OH NO YOU DIDN'T
JOHNNYS FANGIRLING = INCEST
Sobbing, you guys. SOBBING. somewhat hysterically. This was legit the conclusion of a Japanese ACADEMIC ARTICLE about Johnny's fans. I - having read up on academic writing on fans, unlike SOMEBODY - weep.
After a lengthy 'this is what JE fans are' bit (apparently you even have to diet before going to a concert! also, learn the choreography, idek how that works, also glorious examples such as, if you go from being a Jin fan to a Yamada fan, you say 'Jin kara Ryosuke ni furiru' in Japanese. I bet you were dying to know that.) she started pretty well with an incomprehensible Totemism theory that was basically about identification (which is pretty integral to the whole fandom thing) and then she's like. OKAY AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. and decides that basically fans have a pseudo mother/child relation with their favourite idol AS WELL AS a pseudo romantic/sexual relation. (Because you know, we consume their half naked photos and ero dances and songs full of sexual hints. This is all the ~academic basis~ she can manage) First she links this to pedophilia and then in the conclusion IT IS INCEST GUYS. This is all why it's embarrassing to let people know you are a JE fan.
and I was like OH NO YOU DIDN'T.
The kicker comes at the very end when the dirty whore (I struggled through 27 pages of ~academic Japanese~ and, okay, some quotes from Utaban, for this crap) confesses she is a fan herself (AND INCEST IS THE BEST SHE CAN DO?) and is basically all yeaaaaaaah, this might be subjectiiiiive yada yada. IMPRESSED I AM NOT.
I just want to tear her entire argumentation to tiny. little. pieces. Unfortunately, the paper I have to write tomorrow about it has other objectives and I have to compare it to another paper and lol there are no similarities and I will dieeeeeee. and then. On the afternoon of CHRISTMAS EVE. I have my last exam and I WILL HAVE ONE WEEK OF GLORIOUS FREEEEDOOOOM YES. and I will make happy posts about jehols and sparkly things. lalalala
and you thought the gay porn was the reason for that ticket to hell.