Politically Correct ch. 09
This chapter wouldn't have happened without Coffee, Tea, Salad, Sandwich, and Lady Gaga. Which, combined, pulled me out of my first (mini) writer's block.
Finals next week. One of my profs is giving us 48 hours to write a 10-15 page paper. Unfortunately for me, I have 2 other finals during those 48 hours (which automatically slashes 6 hours) not to mention sleep and the fact that I commute. So, no updates until after the 14th (NEXT Friday). After which I've got ALL DAY to write. (until summer session starts)
Title: Politically Correct
Rating: M
Word Count: 3,763
Pairing: eventual Zoro x Sanji + a smattering of side pairings
Summary: AU set in the San Francisco Bay Area Nami has decided that she's tired of Sanji constantly chasing after girls only to be taken advantage of & decides to take a more active role in Sanji committing to a Real Relationship.
Disclaimer: One Piece = Odacchi <3.
Notes: This chapter gave me a lot of issues. I'm still a bit unsatisfied with it, but I can't really find anything to change. Lots of talking, though. Unavoidable talking, but... still. =/ (Seems I tend to dislike chapters with heavy dialogue)
[Previous Chapters]
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“Do you guys think this is a bit much? I mean, I know that I agreed to do a cameo, but casting me as a traditional dancing girl…? Not that I have anything against dancing girls, but isn’t this costume a bit too revealing?”
Vivi looked up, finally noticing the silence and stillness in the room. Everyone had been looking over at the couch, where she could see Zoro watching TV, but then they turned to look at her.
“A-ahh. Vivi,” Sanji looked dazed, “my lovely princess! Those clothes suit you wonderfully!”
Sanji’s heart was pounding in his ears. He wasn’t sure it was much better than the mini heart-attack it felt like he had suffered after Zoro had opened his mouth. Okay. Okay. Focus on Vivi. The half-naked, soft, and silky royalty standing in front of you. Not that fucker over there. That asshole whose throat I’m going to fucking tear out.
He smiled. “You have such a lovely figure, my dear. It would be a pity not to take this chance to share it with the world! ” Alright. What are we going to do about damage control?
“Oh~ Saannnjiiiiiiiiii. You don’t really think I’m going to let you just brush off something like that, do you?” He inwardly cringed, making sure to keep the smile plastered on his face. He slowly turned back to face Nami.
“But, mellorine! Shouldn’t we wait for Robin-chwan to get here before we discuss my… answer to your question?” I wonder if I’d be able to book a flight to Paris before then.
Her brows furrowed slightly. She did a quick mental run through of all her recent conversations with Sanji and Robin. I don’t even know which one of my brilliant plans I’ve actually put into action. There are so many possibilities… “Answer to my question?”
Sanji wanted to grind his teeth. “Don’t you remember, love? You asked me a question that I couldn’t answer and our dear Robin seemed to be of the mindset that I should know the answer so I… did the research.”
“Ahhh yes. That question.” She shifted a little closer to Sanji. “I can’t wait to hear the results of your research.”
“Sounds like you were a guinea pig, man.” Ace had perched himself on the edge of the couch behind Zoro.
“A well-fed, sexually satisfied guinea pig that gets plenty of exercise? Doesn’t sound like a bad life to me.”
“That’s it! Say another word I’m going to crush your goddamn windpipe.” Sanji lifted a leg in preparation, but promptly planted it back on the ground as pain shot up his lower back. Ow ow ow. Shit. This isn’t going to work. He settled for glaring.
Nami had twisted in her seat at Zoro’s voice, as if she had forgotten he was even there. “And Zoro! How kind of you to volunteer your services in helping Sanji with -“
Vivi lightly placed her hand on Nami’s shoulder. The red-head looked up at her inquisitively. “Um, Sanji. I just remembered that I skipped lunch. Would it be too much trouble to ask if you could throw something together for me?”
Oh, Thank God. “Absolument, ma chérie! I’ll make something filling, but light enough that it won’t ruin your appetite for dinner.” He pecked her on the cheek before throwing another icy glare at Zoro and disappearing into the kitchen.
Nami pouted as the blue-haired girl took the seat next to her. “I didn’t get to hear any juicy bits yet.”
Vivi’s cheeks reddened. She scooted her chair closer to Nami and leaned in just the slightest, voice quiet. “Nami, when I agreed to convince Zoro that he didn’t need to personally accompany me all day, you said that it was because you thought Zoro was a good candidate for Sanji being in a serious relationship. So, if Sanji and Zoro did… err… become intimate… then shouldn’t we be encouraging it?”
Nami looked down. She felt like a kid who had just been scolded. “I know. I know. You’re absolutely right, but it’s just so fun to tease him. Especially about this.” Vivi looked at her reproachfully and Nami sighed dejectedly. “Indeed, I had a purpose and I need to stick with it. But I still need to do this my way, Vivi. I’ll try not to tease him as much, but it should be fine as long as I don’t scare him off.”
Vivi gave her a tentative smile of approval. “Then…” she leaned in closer, conspiratorially, “I’d be happy to help in any other ways you see fit. It’s been worrying me a bit that spending all this time as my bodyguard hasn’t seemed to have disrupted our dear swordsman’s life much at all.” Nami grinned. Having Vivi offer to help out would make things a lot easier.
“What do you think they’re talking about?”
Zoro looked towards the two girls whispering at the table and then back at Ace. “Why the hell should I care?”
“Because I bet that it has to do with your scandalous little revelation. And, seriously Zoro, didn’t I teach you any manners? You’re not supposed to kiss and tell. Especially not right in front of the person involved. Unless you never want to see a piece of that ass again. And I think having a regular fuck buddy might be a good thing for you. I mean, sure, I’d prefer if you actually got serious for once, but I’ll take what you can get.”
Zoro nodded absentmindedly. He was straining to hear the sounds of the cook moving around the kitchen. Zoro had been prepared for Sanji to lash out at him physically after the blunt admission and hadn’t missed the look of discomfort before the blonde had suddenly withdrawn his leg.
The guy was in pain and his adamant dismissal was pissing Zoro off. “I’m getting another drink.” He got up and headed towards the kitchen.
“Really, Zoro? Not even going to try to pretend you’ve heard a word I’ve said?”
“Yeah, sure. I’ll grab you another bottle.” He shut the door behind him. Sanji didn’t notice him come in. He stayed focused on the food he was preparing.
Zoro always found himself captivated by Sanji in the kitchen. The way the room smelled fantastic even if the chef was only throwing together a salad. The way he knew where everything was without looking and when everything was done without a timer. The complete focus and precision of every movement.
Zoro watched as Sanji paused, doing some sort of mental calculation before pulling a dish out of the oven. After setting the food down he cracked his neck and stretched his arms over his head before bending over to touch his toes. He grumbled out a few curses before straightening up and rubbing his lower back with one hand.
“Dammit, cook!”
Sanji jumped, startled. “What the hell is your problem, bastard marimo?!”
“My problem is that you’re trying to brush off the fact that you’re hurt.”
Sanji glowered defiantly down at the pieces of chicken he was cutting. “Whatever, seaweed-top. So what if my ass is a little sore. Don’t tell me you’re suddenly concerned about my well-being after all our fights? And you sure as hell had better not be pitying me. Especially NOT after that little stunt you just pulled.”
Sanji turned to throw a look of disgust at the man who had disturbed the peace of his kitchen. He had expected to be met with eyes full of ridicule. Instead, Zoro looked somewhat defeated.
“Fighting’s different, you idiot. Sure, that’s all about physical domination and pain is accepted, and okay, maybe I don’t know what kind of sex you’re usually into, but for me it’s supposed to be pleasurable for both sides. I try to keep pain out of the bedroom, thanks.”
Sanji began cutting into a watermelon. Well, that definitely wasn’t what I was expecting. “Are we really having this conversation right now?”
Zoro didn’t say anything.
“Honestly, Zoro. You can’t possibly be THIS thick. It’s like… the hangover after your 21st birthday. How terrible you feel the morning after is generally a good indicator of just how fucking great the night before must’ve been.”
A corner of Zoro’s mouth quirked up. “Are you saying I was fucking great, cook?”
Sanji balanced multiple plates, moving around the counter. As he passed by Zoro he said, voice low, “No. I’m criticizing the fact that I can walk at all.” He glided towards the door, cooing. “Namiiii, Viiiviiiii, I bring you food cooked with the love and attention deserving of fine beauties such as yourselves! There’s a plate for you too, Ace.” He threw Zoro a sultry look before the door closed behind him.
Sanji figured there wasn’t much he could do about Zoro’s little announcement and, really, it made things a lot simpler. But there’s no way in hell I’m going to just let him off the hook for it, either.
The kitchen door swung open once again as Zoro stomped out, heading straight for his weights. Ace looked over at him, curious. “Hey, what happened to the beer?”
“Drank it.” He stripped off his shirt and began adding more weight plates to his barbell. Sanji’s words had conjured up images of just what it’d be like to fuck the cook to the point that he couldn’t walk. Goddammit. I’ve got more self-control than this!
Sanji lit a smug cigarette and watched as the rattled swordsman attempted to sweat out the thoughts he’d planted.
“I may just be stating the obvious, but Zoro’s really got quite a nice body.” Nami popped one of the watermelon cubes Sanji had set out into her mouth. Vivi gave her a nervous glance. “Come on, Vivi. I’m just admiring the man, what, with his toned muscles rippling under that taught skin…”
“…and the way the sweat collects at the hair on the nape of his neck before it rolls down his strong muscular back.” Vivi threw Ace a look that screamed not you too!
Sanji snapped out of his mini-reverie, feeling oddly self-conscious as he realized that Nami and Ace had practically been narrating his own thoughts. “I’m going to go do the dishes.”
Nami gave him a knowing smirk as he once again sought refuge in the kitchen.
It shouldn’t even bother me that everyone knows. It was a onetime thing. He thought about his earlier provocation. How much it sounded like a challenge. And how much he wanted the swordsman to take him up on it. Okay, well, it’s not like feelings are involved. He considered it a small victory and spent his time scrubbing dishes while very much not thinking about Zoro exercising in the other room.
When he finally walked back into the rec room both Nami and Vivi were putting on their coats. “Oh? Are the two of you gorgeous wonders heading out?” He tried to keep the hope out of his voice.
“We’re going to meet Robin on set. They wanted me to wear the costume around outside for a little bit, just to make sure it’s comfortable enough.” Vivi tugged on the skimpy barely-clothes.
Nami tossed Sanji his coat. “You’re coming with us.”
He froze. “Ahhh, as much as I would love to be your escort…”
“Zoro already said you could take over for today.”
Sanji looked over at the shirtless man, now doing pushups. “I’m taking you up on your offer, cook. Unless you’re taking it back?”
Sanji knew he should be pissed. The bastard was probably doing it because he knew sticking Sanji with the girls all day would lead to endless uncomfortable conversations. Instead, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction that the hardass was including him in the group of people he trusted. The fact that the guy had actually taken Sanji’s earlier complaint into serious consideration meant something. Zoro had known Ace, Luffy, Usopp, and Franky for years. Sanji was well-aware of the fact that he was still a relatively unknown and risky element.
Zoro turned his head just in time to catch Sanji’s subtle nod of appreciation.
“Well then, we shouldn’t keep a lady like Robin waiting any longer than absolutely necessary.” He followed the girls to Nami’s car. She hated having to rely on public transportation, especially when she could navigate through city traffic better than the most terrifying of cabbies. She also had a knack for hitting every green light. Although, whether it was because of her impeccable timing or because she secretly owned a device that could trigger green lights, Sanji couldn’t say. Nami was very much capable of both.
Five minutes later, Sanji was helping Vivi out of the car. She looked slightly queasy.
He looked around. “This isn’t the Navy base. This is Treasure Island.”
“They only film the action scenes on the base because the area is safer for explosions and large battle scenes. The main studio set up is on this island since there are a bunch of buildings we can use for the indoor scenes and we’re not limited to the warehouses.” Vivi had started making her way to the nearest building.
“Too bad, huh?” Nami hooked her arm around Sanji’s. “Now that you know, you won’t have an excuse to visit Zoro on his set. Though I suppose you could always play dumb.”
Sanji was torn between the happiness of Nami initiating the affectionate contact and the reminder that there was a Something that they had yet to discuss. “My dear mellorine, I would be a fool if I ever chose to watch that uncouth idiot play-fight when I could instead be spending such precious moments in your presence.”
“Yes, ofcourse, why would you have any reason to watch Zoro film action scenes… when you’re already getting some action from him in private.”
“Exactly, love, why should I watch him fight when I already kick his ass, pardon my French, on a nearly daily basis?”
“Feel free to pretend that’s what I meant, Sanji.” Nami kissed him on the cheek. “You’re only lying to yourself.” She let go of his arm and practically skipped ahead to Vivi.
Sanji loved this girl. She could do no wrong. She was brilliant and amazing.
There was nothing she could do or say that would ever make him think badly of her.
Mind over matter. Mind over matter.
“You understand that she only does this because she cares, right Sanji?” Robin’s arm had stealthily replaced Nami’s.
“Robin-chwaan~ I hope you didn’t wait for too long?”
She smiled at him. “I’ve just gotten here myself.” The building they had entered was eerily quiet. “Nami and Vivi both have their own business to attend to. I’m usually just here for reference if ever it’s needed.” She led him to a table surrounded by cushioned seats. They had a clear view of Vivi as the wardrobe staff fussed over her.
“Now, my dear cook, would you like to breech today’s hot gossip or shall I?” Sanji stiffened. He had come to the conclusion that resisting would only prolong the pain and ultimately lead to the same outcome. So he’d do it the thick-headed swordsman’s way. Except less crude.
Robin patted his arm. “You don’t have to look so apprehensive. Our lovely Miss Nami has, no doubt, given you all sorts of misleading ideas as to what it is we’re going to ask. But we’re your friends, Sanji, and we respect your privacy. We won’t go so far as to insist that you give us details. Even if our actions seem to contradict it, we’d never want to force you or even pressure you into anything we thought you were truly against. We just want to see you happy, Sanji.”
He gave her a genuine smile. “Robin, I would never blame such a thing on either of you. My actions don’t stem from some deep-seated sense of obligation. I am my own self and I do things because I want to. If your words ever prompt me to do something that may seem uncharacteristic of me, it’s because I respect and trust your opinion. But, ultimately, the choice is mine.” Straightforward. Don’t avoid it. “And that applies to my, ahhh... current situation, as well.”
Robin returned the smile. “That’s quite a relief to hear. Especially since…” She pulled out a small black gift bag. “Nami and I have been planning on giving this to you, but, honestly, we didn’t expect you to make a move so soon.”
Sanji felt a sense of foreboding as she slid the bag towards him. He opened it and stared at the contents. Ofcourse. Sanji cracked up.
Robin’s grin widened. “Now that’s a reaction I’d love explained. Though I can probably guess its source. We assumed you didn’t own any yourself which would mean… I do wonder what you used instead. I think olive oil would be the best alternative, and fitting for a chef, but lotion is generally the most convenient. I sincerely hope you didn’t go dry, Sanji. I’d have to have a word with our swordsman friend for ever agreeing if that were the case. Proper lube is not optional for anal sex.”
So much for no details. “Wouldn’t it have just been easier for Nami, brilliant and fantastic woman that she is, to lift the ban she’s placed on my… mingling with other women?”
One of the stage hands approached their table. “Excuse me, Miss Nico, we had a question concerning the super spot-billed ducks of Alabastan mythology. If you had a moment?”
Robin nodded. “Ah, of course, I’ll be there in a second.” She gave Sanji a calculating look. “Nami’s right, you’re still in semi-denial. Think about it, Sanji. When was the last time she actually enforced that little restriction?” She sighed as she stood up. ”You know just as well as we do that it was only a convenient excuse for you to avoid another deceptive relationship under the pretense of true love. You can continue to insist that what happened was purely to satisfy your need for physical release. But perhaps you should take some time to seriously consider why you were so willing to take my and Nami’s suggestions.”
She walked away. Sanji sat, speechless. He was beginning to wonder if, just maybe, he would have preferred being forced to draw diagrams detailing his ‘morning activity’.
He tried to focus his attention back on watching Vivi, but his eyes kept slipping back to the black bag in front of him.
He was trying to understand how Robin could hand him a bag with a bottle of lube and then go on to suggest that his romp with Zoro wasn’t about physical release.
I love the women in my life. I understand them and their needs. It was when they started thinking about his needs that he found himself at a complete loss.
By the time Nami, Robin, and Vivi were ready to go, Sanji had decided that, as soon as he finished cooking dinner for the girls, he’d go straight home and sleep through the rest of the already-much-too-long day.
Fuck. I still need to wash my sheets.
XXXXXXXXXXX
Zoro stared up at the dark ceiling. He could see his alarm clock glowing *3:17am* in his periphery.
It was silent.
Something had woken him up.
Something was wrong.
He made sure to keep his breathing steady and slow. His hand edged towards his swords. He was completely alert, shoving off his blankets as silently as possible. He slid onto the floor and crept through the darkness towards his door.
There was a nearly silent rustle as a dark shadow made its way down the hall. Towards Vivi’s room.
In a flash his sword was against the flesh of the intruder’s throat. “Try anything and I won’t hesitate to cut you up.” Zoro’s low growl carried through the silence.
“I need to speak to Vivi.” He didn’t recognize the voice.
“At half-past three in the morning? I wouldn’t give anymore bullshit excuses if I were you.” Zoro was at a loss as to what he was supposed to do with the guy. He didn’t have hand-cuffs and he wasn’t really interested in actually killing anyone.
“I wanted to speak to her without anyone knowing.” Zoro was almost surprised by how steady the voice was.
“Sorry that didn’t work out for you.” He spun the stranger around and slammed the handle of his katana into the guy’s jaw, making sure to catch the limp body before it hit the ground. Chakka and Pell should’ve left instructions.
The lights suddenly flicked on and Zoro squinted against the sudden brightness.
“Zoro?” Vivi stood at her door, rubbing her eyes. “I heard voices.”
“You had a visitor, but I figured he could wait ‘til morning.” Zoro dragged the unconscious man over to his bed. “You should probably call the cops while I find a way to restrain him.”
Vivi took a step forward. “Kohza?”
Zoro stared at her. “What?”
She rushed over to the bed. “Oh, god. I know him, Zoro. I grew up with him. He’s a childhood friend.”
“Friend? Then why the hell didn’t he just call instead of pulling some shit like this?”
She was silent for a second. “Probably because he’s the leader of the rebels.”
“What? The whole reason I’m here is to protect you from this guy and he’s your friend?”
She looked up at Zoro apologetically. “He’s safe, Zoro. This is why I kept trying to convince you that Chakka and Pell were overreacting, but those two have been on edge since the rebels ramped up their protests and began openly harassing Baroque Works.”
“Vivi, you’re going to make my job difficult, aren’t you?” And you’re going to make me have to ask the cook about what the hell’s going on in your country.
“Kohza would never hurt me, Zoro.”
He went to grab his phone. “Fine, you guys can talk when he wakes up, but I’m going to call some of the guys over and he’s not getting anywhere near you until I’m convinced that he’s safe.” He watched Vivi’s face fill with concern as she noticed the bruise blooming where Zoro had hit the other man. “I’ll be sure to call Chopper first so he can make sure this guy’s okay.”
“Thank you, Zoro.”
He took a deep breath before making the call. The young doctor had already lectured Zoro on the lasting physical damage that could result from being knocked out by a physical blow.
Chopper’s going to kill me.
chapter 10
Finals next week. One of my profs is giving us 48 hours to write a 10-15 page paper. Unfortunately for me, I have 2 other finals during those 48 hours (which automatically slashes 6 hours) not to mention sleep and the fact that I commute. So, no updates until after the 14th (NEXT Friday). After which I've got ALL DAY to write. (until summer session starts)
Title: Politically Correct
Rating: M
Word Count: 3,763
Pairing: eventual Zoro x Sanji + a smattering of side pairings
Summary: AU set in the San Francisco Bay Area Nami has decided that she's tired of Sanji constantly chasing after girls only to be taken advantage of & decides to take a more active role in Sanji committing to a Real Relationship.
Disclaimer: One Piece = Odacchi <3.
Notes: This chapter gave me a lot of issues. I'm still a bit unsatisfied with it, but I can't really find anything to change. Lots of talking, though. Unavoidable talking, but... still. =/ (Seems I tend to dislike chapters with heavy dialogue)
[Previous Chapters]
lilililililililililililililililililililililililili
“Do you guys think this is a bit much? I mean, I know that I agreed to do a cameo, but casting me as a traditional dancing girl…? Not that I have anything against dancing girls, but isn’t this costume a bit too revealing?”
Vivi looked up, finally noticing the silence and stillness in the room. Everyone had been looking over at the couch, where she could see Zoro watching TV, but then they turned to look at her.
“A-ahh. Vivi,” Sanji looked dazed, “my lovely princess! Those clothes suit you wonderfully!”
Sanji’s heart was pounding in his ears. He wasn’t sure it was much better than the mini heart-attack it felt like he had suffered after Zoro had opened his mouth. Okay. Okay. Focus on Vivi. The half-naked, soft, and silky royalty standing in front of you. Not that fucker over there. That asshole whose throat I’m going to fucking tear out.
He smiled. “You have such a lovely figure, my dear. It would be a pity not to take this chance to share it with the world! ” Alright. What are we going to do about damage control?
“Oh~ Saannnjiiiiiiiiii. You don’t really think I’m going to let you just brush off something like that, do you?” He inwardly cringed, making sure to keep the smile plastered on his face. He slowly turned back to face Nami.
“But, mellorine! Shouldn’t we wait for Robin-chwan to get here before we discuss my… answer to your question?” I wonder if I’d be able to book a flight to Paris before then.
Her brows furrowed slightly. She did a quick mental run through of all her recent conversations with Sanji and Robin. I don’t even know which one of my brilliant plans I’ve actually put into action. There are so many possibilities… “Answer to my question?”
Sanji wanted to grind his teeth. “Don’t you remember, love? You asked me a question that I couldn’t answer and our dear Robin seemed to be of the mindset that I should know the answer so I… did the research.”
“Ahhh yes. That question.” She shifted a little closer to Sanji. “I can’t wait to hear the results of your research.”
“Sounds like you were a guinea pig, man.” Ace had perched himself on the edge of the couch behind Zoro.
“A well-fed, sexually satisfied guinea pig that gets plenty of exercise? Doesn’t sound like a bad life to me.”
“That’s it! Say another word I’m going to crush your goddamn windpipe.” Sanji lifted a leg in preparation, but promptly planted it back on the ground as pain shot up his lower back. Ow ow ow. Shit. This isn’t going to work. He settled for glaring.
Nami had twisted in her seat at Zoro’s voice, as if she had forgotten he was even there. “And Zoro! How kind of you to volunteer your services in helping Sanji with -“
Vivi lightly placed her hand on Nami’s shoulder. The red-head looked up at her inquisitively. “Um, Sanji. I just remembered that I skipped lunch. Would it be too much trouble to ask if you could throw something together for me?”
Oh, Thank God. “Absolument, ma chérie! I’ll make something filling, but light enough that it won’t ruin your appetite for dinner.” He pecked her on the cheek before throwing another icy glare at Zoro and disappearing into the kitchen.
Nami pouted as the blue-haired girl took the seat next to her. “I didn’t get to hear any juicy bits yet.”
Vivi’s cheeks reddened. She scooted her chair closer to Nami and leaned in just the slightest, voice quiet. “Nami, when I agreed to convince Zoro that he didn’t need to personally accompany me all day, you said that it was because you thought Zoro was a good candidate for Sanji being in a serious relationship. So, if Sanji and Zoro did… err… become intimate… then shouldn’t we be encouraging it?”
Nami looked down. She felt like a kid who had just been scolded. “I know. I know. You’re absolutely right, but it’s just so fun to tease him. Especially about this.” Vivi looked at her reproachfully and Nami sighed dejectedly. “Indeed, I had a purpose and I need to stick with it. But I still need to do this my way, Vivi. I’ll try not to tease him as much, but it should be fine as long as I don’t scare him off.”
Vivi gave her a tentative smile of approval. “Then…” she leaned in closer, conspiratorially, “I’d be happy to help in any other ways you see fit. It’s been worrying me a bit that spending all this time as my bodyguard hasn’t seemed to have disrupted our dear swordsman’s life much at all.” Nami grinned. Having Vivi offer to help out would make things a lot easier.
“What do you think they’re talking about?”
Zoro looked towards the two girls whispering at the table and then back at Ace. “Why the hell should I care?”
“Because I bet that it has to do with your scandalous little revelation. And, seriously Zoro, didn’t I teach you any manners? You’re not supposed to kiss and tell. Especially not right in front of the person involved. Unless you never want to see a piece of that ass again. And I think having a regular fuck buddy might be a good thing for you. I mean, sure, I’d prefer if you actually got serious for once, but I’ll take what you can get.”
Zoro nodded absentmindedly. He was straining to hear the sounds of the cook moving around the kitchen. Zoro had been prepared for Sanji to lash out at him physically after the blunt admission and hadn’t missed the look of discomfort before the blonde had suddenly withdrawn his leg.
The guy was in pain and his adamant dismissal was pissing Zoro off. “I’m getting another drink.” He got up and headed towards the kitchen.
“Really, Zoro? Not even going to try to pretend you’ve heard a word I’ve said?”
“Yeah, sure. I’ll grab you another bottle.” He shut the door behind him. Sanji didn’t notice him come in. He stayed focused on the food he was preparing.
Zoro always found himself captivated by Sanji in the kitchen. The way the room smelled fantastic even if the chef was only throwing together a salad. The way he knew where everything was without looking and when everything was done without a timer. The complete focus and precision of every movement.
Zoro watched as Sanji paused, doing some sort of mental calculation before pulling a dish out of the oven. After setting the food down he cracked his neck and stretched his arms over his head before bending over to touch his toes. He grumbled out a few curses before straightening up and rubbing his lower back with one hand.
“Dammit, cook!”
Sanji jumped, startled. “What the hell is your problem, bastard marimo?!”
“My problem is that you’re trying to brush off the fact that you’re hurt.”
Sanji glowered defiantly down at the pieces of chicken he was cutting. “Whatever, seaweed-top. So what if my ass is a little sore. Don’t tell me you’re suddenly concerned about my well-being after all our fights? And you sure as hell had better not be pitying me. Especially NOT after that little stunt you just pulled.”
Sanji turned to throw a look of disgust at the man who had disturbed the peace of his kitchen. He had expected to be met with eyes full of ridicule. Instead, Zoro looked somewhat defeated.
“Fighting’s different, you idiot. Sure, that’s all about physical domination and pain is accepted, and okay, maybe I don’t know what kind of sex you’re usually into, but for me it’s supposed to be pleasurable for both sides. I try to keep pain out of the bedroom, thanks.”
Sanji began cutting into a watermelon. Well, that definitely wasn’t what I was expecting. “Are we really having this conversation right now?”
Zoro didn’t say anything.
“Honestly, Zoro. You can’t possibly be THIS thick. It’s like… the hangover after your 21st birthday. How terrible you feel the morning after is generally a good indicator of just how fucking great the night before must’ve been.”
A corner of Zoro’s mouth quirked up. “Are you saying I was fucking great, cook?”
Sanji balanced multiple plates, moving around the counter. As he passed by Zoro he said, voice low, “No. I’m criticizing the fact that I can walk at all.” He glided towards the door, cooing. “Namiiii, Viiiviiiii, I bring you food cooked with the love and attention deserving of fine beauties such as yourselves! There’s a plate for you too, Ace.” He threw Zoro a sultry look before the door closed behind him.
Sanji figured there wasn’t much he could do about Zoro’s little announcement and, really, it made things a lot simpler. But there’s no way in hell I’m going to just let him off the hook for it, either.
The kitchen door swung open once again as Zoro stomped out, heading straight for his weights. Ace looked over at him, curious. “Hey, what happened to the beer?”
“Drank it.” He stripped off his shirt and began adding more weight plates to his barbell. Sanji’s words had conjured up images of just what it’d be like to fuck the cook to the point that he couldn’t walk. Goddammit. I’ve got more self-control than this!
Sanji lit a smug cigarette and watched as the rattled swordsman attempted to sweat out the thoughts he’d planted.
“I may just be stating the obvious, but Zoro’s really got quite a nice body.” Nami popped one of the watermelon cubes Sanji had set out into her mouth. Vivi gave her a nervous glance. “Come on, Vivi. I’m just admiring the man, what, with his toned muscles rippling under that taught skin…”
“…and the way the sweat collects at the hair on the nape of his neck before it rolls down his strong muscular back.” Vivi threw Ace a look that screamed not you too!
Sanji snapped out of his mini-reverie, feeling oddly self-conscious as he realized that Nami and Ace had practically been narrating his own thoughts. “I’m going to go do the dishes.”
Nami gave him a knowing smirk as he once again sought refuge in the kitchen.
It shouldn’t even bother me that everyone knows. It was a onetime thing. He thought about his earlier provocation. How much it sounded like a challenge. And how much he wanted the swordsman to take him up on it. Okay, well, it’s not like feelings are involved. He considered it a small victory and spent his time scrubbing dishes while very much not thinking about Zoro exercising in the other room.
When he finally walked back into the rec room both Nami and Vivi were putting on their coats. “Oh? Are the two of you gorgeous wonders heading out?” He tried to keep the hope out of his voice.
“We’re going to meet Robin on set. They wanted me to wear the costume around outside for a little bit, just to make sure it’s comfortable enough.” Vivi tugged on the skimpy barely-clothes.
Nami tossed Sanji his coat. “You’re coming with us.”
He froze. “Ahhh, as much as I would love to be your escort…”
“Zoro already said you could take over for today.”
Sanji looked over at the shirtless man, now doing pushups. “I’m taking you up on your offer, cook. Unless you’re taking it back?”
Sanji knew he should be pissed. The bastard was probably doing it because he knew sticking Sanji with the girls all day would lead to endless uncomfortable conversations. Instead, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction that the hardass was including him in the group of people he trusted. The fact that the guy had actually taken Sanji’s earlier complaint into serious consideration meant something. Zoro had known Ace, Luffy, Usopp, and Franky for years. Sanji was well-aware of the fact that he was still a relatively unknown and risky element.
Zoro turned his head just in time to catch Sanji’s subtle nod of appreciation.
“Well then, we shouldn’t keep a lady like Robin waiting any longer than absolutely necessary.” He followed the girls to Nami’s car. She hated having to rely on public transportation, especially when she could navigate through city traffic better than the most terrifying of cabbies. She also had a knack for hitting every green light. Although, whether it was because of her impeccable timing or because she secretly owned a device that could trigger green lights, Sanji couldn’t say. Nami was very much capable of both.
Five minutes later, Sanji was helping Vivi out of the car. She looked slightly queasy.
He looked around. “This isn’t the Navy base. This is Treasure Island.”
“They only film the action scenes on the base because the area is safer for explosions and large battle scenes. The main studio set up is on this island since there are a bunch of buildings we can use for the indoor scenes and we’re not limited to the warehouses.” Vivi had started making her way to the nearest building.
“Too bad, huh?” Nami hooked her arm around Sanji’s. “Now that you know, you won’t have an excuse to visit Zoro on his set. Though I suppose you could always play dumb.”
Sanji was torn between the happiness of Nami initiating the affectionate contact and the reminder that there was a Something that they had yet to discuss. “My dear mellorine, I would be a fool if I ever chose to watch that uncouth idiot play-fight when I could instead be spending such precious moments in your presence.”
“Yes, ofcourse, why would you have any reason to watch Zoro film action scenes… when you’re already getting some action from him in private.”
“Exactly, love, why should I watch him fight when I already kick his ass, pardon my French, on a nearly daily basis?”
“Feel free to pretend that’s what I meant, Sanji.” Nami kissed him on the cheek. “You’re only lying to yourself.” She let go of his arm and practically skipped ahead to Vivi.
Sanji loved this girl. She could do no wrong. She was brilliant and amazing.
There was nothing she could do or say that would ever make him think badly of her.
Mind over matter. Mind over matter.
“You understand that she only does this because she cares, right Sanji?” Robin’s arm had stealthily replaced Nami’s.
“Robin-chwaan~ I hope you didn’t wait for too long?”
She smiled at him. “I’ve just gotten here myself.” The building they had entered was eerily quiet. “Nami and Vivi both have their own business to attend to. I’m usually just here for reference if ever it’s needed.” She led him to a table surrounded by cushioned seats. They had a clear view of Vivi as the wardrobe staff fussed over her.
“Now, my dear cook, would you like to breech today’s hot gossip or shall I?” Sanji stiffened. He had come to the conclusion that resisting would only prolong the pain and ultimately lead to the same outcome. So he’d do it the thick-headed swordsman’s way. Except less crude.
Robin patted his arm. “You don’t have to look so apprehensive. Our lovely Miss Nami has, no doubt, given you all sorts of misleading ideas as to what it is we’re going to ask. But we’re your friends, Sanji, and we respect your privacy. We won’t go so far as to insist that you give us details. Even if our actions seem to contradict it, we’d never want to force you or even pressure you into anything we thought you were truly against. We just want to see you happy, Sanji.”
He gave her a genuine smile. “Robin, I would never blame such a thing on either of you. My actions don’t stem from some deep-seated sense of obligation. I am my own self and I do things because I want to. If your words ever prompt me to do something that may seem uncharacteristic of me, it’s because I respect and trust your opinion. But, ultimately, the choice is mine.” Straightforward. Don’t avoid it. “And that applies to my, ahhh... current situation, as well.”
Robin returned the smile. “That’s quite a relief to hear. Especially since…” She pulled out a small black gift bag. “Nami and I have been planning on giving this to you, but, honestly, we didn’t expect you to make a move so soon.”
Sanji felt a sense of foreboding as she slid the bag towards him. He opened it and stared at the contents. Ofcourse. Sanji cracked up.
Robin’s grin widened. “Now that’s a reaction I’d love explained. Though I can probably guess its source. We assumed you didn’t own any yourself which would mean… I do wonder what you used instead. I think olive oil would be the best alternative, and fitting for a chef, but lotion is generally the most convenient. I sincerely hope you didn’t go dry, Sanji. I’d have to have a word with our swordsman friend for ever agreeing if that were the case. Proper lube is not optional for anal sex.”
So much for no details. “Wouldn’t it have just been easier for Nami, brilliant and fantastic woman that she is, to lift the ban she’s placed on my… mingling with other women?”
One of the stage hands approached their table. “Excuse me, Miss Nico, we had a question concerning the super spot-billed ducks of Alabastan mythology. If you had a moment?”
Robin nodded. “Ah, of course, I’ll be there in a second.” She gave Sanji a calculating look. “Nami’s right, you’re still in semi-denial. Think about it, Sanji. When was the last time she actually enforced that little restriction?” She sighed as she stood up. ”You know just as well as we do that it was only a convenient excuse for you to avoid another deceptive relationship under the pretense of true love. You can continue to insist that what happened was purely to satisfy your need for physical release. But perhaps you should take some time to seriously consider why you were so willing to take my and Nami’s suggestions.”
She walked away. Sanji sat, speechless. He was beginning to wonder if, just maybe, he would have preferred being forced to draw diagrams detailing his ‘morning activity’.
He tried to focus his attention back on watching Vivi, but his eyes kept slipping back to the black bag in front of him.
He was trying to understand how Robin could hand him a bag with a bottle of lube and then go on to suggest that his romp with Zoro wasn’t about physical release.
I love the women in my life. I understand them and their needs. It was when they started thinking about his needs that he found himself at a complete loss.
By the time Nami, Robin, and Vivi were ready to go, Sanji had decided that, as soon as he finished cooking dinner for the girls, he’d go straight home and sleep through the rest of the already-much-too-long day.
Fuck. I still need to wash my sheets.
XXXXXXXXXXX
Zoro stared up at the dark ceiling. He could see his alarm clock glowing *3:17am* in his periphery.
It was silent.
Something had woken him up.
Something was wrong.
He made sure to keep his breathing steady and slow. His hand edged towards his swords. He was completely alert, shoving off his blankets as silently as possible. He slid onto the floor and crept through the darkness towards his door.
There was a nearly silent rustle as a dark shadow made its way down the hall. Towards Vivi’s room.
In a flash his sword was against the flesh of the intruder’s throat. “Try anything and I won’t hesitate to cut you up.” Zoro’s low growl carried through the silence.
“I need to speak to Vivi.” He didn’t recognize the voice.
“At half-past three in the morning? I wouldn’t give anymore bullshit excuses if I were you.” Zoro was at a loss as to what he was supposed to do with the guy. He didn’t have hand-cuffs and he wasn’t really interested in actually killing anyone.
“I wanted to speak to her without anyone knowing.” Zoro was almost surprised by how steady the voice was.
“Sorry that didn’t work out for you.” He spun the stranger around and slammed the handle of his katana into the guy’s jaw, making sure to catch the limp body before it hit the ground. Chakka and Pell should’ve left instructions.
The lights suddenly flicked on and Zoro squinted against the sudden brightness.
“Zoro?” Vivi stood at her door, rubbing her eyes. “I heard voices.”
“You had a visitor, but I figured he could wait ‘til morning.” Zoro dragged the unconscious man over to his bed. “You should probably call the cops while I find a way to restrain him.”
Vivi took a step forward. “Kohza?”
Zoro stared at her. “What?”
She rushed over to the bed. “Oh, god. I know him, Zoro. I grew up with him. He’s a childhood friend.”
“Friend? Then why the hell didn’t he just call instead of pulling some shit like this?”
She was silent for a second. “Probably because he’s the leader of the rebels.”
“What? The whole reason I’m here is to protect you from this guy and he’s your friend?”
She looked up at Zoro apologetically. “He’s safe, Zoro. This is why I kept trying to convince you that Chakka and Pell were overreacting, but those two have been on edge since the rebels ramped up their protests and began openly harassing Baroque Works.”
“Vivi, you’re going to make my job difficult, aren’t you?” And you’re going to make me have to ask the cook about what the hell’s going on in your country.
“Kohza would never hurt me, Zoro.”
He went to grab his phone. “Fine, you guys can talk when he wakes up, but I’m going to call some of the guys over and he’s not getting anywhere near you until I’m convinced that he’s safe.” He watched Vivi’s face fill with concern as she noticed the bruise blooming where Zoro had hit the other man. “I’ll be sure to call Chopper first so he can make sure this guy’s okay.”
“Thank you, Zoro.”
He took a deep breath before making the call. The young doctor had already lectured Zoro on the lasting physical damage that could result from being knocked out by a physical blow.
Chopper’s going to kill me.
chapter 10