Will of the Heart - Part 2
Author: emmachase
Requested by: Everyone who took part in my poll
Title: Will of the Heart - Part 2
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, some fluff
Pairing: Yuto X HSJ
Summary: Remember that little poll I had a while ago? Well, I finally got around to making a quick story about it! I hope you like it
Notes: Stay tuned for the next chapter folks!
Part one may be found...
>>Here!<<
Morning came and Yuto promised he would be less forgetful before leaving a still frowning Daiki in the morning.
“Let’s just hope I have the rest of my life to “not be forgetful” in…” Yuto whispered to himself as he walked out to the first stop on his schedule.
---Keito---
“Keito!” Yuto called as he saw the familiar figure standing in the park.
“Yo! Yuto!” Keito waved back as Yuto ran towards him, landing playfully on the blanket that the older boy had set on the ground.
“Is there… some reason why you wanted to have a picnic breakfast all of a sudden?” Keito asked as he handed Yuto a piece of toast.
“Nope…. I just thought… we’ve always wanted to do it, and now we finally have the time.”
Yuto hoped that this would satisfy Keito, he didn't really want to relive his constant “spend time with you” excuses. Over time, he wasn’t even sure he believed himself anymore.
“Yuto…. You’re looking kinda pale…. Are you sure theres nothing going on?”
“Mmm… nothing that I can do anything about…”
“But… there’s something….?”
“Keito… do you remember…. When I asked if...”
“-if I loved you?”
Yuto blushed as he remembered the stupid way he blurted out the question.
“Yes…”
“Yuto… we all love you… you’re one of us…..whether you want to be or not….” Keito giggled as he gave the younger boy a little nudge.
“Yeah… I know…”
“But if you need to know Yuto… I do love you….. “
“T-Thanks…”
The air was silent now, except for a small breeze that wafted past the two boys as they laid there in stillness. Though they never spoke a word, they each knew what the other was thinking, and Yuto laid down on the soft blanket. He closed his eyes for a moment, before opening them again and staring at Keito. The older boy had his own eyes closed as he leaned against the nearby tree. Although it seemed as if Keito was sleeping, Yuto could hear the soft humming, and hearing it, he felt so at peace. He had the need, the urge the want to be with him, to hug Keito and never let go, he felt devotion, and he felt love and so many other things he had never even known existed. And all at the same time, he felt so confused still. He couldn't bring himself to just open his heart to anyone, even if Keito had just done the same.
“Keito?”
“Hm?”
“I like… being here with you….”
“I like…. Being here with you too…” Keito smiled that peaceful smile and Yuto trembled as he grasped tightly at the grass in his fist.
The picnic ended soon after, as the air grew cooler, and Keito packed up the things he had brought and waved a happy goodbye to Yuto as the younger boy sighed and turned away, ashamed to look at the boy who had said he loved him.
-----Ryosuke-----
“Yuuuu-Chaaaaaan!” Ryosuke hopped up happily as Yuto approached the studio. He had been so happy when Yuto agreed to come to the set for Hidarime Tantei.
“Ne ne! You’ve come on such a good day!”
“Oh?” Yuto asked, brushing aside his hair casually.
“Ohh Yamada-kun, is this Nakajima-kun? He talks about you a lot.”
“Oh! Ishihara-san! Y-Yeah this is him.” Ryosuke tried to nod nonchalantly, but everyone knew he was a bit nervous. Though for the moment, Yuto didn't know why.
“Yamada-Kun! We’re ready for you!” A man’s voice came from the studio’s lot in the back, and Ryosuke perked up.
“I’ve got to go get punched in the eye, and then just film a few scenes, then I can show you around okay?” He asked, already turning to walk as Yuto nodded.
“You’re lucky Yuto-kun, you’ve got THE Yamada Ryosuke pining after you….”
Yuto froze as he heard the words.
“Oops! Was I not supposed to say anything?! Ne ne! Don't say anything okay? Yamada-kun would kill me….”
Yuto nodded, still speechless. What was there to say?
He sat quietly in the corner watching as Ryosuke ran about the small lined parking lot after his “brother” and he winced as he saw the, although fake, impact of his head against the ground. Lastly, he watched as the other boy posed, for the cameras, but no one knew that what Ryosuke was really looking at was Yuto…
“You’re very radiant today Yamada-kun!” The cameraman applauded
“Oh t-thanks!” Yuto followed Ryosuke with his eyes and he chuckled a bit as he watched the “Super-Idol” stumble a few lines and even at one point flat out fall on his face.
“Ne.. Yuto?”
“H-hm?”
“Would…. You like to go for a walk?”
“Sure.”
Due to his responsibilities, the “walk” actually ended up being a short walk around the filming compound, but somehow the two boys managed to find a small secluded corner of the lot and sat down.
“Yama-chan, you’ve known me for a long time right?”
“Un, since our junior days ne?”
“Um… if… one day… I wasn't here, what… do you think would happen?”
“Are you going away somewhere?”
“Er.. yeah… b-but lets say… I could stay here if someone would… let me live with them…”
“Oh?”
“B-but it has to be someone who really likes me deshou? Otherwise it wouldn't work ne?” Yuto tacked on words hastily to cover his nervousness.
“Yuu-chan… you should come stay with me! I mean. My house is a little messy I admit, but I’d love to have you over! I love spending time with you! Would…. You be okay if you stayed with me? I mean. I’d love to have you… you know…”
Before Yuto could say anything else, the shorter boy hugged him and he sighed.
“Come over anytime!” Ryosuke beamed as Yuto sighed. This was not getting any easier. Now Yuto had found someone who wanted to spend time with him, who wanted to be with him, someone who could tolerate his antics, and understand him. Wasn't that love?
“Oii Yamada-Kun! It’s time for the next scene!” Someone called from beyond the walls and the two boys stood up.
“Go, it’s okay, I’m going to go see Chinen…”
“But…. you’ll come by later?” Ryosuke asked as he hopped anxiously on one foot.
“Yeah….” Yuto nodded solemnly and he was surprised when his friend nodded excitedly and gave him a quick hug before running full speed in the direction of the voice.
“If I have a “later”….” Yuto sighed again as he trudged off the lot, heading in the direction of Chinen’s gym.
-----Chinen-----
“Yuuuuto” Chinen jumped happily off the balance beam and ran towards his friend, tackling him and making what sounded like a “kya~” sound. As expected from one of JUMP’s cutest members.
“Ne ne ne, Whatcha doin here?” Chinen asked, as he poked Yuto’s cheeks
“Well… I came… to see you and your awesome acrobatics… you know, maybe get some pointers? The balance beam thing.. that’s really cool… “
“Really? Well I just started, so…. I still have a long way to go ne?” Chinen blushed adorably.
Yuto watched as the lithe boy commanded such grace, the feet that were so used to dashing back and forth for choreography seemed so delicate now, as he watched Chinen backflip along the narrow beam. A few tricks, and even a minor slip later, the younger boy hopped off the beam and ran over to Yuto, pulling him over.
“Ne-ne come on Yuto!” The boy tugged and Yuto was obliged to follow. Room after room they went, eventually ending up at a padded room, well lit and from the looks of it, made for falling into.
“This room is made for all the stage acrobatics that I do.. hehe.” Chinen smiled and tugged him even further into the room.
The next hour was spent with Yuto falling flat on his back while attempting to do flips, cartwheels, and the occasional handspring.
“Ow….” Yuto winced as he rubbed his back.
“Yuu-Chan are you okay?” Chinen asked, frowning.
“I’m… fine…”
“But… are you sure? I’m sorry if I did anything….. or if I made you do anything..”
“I’m fine…. And you didn't make me do anything, I just…… wanted to try something new.” Yuto shrugged, seeing the gleaming puppy dog eyes about to appear in the younger boy’s eyes.
“I’m sorry…still…” Chinen said as he wrapped an arm around Yuto and pressed against his chest.
“Chii…. It’s okay… really…”
“I-Its just, I’m really happy you came to the gym today, it’s been such a bad day, I couldn't land any of my flips, couldn't do any of my tricks… “
“But… you were doing fine just a minute ago…”
“Yeah… when you got here…. I felt better…..” Chinen smiled brightly as Yuto felt his mouth freeze.
“I mean… you’re always such a bright person…. Maybe seeing you…. You know…. Make me feel better… made me happier….maybe….. you made my day… grow brighter….” Chinen blushed
“Yuri-kun! It’s time to resume your practice!” A stern voice called from the doorway, and Yuto turned to see Chinen’s coach standing with hands on hips, and a rather annoyed glare in his eyes.
“Oops….. gotta go Yuu-chan,I think I made Ogata-san angry….” Chinen ran to the door and Yuto sat still on the padded floor.
“Someone…. Who is so happy to see me… someone who’s day grows “brighter” when I’m here….” Yuto repeated to himself as he slowly picked himself up. As he did a sudden pain hit his chest and he winced.
“Ow…. Falling too many times…” He shook his head and limped off, his muscles too sore to really support him.
-----Ryutaro-----
“Ryutaro?” Yuto called into the house as he entered with the younger Morimoto brother staring at him.
“Nii-Chan’s upstairs in his room..” Shintaro reported as he shut the door and ran off to what Yuto assumed to be the TV he heard in the other room.
“Ryutaro!?” Yuto called again as he walked up the stairs to find the door to Ryutaro’s room wide open and the youngest member of JUMP fast asleep on the bed within.
“jeez…. Ryu-Chan….it’s almost dinner time… do you really sleep this early?” Yuto giggled to himself as he walked to the small chair beside Ryutaro’s bed.
He gently pulled on the chair before plopping down and reading one of Ryutaro’s mangas, making sure to remember the page Ryutaro was on before continuing his own read.
“Yuuto…”
“E-Eh?” Yuto put down the book to see Ryutaro’s eyes still closed.
“Sleep… talking?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Ooo Nii-Chan is such a baby… he’s going to be soo embarrassed” Yuto looked up to see Shintaro giggling from the doorway.
“Shin…chan?”
Before anymore words could be exchanged, Yuto watched as the younger Morimoto brother threw a small red ball at the sleeping lump and quickly dashed away.
“mmhn Ow….” Ryutaro winced as he slowly stirred and sat up. He was disoriented for a few moments, rubbing his eyes and yawning broadly. Yuto couldn't help but look on as for the first time, Ryutaro acted his age. The youngest in JUMP, always seemed the oldest, but now… he held in a chuckled as Ryutaro let out a small whine and tried to open his eyes.
“Good afternoon Ryu-Chan.” Yuto said, finally.
“A-Ah! Y-Yuto!” Ryutaro’s eyes flared open and he was suddenly wide awake.
“I didn't want to bother you….so…. I read some of your manga…. Is.. that okay?”
“H-Hai…”
“Shin-Chan said something about you being embarrassed? Did… something happen?” Yuto asked worriedly.
“N-No…” Ryutaro replied, secretly cursing his brother in his mind.
“Are you sure?”
“u-un.” Yuto watched as Ryutaro climbed off the bed and in an instant crumpled to the floor.
“Ryutaro!” Yuto ran to the boy’s side and looked at the ankle that had been so carefully bandaged.
“Ryutaro, what happened?”
“I-It’s nothing…”
“It’s not nothing… you did something to your ankle…”
“Its just a little sprain… it’s always a little sore when I don't move it for a while…. Like after sleeping… b-but I’ll be fine.” Ryutaro said as he tried to get up and Yuto’s hand stopped him.
“Ryutaro…if you’re hurt… you shouldn’t hesitate to tell me…”
“I… just didn't want to add anymore to what you’re already facing…”
“W-What do you mean?”
“Well… I…. heard that you’ve been very… stressed looking these last days…and so…”
“But you never had a problem coming to me before ne? Even when we were both Jrs, you could always come to me, you know I’d listen ne? So why didn't you tell me this time?” Yuto asked as he slipped his hands under Ryutaro’s body and gently lifted him off the floor and onto the bed again.
“B-Because…” The younger boy’s voice trailed off into silence.
“Because?” Yuto continued to press the subject as he checked the bandages for their tightness. If they were too loose, Ryutaro’s ankle wouldn't set right for healing.
“Because…”
Yuto sighed as he placed his hands on Ryutaro’s shoulders
“Ryu-Chan, why didn't you just tell me?”
“Because Yuto’s always taking care of me…. I feel like…. A baby around you… and I want to show you that I’m strong enough to handle things myself. So you don't always have to watch over me.” Ryutaro said quickly, not even taking a breath. With those words, Yuto’s hands stopped and he stood up again with a sigh before gently laying his hand upon Ryutaro’s.
“Ryu-Chan… you know… that I love looking out for you. It… kinda gives me a feeling of having a little brother. With us being out on the road so many days at a time, I miss Raiya, but when I see you… its kinda like I have a kid brother with me. I love it when you depend on me, because… it feels like I have some self-worth you know?” Yuto’s heart seemed to have bypassed his mind altogether as his words seemed to flow out of him uncontrollably.
“S-Sorry…” Ryutaro looked away, hearing things like that made him feel… so foolish now…
“Ryu-Chan… is there… anything else?” Yuto asked as he sat down on the bed now, leaning back and resting his head on the headboard. In a few moments, he felt Ryutaro snaking his wake above his arm and the little boy’s head resting against his side.
“Nope… I just… I’ll depend on you still…. I promise.” Ryutaro smiled as he closed his eyes again and Yuto felt a pair of arms wrap around him.
The rest of the afternoon came and went and soon night came upon them. Yuto spent the day walking Ryutaro up and down the Morimoto household, getting him food, making sure he was comfortable… but as dinner time came… he excused himself and left Ryutaro in his parent’s care.
Quietly he walked out of the house and strolled his way back through town, to his house. Ryutaro…. Depended on him, someone who actually relied on him being there… the trust behind saying something like that… isn’t that…love?
“It’s not fair… it’s not fair…” Yuto broke into tears as he could feel his time slipping away in the very audible ticks of his mental clock. It wasn't fair that this decision was forced upon him, and it wasn't fair that he had to choose, and it wasn't fair…
“It’s not fair… that I have to die…” Yuto sobbed as he slumped down against the gate of his house.
Alone sitting outside, Yuto cried as the images of his friends flashed through his head, the times they spent, and those smiles that he may never see again. Time was running out, and he hadn’t chosen one, and even they he didn't know which one his heart belonged to. The skies darkened quickly as the approaching clouds gathered and twisted. And it seemed that all the world weeped with the confused boy, and with a final cry the heavens broke loose and cried with him.
“I… I don't want to die… I don't want to die!” Yuto shouted at the sky, which replied only by drowning him with its torrential rains.
“Yuto?”
“Yuto! Are you okay!?”
In the distance, cloaked by the all consuming darkness of a moonless night, stood Daiki and Keito, each walking their way towards him and huddling under a large umbrella.
“I… I don't want to die…” Yuto said weakly as he felt the same stabbing pain in his heart.
“I don't.. want to die…” He repeated as his two friends gathered around him and knelt down on the wet ground.
“Yuto!?”
“I don't want to die…. I don't want to die…”
“Yuto… what are you talking about, you’re not going to die, you’re not going to die for a long long time.” Keito said, trying to comfort him.
“I’m…. I’m going to die… I'm going to die…. And its all because … because I cant choose… I cant… and I’m going to die….” Yuto sobbed hysterically as he pushed Keito away and knocked into Daiki as he ran into the blinding rain. He didn't want them to see him, not like this. He wanted their last memory of him to be a collected one, a happy person, even if he was miserable now, that was the image he wanted to leave behind.
“Yuto! Come back! I-I… I brought the things you left at my house!” Daiki called as he chased after him.
“Yuto…. Yuto! Where are you!? I brought some things to cheer you up!” Keito called
No matter how much the two yelled, Yuto could only huddle into the corner of the small alleyway he had taken shelter in. Not from the rain, that still poured upon him, but from his friends.
“I… don't want to die…” Yuto repeated as the stabbing pain in his chest grew stronger and he felt as his heart were being squeezed and torn to shreads.
“I.. I… I d-Don't…” Yuto gasped as breathing became difficult for him, and a small alarm on his phone rang, signaling it was now 10 at night. He had two hours of life left….
“Yuto!” Keito and Daiki appeared before him, attracted by the sounds of the ringing alarm that the still sobbing boy was now too weak to turn off.
“Yuto!? A-Are you okay!?” Keito knelt down again as he pressed his ear against Yuto’s chest.
“D-Dai-chan get an ambulance, now! His heart rate is way way down! Something’s wrong! Hold on okay Yuto!?” Keito panicked, his voice grew louder.
“I.. I don't want… to…” Yuto gasped,
“You’re not going to die! You’re not going to die for a long time!” Keito shouted as his hands trembled from the cold rain and the sheer fear that racked his body.
“I don't… want to.. d-die…” Yuto finished as he gently brushed Keito’s rain-slicked cheek before he felt his eyes give in to exhaustion and his body loosen.
“Yuto!” He heard his friends calling, but had no will to reply now…..
-----Everyone-----
“Your friend has a hidden heart defect, incredibly difficult to notice, it wasn't until we ran several tests that we discovered it, its progressed beyond the point of treatment… we’ve stabilized him for now… but that is a temporary measure… I think… you’d better say you goodbyes…” Yuto heard a man’s voice, and shortly after the voices of nine boys who had been crying just moments before.
Slowly he opened his eyes to see the pure white room that he was laying in, gently he took in his situation. The feeling of the needles in his arm keeping him alive, with the drugs he was sure wouldn't sustain him much longer.
“Yuto?!” Yabu asked eagerly as the rest of the boys surrounded the bed.
“I… I don't want… to die…” Yuto said quietly as the nine other faces around him looked at each other, unable to say anything.
“I don't want to… I want to live… I want to live… please…” Yuto pleaded to an invisible entity and he sat up as his weakened body protested.
“Yuto! You should lay down!”
“I don't want any of it! I don't want this! I just….. I just want… unhh!” Yuto screamed as he ripped out the IV needles in his arm and he winced as he felt himself hit the ground of the hospital floor. Immediately, hands flew out to help him stand up, but as they tried to push him back onto the bed, he shoved forward.
“I don't want to die!” He shouted as he felt the tears in his eyes again.
He ran and ran as he felt the last of his waning strength leaving him still more quickly than before. The dark outline of the street outside came closer as he came to the front of the hospital and he burst out the door as his legs gave way and he collapsed on the pavement in front. In the dead of the night, there was no one to see him die now, there was no one to comfort him, and no one for him to choose from.
“N-Nii-Chan?” Yuto turned to see his brother standing with his mother and father, they had both clearly been crying on the drive to the hospital, and Raiya remained unaware still, but those innocent eyes always picked up on things, even if he were not told.
“Rai..ya..” Yuto panted as he felt his heart stab suddenly and stop and he drew his last breath. The last thing his tired body felt, was the cold cement beneath him. The hands of his friends, his family helping him back up, was a warmth he never felt… and never would again...
---
“Welcome back… Yuto-kun…” Yuto blinked as he saw the familiar place and the familiar face of Rael, the Angel of Love.
“I… I didn't …. I couldn't…” Yuto shook his head and Rael nodded.
“Normally… if you had… the angels of fate, would have weaved your thread in tandem with the one you’ve chosen, and your lives would become inextricably bound to each others. But now… with no one to string it along,… “ Rael turned to look at Yuto and he gently laid a comforting hand on Yuto’s shoulder.
Yuto!
“H-Huh?” Yuto turned around as he heard the cries of his friends and Rael turned to look at him again,
The voices began to get louder still,
“Rael!” Rael!” A lesser angel flew in and Yuto turned to see the two whispering urgently and without a word Rael followed and Yuto ran after the two.
“This has never happened before…” Yuto heard the lesser angel say as they entered the giant room that housed the many threads of all the people in the world. He felt himself be drawn to his own thread, but where it once rested, he found a bundle instead. He gasped as the familiar glows of the strings became familiar to him, and he watched as 12 strings twisted their way around his and the pale whiteness of his own thread began to curl and weave itself in between the patterns the other strings left. Still growing he felt himself become more and more corporeal as his thread curved along the glowing strings and into the giant mass of strings that created the world of lines. Where his thread had ended and where it had picked up he didn't know anymore, the solid knot formed by the other 12 threads, the threads of his loved ones, his friends completely covered it up.
“Well done… Yuto-kun…” Rael’s voice grew more and more distant as Yuto felt himself yanked back down to earth and his body beckoned for him to return.
“What’s going on?” The angel asked.
“Love… is taking its course… the only thing more powerful than fate…. Love…. Can change…..”
Yuto felt the tugging grow stronger and he felt his entire being being pulled through the clouds.
“Love can change… anything.” The last word rippled in the air as he felt himself be pulled into his body again and his soul joined with his body and became corporeal again.
“Yuto!” He heard the boys around him cry as his ears became shrill again from the sobs and his eyes fluttered as they tried to take in everything again.
“He He’s alive! His eyes! His eyes!” Chinen jumped as the other boys took a moment to compose themselves before looking.
“Yuto.. you’re alive! You’re alive! Thank god…” Keito sighed in relief as he wiped away still flowing tears from his eyes.
“Don't scare us like that!” Ryutaro said, doing the same.
“Thank goodness you’re still here.. we were so…” Ryosuke said, putting on a brave face.
“I know… but… its… thanks to you…all of you… that I’m still here….”
Yuto’s body felt weak, but as he spoke he could still imagine his pale thread growing stronger and for a brief second, he could see Rael smiling and nodding. The stabbing pain in his chest lessened.
“I wasn't saved by god…. I was saved, by your kindness.. by your…”
“save your breath, didn't you just escape death?” Hikaru said, wiping away his tears with a goofy smile.
“Just rest Yuto… just rest…”Daiki said quietly pulling the blanket around him.
“I was saved… by the will of your hearts… I was saved by… your love.”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Uwa! I hope you like this... T_T It's been an idea of mine for quite a while... I don't know how you all took the ending… but just remember, cruel comments are a type of feedback too…. I cant get better if I don't know what I’m doing wrong! This is the first type of this story i've tried.....
Please let me know what you think! Comments are <3
~Emmie
Requested by: Everyone who took part in my poll
Title: Will of the Heart - Part 2
Rating: PG
Genre: Romance, some fluff
Pairing: Yuto X HSJ
Summary: Remember that little poll I had a while ago? Well, I finally got around to making a quick story about it! I hope you like it
Notes: Stay tuned for the next chapter folks!
Part one may be found...
>>Here!<<
Morning came and Yuto promised he would be less forgetful before leaving a still frowning Daiki in the morning.
“Let’s just hope I have the rest of my life to “not be forgetful” in…” Yuto whispered to himself as he walked out to the first stop on his schedule.
---Keito---
“Keito!” Yuto called as he saw the familiar figure standing in the park.
“Yo! Yuto!” Keito waved back as Yuto ran towards him, landing playfully on the blanket that the older boy had set on the ground.
“Is there… some reason why you wanted to have a picnic breakfast all of a sudden?” Keito asked as he handed Yuto a piece of toast.
“Nope…. I just thought… we’ve always wanted to do it, and now we finally have the time.”
Yuto hoped that this would satisfy Keito, he didn't really want to relive his constant “spend time with you” excuses. Over time, he wasn’t even sure he believed himself anymore.
“Yuto…. You’re looking kinda pale…. Are you sure theres nothing going on?”
“Mmm… nothing that I can do anything about…”
“But… there’s something….?”
“Keito… do you remember…. When I asked if...”
“-if I loved you?”
Yuto blushed as he remembered the stupid way he blurted out the question.
“Yes…”
“Yuto… we all love you… you’re one of us…..whether you want to be or not….” Keito giggled as he gave the younger boy a little nudge.
“Yeah… I know…”
“But if you need to know Yuto… I do love you….. “
“T-Thanks…”
The air was silent now, except for a small breeze that wafted past the two boys as they laid there in stillness. Though they never spoke a word, they each knew what the other was thinking, and Yuto laid down on the soft blanket. He closed his eyes for a moment, before opening them again and staring at Keito. The older boy had his own eyes closed as he leaned against the nearby tree. Although it seemed as if Keito was sleeping, Yuto could hear the soft humming, and hearing it, he felt so at peace. He had the need, the urge the want to be with him, to hug Keito and never let go, he felt devotion, and he felt love and so many other things he had never even known existed. And all at the same time, he felt so confused still. He couldn't bring himself to just open his heart to anyone, even if Keito had just done the same.
“Keito?”
“Hm?”
“I like… being here with you….”
“I like…. Being here with you too…” Keito smiled that peaceful smile and Yuto trembled as he grasped tightly at the grass in his fist.
The picnic ended soon after, as the air grew cooler, and Keito packed up the things he had brought and waved a happy goodbye to Yuto as the younger boy sighed and turned away, ashamed to look at the boy who had said he loved him.
-----Ryosuke-----
“Yuuuu-Chaaaaaan!” Ryosuke hopped up happily as Yuto approached the studio. He had been so happy when Yuto agreed to come to the set for Hidarime Tantei.
“Ne ne! You’ve come on such a good day!”
“Oh?” Yuto asked, brushing aside his hair casually.
“Ohh Yamada-kun, is this Nakajima-kun? He talks about you a lot.”
“Oh! Ishihara-san! Y-Yeah this is him.” Ryosuke tried to nod nonchalantly, but everyone knew he was a bit nervous. Though for the moment, Yuto didn't know why.
“Yamada-Kun! We’re ready for you!” A man’s voice came from the studio’s lot in the back, and Ryosuke perked up.
“I’ve got to go get punched in the eye, and then just film a few scenes, then I can show you around okay?” He asked, already turning to walk as Yuto nodded.
“You’re lucky Yuto-kun, you’ve got THE Yamada Ryosuke pining after you….”
Yuto froze as he heard the words.
“Oops! Was I not supposed to say anything?! Ne ne! Don't say anything okay? Yamada-kun would kill me….”
Yuto nodded, still speechless. What was there to say?
He sat quietly in the corner watching as Ryosuke ran about the small lined parking lot after his “brother” and he winced as he saw the, although fake, impact of his head against the ground. Lastly, he watched as the other boy posed, for the cameras, but no one knew that what Ryosuke was really looking at was Yuto…
“You’re very radiant today Yamada-kun!” The cameraman applauded
“Oh t-thanks!” Yuto followed Ryosuke with his eyes and he chuckled a bit as he watched the “Super-Idol” stumble a few lines and even at one point flat out fall on his face.
“Ne.. Yuto?”
“H-hm?”
“Would…. You like to go for a walk?”
“Sure.”
Due to his responsibilities, the “walk” actually ended up being a short walk around the filming compound, but somehow the two boys managed to find a small secluded corner of the lot and sat down.
“Yama-chan, you’ve known me for a long time right?”
“Un, since our junior days ne?”
“Um… if… one day… I wasn't here, what… do you think would happen?”
“Are you going away somewhere?”
“Er.. yeah… b-but lets say… I could stay here if someone would… let me live with them…”
“Oh?”
“B-but it has to be someone who really likes me deshou? Otherwise it wouldn't work ne?” Yuto tacked on words hastily to cover his nervousness.
“Yuu-chan… you should come stay with me! I mean. My house is a little messy I admit, but I’d love to have you over! I love spending time with you! Would…. You be okay if you stayed with me? I mean. I’d love to have you… you know…”
Before Yuto could say anything else, the shorter boy hugged him and he sighed.
“Come over anytime!” Ryosuke beamed as Yuto sighed. This was not getting any easier. Now Yuto had found someone who wanted to spend time with him, who wanted to be with him, someone who could tolerate his antics, and understand him. Wasn't that love?
“Oii Yamada-Kun! It’s time for the next scene!” Someone called from beyond the walls and the two boys stood up.
“Go, it’s okay, I’m going to go see Chinen…”
“But…. you’ll come by later?” Ryosuke asked as he hopped anxiously on one foot.
“Yeah….” Yuto nodded solemnly and he was surprised when his friend nodded excitedly and gave him a quick hug before running full speed in the direction of the voice.
“If I have a “later”….” Yuto sighed again as he trudged off the lot, heading in the direction of Chinen’s gym.
-----Chinen-----
“Yuuuuto” Chinen jumped happily off the balance beam and ran towards his friend, tackling him and making what sounded like a “kya~” sound. As expected from one of JUMP’s cutest members.
“Ne ne ne, Whatcha doin here?” Chinen asked, as he poked Yuto’s cheeks
“Well… I came… to see you and your awesome acrobatics… you know, maybe get some pointers? The balance beam thing.. that’s really cool… “
“Really? Well I just started, so…. I still have a long way to go ne?” Chinen blushed adorably.
Yuto watched as the lithe boy commanded such grace, the feet that were so used to dashing back and forth for choreography seemed so delicate now, as he watched Chinen backflip along the narrow beam. A few tricks, and even a minor slip later, the younger boy hopped off the beam and ran over to Yuto, pulling him over.
“Ne-ne come on Yuto!” The boy tugged and Yuto was obliged to follow. Room after room they went, eventually ending up at a padded room, well lit and from the looks of it, made for falling into.
“This room is made for all the stage acrobatics that I do.. hehe.” Chinen smiled and tugged him even further into the room.
The next hour was spent with Yuto falling flat on his back while attempting to do flips, cartwheels, and the occasional handspring.
“Ow….” Yuto winced as he rubbed his back.
“Yuu-Chan are you okay?” Chinen asked, frowning.
“I’m… fine…”
“But… are you sure? I’m sorry if I did anything….. or if I made you do anything..”
“I’m fine…. And you didn't make me do anything, I just…… wanted to try something new.” Yuto shrugged, seeing the gleaming puppy dog eyes about to appear in the younger boy’s eyes.
“I’m sorry…still…” Chinen said as he wrapped an arm around Yuto and pressed against his chest.
“Chii…. It’s okay… really…”
“I-Its just, I’m really happy you came to the gym today, it’s been such a bad day, I couldn't land any of my flips, couldn't do any of my tricks… “
“But… you were doing fine just a minute ago…”
“Yeah… when you got here…. I felt better…..” Chinen smiled brightly as Yuto felt his mouth freeze.
“I mean… you’re always such a bright person…. Maybe seeing you…. You know…. Make me feel better… made me happier….maybe….. you made my day… grow brighter….” Chinen blushed
“Yuri-kun! It’s time to resume your practice!” A stern voice called from the doorway, and Yuto turned to see Chinen’s coach standing with hands on hips, and a rather annoyed glare in his eyes.
“Oops….. gotta go Yuu-chan,I think I made Ogata-san angry….” Chinen ran to the door and Yuto sat still on the padded floor.
“Someone…. Who is so happy to see me… someone who’s day grows “brighter” when I’m here….” Yuto repeated to himself as he slowly picked himself up. As he did a sudden pain hit his chest and he winced.
“Ow…. Falling too many times…” He shook his head and limped off, his muscles too sore to really support him.
-----Ryutaro-----
“Ryutaro?” Yuto called into the house as he entered with the younger Morimoto brother staring at him.
“Nii-Chan’s upstairs in his room..” Shintaro reported as he shut the door and ran off to what Yuto assumed to be the TV he heard in the other room.
“Ryutaro!?” Yuto called again as he walked up the stairs to find the door to Ryutaro’s room wide open and the youngest member of JUMP fast asleep on the bed within.
“jeez…. Ryu-Chan….it’s almost dinner time… do you really sleep this early?” Yuto giggled to himself as he walked to the small chair beside Ryutaro’s bed.
He gently pulled on the chair before plopping down and reading one of Ryutaro’s mangas, making sure to remember the page Ryutaro was on before continuing his own read.
“Yuuto…”
“E-Eh?” Yuto put down the book to see Ryutaro’s eyes still closed.
“Sleep… talking?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Ooo Nii-Chan is such a baby… he’s going to be soo embarrassed” Yuto looked up to see Shintaro giggling from the doorway.
“Shin…chan?”
Before anymore words could be exchanged, Yuto watched as the younger Morimoto brother threw a small red ball at the sleeping lump and quickly dashed away.
“mmhn Ow….” Ryutaro winced as he slowly stirred and sat up. He was disoriented for a few moments, rubbing his eyes and yawning broadly. Yuto couldn't help but look on as for the first time, Ryutaro acted his age. The youngest in JUMP, always seemed the oldest, but now… he held in a chuckled as Ryutaro let out a small whine and tried to open his eyes.
“Good afternoon Ryu-Chan.” Yuto said, finally.
“A-Ah! Y-Yuto!” Ryutaro’s eyes flared open and he was suddenly wide awake.
“I didn't want to bother you….so…. I read some of your manga…. Is.. that okay?”
“H-Hai…”
“Shin-Chan said something about you being embarrassed? Did… something happen?” Yuto asked worriedly.
“N-No…” Ryutaro replied, secretly cursing his brother in his mind.
“Are you sure?”
“u-un.” Yuto watched as Ryutaro climbed off the bed and in an instant crumpled to the floor.
“Ryutaro!” Yuto ran to the boy’s side and looked at the ankle that had been so carefully bandaged.
“Ryutaro, what happened?”
“I-It’s nothing…”
“It’s not nothing… you did something to your ankle…”
“Its just a little sprain… it’s always a little sore when I don't move it for a while…. Like after sleeping… b-but I’ll be fine.” Ryutaro said as he tried to get up and Yuto’s hand stopped him.
“Ryutaro…if you’re hurt… you shouldn’t hesitate to tell me…”
“I… just didn't want to add anymore to what you’re already facing…”
“W-What do you mean?”
“Well… I…. heard that you’ve been very… stressed looking these last days…and so…”
“But you never had a problem coming to me before ne? Even when we were both Jrs, you could always come to me, you know I’d listen ne? So why didn't you tell me this time?” Yuto asked as he slipped his hands under Ryutaro’s body and gently lifted him off the floor and onto the bed again.
“B-Because…” The younger boy’s voice trailed off into silence.
“Because?” Yuto continued to press the subject as he checked the bandages for their tightness. If they were too loose, Ryutaro’s ankle wouldn't set right for healing.
“Because…”
Yuto sighed as he placed his hands on Ryutaro’s shoulders
“Ryu-Chan, why didn't you just tell me?”
“Because Yuto’s always taking care of me…. I feel like…. A baby around you… and I want to show you that I’m strong enough to handle things myself. So you don't always have to watch over me.” Ryutaro said quickly, not even taking a breath. With those words, Yuto’s hands stopped and he stood up again with a sigh before gently laying his hand upon Ryutaro’s.
“Ryu-Chan… you know… that I love looking out for you. It… kinda gives me a feeling of having a little brother. With us being out on the road so many days at a time, I miss Raiya, but when I see you… its kinda like I have a kid brother with me. I love it when you depend on me, because… it feels like I have some self-worth you know?” Yuto’s heart seemed to have bypassed his mind altogether as his words seemed to flow out of him uncontrollably.
“S-Sorry…” Ryutaro looked away, hearing things like that made him feel… so foolish now…
“Ryu-Chan… is there… anything else?” Yuto asked as he sat down on the bed now, leaning back and resting his head on the headboard. In a few moments, he felt Ryutaro snaking his wake above his arm and the little boy’s head resting against his side.
“Nope… I just… I’ll depend on you still…. I promise.” Ryutaro smiled as he closed his eyes again and Yuto felt a pair of arms wrap around him.
The rest of the afternoon came and went and soon night came upon them. Yuto spent the day walking Ryutaro up and down the Morimoto household, getting him food, making sure he was comfortable… but as dinner time came… he excused himself and left Ryutaro in his parent’s care.
Quietly he walked out of the house and strolled his way back through town, to his house. Ryutaro…. Depended on him, someone who actually relied on him being there… the trust behind saying something like that… isn’t that…love?
“It’s not fair… it’s not fair…” Yuto broke into tears as he could feel his time slipping away in the very audible ticks of his mental clock. It wasn't fair that this decision was forced upon him, and it wasn't fair that he had to choose, and it wasn't fair…
“It’s not fair… that I have to die…” Yuto sobbed as he slumped down against the gate of his house.
Alone sitting outside, Yuto cried as the images of his friends flashed through his head, the times they spent, and those smiles that he may never see again. Time was running out, and he hadn’t chosen one, and even they he didn't know which one his heart belonged to. The skies darkened quickly as the approaching clouds gathered and twisted. And it seemed that all the world weeped with the confused boy, and with a final cry the heavens broke loose and cried with him.
“I… I don't want to die… I don't want to die!” Yuto shouted at the sky, which replied only by drowning him with its torrential rains.
“Yuto?”
“Yuto! Are you okay!?”
In the distance, cloaked by the all consuming darkness of a moonless night, stood Daiki and Keito, each walking their way towards him and huddling under a large umbrella.
“I… I don't want to die…” Yuto said weakly as he felt the same stabbing pain in his heart.
“I don't.. want to die…” He repeated as his two friends gathered around him and knelt down on the wet ground.
“Yuto!?”
“I don't want to die…. I don't want to die…”
“Yuto… what are you talking about, you’re not going to die, you’re not going to die for a long long time.” Keito said, trying to comfort him.
“I’m…. I’m going to die… I'm going to die…. And its all because … because I cant choose… I cant… and I’m going to die….” Yuto sobbed hysterically as he pushed Keito away and knocked into Daiki as he ran into the blinding rain. He didn't want them to see him, not like this. He wanted their last memory of him to be a collected one, a happy person, even if he was miserable now, that was the image he wanted to leave behind.
“Yuto! Come back! I-I… I brought the things you left at my house!” Daiki called as he chased after him.
“Yuto…. Yuto! Where are you!? I brought some things to cheer you up!” Keito called
No matter how much the two yelled, Yuto could only huddle into the corner of the small alleyway he had taken shelter in. Not from the rain, that still poured upon him, but from his friends.
“I… don't want to die…” Yuto repeated as the stabbing pain in his chest grew stronger and he felt as his heart were being squeezed and torn to shreads.
“I.. I… I d-Don't…” Yuto gasped as breathing became difficult for him, and a small alarm on his phone rang, signaling it was now 10 at night. He had two hours of life left….
“Yuto!” Keito and Daiki appeared before him, attracted by the sounds of the ringing alarm that the still sobbing boy was now too weak to turn off.
“Yuto!? A-Are you okay!?” Keito knelt down again as he pressed his ear against Yuto’s chest.
“D-Dai-chan get an ambulance, now! His heart rate is way way down! Something’s wrong! Hold on okay Yuto!?” Keito panicked, his voice grew louder.
“I.. I don't want… to…” Yuto gasped,
“You’re not going to die! You’re not going to die for a long time!” Keito shouted as his hands trembled from the cold rain and the sheer fear that racked his body.
“I don't… want to.. d-die…” Yuto finished as he gently brushed Keito’s rain-slicked cheek before he felt his eyes give in to exhaustion and his body loosen.
“Yuto!” He heard his friends calling, but had no will to reply now…..
-----Everyone-----
“Your friend has a hidden heart defect, incredibly difficult to notice, it wasn't until we ran several tests that we discovered it, its progressed beyond the point of treatment… we’ve stabilized him for now… but that is a temporary measure… I think… you’d better say you goodbyes…” Yuto heard a man’s voice, and shortly after the voices of nine boys who had been crying just moments before.
Slowly he opened his eyes to see the pure white room that he was laying in, gently he took in his situation. The feeling of the needles in his arm keeping him alive, with the drugs he was sure wouldn't sustain him much longer.
“Yuto?!” Yabu asked eagerly as the rest of the boys surrounded the bed.
“I… I don't want… to die…” Yuto said quietly as the nine other faces around him looked at each other, unable to say anything.
“I don't want to… I want to live… I want to live… please…” Yuto pleaded to an invisible entity and he sat up as his weakened body protested.
“Yuto! You should lay down!”
“I don't want any of it! I don't want this! I just….. I just want… unhh!” Yuto screamed as he ripped out the IV needles in his arm and he winced as he felt himself hit the ground of the hospital floor. Immediately, hands flew out to help him stand up, but as they tried to push him back onto the bed, he shoved forward.
“I don't want to die!” He shouted as he felt the tears in his eyes again.
He ran and ran as he felt the last of his waning strength leaving him still more quickly than before. The dark outline of the street outside came closer as he came to the front of the hospital and he burst out the door as his legs gave way and he collapsed on the pavement in front. In the dead of the night, there was no one to see him die now, there was no one to comfort him, and no one for him to choose from.
“N-Nii-Chan?” Yuto turned to see his brother standing with his mother and father, they had both clearly been crying on the drive to the hospital, and Raiya remained unaware still, but those innocent eyes always picked up on things, even if he were not told.
“Rai..ya..” Yuto panted as he felt his heart stab suddenly and stop and he drew his last breath. The last thing his tired body felt, was the cold cement beneath him. The hands of his friends, his family helping him back up, was a warmth he never felt… and never would again...
---
“Welcome back… Yuto-kun…” Yuto blinked as he saw the familiar place and the familiar face of Rael, the Angel of Love.
“I… I didn't …. I couldn't…” Yuto shook his head and Rael nodded.
“Normally… if you had… the angels of fate, would have weaved your thread in tandem with the one you’ve chosen, and your lives would become inextricably bound to each others. But now… with no one to string it along,… “ Rael turned to look at Yuto and he gently laid a comforting hand on Yuto’s shoulder.
Yuto!
“H-Huh?” Yuto turned around as he heard the cries of his friends and Rael turned to look at him again,
The voices began to get louder still,
“Rael!” Rael!” A lesser angel flew in and Yuto turned to see the two whispering urgently and without a word Rael followed and Yuto ran after the two.
“This has never happened before…” Yuto heard the lesser angel say as they entered the giant room that housed the many threads of all the people in the world. He felt himself be drawn to his own thread, but where it once rested, he found a bundle instead. He gasped as the familiar glows of the strings became familiar to him, and he watched as 12 strings twisted their way around his and the pale whiteness of his own thread began to curl and weave itself in between the patterns the other strings left. Still growing he felt himself become more and more corporeal as his thread curved along the glowing strings and into the giant mass of strings that created the world of lines. Where his thread had ended and where it had picked up he didn't know anymore, the solid knot formed by the other 12 threads, the threads of his loved ones, his friends completely covered it up.
“Well done… Yuto-kun…” Rael’s voice grew more and more distant as Yuto felt himself yanked back down to earth and his body beckoned for him to return.
“What’s going on?” The angel asked.
“Love… is taking its course… the only thing more powerful than fate…. Love…. Can change…..”
Yuto felt the tugging grow stronger and he felt his entire being being pulled through the clouds.
“Love can change… anything.” The last word rippled in the air as he felt himself be pulled into his body again and his soul joined with his body and became corporeal again.
“Yuto!” He heard the boys around him cry as his ears became shrill again from the sobs and his eyes fluttered as they tried to take in everything again.
“He He’s alive! His eyes! His eyes!” Chinen jumped as the other boys took a moment to compose themselves before looking.
“Yuto.. you’re alive! You’re alive! Thank god…” Keito sighed in relief as he wiped away still flowing tears from his eyes.
“Don't scare us like that!” Ryutaro said, doing the same.
“Thank goodness you’re still here.. we were so…” Ryosuke said, putting on a brave face.
“I know… but… its… thanks to you…all of you… that I’m still here….”
Yuto’s body felt weak, but as he spoke he could still imagine his pale thread growing stronger and for a brief second, he could see Rael smiling and nodding. The stabbing pain in his chest lessened.
“I wasn't saved by god…. I was saved, by your kindness.. by your…”
“save your breath, didn't you just escape death?” Hikaru said, wiping away his tears with a goofy smile.
“Just rest Yuto… just rest…”Daiki said quietly pulling the blanket around him.
“I was saved… by the will of your hearts… I was saved by… your love.”
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Uwa! I hope you like this... T_T It's been an idea of mine for quite a while... I don't know how you all took the ending… but just remember, cruel comments are a type of feedback too…. I cant get better if I don't know what I’m doing wrong! This is the first type of this story i've tried.....
Please let me know what you think! Comments are <3
~Emmie