My Friday: A Summary
a.k.a. despite actually being on top of my assorted abdominal issues and due a specialist appt for review soon, apparently the universe HATES ME TO DEATH.
1am: heading off to bed, feel vaguely nauseous but *shrug* that happens a lot with IBS
3am: sit bolt upright in bed, waking from dream of being gored by rampaging space rhino, only to discover that the acute abdominal pain is real, goddammit.
3.30am: have come to the rapid conclusion that something eaten on Thursday was not me-safe and therefore we’re going to have an unpleasant few hours until this IBS flare burns itself out.
4.30am: hopefully soon. C’mon body, we know it’s unpleasant but just get it over and done wi-
5am: THERE we go. Ugh. Still, better out than in, and at least my bowels will stop hating themselves?
5.30am: …or we could start vomiting too? Okay, I guess. It sucks balls, but ~5 minutes of this and I’m sure we’ll be feeling much better.
6am: um…guys? 5 minutes. FIVE.
6.02am: wait. Wait. What is that unpleasant sensation in my knicker-GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, UTERUS.
6.03am: shit shit shit. I need to take my meds before the reproductive fail gets traction-
6.04am: -or I could just puke them up too. Awesome.
6.30am: …this is not a normal IBS flare.
7.30am: …also, endometriosis, I hate you. Just so we’re clear.
SOME TIME PASSES, MAINLY BECAUSE I HAVE A GP APPT, BUT I CAN’T ACTUALLY MOVE MORE THAN A FOOT FROM THE TOILET AND HAVE IN FACT DRAGGED MOST OF MY BEDDING INTO THE BATHROOM AND AM NESTING IN A BELLIGERENT AND EXPLETIVE RIDDEN FASHION
10.30am: FINALLY MAKE IT TO THE GP.
11.15am: FINALLY SEE THE GP-SORRY YUMMY MUMMIES IN THE WAITING ROOM, BUT THE PERSON IN FOETAL POSITION ON THE FLOOR OF THE BATHROOM IN THE SURGERY GETS SEEN FIRST.
11.17am: warn GP not to palpate my pelvic abdomen unless she’s prepared to jump back.
11.17am: swing a left hook at the GP when she palpates my pelvic abdomen (she jumps back in time). Comes to conclusion that I have acute (viral) gastritis, which really sucks because it means that I can’t take any of the meds to shut down/alleviate the bad episode of endometriosis related woes I seem to also have. GP writes prescriptions and also advises that if I worsen, off to hospital I should take myself.
11.30am: coworker driving me to pharmacy to fill prescriptions for painkillers (suppositories) and anti-emetics.
11.31am: people are not meant to go that shade of grey. Coworker does a U-turn and off to the nearest A&E we rattle.
11.45am: people are even MORE not meant to go THAT colour (also passing out), coworker swerves-CAR ACCIDENT, HOLLA.
12pm: Sitting on the side of a main road, in a Kia with no left front wheel, being prodded by motorcycle paramedic. Get given entenox to huff on.
12.15pm: man I love nitrous oxide. I still feel like minced BALLS, but I give NO FUCKS.
1pm: so the actual ambulance that was coming to rescue us got involved in an RTA down the road from us (gaaaaas aaaaand aaaaaairrrrr)
1.30pm: second ambulance makes it to us, loads me in back, off to A&E we go.
1.40pm: hi there again A&E
1.50pm: noooo, give me back my entenox mask I need it to-oh wait, you want to i/v me?
2.10pm: whooooo methadone!
2.30pm: …and i guess all that saline rehydrating me is also nice. And the anti-nausea stuff.
4pm: I am willing to admit to membership of the human race, and am discharged-into the care of A Responsible Adult, because I am TRIPPING BALLS WHOOPS
4.45pm: get home, lay prone on sofa bed and finally manage to consume something without vomity death. Mmmm orange popsicle.
5.30pm: sleeeeep-
-
And that was pretty much that until 5am this morning, when I woke up. Still all virally and ugh, but have at least managed to take oral anti-nausea meds and drink some lucozade. Will attempt endometriosis meds shortly.
In conclusion: bleeeeeurgh.
Or the super short version: viral gastritis nixes ability to take endometriosis meds. With stunning sense of timing, period shows up. e-cat turns a whiter shade of pale. Coworker has car accident whilst taking me to A&E (and then we get to watch the ambulance coming for me get into a car accident a hundred yards down the road because apparently sirens and lights aren't an indication to NOT jump a junction, Mr. Landrover). End up in A&E on drip and all the i/v everythings. Come home. SLEEP LIKE THE DEAD.
Also on DreamWidth, comment where you will!
1am: heading off to bed, feel vaguely nauseous but *shrug* that happens a lot with IBS
3am: sit bolt upright in bed, waking from dream of being gored by rampaging space rhino, only to discover that the acute abdominal pain is real, goddammit.
3.30am: have come to the rapid conclusion that something eaten on Thursday was not me-safe and therefore we’re going to have an unpleasant few hours until this IBS flare burns itself out.
4.30am: hopefully soon. C’mon body, we know it’s unpleasant but just get it over and done wi-
5am: THERE we go. Ugh. Still, better out than in, and at least my bowels will stop hating themselves?
5.30am: …or we could start vomiting too? Okay, I guess. It sucks balls, but ~5 minutes of this and I’m sure we’ll be feeling much better.
6am: um…guys? 5 minutes. FIVE.
6.02am: wait. Wait. What is that unpleasant sensation in my knicker-GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, UTERUS.
6.03am: shit shit shit. I need to take my meds before the reproductive fail gets traction-
6.04am: -or I could just puke them up too. Awesome.
6.30am: …this is not a normal IBS flare.
7.30am: …also, endometriosis, I hate you. Just so we’re clear.
SOME TIME PASSES, MAINLY BECAUSE I HAVE A GP APPT, BUT I CAN’T ACTUALLY MOVE MORE THAN A FOOT FROM THE TOILET AND HAVE IN FACT DRAGGED MOST OF MY BEDDING INTO THE BATHROOM AND AM NESTING IN A BELLIGERENT AND EXPLETIVE RIDDEN FASHION
10.30am: FINALLY MAKE IT TO THE GP.
11.15am: FINALLY SEE THE GP-SORRY YUMMY MUMMIES IN THE WAITING ROOM, BUT THE PERSON IN FOETAL POSITION ON THE FLOOR OF THE BATHROOM IN THE SURGERY GETS SEEN FIRST.
11.17am: warn GP not to palpate my pelvic abdomen unless she’s prepared to jump back.
11.17am: swing a left hook at the GP when she palpates my pelvic abdomen (she jumps back in time). Comes to conclusion that I have acute (viral) gastritis, which really sucks because it means that I can’t take any of the meds to shut down/alleviate the bad episode of endometriosis related woes I seem to also have. GP writes prescriptions and also advises that if I worsen, off to hospital I should take myself.
11.30am: coworker driving me to pharmacy to fill prescriptions for painkillers (suppositories) and anti-emetics.
11.31am: people are not meant to go that shade of grey. Coworker does a U-turn and off to the nearest A&E we rattle.
11.45am: people are even MORE not meant to go THAT colour (also passing out), coworker swerves-CAR ACCIDENT, HOLLA.
12pm: Sitting on the side of a main road, in a Kia with no left front wheel, being prodded by motorcycle paramedic. Get given entenox to huff on.
12.15pm: man I love nitrous oxide. I still feel like minced BALLS, but I give NO FUCKS.
1pm: so the actual ambulance that was coming to rescue us got involved in an RTA down the road from us (gaaaaas aaaaand aaaaaairrrrr)
1.30pm: second ambulance makes it to us, loads me in back, off to A&E we go.
1.40pm: hi there again A&E
1.50pm: noooo, give me back my entenox mask I need it to-oh wait, you want to i/v me?
2.10pm: whooooo methadone!
2.30pm: …and i guess all that saline rehydrating me is also nice. And the anti-nausea stuff.
4pm: I am willing to admit to membership of the human race, and am discharged-into the care of A Responsible Adult, because I am TRIPPING BALLS WHOOPS
4.45pm: get home, lay prone on sofa bed and finally manage to consume something without vomity death. Mmmm orange popsicle.
5.30pm: sleeeeep-
-
And that was pretty much that until 5am this morning, when I woke up. Still all virally and ugh, but have at least managed to take oral anti-nausea meds and drink some lucozade. Will attempt endometriosis meds shortly.
In conclusion: bleeeeeurgh.
Or the super short version: viral gastritis nixes ability to take endometriosis meds. With stunning sense of timing, period shows up. e-cat turns a whiter shade of pale. Coworker has car accident whilst taking me to A&E (and then we get to watch the ambulance coming for me get into a car accident a hundred yards down the road because apparently sirens and lights aren't an indication to NOT jump a junction, Mr. Landrover). End up in A&E on drip and all the i/v everythings. Come home. SLEEP LIKE THE DEAD.
Also on DreamWidth, comment where you will!