shacking up with terrorists is never a good idea, Daniel =(
Jacob: SO I HEAR YOU'RE SHACKING UP WITH TERRORISTS NOW"
Daniel: *A* terrorist
just
the one
these days
>_>
Jacob: DIDN'T HE BREAK YOUR HEART ONCE BEFORE?"
Daniel: I USED TO BE A TERRORIST DAD, HALF MY NOBEL PEACE LAUREATES USED TO BE TERRORISTS, COME ON YOU KNOW THIS ABOUT ME
...yesshutup
Jacob: SO what make this this is DIFFERENT?
Daniel: WELL THIS TIME AT LEAST I AM GETTING SOME PRETTY AWESOME SEX FIRST
Jacob: Did NOT NEED DETAILS. SO are you going to teach him to be EVEN MORE DANGEROUS THIS TIME?
Daniel: THOSE WEREN'T DETAILS
TRUST ME
PROOOOBABLY NOT
Jacob: PROBABLY?
WHAT IS THIS 'PROBABLY'?
Daniel: JUST HEDGING MY BETS
Jacob: He's MAGNETO. WHAT IS THERE TO HEDGE? HE'S DANGEROUS /AND/ UNSTABLE.
DO YOU WANT TO GET HURT?
Daniel: not particularly, why does THAT matter?
Jacob: BECAUSE IT'S MAGNETO.
OR ARE YOU JUST ENJOYING UPSETING ME?
Daniel: WELL I AM ENJOYING THE SEX DOES THAT COUNT
Jacob: NO IT DOESN'T.
Daniel: WELL THEN NO
Jacob: GAH JUST WHAT ARE YOU THINKING? ARE YOU THINKING?
Daniel: I'M THINKING I LIKE HIM A LOT AND HE DOESN'T TREAT ME LIKE A CRAZY PERSON AND HE WAS ACQUITTED, SO LAY OFF
Jacob: OH YES THE MENTALLY UNSTABLE MEGLOMANIC LIKES YOU. AND HE WASN'T ACQUITTED OF THREATENING TO KILL THE ENTIRE PLANET. WHICH INCLUDES YOU BOY.
Daniel: I DIDN'T SAY HE LIKED ME, I SAID I LIKE HIM
DO YOU EVEN LISTEN WHEN I TALK
Jacob: OH COURSE I LISTEN. I'M LISTENING TO MY SON TELLING ME HE'S SHACKING UP WITH A MASS-MURDERING TERRORIST.
Daniel: THINK ABOUT IT THIS WAY
THE MORE I'M SCREWING HIM, THE LESS I'M SCREWING GERMANY
Jacob: oyveywhyme?Why?WHYDIDMYSONhavetoturnoutlikeTHIS. DO YOU DO THESE THINGS JUST TO HURT ME? WHY NOT DRIVE THE KNIFE INTO MY HEART YOURSELF?
Daniel: BECAUSE I'M KINKY, BUT I'M NOT THAT KINKY
/bitchfaceforever
Jacob: I DON'T WANT OR NEED TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE.
Daniel: THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP LECTURING ME ABOUT IT
Jacob: MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP MAKING TUPID CHOICES. I DIDN'T RAISE YOU TO BE STUPID.
Daniel: I GUESS SOME THINGS JUST COME NATURALLY
Jacob: /glaringforever
Daniel: /likewise
Jacob: WHAT ARE PEOPLE GOING TO SAY?
Daniel: I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T CARE. *LIKE ALWAYS*.
Jacob: YOUR PEOPLE
YOU THINK THEY ARE GOING TO WANT MAGNETO THERE?
Daniel: THEY WON'T FREAK OUT
I DIDN'T
SO
CLEARLY
Jacob: OH SURE. THEY'LL JUST LOVE THE IDEA OF HIM THERE. HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN THAT XORN MESS (Which...most people STILL think was Magneto)
Daniel: NO. BUT. LOOK, THEY'LL BE. OKAY. I MEAN. IT'S NOT LIKE I'M MAKING AN ANNOUNCEMENT ON THE NEWS, OKAY.
Jacob: YOU THINK HE WON'T BE NOTICED? IT'S NOT LIKE HIS VOICE AND FACE HAVEN'T BEEN ALL OVER THE NEWS.
Daniel: I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO KEEP HIM TIED TO MY BED ALL THE TIME
Jacob: GAH
STOP BEING SUCH A BRAT
Daniel: NEVER
Jacob: WHY NOT?
Daniel: BECAUSE COCKS
/SPUTTER
WHY DO YOU HAVE TO HAVE SUCH TERRIBLE CHOICE IN MEN DANIEL? /SO NOT TREATING YOU LIKE ISRAEL RIGHT NOW SINCE YOU AREN'T A GROWN UP!
Daniel: FUCK IF I KNOW, MAYBE I IMPRINTED ON ARTHUR OR SOMETHING.
Jacob: STOP BLAMING OTHERS FOR YOUR MISTAKES
Daniel: I THINK IT'S GENETIC
I MEAN, HAVE YOU *READ* ONE MACCABEES
GRAMPA WAS SO IN LOVE WITH ROME, IT IS /STILL/ EMBARRASSING
Jacob: Of course I have. THAT DOESN'T EXPLAIN WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING.
Daniel: WELL AT LEAST THIS WAY WHEN HE HURTS ME I WON'T BE SURPRISED?
[...that was less sarcastic than he intended ._. ]
Jacob: OH THAT MAKES IT SO MUCH BETTER
Daniel: IT MAKES IT SLIGHTLY BETTER
Jacob: NO IT DOESN'T
Daniel: IT DOES FOR ME
Jacob: HOW?
FUCK WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Daniel: IF YOU DON'T KNOW BY NOW, I REALLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN IT TO YOU.
Jacob: THIS IS A LITTLE BEYOND THAT.
Daniel: HOW
Jacob: YOU MAKE A HABIT OF SLEEPING WITH PEOPLE WITH HIS TRACT RECORD?
Daniel: NOT
HIS RECORD
SPECIFICALLY
Jacob: KILL THE ENTIRE PLANET RECORD? KILL EVERYLIVING THING RECORD? THE MASS MURDERING MILLIONS CLEARLY AND I STILL CAN'T FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE PLAYING AT THERE!
Daniel: IT'S NOT HIS RECORD IF HE DIDN'T GO THROUGH WITH IT, DAMNIT
Jacob: HE WOULD HAVE, WOULDN'T HE?
Daniel: BUT HE DIDN'T
Jacob: BECAUSE HE WAS STOPPED
Daniel: LUCKY EVERYONE
Jacob: SO WHAT HAPPENS THE NEXT SOMETHING SETS HIM OFF?
Daniel: MAYBE I GET MY HEART BROKEN, MAYBE EVERYTHING DIES
HOW WOULD THAT BE ANY DIFFERENT IF WE /WEREN'T/ SLEEPING TOGETHER?
Jacob: YOU WOULDN'T BE IN THE DIRECT LINE OF FIRE.
Daniel: YES I WOULD? THE PLANET IS THE PLANET, DAD.
Jacob: HOPEFULLY OTHERS WOULD TAKE HIM OUT FIRST. UNLESS YOU WANT TO WEAR THOSE SCARS FROM THAT BATTLE?
Daniel: I DON'T SEE WHY I SHOULD RELY ON ANYONE ELSE FOR SOMETHING THAT IMPORTANT 
Jacob: YOU THINK YOU CAN STOP HIM?
Daniel: YEAH
>_>
Jacob: HOW?
Daniel: ...YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW
Jacob: WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN READING SOME ROMANCE NOVELS OR SOMETHINNG?!
Daniel: ACTUALLY THIS HAS BEEN TESTED
Jacob: /waiting
Daniel: >______________>
Jacob: /having a drink
Daniel: /not saying anything else, dodido
Jacob: DANIEL.
Daniel: WHAT
Jacob: EXPLAIN YOURSELF
Daniel: LOOK HE JUST HAD A TEENY TINY BREAKDOWN AND I HANDLED IT, OKAY, IT WAS FINE
Jacob: TEENY TINY. WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HE HAS A BIG ONE?
Daniel: EITHER I'LL BE ABLE TO HANDLE IT OR I WON'T, BUT I DOUBT ANYONE ELSE WILL
Jacob: SO YOU HAVE TO TAKE THE CHANCE?
Daniel: WELL, I'M GOING TO
Jacob: WHY?
Daniel: BECAUSE I WANT TO
Jacob: WHY do you WANT to?
Daniel: BECAUSE
Jacob: THAT'S NOT AN ANSWER
Daniel: BECAUSE I DON'T FEEL LIKE SUCH A HOPELESS DAMAGED FREAK WITH HIM, OKAY?
...fuck
Jacob: ...
You AREN'T.
Daniel: DON'T BE STUPID
OF COURSE I AM
Jacob: DON'T CALL-You ARE NOT a hopless damaged freak, all right?
LISTEN TO ME.
You /AREN'T/.
Okay, okay, maybe INJURED. But not BROKEN, not DAMAGED.
Daniel: damn straight I'm not broken
are we done now?
Jacob: I think we should be.
For now.
Daniel: ohthankgod BYE DAD
Jacob: BYE SON
Daniel: ALL THE CLICKS