The Americans have landed!
Ok so I am back from England! From Equus! From the beer! and it was a total and complete blast! Here are some highlights:
1. Equus: Good play. I can't say it was stunning and there were parts that I was a bit dissappointed in, but overall, I have to say that Daniel did well for being only 17. The part where he is supposed to climax on the horse seemed more like a screaming session rather than orgasmic bliss. At any rate, I wouldn't kick him out of bed. The last ten minutes of the play daniel runs and jumps all around the stage stark ass naked and incredibly angry. Again, I wouldn't kick him out of bed, although, that man had better be a "grower" or very skilled with his fingers. I would be willing to teach him all these skills when he gets like *ahem*, legal and stuff.
2. The pubs: ohhh the beer I drank. I would post pictures but in every single pic I have bloodshot, half-lidded eyes. I was fortunate because my friends are from there so we really got to go to all the local hide outs as opposed to some touristy angus steakhouse in the middle of piccadilly circus. Spent loads of time in Soho AND got to meet Dustin Hoffman. I had no idea the man was a hobbit. Did you?
3. I met Dustin Hoffman and he is by all accounts a hobbit. He just happened to be seeing Equus and I just happened to be standing in front of him. I turned around and BAM! Rainman right behind me (checking out my ass) hanging around (wondering if he should take me out for a drink) wishing I would walk faster so he could get to his car. We had a little small talk and then he left. I got no pic or autograph because (I was pretty wasted and didn't even think about it) I didn't want to bother him or anything like that. Sometimes it hurts deep down inside to be so polite.
4. I saw nearly everything one could possibly see. Walked on the Millenium bridge and wondered aloud, "What is this huge ass body of water drifting below?" To which my English friends replied, "The Thames you stupid twit! What did you think it was? The Atlantic?"
To which I laughed and said, "HAhaha of COURSE I knew that! You silly english people! Soooo, what is up with that big ass clock over there?"
As you can tell, there was a lot of eyerolling going on. In case any of you were concerned, every english person I passed was told not to base their thoughts on Americans by me. Just sayin'.
5. The food: I know english food gets a lot of slack but I LOVE english food. Bangers and mash, the sausages, the beans, and the bread. Give me heaps and heaps of it and I will shove it in my mouth like it's my last supper. I gained 5 POUNDS in England. 5 POUNDS!
6. The accent: I normally pride myself on being able to impersonate any accent. But I have to say I was lovingly called dick van dyke during my entire trip. My friend who went with me is from Boston and all the English said my american accent was twice as heavy as hers. Go figure. Midwest FOREVER!
All in all, it was a great trip! If you have any questions, ask away. I think all the alcohol has finally left my system enough for me to be coherant to respond. I MISSED YOU GUYS!!
1. Equus: Good play. I can't say it was stunning and there were parts that I was a bit dissappointed in, but overall, I have to say that Daniel did well for being only 17. The part where he is supposed to climax on the horse seemed more like a screaming session rather than orgasmic bliss. At any rate, I wouldn't kick him out of bed. The last ten minutes of the play daniel runs and jumps all around the stage stark ass naked and incredibly angry. Again, I wouldn't kick him out of bed, although, that man had better be a "grower" or very skilled with his fingers. I would be willing to teach him all these skills when he gets like *ahem*, legal and stuff.
2. The pubs: ohhh the beer I drank. I would post pictures but in every single pic I have bloodshot, half-lidded eyes. I was fortunate because my friends are from there so we really got to go to all the local hide outs as opposed to some touristy angus steakhouse in the middle of piccadilly circus. Spent loads of time in Soho AND got to meet Dustin Hoffman. I had no idea the man was a hobbit. Did you?
3. I met Dustin Hoffman and he is by all accounts a hobbit. He just happened to be seeing Equus and I just happened to be standing in front of him. I turned around and BAM! Rainman right behind me (checking out my ass) hanging around (wondering if he should take me out for a drink) wishing I would walk faster so he could get to his car. We had a little small talk and then he left. I got no pic or autograph because (I was pretty wasted and didn't even think about it) I didn't want to bother him or anything like that. Sometimes it hurts deep down inside to be so polite.
4. I saw nearly everything one could possibly see. Walked on the Millenium bridge and wondered aloud, "What is this huge ass body of water drifting below?" To which my English friends replied, "The Thames you stupid twit! What did you think it was? The Atlantic?"
To which I laughed and said, "HAhaha of COURSE I knew that! You silly english people! Soooo, what is up with that big ass clock over there?"
As you can tell, there was a lot of eyerolling going on. In case any of you were concerned, every english person I passed was told not to base their thoughts on Americans by me. Just sayin'.
5. The food: I know english food gets a lot of slack but I LOVE english food. Bangers and mash, the sausages, the beans, and the bread. Give me heaps and heaps of it and I will shove it in my mouth like it's my last supper. I gained 5 POUNDS in England. 5 POUNDS!
6. The accent: I normally pride myself on being able to impersonate any accent. But I have to say I was lovingly called dick van dyke during my entire trip. My friend who went with me is from Boston and all the English said my american accent was twice as heavy as hers. Go figure. Midwest FOREVER!
All in all, it was a great trip! If you have any questions, ask away. I think all the alcohol has finally left my system enough for me to be coherant to respond. I MISSED YOU GUYS!!