not even a man such as myself

kill me

nmu

THIS TRAIN NEARBY I DONT KNOW WHERE IT IS BUT REALLY GODDAMN CLOSE KEEPS BLOWING ITS FUCKING HORN AT NIGHT ( Read more... )

I really really hate people with talent. More than most things, I'd say. They're just so...gifted. I don't think that extends to anyone who would actually read this (I'm talking to YOU Eric) because as far as I know I don't have any really talented friends. Which isn't a slight against my friends, well I suppose it is a little but I'm talking about ( Read more... )

Everyone knows I've always done a little of the freelance bullshit on the side to pull in whatever cash I could. It beats actual work you know what I'm saying? But this time I landed something a little over my head and I'm pretty sure I am screwed. $375 for 1500 words?? They have EXPECTATIONS! I don't do well with expectations! This is it, I'm ( Read more... )

its so moist and wonderful that I dont even need milkk or any drink really

but its too heavy my stomach hurts now *barf*

So here I am in El Paso, hanging with my bro kaypee and quickly descending into insanity. That's not a joke either, I really am beginning to go completely mad. It's primarily a matter of my sleeping medicine - you know, the sleeping medicine my psychiatrist prescribed me, the medicine that's highly addictive and not suitable for long-term use but ( Read more... )

I'm going to post my big travelogue I wrote while I had no internet access or anything to do, I really am. It's not funny, it's not going to make you laugh except at me because it's certainly not with me. But that's ok, because if you know me you know I can usually extract the comedy in pretty much any situation that ends up fucking me over (and ( Read more... )

Yes, friends, I shall be saying goodbye. Not for long, of course. Perish the thought. But for some reason, even though I find it indescribably dull and mundane 99% of the time, being without internet just seems...incomplete. As cliche as that sounds (and oh god do I know it sounds cliche) that's the truth. It's a little scary, to be honest. Maybe I ( Read more... )

This update is distilled wisdom. This update must be studied sentence by sentence for hidden subtleties and depth. This update is filled with double-entendres, hidden jokes and veiled meanings. This update is life-changing; it signals the birth of a higher level of consciousness, a new standard to live by. This update is not written to be easily ( Read more... )