I didn't find enlightenment, but my arms got covered in poridge-like rain. Is there an age where you can't run away anymore? Who the fuck is my mentor? The only one I can think of rolls sushi into 2,4,6 pieces placed on wooden tables with one inch legs. And he's off in circles, in the back room, sniffing powdered sugar and walking away from me.

I could say words, build them up like a gingerbread house, adding embellishes like gumdrops and edible glitter on the porch steps. But how can I act like something sweet when the truth is I am a demon, and it shines through the windows of my sweet bread house. There are only some that accept this because they never press their faces close enough ( Read more... )

I am updating only to say that I am in Israel, and how often can one update livejournal from here~ more to come later for certain. I have been sticking to paper recently but I'm sure lots will leak into the internet world when I get back to Va.

"Do you remember the story where there was a boy who had never seen the sun, and than one day when the sun came out they locked him in the closet and didn't let him out until it was raining again?" -Mandie, talking about first grade

My head is still bruised from where I banged it on your bathroom wall. I fell down after on the shag rug in my pink top, nude on the bottom and breathed heavily but not satisfied because we shouldn't have had this be our last moment. Nights ago when you came over, it was sweet and we were so close to being sweet again that we both should have done ( Read more... )

It may have only been a mistake to you, but for me it was one more chance to hold you before you were gone for good. I miss you still. Even after you call me your mistake, you've called me many things, including your best friend and your girlfriend. And if coming over last night was an attempt to deliberatly hurt me, it failed. Because I still miss ( Read more... )

I remember all those feelings that I read about in her journal, the waking up and being soft and safe between cotton sheets and feeling powerful in the early hours. You never ever forsee not being able to jump back in bed and stretch out your toes around anothers. Last night was horrid. Those days when the bricks seem to layer themselves in neat ( Read more... )

There's no way to say it, so I'm just going to say it.

I feel like ass.

I loved the western coast, the actual water eating sand coast that met our train tracks. I wrote my secret on a piece of computer paper and stapled it inside itself. I will never think that way again. The saftey is off again. The catch me mechanism that is softer than the steel one's outside of people. An Indian girl with scars on her long smooth ( Read more... )

It was supposed to hurt more when we seperated, but it didn't. After the first flakes fell, when the weather finally turns into winter, they stopped and I wondered why I'd waited so long for this to happen.