Disenchanted XII, part III
Shun laid face down on his bed.
Discouraged. Disheartened. Dispirited.
Fluctuating between upset and despondent, he hid his face in his pillow.
This sucked. This house sucked. This whole village sucked. His life sucked. Shun snivelled, balling his little hands into fists. He just wanted things to go back to normal. His life in Suna now felt like a distant dream, a bittersweet, tantalizing taste of better days that were never real. He just wanted his family back. Why was that so difficult? Why did things have to change? This wasn't fair!
Shun hated it here. He hated it. He hated it more than he had ever hated anything. He hated that stupid Sausage who brainwashed his chichiue and made his otousan leave. He hates Chi for not making a fuss. He hated his otousan for leaving in the first place. And right about now, he even hated his chichiue for falling under the Sausage's spell. He hated it all.
Shun was fuming on his bed, sporadically banging his head against the pillow in frustration, when the door to his room suddenly slid open, revealing a volatile aura, electrifying the air.
The harsh scolding was right at the tip of Sasuke's tongue, when he caught a glimpse of the boy's misty eyes glinting in the dim lighting of the room. The boy had been crying, Sasuke considered uncomfortably, unsure what to do in such a situation.
“Get up,” Sasuke barked after clearing his throat, glaring at the little brat, wallowing on the bed. He'd opt for another route then.
Shun didn't deign the intruder with an answer and just 'hmped', turning his head away.
“Get up, now,” the captain bit out loudly, clenching his fists to his sides. Even when he tried to play nice ,the boy was still testing his patience.
“What's going on here?” Naruto frowned, sizing up Sasuke. He'd just placed Chinatsu in bed when he heard Sasuke's unmistakable deep rumble. He peeked inside, the boy was pouting in bed. He stared questioningly at Sasuke, who in turn ignored him.
“Shun, get. Up,” Sasuke exaggeratedly enunciated through clenched teeth.
But Shun didn't budge and Naruto kept staring at him, unyielding, with those big, questioning eyes. He was being made to look like a fool and that was one (of the many) thing(s) Sasuke could not stand for.
“We're going training,” he reluctantly supplied, clicking his tongue in aggravation. He couldn't even get his own kid to get out of bed without Naruto's involvement. Some great parent he was making. Sasuke huffed, irate.
“He just got back, Sasuke,” Naruto tried to reason when Sasuke threw him a scourging glare; it dawned on him in that moment how the captain's pride must be withering from Shun's inattention. He sighed, turning back to the lump in bed. “Shun.” A moment passed. “Shun,”he tried again. “Shunny, adults are speaking to you right now,” he called out softly, but was not acknowledged by the boy. “Shunny is a good boy, isn't he? Come on, big boy. You want to be a great ninja? That starts with training. Shunny, baby―”
“I'm not a baby!” Shun finally mumbled into his pillow, eliciting a grin from Naruto.
“If you're not a baby then you won't need me to help you get up, right?” he coaxed and surely enough, Shun reluctantly pushed himself up in a sitting position. Naruto smiled, waggling his index finger in a 'come hither' motion and Shun sighed, defeated.
He begrudgingly got off the bed and wadded towards his beloved chichiue, a frown marring his baby face. Naruto ruffled the already messy jet black tuft of hair adoringly.
“Woah, Shunny is such a good boy,” Naruto praised with starry eyes and Sasuke scoffed at the whole exchange. Here he was rewarding the belligerent boy who was nothing but disrespectful and difficult. The boy had ran away with his kid sister and here Naruto was treating him like a prince?! No wonder the boy was spoiled, Sasuke rolled his eyes. He wouldn't admit though that while he found Naruto's methods to be too soft and illogical, in the end that's what got the boy to budge.
“Where are you going?” Sasuke frowned, watching the duo walk away.
“To watch Shun train,” Naruto answered matter-of-factly, not sparing the captain a glance.
“That won't be necessary,” Sasuke dismissed.
“Sorry, but you're not going to win this one,” Naruto playfully grinned over his shoulder, his blue eyes glinting with determination, and in that moment Sasuke knew he had lost the argument.
“Are you checking up on me?” Sasuke demanded, and while he tried to be incensed, it ended up sounding too flat. Damn, he was losing all sorts of fights today. One day with kids in his house and he was already softening up?
“He's a kid. Don't push him too hard,” Naruto warned as Shun ran down the stairs.
“I know how to train children. I was a goddamn Academy teacher's assistant before my captain days,” Sasuke clicked his tongue and Naruto looked back, a teasing simper on his lips.
“Unfortunately, I remember, which is precisely why I have to make sure you won't do something stupid.”
Sasuke frowned.
XXX
The boy was undoubtedly an Uchiha, Sasuke marvelled watching the boy suavely fling the kunais and hit all the targets on his very first attempt. He almost allowed himself a small, prideful smile, before he caught himself. The kid already had too much of an ego and he knew that Fugaku, were he still alive, would never approve of lulling a child into a false sense of greatness.
They were in the training grounds right behind the complex, Chinatsu's window visible, were she to unduly awaken.
Naruto whopped, pumping his fist in the air. He was sitting on a tree stump, watching Shun go with wonderment in his eyes.
“Shunny is so amazing!”
Sasuke nodded approvingly, “As expected of my son.”
Shun abruptly dropped the kunai, glaring at Sasuke threw his damp bangs.
“I am not you son,” he said thickly, causing Sasuke's eye to twitch.
Goodness, the boy was dense.
“Yes. You. Are,” Sasuke bit out in a clipped tone, slowly punctuating each word. “I am your otousan, you are an Uchiha, and The Sharingan,” Sasuke explained carefully, as though speaking to a challenged baby, his Mangekyou swirling in his eyes, “is the most powerful kekkai genkai.”
“You are not my otousan,” Shun retorted disinterestedly, not paying attention to a word that came out of the captain's mouth. Sasuke narrowed his eyes, his scant supply of patience reaching its breaking point.
“You little br―”
“How about we try some friendly sparring, mhmm?” Naruto quickly intervened, injecting as much enthusiasm as possible into his words as he stood between the two raging Uchihas.
Neither said a word, but the look of steel determination mirrored on both Uchihas' face as they glared at each other indicated that they had accepted the challenge. Naruto's body tensed in spasm, before his muscles released, relief coursing through him as though he has just diffused a bomb. Naruto passed a hand through his mop of blonde. These stubborn Uchihas, they were going to be the death of him... He shook his head.
'I will make you understand,' was the mantra in Sasuke's head as he circled around the training ground, his eyes never leaving the little boy.
'I will not bow to you,' Shun clenched his fists, ready to break the Sausage.
Shun lunged first, without even following proper sparring etiquette. Sasuke frowned as he effortlessly sidestepped the clumsy attack. Did the kid not even know how to spar? He formed the seals in a deliberate, slow motion to match the boy's pace and allow him to counter-attack. But as Shun was barely able to dodge the Katon that singed the ends of his hair, it became quickly obvious that Shun's movements were sub-par for a boy his age. Sure, the boy was fast and he had great aim, but his movements were clumsy, all over the place. He was running for the sake of running, there was no purpose in his actions, aside from blind rage. He kept firing katon after katon and the boy kept barely escaping, Shun's own attacks being way off mark. Kids who first entered the Academy weren't particularly strong in taijutsu or basic ninjutsu, but even they had honed some basic skills at home.
“Sasuke! You have to go easy on him!” Naruto cried out worriedly as he watched the man repeatedly attack Shun. He watched Shun's poor performance with dismay. He had to intervene, the bastard was going to seriously injure their son at this rate. “Shun has never sparred before!”
“What?!” Sasuke exploded, dropping out of his fighting stance, his eyes wide, “You didn't even teach him the basics of sparring? What have you and that dimwit Sai been doing with my kid all this time?!”
“MY OTOUSAN IS NOT A DIMWIT!” Shun suddenly shrieked, his voice tight with pain, the high pitch almost eardrum-bursting, surprising both Naruto and Sasuke, who had forgotten that Shun was only a mere steps away.
The chakra began leaking in buckets, a red, stifling hot glow surrounding the boy. It bubbled out of Shun in a suffocating amount, the scorching aura engulfing the field.
Sasuke's eyes widened in recognition. He had felt a similar overbearing chakra before. Scalding. Hot. It burns.
“This is―”
Naruto gaped, slapping a hand to his mouth, “No, no.”
Shun opened his eyes, the Sharingan slowly spinning in them, bloodied and cruel. The boy balled his fists, fangs protruding out of his mouth. He didn't even look like a little boy anymore. He was an animal. Shun growled, it rumbled out of his throat, a low, grotesque grunt.
“What the fuck is happening?” Sasuke managed to bite out, bewildered. “This is Kyuubi's...?”
Naruto swallowed, his face stricken with fear. He nodded slowly, “I... It... It feels like it. This has never happened before.”
“YOU ARE NOT MY OTOUSAN!” the creature howled at the top of his lungs, the sound inhumane, his dark purple eyes piercing through Sasuke like a vortex of agony. “I want my otousan back! I want my family back! Give him back! Give my otousan back! Give him back right now! Give me my family back!” he wheezed out and Sasuke stood frozen still, his throat closing up as he stared. The hate oozed out of the boy in sizzling waves and it was all aimed at him. Sasuke couldn't breathe.
Naruto lunged at Shun, immobilizing the boy's clawed hands in his fists. Shun fought back, scratching Naruto's face. The cut stung, but Naruto's face was stone cold as he closed his eyes tapping in Kyuubi's chakra and letting it seep into his arms. The boy was no match for him, his wrists bound in Naruto's grasp. He tilted the boy's chin with his other hand so that they were eye to eye. Shun's Sharingan had mutated into a vermilion, bestial colour.
“Shh, Shun, baby, that's enough,” Naruto spoke softly, but audibly.
“IT'S NOT FAIR!” Shun cried out, his throat burning raw from abuse. “Why are you doing this me?! Why?! W-WHY?” his breath hitched, his vocal cords sore as he tried to push his chichiue off. Tears began tumbling down his face, his face contorted in agony.
Sasuke clenched his jaw, looking away as his heart sank to his knees. What can you possibly do when your child is crying for someone else?
Naruto poured chakra into his fingers and soothingly rubbed circles in the hysterical boy's back. He ached to the very bone because his son, his darling baby was in so much pain. And it was all because of him. “You said we'd see him everyday! You p-promised!”
The boy snivelled, his eyes swollen and squinted shut as he sobbed. He wailed and wailed and wailed, his body wracking with violent sobs. As much as he tried to stop it or to get a hold of himself, he just couldn't. Shun didn't want to be some weakling. Boys don't cry. Shinobis don't cry. But when his chichiue was looking at him with those eyes― so sad and heartbroken― Shun couldn't stop himself. He could feel a surge of burning aura emanating from him, being drained out of him, but he didn't heed it. It hurt, it hurt, everything hurt so much. The pain in his chest was unbearable, a volcano on the verge of erupting, of leaving a carnage in its wake. He bawled, the tears tunnelling out like a broken dam. It hurt so much, like a million razorblades were lodged in his heart and each pulled and twisted and cut him up to the point where he didn't even know where the pain began. It just hurt everywhere. His otousan was gone. His otousan abandoned them. He left him all alone. His family was broken to shreds and it would never ever be the same. And that hurt. That scorched.
Naruto felt his vision go blurry as his eyes misted because his son, his son was sobbing his broken little heart out. And Naruto's hands trembled as he roughly engulfed his son― sobbing, sobbing, heartbroken son― into his chest in a cumbersome hug. He poured all of his chakra into the boy, a bubble surrounding them, an unbreakable shield against the world. The chakra swiftly suppressed the Nine Tails' chakra. Shun's knees bucked as he balled his chichiue's shirt in his fist and he cried until he felt his heart would explode. Naruto bit his lip and picked the wailing boy into his arms.
Sasuke mutely watched as Naruto took Shun back home with a dull ache in his chest. He clenched and unclenched his fist, feeling like he had been drained of the very last ounce of life within his body. A zombie. He was a zombie. This all felt so surreal, like Sasuke was watching a movie in which the protagonist is a failure of a father and his son just had his heart ripped out of his ribcage by said father. It felt like Sasuke was watching a movie in which he sneered at the pitiful character, a movie about someone else. But as Sasuke slowly, mechanically placed his hand over the ache on the left side of his chest, he knew that the pain was real. The movie was about him.
Shun's sobs had mitigated quite a bit when Naruto gently placed him atop his bed. Shun's head was aching and he couldn't stop hiccoughing. Naruto got into bed and wrapped his arms around the small body in foetal position. He brushed the black strands of hair out of the boy's face as Shun sniffed, too exhausted to wipe away his tears or his snot that had trekked down his face. Shun just blinked, staring at a nondescript spot on the wall, mentally and physically drained. Naruto kissed the boy atop of his dishevelled hair and whispered sweet promises in his ear. Promises him that everything will be alright, that tomorrow would be better, that the pain will pass. Everything will be alright, your chichiue promises. Trust me.
But as Naruto laid in bed embracing his son, faced with all the broken pieces of the boy, he wondered if he could eve mend him back together without leaving scars. Naruto shook his head at the irony of it all. The baby boy he swore to protect from all the heartache, from all the evil in this world, from all the pain― in the end, it was Naruto who dealt him the resounding blow. In the end, it was Naruto who broke his precious boy's heart. In the end, it wasn't the world that caused Shun's agony. It was Naruto. And that is something he could never forgive himself. Silent tears streamed down as he gazed at his beautiful, porcelain-like son, who now slumbered in his arms. The long lashes fanned his creamy pale cheeks, his mouth hung slightly open, the dried tracks of tear visible and Naruto balled his fists. His beautiful slumbering boy who looked so misleadingly peaceful.
Naruto wept quietly, vowing to Shun that he'll make everything alright again, vowing to himself to never break his children's hearts again.
XXX
When Naruto came down to the kitchen for a glass of water, Sasuke didn't even bother looking up.
Naruto's step faltered. Sasuke was crouched over, his head in his hands, elbows on the table, completely motionless. It was the first time Naruto had seen the man so undone.
Naruto felt guilty at the waft of relief that washed over him with the knowledge that the great All-Mighty Uchiha Sasuke wasn't completely immune to hurt.
Sasuke knew that Naruto was watching him, but he didn't care. This wasn't the way things were supposed to pan out. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. Shun wasn't supposed to look at him with such angry eyes. He wasn't supposed to look at him like he was some villain, some intruder who broke his picture-perfect family to pieces. Shun was supposed to love him. Shun was supposed to see, to realize that he was his real father, that he was his flesh and blood. And that was supposed to be enough. He was supposed to instinctively know this and love him. They would train together and he'd raise him to be a first-class ninja― a ninja Fugaku would've been proud to call his grandson. And he would love Shun and he'd finally, finally have a family again.
Then, “Give it time,” was what broke Sasuke out of his stupor.
He lifted his head and looked up at Naruto. For a second, there was such a maelstrom of emotions, so much raw hurt in those dark, dark eyes, Naruto had to clear his throat, afraid he might lose composure again. The sound was all it took for Sasuke to regain his mask of indifference.
“I said give it time, Sasuke. You don't become a parent in a day,” Naruto kindly offered, allowing himself a small smile.
Sasuke couldn't explain it, but suddenly he was seeing red. Angry, he was so angry. Here stood the dead last in his class, the boy he would discard without a second thought who now had blossomed into the Hokage, into the man who was able to soothe their son's aching heart, who calmed Shun down from his meltdown and brought him out of his hysteria, while he, Sasuke could do nothing but dumbly watch from the sidelines. Like a fucking dunce. A spectator to his own life.
“If it weren't for you,” Sasuke began, hissing, “I would've already―”
“Sasuke,” Naruto abruptly cut him, and suddenly it seemed like Naruto had aged considerably in the past twenty-four hours. The lines of fatigue marring his face deepened. “I've just had one of the longest days of my life, I don't want to fight with you,” he sighed, and Sasuke fixated the healing, angry slash on the right side of Naruto's eye where Shun had scratched him.
He filled his glass with water and hesitated by the sink.
“Give it time, okay? You... You're going to make a great dad, trust me.” Naruto smiled at him with so much sincerity, Sasuke's heart stilled. It was strange, but in that moment Sasuke seemed to understand why people called him beautiful.
For the second time that day, Sasuke watched Naruto leave, awestruck, ignoring the strange tugging at his heart. He folded his hands on the table.
No one ever said it would ever be so hard.
See the world with the faintest glow
Break apart and you're dealt the final blow
Your answer's no
And all you hear is,
"it's the end of all time"
To the end of all time
Just so I can see the lightning climb over you
To the end of all time
Just so I can see the lightning climb over me
Over me
Over you
in the movie in my head, this is the song Shun breaks apart to.
Happy back-to-school, Ramadan Kareem (belatedly) & (early) Eid Mubarak, congratulations Djokovic, you are a bamf and you duckies are all wonderful.
Age references:
Sasuke- 30 (was 22 in the first six chapters)
Naruto- 24 (was 16 in the first six chapters)
Shun- 7 (was an embryo in chapter 1, 5 and 6)
Chinatsu- 4 (did not exist in first six chapters)