Fic: Accountability
Uh I accidentally wrote a tiny Avengers fic last night?
Title: Accountability
Genre/Pairing: Gen, humor
Rating: G
Word count: ~700
Warnings/Spoilers: MASSIVE MOVIE SPOILERS. READ ONLY AFTER SEEING THE MOVIE.
Summary: [Spoilery, click to see.]Fix-it fic. Coulson has a bone to pick with Fury.
Read it on AO3 or here under the cut.
~~~~~
No matter what anyone says, Fury is not hiding. He may have made Maria Hill do the debriefing, he may have sent a fruit basket instead of visiting, he may have told his assistant to say he's not here, but he is not hiding. Nick Fury does not hide.
So he absolutely does not flinch when Agent Coulson opens his door.
"Sir."
"Agent Coulson. Good to see you up and about."
"It's good to be that way, sir," Agent Coulson says blandly. Fury looks at him from the corner of his good eye. Coulson looks thin and pale and tired, his black suit hanging looser than normal. Not surprising, since the man has only been out of the hospital for two days. He also has that barely noticeable tightness in his jaw that means he is extremely pissed off.
"I was hoping I could talk to you, sir, about some of the decisions you made after my confrontation with Loki on the helicarrier."
Fury -- who in the small glittering stone he calls a heart knows that this whole charade was a shitty thing to do both to Agent Coulson and to the Avengers, who as of this moment still believe their friend died fighting Loki -- goes on the offensive.
"I know this wasn't the ideal situation, Agent, but you were right. They needed something to avenge. They weren't working as a team, we didn't have time for any trust-building assignments, and your death may have been the one thing that kept them together long enough to save the Earth. I am sorry about the subterfuge but it was necessary for --"
"I understand that, sir," Coulson interrupts, and Coulson never interrupts. "I'm talking about my cards."
"Your cards."
"They were vintage, sir. Nearly mint."
"I--"
"It took me years to collect them, sir. That's why they were in the protective case with the tamper-proof lock."
"Agent Coulson, at the time it was deemed expedient--"
"I wanted to let you know, with all due respect sir, that I expect SHIELD to replace them. In equal or better condition."
It is clearly not a request. Fury sighs. "You'll get your replacements."
"Near mint. Or better."
Fury fully expects to receive a detailed listing of each card, with annotations on the condition of its corners and the clarity of the printing. It honestly makes him a little uneasy that Coulson didn't bring that list with him today -- perhaps he hasn't recovered as much as the doctors had assured him.
"For reference." Coulson brandishes a folder and all is right with Fury's world.
Fury takes it and lays it carefully in his inbox. Coulson watches with approval. "It'll be done, you have my word on that, Agent Coulson. Now I expect to see you at work bright and early tomorrow to begin your next mission."
Coulson's expression doesn't change, but he's still obviously eager to return to work. "Sir?"
Fury clicks a button on his desk and an image of the Avengers on their last mission appears on the wall behind him. Iron Man is embedded upside-down in the wall of a building along with Cap's shield while Hawkeye runs frantically past, pursued by what can only be described as an alien beaver.
"These idiots have been on their own for two months while you recovered and quite frankly, I don't think the world can take any more. They don't need motivation, they need a goddamn zookeeper. You think you can handle the job?"
There's a tiny smile on Coulson's face, and it's the happiest Nick Fury has ever seen him. "Yes, sir. Absolutely."
"I'm glad to hear it, and I know the Avengers will be, too." Fury comes around his desk and claps him on the shoulder. "And after they're all done yelling at the two of us, you can get Cap to sign your new cards."
Title: Accountability
Genre/Pairing: Gen, humor
Rating: G
Word count: ~700
Warnings/Spoilers: MASSIVE MOVIE SPOILERS. READ ONLY AFTER SEEING THE MOVIE.
Summary: [Spoilery, click to see.]Fix-it fic. Coulson has a bone to pick with Fury.
Read it on AO3 or here under the cut.
~~~~~
No matter what anyone says, Fury is not hiding. He may have made Maria Hill do the debriefing, he may have sent a fruit basket instead of visiting, he may have told his assistant to say he's not here, but he is not hiding. Nick Fury does not hide.
So he absolutely does not flinch when Agent Coulson opens his door.
"Sir."
"Agent Coulson. Good to see you up and about."
"It's good to be that way, sir," Agent Coulson says blandly. Fury looks at him from the corner of his good eye. Coulson looks thin and pale and tired, his black suit hanging looser than normal. Not surprising, since the man has only been out of the hospital for two days. He also has that barely noticeable tightness in his jaw that means he is extremely pissed off.
"I was hoping I could talk to you, sir, about some of the decisions you made after my confrontation with Loki on the helicarrier."
Fury -- who in the small glittering stone he calls a heart knows that this whole charade was a shitty thing to do both to Agent Coulson and to the Avengers, who as of this moment still believe their friend died fighting Loki -- goes on the offensive.
"I know this wasn't the ideal situation, Agent, but you were right. They needed something to avenge. They weren't working as a team, we didn't have time for any trust-building assignments, and your death may have been the one thing that kept them together long enough to save the Earth. I am sorry about the subterfuge but it was necessary for --"
"I understand that, sir," Coulson interrupts, and Coulson never interrupts. "I'm talking about my cards."
"Your cards."
"They were vintage, sir. Nearly mint."
"I--"
"It took me years to collect them, sir. That's why they were in the protective case with the tamper-proof lock."
"Agent Coulson, at the time it was deemed expedient--"
"I wanted to let you know, with all due respect sir, that I expect SHIELD to replace them. In equal or better condition."
It is clearly not a request. Fury sighs. "You'll get your replacements."
"Near mint. Or better."
Fury fully expects to receive a detailed listing of each card, with annotations on the condition of its corners and the clarity of the printing. It honestly makes him a little uneasy that Coulson didn't bring that list with him today -- perhaps he hasn't recovered as much as the doctors had assured him.
"For reference." Coulson brandishes a folder and all is right with Fury's world.
Fury takes it and lays it carefully in his inbox. Coulson watches with approval. "It'll be done, you have my word on that, Agent Coulson. Now I expect to see you at work bright and early tomorrow to begin your next mission."
Coulson's expression doesn't change, but he's still obviously eager to return to work. "Sir?"
Fury clicks a button on his desk and an image of the Avengers on their last mission appears on the wall behind him. Iron Man is embedded upside-down in the wall of a building along with Cap's shield while Hawkeye runs frantically past, pursued by what can only be described as an alien beaver.
"These idiots have been on their own for two months while you recovered and quite frankly, I don't think the world can take any more. They don't need motivation, they need a goddamn zookeeper. You think you can handle the job?"
There's a tiny smile on Coulson's face, and it's the happiest Nick Fury has ever seen him. "Yes, sir. Absolutely."
"I'm glad to hear it, and I know the Avengers will be, too." Fury comes around his desk and claps him on the shoulder. "And after they're all done yelling at the two of us, you can get Cap to sign your new cards."