the skin around his eyes crinkled. "Hey," he said. "Rough mission?"
"Routine," she replied, rolling onto her back.
He pressed against her, kissing her chin, her ear, her neck, running a hand across her stomach. A shiver ran through her, and she and leaned against his chest. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so relaxed and so full of energy at once. Remembering what Rodney had said about happiness and luck, she whispered, "I want you to make love to me."
Michael sucked in a sharp breath, and said, "Yes, I can do that." He kissed her palm, murmuring, "I love you."
He cupped her face in his hands, and leaned forward--
"No," she said softly, stopping him with a hand on his chest. "As a Wraith."
***
Day 7
She woke up alone the next morning. "Michael?" she called, sitting up.
No answer.
A quick inspection told her she was alone. Hands shaking, she dressed quickly, although it took her two tries to tie her boots. She sucked in air quickly, wrapping her arms around herself until her mind cleared and she knew, deep inside, Michael had harmed someone, and she'd have to kill him. She'd kill him because she loved him.
She tucked her knife into her pants, took the safety off her gun, and stepped out into the hall.
But as soon she neared the transporter, she spotted Major Lorne, gun in hand, leaning over a fallen Ronon. A cold hand gripped her heart. Ronon's eyes were closed, his features curled into a grimace. In his right hand he held a fistfull of long, white hair.
"He's alive," Lorne said. He pressed the button on his radio. "Medical team to the residential area, we have a man down." He squinted. "Is that--"
"Wraith," Teyla said, slowly standing.
Suddenly she knew what had happened: Michael had experienced his most perfect moment with her, and now he wasn't the man she knew anymore.
Lorne's mouth fell open. "What--?" Breaking off, he looked sharply to the right, then back up. "A dead body was just found one floor down."
"We need weapons," she said. She nodded at his gun. "You will need more than that. Come with me to the armory."
He nodded, then spoke in his headset: "I need all squads in residential areas one and two. We have a possible Wraith infiltration. For the, like, two of you who've never met a Wraith before, make sure you have plenty of extra ammo."
The route to the armoury was surprisingly empty, which must've meant everyone was already on the lookout for Michael. Teyla hoped no one had found him yet; she wanted to be the one to pull the trigger. It was her right as his lover.
The door to the armoury slid open at Lorne's touch, revealing a disheaveled John and Rodney, making out right in the middle of the artillery. Rodney yelped, and John immediately started batting Rodney's hands -- which were in places she didn't want to think about -- away. "We were just, uh--"
Teyla silenced John with a steely look. They didn't have time for this. She was a strong, independent woman, and she could absolutely shoot her evil Wraith lover in the head. "John, everyone already knows you are a homosexual. Now I have to kill my Wraith boyfriend before he kills anyone else, so please get your weapons."
"Someone died?" Rodney asked, staring at her with wide, panicked eyes. Which shifted over to Lorne. "And, uh, does everyone know about me and him? Because I'm actually--"
"Rodney," John said.
"What? Oh fine, I see, you're all worried about your reputation, but as soon as word gets out I'm the gay one, everything's just peachy."
Teyla grabbed a handful of empty cartridges herself and tucked them into her vest. Major Lorne was just standing there gaping. "Major," she hissed.
He jumped, and then he started grabbing things left and right.
John grabbed his radio off the floor. "Elizabeth, I'm here. I'm going to bring Rodney to the control room, because knowing his luck, if we left him alone he'd run into the Wraith himself."
"Oh, you're so funny," Rodney said.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Major Lorne and John exchange nervous glances.
"Dude," Lorne said, "McKay?"
John stiffened. "Major--"
"It's cool," Lorne said. "I mean, you haven't hidden it very well. I figured it out about a week after arriving here. Sir."
"But Rodney and I didn't get together until recently," John said.
Lorne stared. "Oh. Well."
She finished loading her P-90, and John touched her arm lightly. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly, eyebrows knitting with concern. "You don't have to do this."
"Yes, I do," she said calmly. His arm dropped to his side. "I have been preparing for this day for a long time, Colonel."
The four of them parted ways; John and a complaining Rodney into one transporter, and Teyla and Lorne into another.
"Good luck," John's voice whispered in her ear over the radio, then clicked off.
Lorne studied her. "So Colonel Sheppard's a-- confirmed homosexual, and the Wraith we're killing?"
"I have had sex with him, yes," she answered, not looking at him.
The doors slid open. She could feel Michael nearby. She'd never been this calm in her entire life.
"Well," Lorne said, shaking his head. He hefted his gun up on one shoulder. "I guess there really is someone for everyone."
End.
This fic has not been officially beta read, but I need to thank onthecontrary, font, and thewhiteprophet for their help and encouragement.
Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis does not belong to me. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
1. Even the gen fics are pretty damn gay.
2. The main character is put into an unusual situation that makes him or her feel as if the entire world has gone mad.
3. The plots revolve around the characters finding insane ways to resolve an insane problem.
4. There's no smut, except for that one time, and we don't talk about that.
5. The story is 90% dialogue.
Wow, that was actually sort of depressing. This is just like the other day when I was complaining, "I wish I could write stories that were totally deep and shit."
Canadian elections are on Monday. I don't know about you guys, but everyone I know in my little part of western Canada is voting NDP, which cracks me up, because everyone's like, "I can't stand Layton, but I'll eat my own arm before voting Conservative."
So, uh, in the continuing trend of my fandom-related mental illness, I've written yet more SGA fic. This is based on something I think font said during the latest ep, which is, "Teyla/Michael is so Buffy/Angel." Only this isn't a crossover (praise Allah), just crackfic.
This contains serious spoilers for episode 2x18, 'Michael', which was the ep most recently aired in Canada. I have no idea what the US schedule is for SGA, but I know it's behind the Canadian one.
A Wraith By Any Other Name by eleveninches
Summary: Teyla don't want no drama. A week in the life of Teyla Emmagan after Michael. Not AU, but won't follow canon by the time the 2x19 hits.
Teyla/Michael, Teyla/Ronon (sort of), Sheppard/McKay, Lorne/his ego.
Day 1
A week after Teyla Emmagan was kidnapped by the Wraith-turned-human-turned-Wraith, she had a nightmare. One would think that, given her lifestyle, she would've spent every night with nightmares. But in reality, she was just so used to everything that being terrified wasn't even her first reaction anymore. Now it was confusion mixed with anger, and maybe a little worry. But in the end, mostly confusion, because she hadn't realized how strange the universe was before she moved to Atlantis.
In her nightmare, she was stalked by someone as she walked from the control room to her apartments. Her heart was cold, and there were goosebumps on her arms, but when she turned around, it wasn't a Wraith; it was John.
"I love you," John said.
She screamed and took off running.
At the other end of the hall, a door opened, and Michael stepped out. But he wasn't like she'd ever seen him; he was completely Wraith now, blue skin, long, white hair. He bared his fangs at her and spread his arms wide.
"I love you," he said.
She threw herself into his embrace, intent on kissing his cold, slimy lips, and that's when she woke up, clenching her bedsheets in her hands, heart pounding like when she was young and they used to make a game of seeing who could make it farthest into the old city before panicking. (She had always won.)
The next day, she sat through three hours of Elizabeth, Lorne, Rodney, and John fighting over the best way to either save or destroy the city, which Teyla, exhausted by this point, thought sounded familiar. Normally, the way John and Rodney bickered would amuse her, or Elizabeth would say something that would make her think, or Rodney would just say something completely offensive, but Teyla felt sluggish and distant, like everything was under water. Ronon wasn't making eye contact with her either, and usually his "what the hell's going on?" looks made things a little less boring.
At one point, she caught John staring at her, and her stomach lurched, but then she realized he was just checking out his hair in the tinted glass behind her.
"Teyla?" Elizabeth asked, her tone a little sharper than usual. They were all stressed. "Teyla, are you listening?"
"Um, yes," she said, shaking herself back into focus. "I am sorry, I was thinking of... battle tactics."
Elizabeth gave her a look that said she knew Teyla was lying, but she didn't comment on it.
Afterwords -- Teyla didn't remember much of what had happened, although later she vaguely recalled offering her people for backup again, and Lorne looking pleased rather than angry, unlike Bates had last year -- she took a long, hot bath, meditated for two hours, and then crushed the egos of several Marines using her fighting sticks. Ronon lurked outside the gym, but she pretended she didn't see him.
***
"Hey, Teyla, wait up!"
She stiffened at John's voice, but slowed down so he could catch up with her as she left the gym (and four very sore, sorry Marines) behind. It wasn't his fault he was in her horrible dream. Or that she really didn't want to sleep with him. Certainly, she'd been attracted to him once, long ago, but that was before she'd actually gotten to know him. John charmed people easily, in a way that made optimistic people feel he only had eyes for them, and pessimistic ones to wonder if he also flirted with his mirror, his gun, and his hairbrush, just to keep in practice. Teyla knew him well enough to know his cocky smirks and weird eyebrow waggles were just how he behaved all the time.
"You feeling better?" he asked, expression serious. "You seemed kind of out of it earlier."
She didn't know what "it" was, but she knew better than to ask. And she really, really didn't want to have this conversation. "I am fine. I am just worried about our current Wraith dilemma."
He nodded. "You'd tell me if you were having weird dreams again, right? Because you have that death-warmed-over kind of look right now. You've been acting weird ever since..." John made a gesture that didn't make any sense to her. She assumed he meant Michael. "We're worried about you."
"'We' are?" she asked, narrowing her eyes, trying to figure out if he was coming on to her.
He didn't seem to notice. "Yeah," he said, "I think Ronon feels bad for what happened. Or he's hungry. He's hard to read sometimes."
"I promise I will tell you if something happens," she lied, "but for now I really am fine."
They arrived at the door to her apartment. John gave her a strong clap on the shoulder, said, "See you later," and walked off.
She frowned at his retreating form. Then she sighed and looked back. "You can come out now, Ronon."
Ronon poked his head out from around the corner. "Sheppard's a filthy liar," he growled. "I don't feel bad about anything."
"He is just trying to help in his own way," she said.
"Yeah, well." He crossed his huge arms over his equally huge chest. "He's right, you look like crap. What's going on? Need me to kill someone for you?"
She and Ronon had a... She hated to call it a connection, because he wasn't one of her people, and they hadn't really known each other that long, but that's what it was. Atlantis was full of people from a different galaxy, but they were the ones that were considered different.
"I had a dream Colonel Sheppard said he loved me," she started. She didn't think Ronon was ready to hear about the other half of the dream. She was barely ready for the other half. "It has made me worried he has feeling for me. Feelings that I do not return."
Ronon looked shocked, then blank, then angry. Then back to blank. "I think Sheppard might be seeing someone, actually."
"Really?" John hadn't mentioned anything about that. Of course, he never talked about anyone he was interested in. "He told you this?"
He shrugged. "No, but I heard Lorne call Sheppard a 'homo.' I think it's their slang for a guy who has a lot of women. I heard Caldwell call him that once too."
Teyla went inside very relieved, but also wondering why John would tell the Marines information about his love life before he would tell her, Ronon, and Rodney. But then she remembered John was a very silly person, and she pushed it out of her mind.
***
At first she tried to sleep, but all she could think was, what if her dream came back? What if she finished it this time? There were only two ways for it to go -- death or sex -- and both were disturbing. When she was a child and had nightmares, her father had sing her to sleep, and after he was Culled, her dreams of being taken were replaced with ones of her killing as many Wraith she could get her hands on. Those hadn't exactly woken her up in terror.
There was only so much meditation even Teyla could do in one day, so she decided to take a walk. Without paying attention to where she was going, she found herself wandering towards the gym again, where only a week before she'd sparred with Michael, where she'd felt his muscular body under her fists, where he'd laughed and smiled and trusted her and told her he was afraid of himself.
She was almost there when from behind her came footsteps, and she tensed, remembering her dream. Maybe, like last year, it had been telling her something. She hoped that when she turned around it was a Wraith and not John, because she at least she didn't have to see the Wraith every day, and she could stab a Wraith in the face without worrying if it would hurt its feelings.
She slowed down her pace until the figure was right behind her. Moving swiftly, she grabbed the body and slammed it against the wall with one hand, and with the other, pulled out the knife she kept hidden the back of her pants. She aimed towards the face--
"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!"
Teyla faltered, and her knife hit the wall. Heart slamming against her ribs, she thought, I almost--
"Are you psychotic?" Major Lorne demanded, and she let go of him. He slid down the wall, touching his neck gingerly. "I wasn't even sneaking around."
"I am sorry," she said, trying to calm down. "I thought you were a Wraith."
"Yeah, I can see how you'd make that mistake," he snapped.
She sucked in a sharp breath through her nose, biting back her anger. "Why are you wandering the halls so--"
Then she took in his pants (she'd been told they were "sweatpants" by some, "track bottoms" by others), his sweat-stained t-shirt that said "Bob Jones University," and his giant orange ball tucked under his arm. He really wasn't much taller than her. It was strange being able to glare head-on instead of looking up.
"I am sorry," she repeated, flushing. Of course Lorne was just outside playing his bouncing ball game. "I am going to head back to my rooms now."
"You're never eating at the cool table again," she heard him mutter as she rounded the corner.
First Bates, now Lorne. It seemed she had bad luck when it came to John's second-in-commands. At least Bates hadn't been someone she'd already respected before he'd decided she was the root of all their problems.
She locked her door behind her, kicked off her boots, and started to peel off her shirt.
Someone behind her coughed.
Gasping, she spun around, once more unsheathing her knife.
It was Michael -- but not Michael-the-Wraith. It was Michael-the-human, with his messy blond hair and his warm, shaky smile, standing in front of her open window. Teyla's voice caught in her throat, but she held the knife tight.
"Teyla," he said, taking a step closer.
"Do not come near me," she managed, spreading her legs to a fighting stance. She drew the knife in a line with his throat. She could absolutely kill him if she had to. She could. "What are you doing here? Why do you look--" 'Normal' was probably not the best word to use here. "Human?"
He shifted, looking uncomfortable. Something brushed against her mind, and she knew suddenly that he was afraid and worried, but not for himself. He was still a Wraith, and she was sensing his emotions.
"I don't know. It must be a side-effect from the retrovirus. I can change back and forth just by thinking about it." He chuckled darkly. "It was really useful for getting into the city undetected."
She swallowed thickly. "Why did you come back here?"
"Hive Ships are on their way to Atlantis," said Michael.
"Yes, we know," Teyla replied.
He actually looked taken aback. "Oh. Yeah, I guess you would."
Michael just stood there, staring at her. She sensed that when he looked at her, he felt something that confused him. She knew exactly how he felt (and not just because they had an empathic Wraith connection); she should've felt a lot more scared -- there was a Wraith in her room and all she had was a knife -- but it was Michael. He was everything she hated, but she understood him. She was part-Wraith, he was part-Wraith. She knew what it was like to know there was something different and wrong about you. In their final meeting, she knew he hadn't wanted to feed off her, just like he hadn't wanted to kill that Marine, but the Wraith inside had taken over. And despite that she'd known the whole time he was evil, she'd still felt drawn to him.
"Why are you telling me this?" she asked.
He looked away, face covered in shadows. "Because I care about you."
"You tried to eat me on the planet," she said.
He grimaced. "Out of love? Besides, you offered yourself to me."
"It was not like that," she sniffed.
Michael grinned like she'd just told him she loved him. But then it faded, and he looked pale and bleak and-- hot.
"If I asked to see you as a true Wraith, would you attack me?" she asked hesitantly.
He frowned thoughtfully and said, "No, I don't think so. I behave the same in both forms."
His features shifted: face lengthening, skin darkening, hair whitening. When he was completely Wraith, he put his hands on his hips and said, "How do I look?"
"I am strangely attracted to you," Teyla admitted, hating herself.
Michael beamed a pointy smile.
***
Over the course of her life, Teyla had considered herself a woman, a daughter, a warrior, and a leader, but this was the first time she wondered if she was an idiot. She had told Michael she couldn't trust him, and he'd promised her information, schematics, anything she wanted, if it would make her believe him. Then she'd made him sleep in her bathtub while she spent the rest of the night pacing and trying not to tear out her hair (although that was mostly because it took Corporal Smitty two hours to blowdry it once a week).
When the sun started to rise, the door to her bathroom opened. Teyla looked up from her position on the floor, where she was sitting with her forehead pressed against her knees.
Michael knelt beside her. She wrapped one hand around the handle of the gun lying next to her. "You're anxious."
"Imagine if you were hiding me on a Hive Ship," she said. "And then imagine I could kill you at any second."
His face darkened. "I told you," he said quietly, "I'm here because I care about you. I know you feel this connection between us. I knew from the second we met that we were meant to be together."
"What you felt was the mind link between us," she said firmly. "I am able to touch the minds of the Wraith."
Michael shook his head. "Then why didn't I want to feed off you? Why couldn't I stop thinking about you, even after I was on a Hive Ship?" He jumped to his feet and scrubbed his face with his hands. She felt a thousand things at once -- anger, excitement, sadness -- but she didn't know if they were her emotions or his. "Don't you see, Teyla? I thought that when I went back, everything would be just how I left it. That I'd go back to wanting nothing more than to feed off humans. But I didn't feel the same anymore; when I looked around me, all I saw were monsters. I wanted to come back here more than anything. The retrovirus changed more than just my body. I'm neither Wraith nor human now."
It sounded too good to be true. Teyla was hit with a sudden rush of anger. "How can I trust you?" she demanded hotly. "Last time you said you knew you were a Wraith through and through."
"I--" He stopped, brightening. "I'll show you I mean it. Read my mind."
"No," she said.
"Teyla," he pleaded, "let me-- let me prove it to you."
His eyes were big and blue, and his handsome face was so eager, and she remembered how horrified he'd been when he discovered the truth about himself.
Hesitantly, she took his hand -- his smooth, warm, perfectly human hand -- in his, and she closed her eyes.
***
Day 2
"You ever had an orgy in front of aliens?" Lorne asked, finishing the last of his noodles.
John looked up from where he was doodling a puddlejumper on his paper napkin. "Yeah, once or twice." Lorne's eyes widened. "What, haven't you?"
"No," Lorne said.
"Of course not," John sighed.
Teyla dropped into the empty seat beside Lorne, who abruptly picked up his tray and left, tossing a glare over his shoulder.
"What's that about?" John asked, watching as Lorne dumped his tray and stormed off.
"He thinks I am insane," Teyla said casually. "Listen, I have something important to tell you."
John frowned. "What's going on?"
Teyla's eyes darted back and forth, probably making sure no one was going walk by and overhear them. He hadn't seen her this wound up since she'd been on Ford's superhero enzyme. "It is really horrible. You will probably want to remove me from the team. Or worse." She bit her lip. "You will probably want to stop being my friend."
Okay, this was weird. "I promise that, short of killing someone, that won't happen. And even if you did kill someone, we'd probably all agree it was the right thing to do."
She took a deep breath and straighened her shoulders. "I lied to you earlier. I have been having dreams lately. But they have been of Michael coming back to Atlantis. And last night--" She leaned forward. "Why are you writing 'Lieutenant Colonel Sheppard-McKay'?" She snatched his napkin before he had a chance to even react. He'd forgotten she knew how to read. Stupid Elizabeth and her stupid "a book is a gift you can open again and again" campaign. "'John Sheppard-McKay, Mr John McKay, Mr and Dr McKay'?"
"It's a joke," he said quickly, grabbing the napkin back, shredding it into tiny pieces, and then eating it. "And keep your voice down, will you?"
Her eyes were huge. "I thought you were a homo."
He choked on paper bits. "How do you even know that word?"
"Ronon told me it is a name for a man who courts many women," she said, looking and sounding baffled. "Is that not correct?"
"No. God. It means 'homosexual.' As in, a guy who has sex with other guys."
She stared at him. He stared back. Slowly, she said, "Oh. I see. Now I do not feel so bad about what I have to tell you."
"Yeah?" he asked.
Teyla smiled. "Michael and I have decided to give our relationship a chance."
"Michael the Wraith?"
"He has declared his love for me," she said stiffly.
John started to get up, fumbling for his handgun. "Oh my God, he's in Atlantis, isn't he."
She grabbed his arm roughly and pulled him back down. A few people looked up when his arm slammed against the table. "I trust him. I have been in his mind, and I know he is telling the truth. He came here because he did not want to see me die."
"He kidnapped you and tried to feed off you," he hissed, wrenching out of her grasp.
"He said he was sorry," she insisted.
"This is nuts," John said. "I don't care how much this Wraith loves you, he's still a Wraith. You can't just let him wander the halls. What about when he gets hungry? Remember Ellia?"
She stood. "Come with me."
If he was a man of better judgement, he probably wouldn't have followed her to her rooms, where a very human Michael was sitting on an Athosian pillow chair-type thing, reading a book. How the hell did a Wraith know how to read? Did their freaky sex slaves also serve as tutors?
Ronon and Rodney were going to freak out. No, actually, Rodney would freak out; Ronon would just go homicidal. People were going to end up dead because of this.
"You owe me a cowboy hat," John said, looming over Michael, one hand on his thigh holster.
Michael looked at him blankly. "I didn't take it with me."
"You tore it into shreds when you were having your post-discovery freak out."
"Here, I'll buy you a new one at the Wraith country-western store with my Wraith money," Michael said sarcastically.
John grabbed him by the shoulders and hauled him up against the wall. Michael let out a cry of surprise, and John shoved his gun under the Wraith's -- man's, whatever -- nose. "John," Teyla shouted, as John demanded, "How did you get here? What do you want?"
Michael's eyes flickered to Teyla.
The next thing John knew, Teyla was twisting his arm behind his back and dragging him out to the corridor. John struggled, but she didn't let go. This was possibly the first time he'd ever hated that she was freakishly strong.
"I cannot believe you," she snarled at him.
"You're making a huge mistake," John yelled, spinning around to face her.
"He is still Michael," Teyla said, as if that explained everything. "He is still my friend. Haven't you ever found a Wraith... attractive?"
"I'm not attracted to fish," John said. "Especially ones that want to eat my soul."
Her eyes narrowed. "And yet you are attracted to Dr McKay, who, I believe, is not considered coventionally attractive."
He sputtered. Rodney was hot, dammit. "At least the guy I'm sleeping with doesn't want to eat me."
A passing Marine, and God, John knew him, he hung out with Cadman, shot John a strange look.
"I need you to trust me," she said.
"I'm not a trusting guy," he replied, crossing his arms over his chest.
She got that look on her face that told him she was about to mention, again, how he let Rodney blow up a solar system.
"Do you even know what you're going to do with him?" he asked. "You can't just let him stay in your room."
Teyla lowered her eyes. "I have not yet decided. I need time. But I cannot let him go back to a people he despises."
"I thought he despised us," John said.
"I read--"
"Yeah, yeah, you read his mind. You told me." He sighed. He was probably making the worst decision of his life. Which said a lot, because most of his life was characterized by bad choices. "What do you want me to do?"
"Promise me you will not tell anyone," she said.
***
"There's a Wraith in the city," Ronon said.
John stumbled over his own two feet as they walked down the corridor. Rodney started looking around wildly, like it would just pop out right in front of them. "What? Here? Again? You're sure? We've got to tell Elizabeth. Someone give me a gun. Oh God, what am I talking about, I can't hit anyone with a gun!"
"There aren't any Wraith here," John growled. "Stop trying to scare McKay, Ronon."
Ronon shook his head. His dreads actually made noise when he did that, although that was probably just the knives. "I'm serious. Something feels weird."
Rodney spoke into his headset, "Chuck, can you check for any strange life sign signals in the city? Yes, I'm serious. I don't know, maybe someone alone in an isolated area. Oh really? You won't be saying I'm paranoid when I outlive you all, will you?" He looked back at them. "Well, if there's a Wraith in Atlantis, it's hiding in plain sight. Which is actually really disturbing."
"There is no Wraith," John said loudly. When everyone else found out about Michael, he was going to be so screwed.
***
Day 3
The heads of the city, plus Teyla and Ronon, had been having daily meetings where they tried to come up with a defense strategy. So far all their allies with actual weapons had turned down their plea for help, and all their allies without technology had offered manpower. It was incredibly frustrating. Even Colonel Caldwell had admitted that the Daedalus would most likely not make it through the upcoming battle alone.
"You can't possibly be serious!" McKay shouted, waving his arms. "Do you even listen to yourself speak?"
"It's not like they're people," Colonel Caldwell snapped, audibly grounding his teeth together.
"I'm pretty sure they are," John said.
"They're goats. And you said yourself they can make themselves internally combust."
Rodney flailed. "Alien goats. Sentient goats. They build houses made of straw!"
"They sang us songs and told me my hair was pretty," said Ronon.
Elizabeth cleared her throat. "Unfortunately, Colonel, I agree with Rodney. We can't ask a group of people to be suicide bombers for us, no matter how... goat-like they seem."
Caldwell grumbled under his breath, but he didn't protest.
Teyla felt this was her chance to speak up. "I have some news that may be able to help us," she said. "A friend has brought me information concerning the Hive Ships." Everyone looked at her with bright eyes, except for John, who eyed her suspiciously. "I have been given the location of three sets of fleets. I believe they are all on their way to Atlantis."
"Great," said McKay, "this is just how I wanted to start my day, knowing that we're all completely screwed."
"Thank you, Teyla," Elizabeth said diplomatically. "At least now we know what we're up against. Rodney, John, neither of you have any ideas on how--?"
"I am not done yet," Teyla said, holding up a finger in a gesture she'd seen Rodney use many times.
Elizabeth's eyebrows arched. "Please."
"I have also been told that one of the fleets is on its way to Cull a planet with a small population before heading directly here. My friend believes that if we were to help the people of this planet escape, the Wraith's hunger might cause them to behave recklessly in battle. Perhaps it might even drive them to attack each other."
Elizabeth's mouth dropped open, but Colonel Caldwell leaned forward and asked, "And did this friend happen to mention how we're supposed to hide an entire planet from the Wraith?"
"Couldn't the Daedalus move the people to another planet?" Ronon asked. Teyla was absurdly relieved to have his support.
"No," Caldwell snapped.
Ronon scowled. "I remember it being a pretty big ship."
Caldwell sneered back. "What if it's a trap? The Wraith could be trying to get the Daedalus away from Atlantis."
"It is not a trap," she said coldly.
She wanted to tell him exactly how she knew the information was true. She wanted to tell all of them. But she knew they'd hunt down Michael and maybe even kick her out of the city, and then what would she have? She'd grown too accustomed to her life in Atlantis, a life that she loved.
"I think we should follow Teyla's plan," John said. He was slouched over and not meeting her eyes, but his mouth was set in a determined line.
Elizabeth nodded slowly. "It's the best plan we have as of yet. Colonel Caldwell?"
Caldwell's eye twitched.
Afterwords, Teyla caught up with John. "Thank you for believing in me."
He looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "You really have feelings for this guy?" he asked, still sounding incredulous.
"Yes, I believe so," she said honestly, remembering how the night before he'd held her hand and told her he didn't know how to live without her.
John's brow furrowed. "On one hand, I'm happy for you, but on the other, we are totally going to die."
***
Day 4
The Daedalus managed to get every single person off of the planet. Teyla wasn't the type to gloat, but it was nice hearing Caldwell telling Elizabeth, "That was probably a good idea," and, "Your people aren't always idiots," and, "I will totally take you back to Earth if you want to run away together." John had been pleased, too, and he stopped looking at her like she'd betrayed them.
That night, Michael ate a chicken sandwich like a human would, and then showed her a Wraith dance that involved a lot of ass shaking and arm waving. "We aren't a graceful people," he grunted, rocking back and forth, arms above his head. Teyla laughed until her stomach hurt.
***
Day 5
Halling hummed to himself while stitching two pieces of leather together. The thing on the table was starting to resemble a small boot, probably for Jinto, who was growing at an almost alarming rate. At the pace he was going, in a few years he'd probably be as tall as Ronon. Teyla watched as Halling's steady fingers moved back and forth over the material. It was nice being back in an Athosian home.
"Do you believe that all the Wraith are evil?" she asked suddenly.
"What brings this on?" he replied, pausing mid-motion.
She looked away, embarrassed. "I am just curious."
Halling put the needles down, gazing at her thoughtfully. "There is an old story, back from the days of the first Cullings. It is said there was a Wraith who did not want to feed off humans, and he took refuge in the woods. Eventually, he befriended a young woman, who claimed to everyone he would not harm them."
"What happened to them?"
He gazed at her evenly. "The Wraith killed her. According to the story, once he experienced a moment of perfect happiness, the Wraith inside him, who he truly was, took over. He managed to kill several more villagers before they got to him."
A shiver ran down her spine. "Do you know what this-- this 'perfect happiness' was?"
"No one knows." He smiled and patted her hand. "But it is just a silly story to scare children. Do not think about it."
***
Every time Ronon finished a book, Elizabeth rewarded him by allowing him to play with something cool and Ancient (unless it was a weapon or something that McKay and Zelenka had frequently told her no one was allowed to touch, although most of the time Ronon thought they just didn't want anyone discovering something new before they did). Last week, Dr Simpson had let him float around in the zero-gravity room, which had been fun, although he'd been so queasy he'd barely been able to eat dinner that night. Today Ronon had finished Curious George Goes to the Zoo, so Chuck let him play with the control room sensors, which actually wasn't as fun as it sounded.
He flipped through a few screens, counting how many people were in the mess, the labs, the barracks, and the gym. Then he changed over to the residential areas, because it'd be funny to see how many people were slacking off to get laid. That's when he saw something that made him freeze.
He found Sheppard on his way to the labs. "Hey, Sheppard."
John waited for him to catch up. "What's up?"
"Someone's in Teyla's room," Ronon said quietly.
"Maybe it's... Teyla," Sheppard said, widening his eyes comically.
He shook his head. "She's on the mainland. You can get in the doors, right, with your gene?"
Without waiting for an answer, he headed for the transporter. Sheppard followed at his heels, calling, "Wait, wait, wait!" As soon as the doors closed around them, Sheppard said, "Look, it's, um, it's her boyfriend."
Ronon went cold all over. They didn't have this word on Sateda, but he'd heard it enough in Atlantis to know what it meant. "Boyfriend?"
"She didn't want you to know," Sheppard continued.
"Is it one of your Marines?" Ronon asked. He felt like breaking something. Preferably Teyla's boyfriend.
"Yes," John said, a little too earnestly.
Ronon chewed on that for a moment. "What's his name?"
"Uh."
"Is it you?" Ronon took a step forward. He'd never felt so betrayed in his life. That time Sateda was destroyed was nothing. Sheppard was such a traitor.
Sheppard's head snapped up. "I'm not the intergalactic playboy everyone seems to think I am."
"I don't know what that means," Ronon said.
"It means 'no,'" Sheppard replied, sounding annoyed. "Besides, he's in her room, and I'm standing here talking to you."
"But you know who he is."
Ronon stalked out of the transporter, heading straight for Teyla's apartments. The hallway was blissfully empty, which meant he wouldn't have to worry about which direction he shot in.
"It's a complicated situation," Sheppard said, running to match Ronon's brisk stride. "She didn't want you to know for a reason."
"Is it because she wants me?" Ronon asked. Sheppard cringed. "Didn't think so. Open the door."
Sheppard didn't move. One corner of his mouth turned downwards. "There's something else. It's Michael."
Ronon's mind went horribly blank for a second. "The Wraith?"
"Yeah."
"I'll kill him with my bare hands," Ronon said, shaking with rage. He fumbled around his pants -- why had he let the Atlantians give him such big pants? he never had this problem before -- for his gun.
Sheppard grabbed his shoulder. Not that it would have stopped him, considering their height difference. "Hold on, maybe she's right about this. Have you known her to be wrong before?"
"What?" Ronon demanded.
"Besides," Sheppard said, not looking at him, "she can't help who she falls in love with."
Ronon grit his teeth so hard a jolt of pain shot up his face. "I can't believe you-- you-- Oh no, I see what this is about! You hooked up with McKay!"
"This has nothing to do with me or McKay," Sheppard protested.
"Both you and Teyla are sick in the head," Ronon said.
Sheppard heaved a sigh. "Yeah."
Ronon gestured to the door with his gun. "Open it." Again, Sheppard didn't move, but he screwed up his face like he was thinking hard. "You know we have to kill him. Teyla will be mad for a while, but she'll understand eventually."
Sheppard seemed torn. "I think we should wait for Teyla first. For now, stand down."
Ronon's fist slammed on the door, hard. His wrist throbbed in pain, but it wasn't as strong as the rage clawing up his throat. "Open up, Wraith," he shouted.
"I'm ordering you to stand down," Sheppard snapped.
He wasn't taking orders this time. Not when Sheppard was so wrong. "Open the door," he growled, this time to Sheppard.
"Ronon?"
He spun around. Teyla was standing there, hands on her hips, looking pissed off.
"What do you think you are doing?" she questioned icily.
"Saving your life," he said.
She stepped forward, hissing, "You do not understand the situation. Michael is both a human and a Wraith, and you cannot kill him for being what we made him. He knows feeding off people is wrong."
"So did that little girl who turned into a bug," Ronon pointed out. "Didn't stop her."
"Ronon," she said softly. She tilted her chin, a determined expression on her face. "I love him."
They stared at each other. Out of the corner of his eye, Ronon noticed Sheppard starting to back away slowly. "Uh, this seems like a private moment." Neither of them acknowledged him, and he hurried off.
Teyla was so beautiful, with her brown skin and her dark eyes and her breasts he'd been told not to stare at, and Ronon was going to break down the door and kill the Wraith right fucking now for putting his filthy hands on her.
"Would you love me if I was a Wraith?" Ronon asked.
She winced. "I have been considering making myself an appointment with Dr Heightmeyer."
***
Day 6
"Oh God, we're so screwed," Rodney moaned when the people of Fenth tossed Teyla into the cell with him.
She sat up quickly, checking herself over for broken bones. When she was certain she was okay, she assured him, "Colonel Sheppard and Ronon will rescue us."
Well, John would, at least. Ronon hadn't spoken to her since he found out about Michael. He wasn't following her around anymore, either. She knew he was hurt and betrayed, but she couldn't let him do anything to Michael.
"Right, right," Rodney said, shaking her from her thoughts. "Meanwhile, we'll just sit here until they decide to either kill us or trade us for something. Great idea."
Teyla glanced around the empty cell, looking for something that could possibly help them escape. The walls of the small cell were smooth and cold, except for the one that faced the long, dark corridor, which had thick bars spaced evenly apart. There was absolutely nothing in there with them, not even a blanket. She let out of a puff of air, frustrated.
"I've already tried the door," Rodney said, waving one hand towards where she was looking. "None of the bars are loose, and there's a force field around the entire cell."
She sat down against the wall opposite him. "Then we will have to wait until the guards return, and see if we can surprise them."
"I was afraid you'd say that," Rodney said darkly.
They sat in comfortable silence. She didn't think she'd ever been captured with just Rodney before. Usually the team was divided with John and Rodney on one side, and Teyla and Ronon (or Aiden, before he'd changed and gone all crazy) on the other. She knew Rodney was brave when he had to be, but right now he had to be frightened.
"Perhaps this is a chance for us to get to know each other," she said, smiling.
He looked at her sourly. "Are you trying to play Truth or Dare? Fine," he said haughtily. "I'll start. I'm having a secret gay affair."
"I am involved with a Wraith."
Rodney glared. "You win."
Silence again.
Then: "A Wraith? Are you serious?"
She nodded. "Michael has returned."
"There's a Wraith in the city?" he cried. "Holy shit, why don't you just kill us in our sleep and get it over with? Who knows about this? Does Elizabeth know? No, of course not, she'd never allow this to happen."
She let him babble for a few minutes, knowing it made him feel better.
When he quieted down, still huffing a bit, she asked, "You and John are happy?" She knew it was none of her business, but they were her friends, and really, she was curious. And the whole thing made sense, now that she thought about it. John was very attractive and charming, but he was also bitchy (Lorne's word, not hers), sarcastic, and emotionally unavailable, and Rodney was just... Rodney.
"Of course we are," he sniffed, crossing his arms over his chest. "It's a perfect match. His looks, my brains... Not that I like him just for his looks, I mean. He's intelligent in his own way. And funny. And very good in--" He coughed, then straightened his back. "How are you and-- Michael?"
"He makes me happy," she said, picking at a loose thread on her jacket, "but I cannot help but feel we are doomed. He is a Wraith, and I am a human living on Atlantis."
"How very Romeo and Juliet," Rodney said, but it sounded accusing. He narrowed his eyes thoughtfully. "Did you know that in all ancient languages on Earth, the word 'happiness' is also the same word for 'lucky'?"
"Is that true?" Teyla asked.
"Probably," Rodney said. "I read it somewhere."
That was when John, Ronon, Lorne, Stackhouse, and a squadron of other Marines busted in the door and pulled them out.
***
Having someone to come home to after missions was a lot nicer than Teyla ever imagined. Especially on a day where she'd been held hostage by a hostile people intent on harming her and her team.
Michael was asleep when she came in, curled up on her bed. Even in his Wraith form, his face was relaxed and open as he slept. She dropped her boots, vest, and weapons in a pile on the floor and climbed in next to him.
When she opened her eyes again, he was back to human, smiling at her. She liked the way the skin around his eyes crinkled. "Hey," he said. "Rough mission?"
"Routine," she replied, rolling onto her back.
He pressed against her, kissing her chin, her ear, her neck, running a hand across her stomach. A shiver ran through her, and she and leaned against his chest. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so relaxed and so full of energy at once. Remembering what Rodney had said about happiness and luck, she whispered, "I want you to make love to me."
Michael sucked in a sharp breath, and said, "Yes, I can do that." He kissed her palm, murmuring, "I love you."
He cupped her face in his hands, and leaned forward--
"No," she said softly, stopping him with a hand on his chest. "As a Wraith."
***
Day 7
She woke up alone the next morning. "Michael?" she called, sitting up.
No answer.
A quick inspection told her she was alone. Hands shaking, she dressed quickly, although it took her two tries to tie her boots. She sucked in air quickly, wrapping her arms around herself until her mind cleared and she knew, deep inside, Michael had harmed someone, and she'd have to kill him. She'd kill him because she loved him.
She tucked her knife into her pants, took the safety off her gun, and stepped out into the hall.
But as soon she neared the transporter, she spotted Major Lorne, gun in hand, leaning over a fallen Ronon. A cold hand gripped her heart. Ronon's eyes were closed, his features curled into a grimace. In his right hand he held a fistfull of long, white hair.
"He's alive," Lorne said. He pressed the button on his radio. "Medical team to the residential area, we have a man down." He squinted. "Is that--"
"Wraith," Teyla said, slowly standing.
Suddenly she knew what had happened: Michael had experienced his most perfect moment with her, and now he wasn't the man she knew anymore.
Lorne's mouth fell open. "What--?" Breaking off, he looked sharply to the right, then back up. "A dead body was just found one floor down."
"We need weapons," she said. She nodded at his gun. "You will need more than that. Come with me to the armory."
He nodded, then spoke in his headset: "I need all squads in residential areas one and two. We have a possible Wraith infiltration. For the, like, two of you who've never met a Wraith before, make sure you have plenty of extra ammo."
The route to the armoury was surprisingly empty, which must've meant everyone was already on the lookout for Michael. Teyla hoped no one had found him yet; she wanted to be the one to pull the trigger. It was her right as his lover.
The door to the armoury slid open at Lorne's touch, revealing a disheaveled John and Rodney, making out right in the middle of the artillery. Rodney yelped, and John immediately started batting Rodney's hands -- which were in places she didn't want to think about -- away. "We were just, uh--"
Teyla silenced John with a steely look. They didn't have time for this. She was a strong, independent woman, and she could absolutely shoot her evil Wraith lover in the head. "John, everyone already knows you are a homosexual. Now I have to kill my Wraith boyfriend before he kills anyone else, so please get your weapons."
"Someone died?" Rodney asked, staring at her with wide, panicked eyes. Which shifted over to Lorne. "And, uh, does everyone know about me and him? Because I'm actually--"
"Rodney," John said.
"What? Oh fine, I see, you're all worried about your reputation, but as soon as word gets out I'm the gay one, everything's just peachy."
Teyla grabbed a handful of empty cartridges herself and tucked them into her vest. Major Lorne was just standing there gaping. "Major," she hissed.
He jumped, and then he started grabbing things left and right.
John grabbed his radio off the floor. "Elizabeth, I'm here. I'm going to bring Rodney to the control room, because knowing his luck, if we left him alone he'd run into the Wraith himself."
"Oh, you're so funny," Rodney said.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Major Lorne and John exchange nervous glances.
"Dude," Lorne said, "McKay?"
John stiffened. "Major--"
"It's cool," Lorne said. "I mean, you haven't hidden it very well. I figured it out about a week after arriving here. Sir."
"But Rodney and I didn't get together until recently," John said.
Lorne stared. "Oh. Well."
She finished loading her P-90, and John touched her arm lightly. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly, eyebrows knitting with concern. "You don't have to do this."
"Yes, I do," she said calmly. His arm dropped to his side. "I have been preparing for this day for a long time, Colonel."
The four of them parted ways; John and a complaining Rodney into one transporter, and Teyla and Lorne into another.
"Good luck," John's voice whispered in her ear over the radio, then clicked off.
Lorne studied her. "So Colonel Sheppard's a-- confirmed homosexual, and the Wraith we're killing?"
"I have had sex with him, yes," she answered, not looking at him.
The doors slid open. She could feel Michael nearby. She'd never been this calm in her entire life.
"Well," Lorne said, shaking his head. He hefted his gun up on one shoulder. "I guess there really is someone for everyone."
End.
This fic has not been officially beta read, but I need to thank onthecontrary, font, and thewhiteprophet for their help and encouragement.
Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis does not belong to me. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.