Revolutionary Drabble
Daddy Dragon
The Revolutionaries led by the dark and mysterious Dragon were a diverse and motley group. The only thing they truly shared in common was an undying dedication to their goal of bringing down the despotic World Government…and the unspoken agreement that lunch breaks were an absolute must as a means of loosening up and exchanging gossip.
"Alright. Eleven Supernovas: which of them would you do?" Ren asked the group, smirking behind her lopsided goggles. An insatiable pyromaniac demolitions expert with a flair for endless destruction, Ren easily found her place in the Revolutionary army doing arson, sabotage, and general large-scale explosions. Most of the Revolutionaries treated her with bemused fondness. After all, who else but an insane twelve-year-old would be willing and able to slip in and out of enemy strongholds with seconds to spare before they exploded into rubble?
"X Drake." Peg replied immediately. The weathered ex-Marine was the veteran and de facto leader of the small team. She turned patiently the next victim.
"Seriously, there's only one girl in that group. That's hardly a fair question." Ein said cynically. Peg just held his gaze, not exactly an easy thing to do given that there was about three feet height's difference between them sitting down. At last the bass tuna fishman huffed and muttered, "Fine. I'd do the long-arm, Scratchman Apoo. Happy?"
"Trafalgar Law." Tori said with a small blush. The shy girl was actually a top-level assassin, absolutely deadly with knives and the ability to go almost anywhere undetected. Her mousy appearance and crippling shyness often threw people off, all the better for her job but hell for her love life.
"Me? Straw Hat Luffy." Vin smirked. They all stared at him deadpan.
"What?" He snapped defensively, "Don't tell me you never thought of it!"
"You do realize he's a guy and under eighteen besides, right?" Peg asked with a slight disapproving frown.
"But he's got the rubber fruit! Do you realize how flexible that makes you? Any position, any way, anytime?" Vin's leer deepened, "I bet the kid doesn't even have a gag-reflex…"
He suddenly noticed the entire group had gone silent and were staring somewhere behind him. A sudden chill ran down his spine as he slowly turned to face a dark cloak. His gaze traveled upward to a stern, tattooed face half-hidden by a dark and drab hood.
"Mr. Vin." Dragon's quiet voice was as chilling as a death knell, "A word, if you please."
"Been nice knowing you, buddy." Ein muttered as the pale and shaking Revolutionary slowly got up and followed their grim leader out of the common room.
"What's his deal?" Ren asked, staring curiously after the departing figures, "Is gay talk suddenly bad for morale?"
"Nah, it's probably about Vin's using his skills with Den Den Mushi to intercept porn." Peg waved off her concerns, "He'll be fine. Hell, Dragon never had any problems with Ivankov and you wouldn't believe some of the stuff that crazy okama-"
A blood-curling shriek abruptly brought all conversation in the common room to a screeching halt. Vin flew head-over-heels into the room and flopped back to his seat at the lunch table, looking as though a sea king had just turned him into a chew toy.
"What is that guy's problem?" He snarled, "One small comment about a stupid pirate and now he's sending me off to liberate the armpit of the world after chewing me out about 'keeping my mind out of the gutter!' Jeez, you'd think the kid was his son or something!"
"Oh c'mon, Vin!" Ein rolled his bulbous eyes, "What are the chances of that?"
Three weeks later…
The group stared in stunned disbelief at the screen. Flickering images of the great battle at Marineford which would ultimately determine the fate of the world continued to flash across the screen, courtesy of the Intercepting Den Den Mushi Vin had managed to set up even in this dank hellhole.
"Son of bitch." Ren's mouth gaped open in shock, letting a few kernels of popcorn heedlessly drop out.
"Oh God," Vin just moaned and put his head in his hands, "Kill me now."
Yes, as Smoker found out the hard way, Dragon is one protective daddy! It's actually kind of sweet that Luffy is one of the few things that makes Dragon honest-to-God smile! I figure that one or two people would actually theorize exactly what kind of naughty things one could do with a rubber man, but God help the poor sod that would say something like that within Dragon's earshot!