ding dong the fuckin witch is dead!

yesterday at work, my left arm went almost completely numb. i've decided if this happens again, it's open season on backhanding people. i won't feel it and i can say something to the effect of "my neurons are all criss crossed. i was really trying to tie my shoe. sorry"

this MS thing isn't like it looked on the brochure.

my liver and my soul need a transplant. STAT!

sombrero: check
two foot parrot: check
flag de mexico: check
beads with chili peppers: check
poncho villa moustache: check
mexican meal for two candy pack: check
total cost: $12.18

bring on the fifth.

my dad bought this stupid coffee that he keeps raving about. i think it tastes like supercheap vodka mixed with paint thinner. it's a buzz kill when you wake up, ready for morning coffee only to remember that it's fuckin turpentine when you go to drink it.

Your 80s Heartthrob Is
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i wrenched my back and my god ithurtsithurtsithurts.
COURT TOMORROW! eeee.

i just finished this novel, and at the end, the author has this thankyou laundry list. and it made me think i'd like to produce something like a book, or an album, win an award for being in a movie, etc. simply so i could write/speak a laundry list of thankyous. the actual work is only secondary to the thankyou page for me ( Read more... )

1. my parents just bought a new car, a honda element. we will get it on thursday ( Read more... )

so i saw ryan when i was in macomb (really, he came to my rescue). and he's grown up so much and is doing so well. it stirred up all of this shit in me. and i'm not sure what's going on. but i'm very confused.