just open up and sing.
the social network. mark/eduardo. pg. 1390 words.
mark misses the signs of eduardo's presence in his life. or alternatively, mark drinks mountain dew, reads post-its, and misses eduardo.
notes: i have to thank kla, so very very much. i seem to only be able to write when i'm talking to you. the title and cut text is from marina and the diamonds' song i am not a robot which is one of my favorite songs. you can listen to it
here.
also available (and capitalized) on
ao3.
it doesn't happen all that often anymore. which is something he's grateful for, mark can admit to himself. it used to be five or six times a day.
once or twice a week isn't too bad in comparison.
.
mark's been wired in for at least twelve hours. eduardo knows since he was last in the room that amount of time ago. the only difference is the row of mountain dew bottles that eduardo had left on the desk, now empty.
eduardo sighs as he sets down his bag. he gets a clean plate from the kitchenette and places the sandwich he bought for mark next to his laptop with a bottle of aquafina. no more caffeinated drinks for now, he thinks as he brushes mark's shoulder with the tips of two fingers.
he settles into the couch for a couple more hours of studying before heading back to his room.
.
sometimes mark finds himself reaching to the side to grasp a drink only to find that the one he had on his desk is empty. he knows that he can walk across the office floor to get a new one from the open kitchen or just ask his assistant to leave him more than one at a time.
but there's a sudden, sharp pain he feels when he picks up an empty plastic bottle or sees a sandwich sitting on his desk still in its packaging.
it hurts. but it's better than nothing at all.
.
eduardo's had three midterms in the past two days so he's pretty much been living between his dorm and the library. when his final class lets out he heads over to kirkland, if only for the change of pace.
he sees mark settled in at his desk when he walks in. he's hunched over his laptop with the desktop also glowing. eduardo would be more shocked if he wasn't there, really. he walks over and says a quick hello, hand against worn soft cotton.
mark is focused on his task but he still nods his head and lets out a "wardo" in response. eduardo smiles as he sees a chinese take-out container next to a crumpled post-it by his computer.
please remember to eat or my face will be like this:
DDDDD:
do you want that, mark? do you?
.
mark thinks about ordering in when he arrives home after seventeen hours in the offices. but it was one of his new year's resolutions to make use of his kitchen so he makes a simple tomato pasta dinner instead. the thought comes as he's saran-wrapping leftover onion and placing it into the vegetable crisper.
the post-it notes had always seemed a bit ridiculous. the one time that eduardo would use emoticons, always written down on paper with five uppercase d's and a colon.
mark had never realized the extent of their presence in his life until he really looked around his home. there were no post-its stick to the refrigerator or on his desk, covering his keyboard or even on his forehead on occasion.
(
please remember you have a test today or my face will be like this:
DDDDD:
would you wish that on me? that's just not nice.
please remember to call your mom like you promised or my face will be like this:
DDDDD:
she keeps calling me to ask if your you're dead. so please, call her. thanks.
please remember you need sleep to survive or my face will be like this:
DDDDD:
when i'm at your funeral.
)
mark has been awake for the past thirty-six hours and coding for the past fifteen straight when chris comes in. he gently taps mark on the shoulder to get his attention.
mark freezes, muscles stiff, as he lets out a soft, shocked syllable. he shakes his head and takes a deep breath. he blinks and slowly focuses on chris.
"come on, man," he says. "it's time for us both to head home, yeah. we're the last two here. and you know, big meeting tomorrow."
mark nods and packs up his things, shrugging his left shoulder. he'd never been one to enjoy being touched even at the best of times. he's been told that there's something standoffish about his personality though so he's never really had to deal with it. with the exception of eduardo, however.
it had taken awhile to get used to eduardo's gestures: the comforting hand on his shoulder, the guiding hand on the back of his neck, their feet crossing on the coffee table. eduardo stroking his shoulder with two fingers in hello and an occasional hug and brush of lips on his temple whispering goodbye.
.
the shareholders' meeting officially begins at three pm with refreshments set out for people who want a snack or a late lunch.
mark is in his office by seven am. there are already people bustling about setting up for later or at their computers. he works steadily until there's a loud knock on the door. dustin waves and points down the hall. "everyone's here, man."
he double, triple-checks that everything is saved before walking with dustin. it doesn't take long to notice that something is wrong.
"what's going on?" he asks. dustin is a fidgeter on a normal day. but today his hands are wringing and he keeps popping his knuckles before shoving his hands into his pockets then back out again.
dustin opens and closes his mouth, a tilt to his lips like he's not sure whether to smile hesitantly or frown. he struggles for a moment longer. "you--you'll see in a moment, i guess."
the first thing mark notices with they step inside the conference room is the smell of coffee. it's strong enough to make him feel a bit nauseated due to his lack of sleep. he takes a few deep breaths through his mouth and his stomach calms.
the second thing he notices is eduardo. mark feels his stomach plummeting again. he's always sent a proxy to these meetings before.
mark shifts as dustin touches his forearm to guide him to the front of the room. eduardo doesn't notice him, too busy hunched over and typing into his blackberry. he doesn't intend to do it. but when he passes by eduardo, he brushes his fingers along the fine wool covering his shoulder blade. he quickly pulls his hand back when he feels eduardo stiffen but he doesn't look at him until he's seated at the head of the room.
eduardo doesn't look at him though. he's staring down at his hand, clenching his fingers and relaxing them as if trying to shake off a phantom ache.
mark surreptitiously watches him throughout the entire meeting. however, once the meeting is adjourned eduardo immediately stands and leaves the room before anyone can stop and speak to him.
he's not disappointed, mark tells himself as he heads back to his office and settles in for a long evening in front of his computer. his assistant seems to sense this and brings in a bottle of mountain dew.
it's however many hours later that mark looks up to see the office empty and the lights dimmed for the evening. he reaches for the last drink that his assistant placed on his desk before she must have left for the day. he's surprised when he feels paper and a full bottle.
please take a break or my face will be like this:
DDDDD:
i'd like to talk.
mark turns on his desk lamp and sees eduardo through the reflection on his monitor. he's sitting on the couch that chris and dustin had insisted he keep in his office for when he passes out from sleep exhaustion. he's just calmly watching him.
mark swallows, unsure of what to say. he finally settles on, "i'd thought you'd gone."
"no," eduardo says. mark watches his adam's apple bob as he stands up. "no," he repeats and places his hand, all five fingers and his palm, on mark's shoulder. "i'm here."
this had the working title kla's coffee prompt. the initial idea being that mark notices the absence the little things that eduardo did in his life-- like make him coffee. somehow that didn't show up but i hope it's still okay. :D this is pre-slash more than anything. i like the idea that they were never actually together at harvard although they both had ~feelings that they didn't know how to express but read it however you want. i'd love to think i'll write more of this but dissertation! ack. seriously, i'm such a bad procrastinator. i'd feel ashamed of myself if i weren't so lazy.
♥