[FIC] Do You Remember?
Title: Do You Remember?
Author: enrasin
Genre: friendship, romance
Rating: PG-13
Length: 3082 words
Pairing: HunHan
Summary: Sehun sees Luhan smile and his world turns upside down.
A/N: First EXO fic! Well it was inevitable that I'd do this considering that I've been reading waaaaay too many exo fics recently. Btw, this fic is (read: very very extremely) loosely based on the taiwanese movie The Apple Of My Eye (那些年，我们一起追的女孩). It's a really good movie (I watched it in theatres not once but twice) and it's adapted from a book of the same name! Highly recommended to watch the movie! And also, first exo fic here (and new to fic writing in general) so please go easy on me. Pretty please with a cherry on top.
將頭髮書城大人模樣，穿上一身帥氣西裝
等會兒遇見你一定比想像美
(I'm) wearing a handsome suit with perfectly combed hair
The real you will definitely look better than the you in my imagination
Looking in the mirror, Sehun gives his navy blue tie one last tug before turning away. Upon turning around, he sees Jongin casually leaning against the door frame, looking as heartbreakingly devastating as he had appeared on the first day in high school. Jongin looked up and gave a saccharine sweet smile to the younger, though he could not keep the irritation out of his face.
"About time. Let's go, we're going to be late! You don't want to keep the groom waiting, do you?"
Inwardly, Sehun smiles to himself. Some things never change, he thinks.
我們終於來到了這一天
This day has finally arrived
"Hey man, congratulations!" Jongin spots the aforementioned groom in the make-up room. Sehun's face is perfectly schooled into an expression of disinterest, but his eyes show a flash of panic which, thankfully, Jongin does not notice.
"C'mon, we need to get to him," The last few words are choked up as Jongin grabs Sehun by the scuff of his collar. Sehun feels a tiny bit wounded, does Jongin think he's dragging a dog? The older must have been spending too much time in solitude, with only Jjanggu for company.
He spares no mercy once Jongin releases him.
"How. Could. You. Drag. Me. Away." Sehun says, thwacking Jongin on his head in between each word. "You know today's an important day, I swear to god if you've mangled my suit...." Sehun trails off as he examines his (perfectly ironed) suit for creases, ignoring the wounded look Jongin shoots at him.
"When will you guys grow up," the groom's eyes though, are alight with mirth due to the scene he had just witnessed.
"Lu.. Luhan!"
Sehun takes in the beauty of the groom who is standing before him. Luhan had always been beautiful, more so than the other girls in their high school, but today, he was more than beautiful. His cherubic face had long been gone, replaced with a more mature look. His features, however, were as defining as ever.
Sehun gave a wistful sigh.
好想再回到那些年的時光
I'd wish to go back to the past
The first day Sehun met Luhan was during their freshman orientation. Sehun had been dragging a half-asleep Jongin to school.
"It's the first day of school! Do you want to make a bad impression on the teachers?" Sehun had squawked indignantly. His words went unheard by Jongin, who merely rubbed his eyes and turned over in his bed. Sehun, already dressed in his pristine uniform, reluctantly sat down and began the arduous task of rousing Kim Jongin at 7am in the morning.
This was how their first day of school had started.
Sehun remembered his eyes landing on two unoccupied seats at the back of the gymnasium, and sneakily (well, as sneaky as one could get with one person dragging another) made his way there.
He plopped down on the seat and threw an annoyed glance at the still sleeping Jongin. Deciding not to care about his comatose friend, he turned his attention to the speaker in front who was droning on about school rules.
"Aish, who cares man." A soft voice on his left broke his concentration, albeit a sketchy one. "Get over it already."
Sehun smirked at the words he heard. Turning to look at the owner of the voice, he saw an angelic looking boy with flawless skin looking annoyed with the speaker.
"Hey boy, what are you looking at?" The other boy seemed to resent Sehun's invasion of his privacy and glared at him. If looks could kill, Sehun would have been buried in the grave. Wow, such a nice face but the personality of the devil, Sehun thought. Not wanting to stir up anything though, he merely shrugged and turned his attention back to the stage.
And thus began his high school life.
回到教室座位前後 故意討你溫柔的罵
Going back to our classroom, where I'd purposely get scolded by you.
His unspoken enmity with the boy with the angelic face ended just after two days. It had nothing to do with the fact that they were in the same class. The school was not a big one and he had figured that he could live with it. No, it was something that went deeper. For on the third day, Luhan had careened into his life unexpectedly.
To: Sehunnie <3
Yo bro I made a new friend in detention ain't you proud of me
To: Jongin the idiot
I only hope the poor soul didn't get tainted by you.
To: Sehunnie <3
What do you mean tainted???! I am deeply ashamed rn
To: Jongin the idiot
Fine. So, does the poor soul have a name?
To: Sehunnie <3
He's called luhan and really really really nice. i kinda invited him to join us for lunch becos he said he doesnt know anyone here :-(
To: Jongin the idiot
Fine, I'll see him tomorrow then. I hope I won't be too late to save his soul.
To: Sehunnie <3
yay! see you tomorrow then sehunnie <3
Sehun doesn't give it much thought. It's Jongin, afterall, and that guy could pick up friends like a friend magnet. He just hoped that Jongin wouldn't scare him off. Putting the thought aside, he looked at the books arranged neatly on his study desk. Repressing the tiniest of sighs, he flips open Mathematics (Year 1).
It isn't until lunch the next day that he remembers Jongin's words. He turns to his left and pokes the boy, who awakes with a start, leaving a dime-sized patch of drool on his unopened textbook.
Jongin cranes his head around the classroom, as if trying to spot someone. Just as suddenly as he had got up, he waves frantically to someone behind.
"Hi, nice to meet you, my name is Luhan." Sehun hears a voice emanating from behind to take a look. Lo and behold, of course it would be that guy with the angelic face. Composing his features into a smile, he introduces himself as Sehun, Jongin's childhood friend (and by extension, best friend) from when they were in kindergarten.
It isn't long till Sehun is enamoured by Luhan. In fact, it only takes 24 minutes, not even halfway through the lunch break. The exact moment would be when Jongin leaves them to chat up some girl whom he swore was looking at him, and Luhan gives him a smile of solidarity. That is all it takes for Sehun to fall into the depths of Luhan's gummy smile, previous enmity forgotten (although it might appear that Luhan did not even remember their previous encounter, so there was that). Jongin comes back to find Sehun and Luhan sitting at a secluded corner of the cafeteria, laughing as if sharing an inside joke.
To his dismay, he soon finds out that Luhan, like Jongin, is a delinquent. Oh no, they don't play truant (not often, anyway) or set fires. But they do leave their work undone, neglect to tuck their uniform in, and sleep in class. Sehun soon tires of poking Luhan awake with his pen, he doesn't even bother with Jongin anymore as the latter had already grown impervious to it. It's okay though, the way Luhan's eyes light up when Sehun does something for him, how Luhan had changed places with another student to sit in front of Sehun (you could help me with my homework, is Luhan's reasoning) was worth everything in the world.
我喜歡你，你早就知道了啊？
You've known for a long time that I like you, haven't you?
Six months into high school, Sehun finds himself surrounded by three more new people. There was Luhan and Jongin, of course. But there had been more and more new additions to their lunch table recently. Kris, a basketball consummate who had made friends with Luhan when they played soccer together. Chanyeol, a hyperactive kid who had kept Jongin out of detention one day. Baekhyun, a studious kid with whom Sehun found a kindred spirit in.
They weren't a popular group by any means. Just a bunch of freshmen in school, like any other groups of freshmen. It could not denied, however, that Luhan's looks garnered quite a lot of attention. Sehun found out exactly how much attention, albeit the hard way.
My dear Sehunnie, has anyone told you that you look really gorgeous? Oh and you're so smart too! And kind hearted at that. Having said that, you would definitely help me won't you! I need to stay in class to meet Mr Blair so won't you be a dear and help me get my books needed for the next lesson. Here's my locker keys! Signing off, the uber cute Luhan.
Sehun stared at the note that had appeared on his desk, with a key taped to it, Looking suspiciously in front, he could not detect any movement coming from the sleeping boy. He scoffed inwardly, why did Luhan need books when he would just sleep in class anyway. Nonetheless, when lunch break came, Sehun being Sehun, told Jongin to book a seat for him at the cafeteria and went in search of Luhan's locker.
Looking at the locker tag which read 루한, he saw some pink papers peeking out from the floor of the locker. He opened it to find it filled with envelopes, mostly of the pink and frilly variety. Seriously? was his first thought. He concentrated on digging out the required books from below the envelopes and shut the locker door with a bang. Wow, I did not know that, was his second thought.
He placed the books on Luhan's table, attaching a small note that read:
Here you go, your majesty. And w.o.w. there were so many letters in your locker, you need to clear it man.
Seriously? I just cleared it the day before yesterday tho. Ugh are they still doing it? I totally told them to stop. Thanks anyway bro.
You totally would not. Don't even try to pretend you don't love the attention huh.
Of course I do not enjoy the attention! What do you think I am, some kind of attention whore?
Sehun smiled at the note in front of him. The mysterious feeling that had been plaguing him disappeared, replaced with a warmth in his heart. Poking Luhan, who had once again collapsed on the table after deciding that the note exchange was over, he turned to page 117 and tuned in to the lesson. After all, he had a valedictorian position to maintain.
Unbeknown to him, the boy seated in front of him was hiding a smile himself.
曾經想征服全世界，到最後才發現
這世界點點滴滴全部都是你
I once wanted to conquer the world; only at the end did I realise that you were what made up (my) world.
Sehun was in a world filled with angels of all shapes and sizes. White angels, black angels, angels with humongous green wings spreading out from behind them, great angels with a white beard trailing down past their waists. One with black wings enveloping its body, tendrils of vines curled around it. It was its face, however, that caught Sehun's attention. It stood out amongst the others, with darkness lurking beneath an innocent facade. Its cherubic face was lovely, reminding Sehun of someone, though he could not remember who.
He suddenly felt someone touching his head. Looking up, he saw nothing but snowflakes under a great expanse of nothingness. Feeling a nudge directed at his hands, he looked yet again to see nothing.
"Sehun ah, Sehun wake up!" Luhan nudged Sehun's hand ferociously, a small pout forming on his face.
Sehun got up groggily.
"Wha.. what?"
"What happened, you fell asleep during History, that's what happened," Luhan turned away with a small pout, evidently angry at Sehun for failing to wake up when the older had first roused him.
Sehun gave a start, and looked towards the front of the classroom. The teacher's desk was empty, with a clock that read 2.15PM.
Welcome to senior year, he thought wryly. The pressure must have really gotten to him, if he was now sleeping in classes. This was not a normal occurrence, but it was fast becoming so. But there was no choice, Sehun thought to himself. He was now the prime candidate for valedictorian and he wanted, no, needed, to keep it.
Conquer it and the world shall lie at your feet.
"Sehun?" Luhan's voice shook the younger away from his thoughts. The older looked wounded that Sehun had not tried to pacify him as he usually would. Sehun gave a small smile to the boy that had become his best friend (tied with Jongin anyway), which did not fool anyone. He was tired, and he knew it showed. However, he shook his head gently to show that nothing was wrong, and turned around to keep his books.
Midway through, he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"You should really take care of yourself, Sehun ah," Luhan's voice had a concerned tone. "Don't overwork yourself, ok?" He caressed Sehun's cheek before
remembering that it was inappropriate, and snatched his hand away.
The warm feeling bloomed in Sehun's chest again, as he looked up and smiled, truly smiled, at the angelic face.
Luhan, Luhan, Luhan.
It'd always been him, right?
如果他對我告白的話，我會很高興的。
His confession would make me very happy.
"We have gone through the most tremulous parts of our youth together. We've laughed? we've cried, some more than others. Let us now move forward together, and create new memories. For no matter what, this school will never forget you." Sehun ended his valedictorian speech and bowed with a flourish. Averting his tearful eyes from the stage, he hurried down it and found Luhan and Jongin waiting for him.
"My man, that was awesome," Jongin slung his arm over Sehun and gave him a grin. "Let us now go forth... and party!" Jongin dragged Sehun into the crowd, with Luhan trailing behind them.
It was 2 hours before he found Luhan in a deserted stairwell, a can of beer in his hands.
Sehun gingerly sat down beside Luhan, cringing inwardly at the dust particles that were attached to his suit now, well at least the part of the suit covering his ass.
"Technically booze is not allowed in school, you know," Sehun started, trying to ease the atmosphere. "We might have graduated but this is still-" Sehun's words were cut short when Luhan turned his head to look at him. His eyes were hazy and filled with happiness, and one last undecipherable emotion.
Longing, a part of Sehun's mind told him, even as he tried to ignore the small voice in his head. Before he could process what was happening, Luhan had closed the distance between their faces and his lips now touched Sehun's. As if acting on autopilot, Sehun's mind shut down, leaving Sehun with no thoughts at all.
Luhan's lips were warm and pliant. After a split moment of hesitation, he tilted his head to get better access to Luhan's mouth. Putting his arms around the older, he continued his exploration and felt a heady tinge of arousal in the depths of his body. Luhan let out a small moan which Sehun unabashedly responded eagerly to, almost swallowing the sound whole in his own throat.
"I'm going back to Beijing." This was Luhan's first words after they broke apart, as his face rested against Sehun's chest.
Sehun made no indication that he had heard and continued trailing his fingers down the older's chest.
"I didn't want to go, but my mum insisted on me attending Peking University." Luhan continued, undeterred by the lack of response.
Sehun made a small, indistinguishable noise as he pulled Luhan up and enveloped him in his warmth. Unbeknown to him, hot tears were currently making their way down his face, drenching Luhan's suit as they cascaded.
They had one month left.
青春就像一場大雨，即使感冒了，也盼望再回頭淋他一次。
Our youth is akin to rain. Even though you catch a cold from it, you will want to go back to those times where you stood under the pouring rain.
D-29
Holding a bouquet of flowers, Sehun stood awkwardly at the cinema entrance, ignoring the odd looks shot at him by curious strangers. He cannot, for the life of him, remember the movie they caught that day. What he does remember, is the way Luhan's eyes lighted up when he saw the carnations, playfully chiding Sehun for buying such ominous flowers. Despite that, Luhan had happily held on to them for the rest of the day. What Sehun remembers are the lingering fragrance of the flowers.
D-18
Sehun lounged awkwardly on the couch in his living room. When the doorbell began ringing, he almost tripped over his Xbox in his haste to open the door. It seems they did nothing today, but Sehun will remember Luhan's shy smile as he stepped into the younger's house, and the touches that Luhan dispensed freely around him. He remembers Luhan almost burning the kitchen down as he insisted on cooking, the way Luhan's body lay beside him on his bed, shoulders touching as they talked about everything and nothing at the same time.
D-5
Jongin had complained about Sehun abandoning him, so today they were at the newly built sports complex in their neighbourhood. Sehun remembers seeing Luhan and Kris squabbling over what to play, while Chanyeol and Baekhyun had gone off to rent bicycles. He remembers Jongin turning to him and asking casually, "So, how long has this been going on?" and he does not even bother to feign ignorance, causing him to spill everything to Jongin. He remembers Luhan pouting as Chanyeol and Kris cornered him during a game of basketball, because 'it's unfair to put the tall guys together'.
D-1
They meet at a secluded park at 2AM, and spend hours holding on to each other, until the sun rises.
Only 2 hours later, they meet again at the airport, along with Jongin, Kris, Chanyeol and Baekhyun. Sehun does not let his tears spill, even as Luhan gives him a customary hug, and whispers 'I love you' into his ear. He appears unruffled as he whispers it back to Luhan before letting go. And then, Luhan is out of their sight, disappearing around a corner under a sign 'Immigration'.
好想告訴你，告訴你我沒有忘記
How much I wish to tell you that I haven't forgotten.
The first email comes a week later.
To: osehun@gmail.com
Sehunnie, how are you? I've been busy unpacking since I just moved into my dorm. I cannot believe how much Beijing has changed considering it's only been a few years! My roommate is called Yixing and he seems really nice, a little quiet though. I miss you so much, did you miss me? I really wish I was back in Korea with you..
To: luludabest@gmail.com
Luhan, it's been boring around here. Jongin got himself a girlfriend, can you believe it? You'll never guess who it is! Do you remember the girl he tried to chat up when we first met? Yeah, that girl. I know, right! Anyway, I've just been playing basketball with Kris recently and I just sent in my application to Seoul National University. Keeping my fingers crossed for now. You know I'll never stop missing you.
The correspondence does not stop, but drifts into more trivial, everyday stuff.
To: osehun@gmail.com
I'm in Taiwan for an exchange programme now! Bubble tea, sehun! Aren't you jealous?
Sehun looks at the date. 21st September. Figuring that he can reply later, he turns on the television.
".... this earthquake has devastated Taiwan, with collapsed buildings and major cracks in the floor. The current death toll is 51, and may continue rising as rescue groups are sent out. Their power, however, is heavily constrained by the strong aftershocks."
Sehun stares at the television, instinctively reaching for his phone. Luhan had given him his new number in China before, but he had never felt a need to use it, mainly due to the high overseas call charge.
"Hello? Wait a minute please. Alright I'm out now, who is this?"
"Luhan,"
"Sehun? Are you Sehun?"
"I mean, yeah. I saw the news on the television and..."
"Oh I'm alright, the dorms are pretty sturdy. Nothing's much destroyed, just in a mess,"
"That's good, I mean, take care!"
He pretty much forgets to reply Luhan, and their correspondence meets a tragic, neglected end.
A card arrives at his doorstep 5 years later.
That very day, he bumps into Kris at a restaurant. 5 years later, no less.
"Hey Sehun!" Kris has a surprised look on his face as he steps back and gives Sehun an once-over. "Looking good, bro."
"Kris?" Sehun looks at the guy that had been one of his high school chums.
"Are you going to Luhan's wedding, then?" Kris asks, after a small conversation consisting of their current lives.
"Sure! I mean, he is holding it in Seoul after all, be a pity to miss good food," Sehun jokes.
"See you there, then," Kris nods briskly. "Give my love to Soojung, eh," Kris winks and gestures to Sehun's table, where a woman is seated, waiting patiently for their conversation to end.
Sehun walks back to the table, giving the woman a peck on her lips. She does not ask about the conversation, just smiles. Sehun smiles back, feeling the same frisson of warmth he had felt back then.
And that's enough for Sehun.
也許在另外一個平行時空裡，我們是在一起的。
The other us in a parallel dimension, maybe they're together.
Jongin envelopes the groom into a hug, while Sehun looks on, a fond smile appearing on his face. He stretches out his hand formally for Luhan to shake, but Luhan is having none of that, pushing away his hand to bring Sehun in for a hug. Thank you, he hears Luhan whisper.
It is time for the ceremony, where Sehun finds Luhan hugging his bride encouragingly, before offering her his hand to walk down to the altar. Sehun smiles to see how his little Luhan has grown, from a rebellious teenager on the first day of high school to a successful entrepreneur with a beautiful bride. And in that moment, he truly feels happy for Luhan.
That night, long after everyone has left, Sehun thinks of first loves, innocence under the dim moonlight, and Luhan.
Always Luhan.
But the day's passed, and some things can no longer be.
He returns from the past.
Takes out his phone and scrolls to a contact.
Soojunggie ❤
"How was the wedding, dear? Are you coming back already, I miss you so!"
"I'll be back soon. And Soojung-ah,"
"Mm?"
"I love you."
"I love you too dear, see you soon!"
Author: enrasin
Genre: friendship, romance
Rating: PG-13
Length: 3082 words
Pairing: HunHan
Summary: Sehun sees Luhan smile and his world turns upside down.
A/N: First EXO fic! Well it was inevitable that I'd do this considering that I've been reading waaaaay too many exo fics recently. Btw, this fic is (read: very very extremely) loosely based on the taiwanese movie The Apple Of My Eye (那些年，我们一起追的女孩). It's a really good movie (I watched it in theatres not once but twice) and it's adapted from a book of the same name! Highly recommended to watch the movie! And also, first exo fic here (and new to fic writing in general) so please go easy on me. Pretty please with a cherry on top.
將頭髮書城大人模樣，穿上一身帥氣西裝
等會兒遇見你一定比想像美
(I'm) wearing a handsome suit with perfectly combed hair
The real you will definitely look better than the you in my imagination
Looking in the mirror, Sehun gives his navy blue tie one last tug before turning away. Upon turning around, he sees Jongin casually leaning against the door frame, looking as heartbreakingly devastating as he had appeared on the first day in high school. Jongin looked up and gave a saccharine sweet smile to the younger, though he could not keep the irritation out of his face.
"About time. Let's go, we're going to be late! You don't want to keep the groom waiting, do you?"
Inwardly, Sehun smiles to himself. Some things never change, he thinks.
我們終於來到了這一天
This day has finally arrived
"Hey man, congratulations!" Jongin spots the aforementioned groom in the make-up room. Sehun's face is perfectly schooled into an expression of disinterest, but his eyes show a flash of panic which, thankfully, Jongin does not notice.
"C'mon, we need to get to him," The last few words are choked up as Jongin grabs Sehun by the scuff of his collar. Sehun feels a tiny bit wounded, does Jongin think he's dragging a dog? The older must have been spending too much time in solitude, with only Jjanggu for company.
He spares no mercy once Jongin releases him.
"How. Could. You. Drag. Me. Away." Sehun says, thwacking Jongin on his head in between each word. "You know today's an important day, I swear to god if you've mangled my suit...." Sehun trails off as he examines his (perfectly ironed) suit for creases, ignoring the wounded look Jongin shoots at him.
"When will you guys grow up," the groom's eyes though, are alight with mirth due to the scene he had just witnessed.
"Lu.. Luhan!"
Sehun takes in the beauty of the groom who is standing before him. Luhan had always been beautiful, more so than the other girls in their high school, but today, he was more than beautiful. His cherubic face had long been gone, replaced with a more mature look. His features, however, were as defining as ever.
Sehun gave a wistful sigh.
好想再回到那些年的時光
I'd wish to go back to the past
The first day Sehun met Luhan was during their freshman orientation. Sehun had been dragging a half-asleep Jongin to school.
"It's the first day of school! Do you want to make a bad impression on the teachers?" Sehun had squawked indignantly. His words went unheard by Jongin, who merely rubbed his eyes and turned over in his bed. Sehun, already dressed in his pristine uniform, reluctantly sat down and began the arduous task of rousing Kim Jongin at 7am in the morning.
This was how their first day of school had started.
Sehun remembered his eyes landing on two unoccupied seats at the back of the gymnasium, and sneakily (well, as sneaky as one could get with one person dragging another) made his way there.
He plopped down on the seat and threw an annoyed glance at the still sleeping Jongin. Deciding not to care about his comatose friend, he turned his attention to the speaker in front who was droning on about school rules.
"Aish, who cares man." A soft voice on his left broke his concentration, albeit a sketchy one. "Get over it already."
Sehun smirked at the words he heard. Turning to look at the owner of the voice, he saw an angelic looking boy with flawless skin looking annoyed with the speaker.
"Hey boy, what are you looking at?" The other boy seemed to resent Sehun's invasion of his privacy and glared at him. If looks could kill, Sehun would have been buried in the grave. Wow, such a nice face but the personality of the devil, Sehun thought. Not wanting to stir up anything though, he merely shrugged and turned his attention back to the stage.
And thus began his high school life.
回到教室座位前後 故意討你溫柔的罵
Going back to our classroom, where I'd purposely get scolded by you.
His unspoken enmity with the boy with the angelic face ended just after two days. It had nothing to do with the fact that they were in the same class. The school was not a big one and he had figured that he could live with it. No, it was something that went deeper. For on the third day, Luhan had careened into his life unexpectedly.
To: Sehunnie <3
Yo bro I made a new friend in detention ain't you proud of me
To: Jongin the idiot
I only hope the poor soul didn't get tainted by you.
To: Sehunnie <3
What do you mean tainted???! I am deeply ashamed rn
To: Jongin the idiot
Fine. So, does the poor soul have a name?
To: Sehunnie <3
He's called luhan and really really really nice. i kinda invited him to join us for lunch becos he said he doesnt know anyone here :-(
To: Jongin the idiot
Fine, I'll see him tomorrow then. I hope I won't be too late to save his soul.
To: Sehunnie <3
yay! see you tomorrow then sehunnie <3
Sehun doesn't give it much thought. It's Jongin, afterall, and that guy could pick up friends like a friend magnet. He just hoped that Jongin wouldn't scare him off. Putting the thought aside, he looked at the books arranged neatly on his study desk. Repressing the tiniest of sighs, he flips open Mathematics (Year 1).
It isn't until lunch the next day that he remembers Jongin's words. He turns to his left and pokes the boy, who awakes with a start, leaving a dime-sized patch of drool on his unopened textbook.
Jongin cranes his head around the classroom, as if trying to spot someone. Just as suddenly as he had got up, he waves frantically to someone behind.
"Hi, nice to meet you, my name is Luhan." Sehun hears a voice emanating from behind to take a look. Lo and behold, of course it would be that guy with the angelic face. Composing his features into a smile, he introduces himself as Sehun, Jongin's childhood friend (and by extension, best friend) from when they were in kindergarten.
It isn't long till Sehun is enamoured by Luhan. In fact, it only takes 24 minutes, not even halfway through the lunch break. The exact moment would be when Jongin leaves them to chat up some girl whom he swore was looking at him, and Luhan gives him a smile of solidarity. That is all it takes for Sehun to fall into the depths of Luhan's gummy smile, previous enmity forgotten (although it might appear that Luhan did not even remember their previous encounter, so there was that). Jongin comes back to find Sehun and Luhan sitting at a secluded corner of the cafeteria, laughing as if sharing an inside joke.
To his dismay, he soon finds out that Luhan, like Jongin, is a delinquent. Oh no, they don't play truant (not often, anyway) or set fires. But they do leave their work undone, neglect to tuck their uniform in, and sleep in class. Sehun soon tires of poking Luhan awake with his pen, he doesn't even bother with Jongin anymore as the latter had already grown impervious to it. It's okay though, the way Luhan's eyes light up when Sehun does something for him, how Luhan had changed places with another student to sit in front of Sehun (you could help me with my homework, is Luhan's reasoning) was worth everything in the world.
我喜歡你，你早就知道了啊？
You've known for a long time that I like you, haven't you?
Six months into high school, Sehun finds himself surrounded by three more new people. There was Luhan and Jongin, of course. But there had been more and more new additions to their lunch table recently. Kris, a basketball consummate who had made friends with Luhan when they played soccer together. Chanyeol, a hyperactive kid who had kept Jongin out of detention one day. Baekhyun, a studious kid with whom Sehun found a kindred spirit in.
They weren't a popular group by any means. Just a bunch of freshmen in school, like any other groups of freshmen. It could not denied, however, that Luhan's looks garnered quite a lot of attention. Sehun found out exactly how much attention, albeit the hard way.
My dear Sehunnie, has anyone told you that you look really gorgeous? Oh and you're so smart too! And kind hearted at that. Having said that, you would definitely help me won't you! I need to stay in class to meet Mr Blair so won't you be a dear and help me get my books needed for the next lesson. Here's my locker keys! Signing off, the uber cute Luhan.
Sehun stared at the note that had appeared on his desk, with a key taped to it, Looking suspiciously in front, he could not detect any movement coming from the sleeping boy. He scoffed inwardly, why did Luhan need books when he would just sleep in class anyway. Nonetheless, when lunch break came, Sehun being Sehun, told Jongin to book a seat for him at the cafeteria and went in search of Luhan's locker.
Looking at the locker tag which read 루한, he saw some pink papers peeking out from the floor of the locker. He opened it to find it filled with envelopes, mostly of the pink and frilly variety. Seriously? was his first thought. He concentrated on digging out the required books from below the envelopes and shut the locker door with a bang. Wow, I did not know that, was his second thought.
He placed the books on Luhan's table, attaching a small note that read:
Here you go, your majesty. And w.o.w. there were so many letters in your locker, you need to clear it man.
Seriously? I just cleared it the day before yesterday tho. Ugh are they still doing it? I totally told them to stop. Thanks anyway bro.
You totally would not. Don't even try to pretend you don't love the attention huh.
Of course I do not enjoy the attention! What do you think I am, some kind of attention whore?
Sehun smiled at the note in front of him. The mysterious feeling that had been plaguing him disappeared, replaced with a warmth in his heart. Poking Luhan, who had once again collapsed on the table after deciding that the note exchange was over, he turned to page 117 and tuned in to the lesson. After all, he had a valedictorian position to maintain.
Unbeknown to him, the boy seated in front of him was hiding a smile himself.
曾經想征服全世界，到最後才發現
這世界點點滴滴全部都是你
I once wanted to conquer the world; only at the end did I realise that you were what made up (my) world.
Sehun was in a world filled with angels of all shapes and sizes. White angels, black angels, angels with humongous green wings spreading out from behind them, great angels with a white beard trailing down past their waists. One with black wings enveloping its body, tendrils of vines curled around it. It was its face, however, that caught Sehun's attention. It stood out amongst the others, with darkness lurking beneath an innocent facade. Its cherubic face was lovely, reminding Sehun of someone, though he could not remember who.
He suddenly felt someone touching his head. Looking up, he saw nothing but snowflakes under a great expanse of nothingness. Feeling a nudge directed at his hands, he looked yet again to see nothing.
"Sehun ah, Sehun wake up!" Luhan nudged Sehun's hand ferociously, a small pout forming on his face.
Sehun got up groggily.
"Wha.. what?"
"What happened, you fell asleep during History, that's what happened," Luhan turned away with a small pout, evidently angry at Sehun for failing to wake up when the older had first roused him.
Sehun gave a start, and looked towards the front of the classroom. The teacher's desk was empty, with a clock that read 2.15PM.
Welcome to senior year, he thought wryly. The pressure must have really gotten to him, if he was now sleeping in classes. This was not a normal occurrence, but it was fast becoming so. But there was no choice, Sehun thought to himself. He was now the prime candidate for valedictorian and he wanted, no, needed, to keep it.
Conquer it and the world shall lie at your feet.
"Sehun?" Luhan's voice shook the younger away from his thoughts. The older looked wounded that Sehun had not tried to pacify him as he usually would. Sehun gave a small smile to the boy that had become his best friend (tied with Jongin anyway), which did not fool anyone. He was tired, and he knew it showed. However, he shook his head gently to show that nothing was wrong, and turned around to keep his books.
Midway through, he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"You should really take care of yourself, Sehun ah," Luhan's voice had a concerned tone. "Don't overwork yourself, ok?" He caressed Sehun's cheek before
remembering that it was inappropriate, and snatched his hand away.
The warm feeling bloomed in Sehun's chest again, as he looked up and smiled, truly smiled, at the angelic face.
Luhan, Luhan, Luhan.
It'd always been him, right?
如果他對我告白的話，我會很高興的。
His confession would make me very happy.
"We have gone through the most tremulous parts of our youth together. We've laughed? we've cried, some more than others. Let us now move forward together, and create new memories. For no matter what, this school will never forget you." Sehun ended his valedictorian speech and bowed with a flourish. Averting his tearful eyes from the stage, he hurried down it and found Luhan and Jongin waiting for him.
"My man, that was awesome," Jongin slung his arm over Sehun and gave him a grin. "Let us now go forth... and party!" Jongin dragged Sehun into the crowd, with Luhan trailing behind them.
It was 2 hours before he found Luhan in a deserted stairwell, a can of beer in his hands.
Sehun gingerly sat down beside Luhan, cringing inwardly at the dust particles that were attached to his suit now, well at least the part of the suit covering his ass.
"Technically booze is not allowed in school, you know," Sehun started, trying to ease the atmosphere. "We might have graduated but this is still-" Sehun's words were cut short when Luhan turned his head to look at him. His eyes were hazy and filled with happiness, and one last undecipherable emotion.
Longing, a part of Sehun's mind told him, even as he tried to ignore the small voice in his head. Before he could process what was happening, Luhan had closed the distance between their faces and his lips now touched Sehun's. As if acting on autopilot, Sehun's mind shut down, leaving Sehun with no thoughts at all.
Luhan's lips were warm and pliant. After a split moment of hesitation, he tilted his head to get better access to Luhan's mouth. Putting his arms around the older, he continued his exploration and felt a heady tinge of arousal in the depths of his body. Luhan let out a small moan which Sehun unabashedly responded eagerly to, almost swallowing the sound whole in his own throat.
"I'm going back to Beijing." This was Luhan's first words after they broke apart, as his face rested against Sehun's chest.
Sehun made no indication that he had heard and continued trailing his fingers down the older's chest.
"I didn't want to go, but my mum insisted on me attending Peking University." Luhan continued, undeterred by the lack of response.
Sehun made a small, indistinguishable noise as he pulled Luhan up and enveloped him in his warmth. Unbeknown to him, hot tears were currently making their way down his face, drenching Luhan's suit as they cascaded.
They had one month left.
青春就像一場大雨，即使感冒了，也盼望再回頭淋他一次。
Our youth is akin to rain. Even though you catch a cold from it, you will want to go back to those times where you stood under the pouring rain.
D-29
Holding a bouquet of flowers, Sehun stood awkwardly at the cinema entrance, ignoring the odd looks shot at him by curious strangers. He cannot, for the life of him, remember the movie they caught that day. What he does remember, is the way Luhan's eyes lighted up when he saw the carnations, playfully chiding Sehun for buying such ominous flowers. Despite that, Luhan had happily held on to them for the rest of the day. What Sehun remembers are the lingering fragrance of the flowers.
D-18
Sehun lounged awkwardly on the couch in his living room. When the doorbell began ringing, he almost tripped over his Xbox in his haste to open the door. It seems they did nothing today, but Sehun will remember Luhan's shy smile as he stepped into the younger's house, and the touches that Luhan dispensed freely around him. He remembers Luhan almost burning the kitchen down as he insisted on cooking, the way Luhan's body lay beside him on his bed, shoulders touching as they talked about everything and nothing at the same time.
D-5
Jongin had complained about Sehun abandoning him, so today they were at the newly built sports complex in their neighbourhood. Sehun remembers seeing Luhan and Kris squabbling over what to play, while Chanyeol and Baekhyun had gone off to rent bicycles. He remembers Jongin turning to him and asking casually, "So, how long has this been going on?" and he does not even bother to feign ignorance, causing him to spill everything to Jongin. He remembers Luhan pouting as Chanyeol and Kris cornered him during a game of basketball, because 'it's unfair to put the tall guys together'.
D-1
They meet at a secluded park at 2AM, and spend hours holding on to each other, until the sun rises.
Only 2 hours later, they meet again at the airport, along with Jongin, Kris, Chanyeol and Baekhyun. Sehun does not let his tears spill, even as Luhan gives him a customary hug, and whispers 'I love you' into his ear. He appears unruffled as he whispers it back to Luhan before letting go. And then, Luhan is out of their sight, disappearing around a corner under a sign 'Immigration'.
好想告訴你，告訴你我沒有忘記
How much I wish to tell you that I haven't forgotten.
The first email comes a week later.
To: osehun@gmail.com
Sehunnie, how are you? I've been busy unpacking since I just moved into my dorm. I cannot believe how much Beijing has changed considering it's only been a few years! My roommate is called Yixing and he seems really nice, a little quiet though. I miss you so much, did you miss me? I really wish I was back in Korea with you..
To: luludabest@gmail.com
Luhan, it's been boring around here. Jongin got himself a girlfriend, can you believe it? You'll never guess who it is! Do you remember the girl he tried to chat up when we first met? Yeah, that girl. I know, right! Anyway, I've just been playing basketball with Kris recently and I just sent in my application to Seoul National University. Keeping my fingers crossed for now. You know I'll never stop missing you.
The correspondence does not stop, but drifts into more trivial, everyday stuff.
To: osehun@gmail.com
I'm in Taiwan for an exchange programme now! Bubble tea, sehun! Aren't you jealous?
Sehun looks at the date. 21st September. Figuring that he can reply later, he turns on the television.
".... this earthquake has devastated Taiwan, with collapsed buildings and major cracks in the floor. The current death toll is 51, and may continue rising as rescue groups are sent out. Their power, however, is heavily constrained by the strong aftershocks."
Sehun stares at the television, instinctively reaching for his phone. Luhan had given him his new number in China before, but he had never felt a need to use it, mainly due to the high overseas call charge.
"Hello? Wait a minute please. Alright I'm out now, who is this?"
"Luhan,"
"Sehun? Are you Sehun?"
"I mean, yeah. I saw the news on the television and..."
"Oh I'm alright, the dorms are pretty sturdy. Nothing's much destroyed, just in a mess,"
"That's good, I mean, take care!"
He pretty much forgets to reply Luhan, and their correspondence meets a tragic, neglected end.
A card arrives at his doorstep 5 years later.
That very day, he bumps into Kris at a restaurant. 5 years later, no less.
"Hey Sehun!" Kris has a surprised look on his face as he steps back and gives Sehun an once-over. "Looking good, bro."
"Kris?" Sehun looks at the guy that had been one of his high school chums.
"Are you going to Luhan's wedding, then?" Kris asks, after a small conversation consisting of their current lives.
"Sure! I mean, he is holding it in Seoul after all, be a pity to miss good food," Sehun jokes.
"See you there, then," Kris nods briskly. "Give my love to Soojung, eh," Kris winks and gestures to Sehun's table, where a woman is seated, waiting patiently for their conversation to end.
Sehun walks back to the table, giving the woman a peck on her lips. She does not ask about the conversation, just smiles. Sehun smiles back, feeling the same frisson of warmth he had felt back then.
And that's enough for Sehun.
也許在另外一個平行時空裡，我們是在一起的。
The other us in a parallel dimension, maybe they're together.
Jongin envelopes the groom into a hug, while Sehun looks on, a fond smile appearing on his face. He stretches out his hand formally for Luhan to shake, but Luhan is having none of that, pushing away his hand to bring Sehun in for a hug. Thank you, he hears Luhan whisper.
It is time for the ceremony, where Sehun finds Luhan hugging his bride encouragingly, before offering her his hand to walk down to the altar. Sehun smiles to see how his little Luhan has grown, from a rebellious teenager on the first day of high school to a successful entrepreneur with a beautiful bride. And in that moment, he truly feels happy for Luhan.
That night, long after everyone has left, Sehun thinks of first loves, innocence under the dim moonlight, and Luhan.
Always Luhan.
But the day's passed, and some things can no longer be.
He returns from the past.
Takes out his phone and scrolls to a contact.
Soojunggie ❤
"How was the wedding, dear? Are you coming back already, I miss you so!"
"I'll be back soon. And Soojung-ah,"
"Mm?"
"I love you."
"I love you too dear, see you soon!"