BOOK 'EM DANNO
Click to viewLmfao. I'm the kind of person who sporadically watches CSI: Miami only because it came after Big Bang Theory on Mondays and David Caruso was great to laugh at. Criminal Minds too, but not that often.
Hawaii Five-O is really no different. It was like watching Mr. and Mrs. Smith all over again, and idgaf, Angelina Jolie is great and all, but fuck that movie. Just a power hour of Pitt and Jolie showing off, making out, then more showing off. But coming back to H50, one thing can nicely sum up this whole episode: rushed.
They were trying to cram so much into this first episode, that nothing was really touched on. I didn't feel any sort of connection or understanding of the characters, the actual crime/mystery/whatever was sloppily put together, and nothing felt really heartfelt. You mean to tell me that your dad DIES, you hear it by phone, and all you can do is backtalk your own state governor over minor details because you've got pride flowing out of your ears? That Danno has to put up with your shit, you guys get into a fight, then you knock him over, and he STILL COMES BACK TO YOU? Wtelf, DANNO, GET A GRIP, MAN. Or a girlfriend. Or something. Hang out with your daughter more often, get more custody. Why did you crawl back to him. Move over, House/Wilson, there's a new contender for gayest bromance of the century.
I do have to admit a soft spot for Danno. Poor sap is so defensive and pouty all the time that you just want to give him a root beer and take him to Disney World and ride Space Mountain and those spinning teacups.
And why would you punch a tourist, Kano for getting in your way on the waves, just what the hell. That's not being a tough cop, that's being the biggest jerk on the beach.
I'd say something about Chin Ho, but besides making frowny faces and grumping along, he didn't really do much.
And man, why did they have the bad guys all shot up dead and/or quivering in their boots. Last guy managed to pepper Steve's face with a few punches, but of course Steve had to valiantly save the day. THE END EVERYONE GO HOME.
Lmao it's 2:44 am. Hi guys, how's your Wednesday morning.