empty

[emmalayee]

i'm just so stunned and speechless...i'll explain it to you guys later.

...that's all for now.

Comments

[magictechie]

emptiness is a symptom of depression. don't let it take hold of you. eat some chocolate.

[emmalayee]

jeff and i broke up...

it wasn't a secret paller

[magictechie]

yep i figured as much. having written many ambiguous, anguished things from when mahonri and i broke up, i recognized it immeadetaly. but i'm serious, don't let sadness become depression. and eat some chocolate. i recomend ben and jerrys. maybe watcha good movie where everyone is more sad than you. and laugh at them.

give the details when you feel comfortable. it will all be ok.

Re: it wasn't a secret paller

[emmalayee]

it was all him. he began to feel that ultimately we weren't going to be right for each other in the end. so, rather than waiting it out and having it hurt more for both us somewhere down the road, he decided to actually listen to himself and act on that.

we're still good friends so far. these past few days we've still hung out quite a bit--he doesn't want any apect of our friendship to change, and was greatful when i finally agreed to remain friends b/c initially i didn't think it would be a good idea. but i think that's actually helping me through this terrible transition in some messed up way. i really couldn't picture him just being cut out of my life, but it's still so hard to face.

i cried so much initially, but i'm starting to get control of myself and understand that things happen for a reason, and so i just keep telling myself that, and it helps. of course i don't know the reasons for it now, but eventually it'll all make sense again.