Comments | elricmas: For Wiccy: Reckoning

herongale in elricmas

For Wiccy: Reckoning

Dec 26, 2007 06:10

To: wiccat
From: Santa
Request: Hoho and Envy or Greed and Envy.
Rating: PG-13
Title: Reckoning

( Memories. Dried, dead memories, like grains for the harvest and dust floating off to the heavens. Memories turned to ash and blown away by the years. )

Comments 6

eli_artemisia December 27 2007, 02:23:03 UTC

what man might conceive of a rotting soul that had lived on for centuries, until his emotions had shifted and his mind had exceeded reason, or a soulless demon who personified evil itself and who could become a beast or a bird or a beloved friend, identifiable only by its uncaring eyes?

And yet they, the gods and demons, were dying.

You draw such a fitting comparison/contrast between Hohenheim and Envy. I especially love how, right after this quoted passage, you state that they are both "nothing more than human" As depressing an end to their story as this is, it is also entirely appropriate. Very nicely done! *weeps for Envy*

Much Love,
Marysia

sky_dark December 27 2007, 02:51:15 UTC

Wow, that was hurty and sad. I hate feeling sorry for Envy!

arrayking December 27 2007, 14:01:13 UTC

This is very interesting. I particularly enjoyed the exchange in which Hoenhiem said he left in order to give Envy something to hate because he needed hatred to live. I didn't get as much anger of Envy as I expected, but then perhaps Envy was having a hard time holding onto it, here at the cusp of his victory. I did feel some regret for both of them at the end.

velvet_mace December 27 2007, 20:57:46 UTC

The Envy/Hohenheim dynamic is just painful. Hohenheim is so cold and his sympathy smacks of too little too late; and Envy is both unloved and unlovable.

dreamer1789 December 29 2007, 10:37:34 UTC

Big wow factor! ;)

Hohenheim had been a whole person once, before Envy’s creation had taken most of his soul-the part of his soul that hated. The part of his soul that envied. The part of his soul that had gone into its personality. I really like this idea of having part of the soul stripped in exchange. ^^

“The irony is that my proclamation eventually came true. The gift my son gave me will indeed prove useful in my alchemy.” Brilliant, and in a way so very sad.

And yet they, the gods and demons, were dying. Good comparison, especially since you point out later, that they are nothing but humans in they end.

The closing lines were awesome too. ^^ They might seem trivial, but they mean so much.

Wonderful piece of work! :)

hieronymousb December 30 2007, 05:38:30 UTC

A bit late, but this was my fic, and I really appreciate your comment. :) You gave a thorough review with some precise commentary, which I always enjoy receiving. This story was a little experimental for me, in certain ways, so I'm glad it worked well for you. Means a lot to me. :D Thank you so much!