A Morning Reminder

[elfowls_nest]

Walked into the Dunkin Donuts this morning to pick up blogger fuel for those beginning their 24-hour marathon. I passed a mother and her maybe 3-year-old son on the way to the counter; the boy gave me an adorable little-stinker grin as I went by. He had a cup of milk in front of him, and a chocolate donut broken into pieces

Comments

[judifilksign]

Once, while I was in the grocery store, my daughter Sparkle, then about four, attempted to "guilt" me into buying some trashy product we never get by throwing a tantrum. She was checking out the disapproving stares of folks around us, and *sure* she had me.

I decided to call her on the assumption that I could be embarrassed into anything. I threw myself on the floor, squalling, hitting the tiles, kicking my feet in the air, rolling, the works. I stopped, and looked at Sparkle. She put the box back. People all around us were laughing their butts off.

A few months later, there was an ad on TV of the same thing happening between a mom and a boy. I must have had twenty links of that ad sent to me.

[adelheid_p]

Great story! I once walked out of a store and went home with my daughter who was probably 2 1/2 because she wouldn't sit in the cart seat and started to throw a tantrum over it. I told her that if she couldn't listen to me when we went into the store then she was too tired to be there and probably needed a nap. (Actually, I think we were both tired. As I recall it was an after work quick trip for a couple of things and I knew I didn't *need* to be there.) I can say that this worked and she didn't do that again.

[elfowls_nest]

And this story is yet another thing to add to the list of sterling examples of why I love you. XD

[adelheid_p]

I just want to point out that if that didn't work before, the kid wouldn't have tried it again. To some extent, it's the parent who created that monster. I respect your wish not to have kids, though. I get that it's not for everybody.

[elfowls_nest]

Very good point, tho' I'm for darn sure he wasn't getting ice cream this morning!

[ericavdg]

Adelheid is absolutely correct. The preoper response to this child would have been, "Then I guess you'll get pretty hungry before lunch." The first time you do this it's living hell until lunch, but the logical consequenses method works really well. Also a properly timed short, swift, swat on the butt when a safety issue is involved, like climbing out of shopping carts. You rarely have to do it twice over the same issu and the kid actually survives quite well. Note that I don't advocate harsh spanking, just enough to get their attention and break the cycle of dangerous behavior. To everyone who reads this, I know YMMV. My child is unscathed and has a strong, quirky personality that definitely wasn't scarred by the occasional slap on the butt.

And an example of bad training that Lydia saw at about age 5: Mother gives in to child whining and throwing tantrum for candy; Lydia says to me, "She just taught him that having a tantrum will get him what he wants!" in a voice full of horror and disbelief.

[elfowls_nest]

The preoper response to this child would have been, "Then I guess you'll get pretty hungry before lunch."

I suspect that's what the end result was (although his mom may have taken his donut out to the car for when he inevitably started whining "I'm huuuungry!").

Also, Lydia has turned out pretty amazing, so I would definitely not argue against your parenting methods! :)

[adelheid_p]

That short, swift, swat (done without anger) is an attention getter and is useful for those times. I once threw a small piece of a vacuum (I was troubleshooting a problem with it) in the general direction my daughter who was crawling with out-stetched hand toward an electrical outlet. I was not throwing it to hit her but I realized that I could not get up and get to her before she got to the outlet so I had to distract her. It did not hit her but did attract her attention and caused her to cry. But she was safe and that was my goal.

[bohemianbrandy]

I have SO many stories, but I will spare you. ;D

(w00tw00t, abstinence~)