Fic: Descant (chapter 11A)
Title: Descant (Chapter 11A)
Rating: R
Characters: Kara/Leoben, Helo, Caprica, Hera, & more
Word Count (this chapter): 1,304
WARNINGS: Non-canon character death. Canon-level violence and themes of suicide.
Chapter 10
Chapter 11A
Lights surround him. A feeling of wholeness.
The first thing he thinks is that he can think. The next thing he thinks is that she’ll be waiting for him, and so he opens his eyes.
Reality is too much to contain. He’s in a resurrection tub, back among a field of bodies, reborn once more. A Three approaches, a towel in her arms and curiosity on her face. Leoben closes his eyes. Kara’s still gone. He sinks back into the fluid, breathes deep.
Even in the darkness of death he’s not dead. The world is lit by the same five glowing figures he saw before, reaching out to him, offering him something.
He comes awake with a gasp.
Leoben isn’t sure how many times he dies before Cavil and the others decide to stop him, but suddenly he finds that he’s being held, five Simons securing his limbs and head, immobilizing him before he can drown. Working together they lift him from the tub, strap him down onto some kind of gurney. Struggle as he might, he’s alive.
Cavil comes to ask sharp-edged questions sometimes, or D’Anna to try to charm him. Simon draws blood and inserts IVs, keeping him alive. Doral stares, frowning, from the doorway.
It comes to Leoben after a while that he’s alive because he deserves this, that he misunderstood his purpose and hers and this is how God is punishing him. He thinks of Kara then, and can’t hold back the tears that slide down his cheeks at the memory of her defying God’s violence, at the thought of her in his arms promising her love.
He whimpers through his tears for hours or maybe days before falling silent. His life is empty without her, the stream a faint trickle in the back of his mind. It doesn’t matter anymore.
Soon enough Cavil grows tired of him. He shakes his head at Leoben during one of their sessions. “You could have been so much more than this,” he says scornfully. “Well, frak. You might as well wait with the others until I have time to program you more effectively.”
And suddenly Leoben finds himself hoisted through the baseship by a pair of Dorals and deposited, finally, in a large chamber. The door slams shut and locks from the outside. He lays there, motionless.
Behind him someone walks quickly across the floor, kneels down and cradles his head in her hands. For just a moment the touch reminds him of her.
“What did he do to you?” Ellen asks, and Leoben finally opens his eyes.
The stream stabs through him and he’s flooded with a sense of recognition he can’t quite make sense of.
“It’s alright, it’s alright,” she whispers. “It’s a mental block, just breathe through it.”
Leoben gasps for breath as the pain recedes and blinks up at her in confusion.
“There you go,” Ellen says softly, stroking his cheek lightly. “It’s me. I’ve got you now.”
He still can’t make sense of it. Then Sam steps into view and hope flares. “Is Kara here?” he asks urgently, his vocal chords raw with disuse.
“Kara?” Sam asks, bewildered.
The world falls apart again.
“Well, come here,” Tyrol mutters, and strides toward them across the long room, hauling Leoben to his feet and depositing him on one of the cots arranged together in one corner. Ellen drops next to him and the others arrange themselves in a loose circle.
“I don’t understand,” Leoben says roughly. The world seems to be spinning around him; everything feels off kilter.
“We’re Cylons,” Saul says brusquely. “We’re what’s left of the thirteenth tribe.”
He stares.
“Stop it, Saul,” Ellen chastises. “He doesn’t remember.” She turns toward Leoben, smiling affectionately. She opens her mouth, then stops. “What do you remember?”
Leoben shakes his head, trying to clear it. “You died. On New Caprica. Natalie told the others you had been frakking Cavil and you went into the compound and helped us reach Galactica...” He trails off when he sees Ellen’s face tense, her gaze dropping to her knees.
“Of course you’d remember that,” she says, her pleasant tone suddenly forced.
Leoben turns to the others. “And the rest of you. You all died--”
“Before the last resurrection ship went offline,” Sam finishes.
The pain in his head is back. You’re Cylons, he wants to say, but he can’t make the words leave his lips.
“Just in time for Cavil to lock us up and make us rebuild the frakking technology,” Tory says sourly. Tyrol reaches over to squeeze her shoulder.
“You’re the final--” Leoben starts, and then the world goes black.
He wakes to the sound of voices drifting over him.
“If he’s here, that means the humans are still out there! Bill might be--”
“Frak, Saul, you don’t have to tell us where your priorities are!”
“Listen, guys, just relax until he can tell us what he knows!”
“Remember what the angel said!”
“He’s waking up.”
Leoben opens his eyes. The pain has faded to a dull throb, and as he nudges it gently with his mind he finds memories he’s never had before: these five, crowding around him as he was born; watching his siblings’ souls pulled from the stream; Cavil killing Daniel, and then him, too. He sighs as he looks around at his parents. “You’re the final five Cylons,” he says, and this time the pain is barely a twinge.
Ellen smiles and Tory nods. “We are,” Ellen tells him. “We’re glad to see you.”
“How’s the fleet?” Saul asks abruptly.
Leoben shifts on the cot to look at him. “Lee and Boomer stayed back on New Caprica to manage the colony after you helped Galactica and Pegasus come back. Natalie and Adama and Roslin took Galactica off to find Earth.”
Silence falls over the room. Saul’s face is suddenly drawn and blank. Leoben turns slowly to find the others frozen as well. Sam’s eyes are closed; Tyrol looks bereft. The women both look on the verge of tears. And suddenly there’s something pressing at the back of his mind, something else Leoben should know. “Tell me,” he says, already mournful.
Ellen settles by his knee, rests her hand on his shoulder. “We’re from Earth. The five of us.” She sees the surprise on his face and winces. “When the other tribes left Kobol, the thirteenth tribe, the Cylons, we went to Earth. And then we made our own robots, intelligent life to do our bidding. And during the war we fought with them we nuked our planet into ash.” Through her touch he watches the war play out as she saw it, the violent explosions, the frantic efforts to create resurrection.
Leoben stares at her as the visions recede, fighting back the growing realization of what’s happened. It comes anyway. He made Kara leave New Caprica to find Earth. She flew into that storm because he wanted to reach Earth. And it was only ever a dream. He’s falling into the darkness, into the singularity. She gone and the world has always been layer upon layer of lies. He turns away and closes his eyes, and doesn’t open them again.
As the world around him fades Leoben dives into the stream, into himself, looking for the moment that the lie began. He relives every encounter they ever had, from Kara first torturing him until she lay trustingly in his arms. Then he pushes back further, into her childhood, into the early years of her mother’s anger. He feels every broken bone along with little Kara, every prayer.
Back in the cell with the others, Leoben gasps for breath as his body fades with dehydration. Then suddenly his face contorts with joy. As he dies again, he’s laughing. She’s back.
Chapter 11B
Rating: R
Characters: Kara/Leoben, Helo, Caprica, Hera, & more
Word Count (this chapter): 1,304
WARNINGS: Non-canon character death. Canon-level violence and themes of suicide.
Chapter 10
Chapter 11A
Lights surround him. A feeling of wholeness.
The first thing he thinks is that he can think. The next thing he thinks is that she’ll be waiting for him, and so he opens his eyes.
Reality is too much to contain. He’s in a resurrection tub, back among a field of bodies, reborn once more. A Three approaches, a towel in her arms and curiosity on her face. Leoben closes his eyes. Kara’s still gone. He sinks back into the fluid, breathes deep.
Even in the darkness of death he’s not dead. The world is lit by the same five glowing figures he saw before, reaching out to him, offering him something.
He comes awake with a gasp.
Leoben isn’t sure how many times he dies before Cavil and the others decide to stop him, but suddenly he finds that he’s being held, five Simons securing his limbs and head, immobilizing him before he can drown. Working together they lift him from the tub, strap him down onto some kind of gurney. Struggle as he might, he’s alive.
Cavil comes to ask sharp-edged questions sometimes, or D’Anna to try to charm him. Simon draws blood and inserts IVs, keeping him alive. Doral stares, frowning, from the doorway.
It comes to Leoben after a while that he’s alive because he deserves this, that he misunderstood his purpose and hers and this is how God is punishing him. He thinks of Kara then, and can’t hold back the tears that slide down his cheeks at the memory of her defying God’s violence, at the thought of her in his arms promising her love.
He whimpers through his tears for hours or maybe days before falling silent. His life is empty without her, the stream a faint trickle in the back of his mind. It doesn’t matter anymore.
Soon enough Cavil grows tired of him. He shakes his head at Leoben during one of their sessions. “You could have been so much more than this,” he says scornfully. “Well, frak. You might as well wait with the others until I have time to program you more effectively.”
And suddenly Leoben finds himself hoisted through the baseship by a pair of Dorals and deposited, finally, in a large chamber. The door slams shut and locks from the outside. He lays there, motionless.
Behind him someone walks quickly across the floor, kneels down and cradles his head in her hands. For just a moment the touch reminds him of her.
“What did he do to you?” Ellen asks, and Leoben finally opens his eyes.
The stream stabs through him and he’s flooded with a sense of recognition he can’t quite make sense of.
“It’s alright, it’s alright,” she whispers. “It’s a mental block, just breathe through it.”
Leoben gasps for breath as the pain recedes and blinks up at her in confusion.
“There you go,” Ellen says softly, stroking his cheek lightly. “It’s me. I’ve got you now.”
He still can’t make sense of it. Then Sam steps into view and hope flares. “Is Kara here?” he asks urgently, his vocal chords raw with disuse.
“Kara?” Sam asks, bewildered.
The world falls apart again.
“Well, come here,” Tyrol mutters, and strides toward them across the long room, hauling Leoben to his feet and depositing him on one of the cots arranged together in one corner. Ellen drops next to him and the others arrange themselves in a loose circle.
“I don’t understand,” Leoben says roughly. The world seems to be spinning around him; everything feels off kilter.
“We’re Cylons,” Saul says brusquely. “We’re what’s left of the thirteenth tribe.”
He stares.
“Stop it, Saul,” Ellen chastises. “He doesn’t remember.” She turns toward Leoben, smiling affectionately. She opens her mouth, then stops. “What do you remember?”
Leoben shakes his head, trying to clear it. “You died. On New Caprica. Natalie told the others you had been frakking Cavil and you went into the compound and helped us reach Galactica...” He trails off when he sees Ellen’s face tense, her gaze dropping to her knees.
“Of course you’d remember that,” she says, her pleasant tone suddenly forced.
Leoben turns to the others. “And the rest of you. You all died--”
“Before the last resurrection ship went offline,” Sam finishes.
The pain in his head is back. You’re Cylons, he wants to say, but he can’t make the words leave his lips.
“Just in time for Cavil to lock us up and make us rebuild the frakking technology,” Tory says sourly. Tyrol reaches over to squeeze her shoulder.
“You’re the final--” Leoben starts, and then the world goes black.
He wakes to the sound of voices drifting over him.
“If he’s here, that means the humans are still out there! Bill might be--”
“Frak, Saul, you don’t have to tell us where your priorities are!”
“Listen, guys, just relax until he can tell us what he knows!”
“Remember what the angel said!”
“He’s waking up.”
Leoben opens his eyes. The pain has faded to a dull throb, and as he nudges it gently with his mind he finds memories he’s never had before: these five, crowding around him as he was born; watching his siblings’ souls pulled from the stream; Cavil killing Daniel, and then him, too. He sighs as he looks around at his parents. “You’re the final five Cylons,” he says, and this time the pain is barely a twinge.
Ellen smiles and Tory nods. “We are,” Ellen tells him. “We’re glad to see you.”
“How’s the fleet?” Saul asks abruptly.
Leoben shifts on the cot to look at him. “Lee and Boomer stayed back on New Caprica to manage the colony after you helped Galactica and Pegasus come back. Natalie and Adama and Roslin took Galactica off to find Earth.”
Silence falls over the room. Saul’s face is suddenly drawn and blank. Leoben turns slowly to find the others frozen as well. Sam’s eyes are closed; Tyrol looks bereft. The women both look on the verge of tears. And suddenly there’s something pressing at the back of his mind, something else Leoben should know. “Tell me,” he says, already mournful.
Ellen settles by his knee, rests her hand on his shoulder. “We’re from Earth. The five of us.” She sees the surprise on his face and winces. “When the other tribes left Kobol, the thirteenth tribe, the Cylons, we went to Earth. And then we made our own robots, intelligent life to do our bidding. And during the war we fought with them we nuked our planet into ash.” Through her touch he watches the war play out as she saw it, the violent explosions, the frantic efforts to create resurrection.
Leoben stares at her as the visions recede, fighting back the growing realization of what’s happened. It comes anyway. He made Kara leave New Caprica to find Earth. She flew into that storm because he wanted to reach Earth. And it was only ever a dream. He’s falling into the darkness, into the singularity. She gone and the world has always been layer upon layer of lies. He turns away and closes his eyes, and doesn’t open them again.
As the world around him fades Leoben dives into the stream, into himself, looking for the moment that the lie began. He relives every encounter they ever had, from Kara first torturing him until she lay trustingly in his arms. Then he pushes back further, into her childhood, into the early years of her mother’s anger. He feels every broken bone along with little Kara, every prayer.
Back in the cell with the others, Leoben gasps for breath as his body fades with dehydration. Then suddenly his face contorts with joy. As he dies again, he’s laughing. She’s back.
Chapter 11B