Now and Forever 4.6
Title: Now and Forever.
Fandom: RPS
Story: Highway: Airwaves 4.6
Characters: Alan Davies and Robert Sean Leonard
Authors: michelleann68 + evila_elf = evila_ann
Prompt: 10_per_genre A Simple Gift
Word Count: 2359
Rating: PG
Summary: Alan gets a surprise
Author's Notes:
Where it all began:
Big table of prompts is here:
Order of the story is here:
Previous story:
Late Night Arrival
Alan’s feet dragged as he shuffled his way into his flat. The worst thing about the day was, that for all the film that had been shot, very little of it was useable. And he would have to go through another kind of hell that was very much similar the next day. To top it off, today was his birthday. As he made the death march to yet another year older, he had to endure getting his ass kissed by people wishing him happy birthday. Now he was worn out and didn't think that he could stand to take another well wish, just happy to be in his flat where it was silent and devoid of well-wishes and coworkers who could not remember their lines.
He collapsed, rather than sat, in front of his computer, turning it on and closing his eyes as he waited for it to start up. His bed, behind him, was calling out his name, and he thought about it longingly. A chime sounded and he opened his eyes, clicking on the New Mail icon that flashed on the screen. He perked up a bit when he saw, amongst all the spam telling him how he could "last longer" and "solve his weight problem," a lone e-mail with a friendly name attached to it:
To: Alan Davies gunnerfan01@hotmail.com.uk
From: Bob theaterbobby@hotmail.com
Cc:
Subject: OPEN
Download me:
He blinked at the words and double-checked the sender. And he was disappointed. He really wanted to read what Robert had to say to him, to see if there was a mention at where he stood. Robert seemed to do all the right things, and say the right things, but Alan wondered if he really felt them. Sometimes he wished Robert would throw caution to the wind and be outlandish, he was pretty conservative in his actions, and that caused a niggling in the back of Alan's head. He didn't want another wish for a happy birthday. Not from Robert or anyone. He almost turned and headed to bed right there, but curiosity got the best of him and he clicked on the link, then began to wait for the download to complete. Robert was not the most technology-oriented of individuals. Alan smirked when he thought back to how hard it was to get Robert on IM for the first time. So Alan was just curious enough to stay up a little longer and see what Robert had been up to.
Alan looked at the download monitor and drummed his fingers impatiently as he watched the Kb/s count go from 30 to 40 and then back down to 5. Squeezing his eyes shut and figuring this might take some time, he stood up and prepared for bed. A watched pot doesn't boil or, in this case, a watched download slows to a crawl. Alan stretched his legs and scratched his tummy as he walked towards the bathroom. It was too late for a bath and he thought he might fall asleep and drown, so into the shower he went to wash off the day and the stress. He scrubbed his hair, washed his body, and shaved. He was distracted, busy thinking about what Robert had sent him, and it was a minute or two later when he realized he had put shower gel in his hair and shampoo on his body. Laughing at the way Robert could distract him from thousands of miles away, he quickly corrected his error and stepped out of the shower feeling a little bit better.
He dried off his skin with a fluffy white towel and scrubbed his hair, restoring bounce to the ringlets. He brushed his teeth, avoiding looking at himself in the mirror; he didn't want to see the bags forming under his eyes from the lack of sleep. He stretched again and padded back to the computer.
The download was at 95% and Alan laughed. Close but no cigar. He walked around his small flat and made sure it was locked up and all the lights were turned off. He grabbed a book off a bookshelf, something to read when he woke up, and returned to the bedroom, hoping he wasted enough time and was rewarded with the message, "Download Complete."
The file was zipped and Alan laughed. Robert was really making him work for this. He looked at the clock. One am. A quick calculation and he figured it was five pm in LA, Robert should still be on set. E-mail would have to do then tonight, if he could ever get this open. Surprised that he had not added a password to the hoops he was marching through, he smiled and watched the file unzip, trying not to think of what he would rather be unzipping. When the file was finally decompressed, Alan felt a glow of warmth cover him as he opened the folder and saw the 12 songs, no names, just numbered one to twelve, and a lonely word document. His cursor hovered over the word document and the entire title appeared, and Alan was now even more curious as to who Robert was getting internet lessons from.
"Do not open this document, listen to the songs in order first, Robert"
Curiosity now very peaked, Alan loaded all the songs onto a music player, then clicked on the first one. He had no idea what to expect, and very much didn’t expect the lively rhythm. He shook his head with a smile and leaned back in the chair. He tapped his foot and closed his eyes, thinking of sitting on Robert's couch engaged in a tickle fight, laughing and not able to touch the other man enough.
When I’m with you baby, I go out of my head
And I just can’t get enough, I just can’t get enough
All the things you do to me and everything you said
And I just can’t get enough, I just can’t get enough
When the last note faded away, the song that picked up in the brief second of silence was completely different. This tune was relaxing. He felt tears at the corners of his eyes as he listened to the lyrics:
I'm lying here tonight thinking of the days we've had
Wondering if the world would be so beautiful
If I had not looked into your eyes.
How did you know that I've been waiting?
I never knew the world would be so beautiful at all
Alan closed his eyes and saw Robert laying back, eyes closed, sleeping, and felt himself wishing that he would open them so he could see the light inside. This was how his fantasies were lately; him seducing Robert, touching him, stroking him.
I'm spending all the days dreaming of the nights we've had
I never knew that love would be a miracle
When I think of all the ones before
But now that I've found you I am flying
I never knew that love would be so beautiful to me
Alan swallowed the lump in his throat as the song faded. He paused the music and stood, walking to the kitchen for a glass of water. When he returned, he restarted the music, but remained standing. He turned up the volume, the soft music from the tiny speakers filling the room, and walked over to his window to look outside. It made him feel less closed in to look out at the city streets and watch the occasional car go by.
In the rain
I'm walking slowly
there's a light
in your apartment
I don't know why
I ache for you
And it's alright if
you're undecided or,
if you're scared
that you might like it or
if it's true,
I ache for you
There's no rhyme and there's no reason
you're the secret in the back of my skull
there's no logic, so please believe me
our love's confusing, but it never gets dull
Alan rested his head against the cool glass of the window, no longer seeing the outside, but seeing Robert in Central Park. He stayed that way as one song faded into another, remembering how his heart thundered in his chest when he had showed up on Robert's doorstep. He became lost in the memories they made in New York and his very soul ached to be with him again. He questioned if all the heartache was worth it and, on nights like tonight, it was. He finally blinked his eyes and moved away from the window, setting down his water and rubbing his arms. He hadn’t noticed the chill setting in. He returned to his chair as a new song started, the female singer mirroring his own thoughts.
I still hear your voice,
When you sleep next to me.
I still feel your touch,
in my dreams.
Forgive me my weakness,
But I don’t know why,
Without you it’s hard to survive
‘Cause every time we touch,
I get this feeling
And every time we kiss,
I swear I can fly
Can’t you feel my heart beat fast,
I want this to last,
Need you by my side
‘Cause every time we touch,
I feel the static,
And every time we kiss,
I reach for the sky,
Can’t you hear my heart beat slow
I can’t let you go,
I want you in my life.
Alan leaned forward, wrapping his fingers around a picture frame and dragged it closer, a picture that he could see even with eyes closed. Robert. Alan had bought a disposable camera for his stay in New York and amused himself by taking pictures, much to the annoyance of Robert, who only knew of about half of the pictures that were taken of him. One of the best ones that had turned out was of the day that they had taken the walk through the park. Robert had been looking at something and Alan had called out his name, taking the picture when he had started to turn towards him. His smile was light and relaxed. Happy. With a click he had captured his whole visit to New York in one frame. Warm, inviting, happy.
Watch my life,
Pass me by,
In the rear view mirror
Pictures frozen in time
Are becoming clearer
I don't wanna waste another day
Alan wiped at a stray tear, not conscious that he was doing so. The word document stood there and begged him to open it. Alan gave in, knowing that what he wanted was to fall asleep listening to the music. Setting it on autoplay, he double clicked and the document opened. Not long-winded, Robert had included the play list and a short message:
Happy Birthday, maybe next year we can celebrate together. Thinking of you, Robert.
It was a simple birthday greeting, and he smiled. It was the first time since he had woken up that he liked his birthday. His smile grew at the next song, it mirroring his own thoughts:
I want to thank you, my friend
For making me feel worthwhile.
Sweeter than the honey of your lips
And kindness in your smile
Hand in hand, we float across the room
Explosion deep inside
And cheek to cheek, there's clouds under my feet
There's only you and I
It figured that Robert would pick out two of the sappiest songs to end with. As Now and Forever started to play, he pushed the picture back into place and stood, his feeling of Robert-sickness reaching an all-time high. He needed this, needed Robert to do something to knock him for six. Here he was feeling like a lovesick fool, listening to a mixed tape from his boyfriend at almost 2 am, and there was nothing he would rather be doing...well, honestly there was, but this was a nice substitute since the real thing was just out of reach.
Sometimes I just hold you
Too caught up in me to see
I'm holding a fortune that heaven has given to me
I'll try to show you each and every way I can
Now and forever I will be your man
He cracked open the window a few inches then paused by the glowing computer screen, giving the picture one last look, finger trailing over the shiny surface and brushing the small frame. He was touched by all the trouble Robert had gone through for him. It was nice to feel adored, and he missed him missed more than ever. With a click, he turned off the light and crawled under the cold covers as the last song started playing.
Lying beside you, here in the dark
Feeling your heart beat with mine.
Softly you whisper, you’re so sincere
How could our love be so blind?
We sailed on together
We drifted apart
And here you are by my side
So now I come to you, with open arms
Nothing to hide, believe what I say.
So here I am with open arms
Hoping you’ll see what your love means to me
Open arms
Alan shivered, but not just from the cool air that swam into the room. Nonetheless, he pulled the covers up tighter under his chin. He closed his eyes, letting the lyrics continue to wash over him.
Living without you, living alone
This empty house seems so cold.
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near
How much I wanted you home.
But now that you’ve come back
Turned night into day
I need you to stay.
So now I come to you, with open arms
Nothing to hide, believe what I say.
So here I am with open arms
Hoping you’ll see what your love means to me
Open arms...
The music played on in his head, long after the song ended and the room was bathed in stillness again.
Alan slept. And dreamed.
The snow under Robert’s feet crunched. He paused, looking out over a field of white, lost in thought. He heard Alan call out his name and turned. A camera flash gave him temporary spots in front of his eyes and preserved the image forever.
Note:
Here is the fanmix we did:
1. Depeche Mode - Just Can't Get Enough
2. Chris DeBurgh - So Beautiful
3. Ben Lee - Ache for You
4. Depeche Mode - I want you now
5. Aqualung - Brighter than Sunshine
6. Cascada - Everytime we touch
7. Nick Lachey - What's left of me
8. Darren Hayes - What you Like
9. Vanessa Carlton - Thousand Miles
10. Def Leppard - Miss you in a heartbeat
11. Richard Marx - Now and Forever
12. Journey - Open Arms
Connecting
Fandom: RPS
Story: Highway: Airwaves 4.6
Characters: Alan Davies and Robert Sean Leonard
Authors: michelleann68 + evila_elf = evila_ann
Prompt: 10_per_genre A Simple Gift
Word Count: 2359
Rating: PG
Summary: Alan gets a surprise
Author's Notes:
Where it all began:
Big table of prompts is here:
Order of the story is here:
Previous story:
Late Night Arrival
Alan’s feet dragged as he shuffled his way into his flat. The worst thing about the day was, that for all the film that had been shot, very little of it was useable. And he would have to go through another kind of hell that was very much similar the next day. To top it off, today was his birthday. As he made the death march to yet another year older, he had to endure getting his ass kissed by people wishing him happy birthday. Now he was worn out and didn't think that he could stand to take another well wish, just happy to be in his flat where it was silent and devoid of well-wishes and coworkers who could not remember their lines.
He collapsed, rather than sat, in front of his computer, turning it on and closing his eyes as he waited for it to start up. His bed, behind him, was calling out his name, and he thought about it longingly. A chime sounded and he opened his eyes, clicking on the New Mail icon that flashed on the screen. He perked up a bit when he saw, amongst all the spam telling him how he could "last longer" and "solve his weight problem," a lone e-mail with a friendly name attached to it:
To: Alan Davies gunnerfan01@hotmail.com.uk
From: Bob theaterbobby@hotmail.com
Cc:
Subject: OPEN
Download me:
He blinked at the words and double-checked the sender. And he was disappointed. He really wanted to read what Robert had to say to him, to see if there was a mention at where he stood. Robert seemed to do all the right things, and say the right things, but Alan wondered if he really felt them. Sometimes he wished Robert would throw caution to the wind and be outlandish, he was pretty conservative in his actions, and that caused a niggling in the back of Alan's head. He didn't want another wish for a happy birthday. Not from Robert or anyone. He almost turned and headed to bed right there, but curiosity got the best of him and he clicked on the link, then began to wait for the download to complete. Robert was not the most technology-oriented of individuals. Alan smirked when he thought back to how hard it was to get Robert on IM for the first time. So Alan was just curious enough to stay up a little longer and see what Robert had been up to.
Alan looked at the download monitor and drummed his fingers impatiently as he watched the Kb/s count go from 30 to 40 and then back down to 5. Squeezing his eyes shut and figuring this might take some time, he stood up and prepared for bed. A watched pot doesn't boil or, in this case, a watched download slows to a crawl. Alan stretched his legs and scratched his tummy as he walked towards the bathroom. It was too late for a bath and he thought he might fall asleep and drown, so into the shower he went to wash off the day and the stress. He scrubbed his hair, washed his body, and shaved. He was distracted, busy thinking about what Robert had sent him, and it was a minute or two later when he realized he had put shower gel in his hair and shampoo on his body. Laughing at the way Robert could distract him from thousands of miles away, he quickly corrected his error and stepped out of the shower feeling a little bit better.
He dried off his skin with a fluffy white towel and scrubbed his hair, restoring bounce to the ringlets. He brushed his teeth, avoiding looking at himself in the mirror; he didn't want to see the bags forming under his eyes from the lack of sleep. He stretched again and padded back to the computer.
The download was at 95% and Alan laughed. Close but no cigar. He walked around his small flat and made sure it was locked up and all the lights were turned off. He grabbed a book off a bookshelf, something to read when he woke up, and returned to the bedroom, hoping he wasted enough time and was rewarded with the message, "Download Complete."
The file was zipped and Alan laughed. Robert was really making him work for this. He looked at the clock. One am. A quick calculation and he figured it was five pm in LA, Robert should still be on set. E-mail would have to do then tonight, if he could ever get this open. Surprised that he had not added a password to the hoops he was marching through, he smiled and watched the file unzip, trying not to think of what he would rather be unzipping. When the file was finally decompressed, Alan felt a glow of warmth cover him as he opened the folder and saw the 12 songs, no names, just numbered one to twelve, and a lonely word document. His cursor hovered over the word document and the entire title appeared, and Alan was now even more curious as to who Robert was getting internet lessons from.
"Do not open this document, listen to the songs in order first, Robert"
Curiosity now very peaked, Alan loaded all the songs onto a music player, then clicked on the first one. He had no idea what to expect, and very much didn’t expect the lively rhythm. He shook his head with a smile and leaned back in the chair. He tapped his foot and closed his eyes, thinking of sitting on Robert's couch engaged in a tickle fight, laughing and not able to touch the other man enough.
When I’m with you baby, I go out of my head
And I just can’t get enough, I just can’t get enough
All the things you do to me and everything you said
And I just can’t get enough, I just can’t get enough
When the last note faded away, the song that picked up in the brief second of silence was completely different. This tune was relaxing. He felt tears at the corners of his eyes as he listened to the lyrics:
I'm lying here tonight thinking of the days we've had
Wondering if the world would be so beautiful
If I had not looked into your eyes.
How did you know that I've been waiting?
I never knew the world would be so beautiful at all
Alan closed his eyes and saw Robert laying back, eyes closed, sleeping, and felt himself wishing that he would open them so he could see the light inside. This was how his fantasies were lately; him seducing Robert, touching him, stroking him.
I'm spending all the days dreaming of the nights we've had
I never knew that love would be a miracle
When I think of all the ones before
But now that I've found you I am flying
I never knew that love would be so beautiful to me
Alan swallowed the lump in his throat as the song faded. He paused the music and stood, walking to the kitchen for a glass of water. When he returned, he restarted the music, but remained standing. He turned up the volume, the soft music from the tiny speakers filling the room, and walked over to his window to look outside. It made him feel less closed in to look out at the city streets and watch the occasional car go by.
In the rain
I'm walking slowly
there's a light
in your apartment
I don't know why
I ache for you
And it's alright if
you're undecided or,
if you're scared
that you might like it or
if it's true,
I ache for you
There's no rhyme and there's no reason
you're the secret in the back of my skull
there's no logic, so please believe me
our love's confusing, but it never gets dull
Alan rested his head against the cool glass of the window, no longer seeing the outside, but seeing Robert in Central Park. He stayed that way as one song faded into another, remembering how his heart thundered in his chest when he had showed up on Robert's doorstep. He became lost in the memories they made in New York and his very soul ached to be with him again. He questioned if all the heartache was worth it and, on nights like tonight, it was. He finally blinked his eyes and moved away from the window, setting down his water and rubbing his arms. He hadn’t noticed the chill setting in. He returned to his chair as a new song started, the female singer mirroring his own thoughts.
I still hear your voice,
When you sleep next to me.
I still feel your touch,
in my dreams.
Forgive me my weakness,
But I don’t know why,
Without you it’s hard to survive
‘Cause every time we touch,
I get this feeling
And every time we kiss,
I swear I can fly
Can’t you feel my heart beat fast,
I want this to last,
Need you by my side
‘Cause every time we touch,
I feel the static,
And every time we kiss,
I reach for the sky,
Can’t you hear my heart beat slow
I can’t let you go,
I want you in my life.
Alan leaned forward, wrapping his fingers around a picture frame and dragged it closer, a picture that he could see even with eyes closed. Robert. Alan had bought a disposable camera for his stay in New York and amused himself by taking pictures, much to the annoyance of Robert, who only knew of about half of the pictures that were taken of him. One of the best ones that had turned out was of the day that they had taken the walk through the park. Robert had been looking at something and Alan had called out his name, taking the picture when he had started to turn towards him. His smile was light and relaxed. Happy. With a click he had captured his whole visit to New York in one frame. Warm, inviting, happy.
Watch my life,
Pass me by,
In the rear view mirror
Pictures frozen in time
Are becoming clearer
I don't wanna waste another day
Alan wiped at a stray tear, not conscious that he was doing so. The word document stood there and begged him to open it. Alan gave in, knowing that what he wanted was to fall asleep listening to the music. Setting it on autoplay, he double clicked and the document opened. Not long-winded, Robert had included the play list and a short message:
Happy Birthday, maybe next year we can celebrate together. Thinking of you, Robert.
It was a simple birthday greeting, and he smiled. It was the first time since he had woken up that he liked his birthday. His smile grew at the next song, it mirroring his own thoughts:
I want to thank you, my friend
For making me feel worthwhile.
Sweeter than the honey of your lips
And kindness in your smile
Hand in hand, we float across the room
Explosion deep inside
And cheek to cheek, there's clouds under my feet
There's only you and I
It figured that Robert would pick out two of the sappiest songs to end with. As Now and Forever started to play, he pushed the picture back into place and stood, his feeling of Robert-sickness reaching an all-time high. He needed this, needed Robert to do something to knock him for six. Here he was feeling like a lovesick fool, listening to a mixed tape from his boyfriend at almost 2 am, and there was nothing he would rather be doing...well, honestly there was, but this was a nice substitute since the real thing was just out of reach.
Sometimes I just hold you
Too caught up in me to see
I'm holding a fortune that heaven has given to me
I'll try to show you each and every way I can
Now and forever I will be your man
He cracked open the window a few inches then paused by the glowing computer screen, giving the picture one last look, finger trailing over the shiny surface and brushing the small frame. He was touched by all the trouble Robert had gone through for him. It was nice to feel adored, and he missed him missed more than ever. With a click, he turned off the light and crawled under the cold covers as the last song started playing.
Lying beside you, here in the dark
Feeling your heart beat with mine.
Softly you whisper, you’re so sincere
How could our love be so blind?
We sailed on together
We drifted apart
And here you are by my side
So now I come to you, with open arms
Nothing to hide, believe what I say.
So here I am with open arms
Hoping you’ll see what your love means to me
Open arms
Alan shivered, but not just from the cool air that swam into the room. Nonetheless, he pulled the covers up tighter under his chin. He closed his eyes, letting the lyrics continue to wash over him.
Living without you, living alone
This empty house seems so cold.
Wanting to hold you, wanting you near
How much I wanted you home.
But now that you’ve come back
Turned night into day
I need you to stay.
So now I come to you, with open arms
Nothing to hide, believe what I say.
So here I am with open arms
Hoping you’ll see what your love means to me
Open arms...
The music played on in his head, long after the song ended and the room was bathed in stillness again.
Alan slept. And dreamed.
The snow under Robert’s feet crunched. He paused, looking out over a field of white, lost in thought. He heard Alan call out his name and turned. A camera flash gave him temporary spots in front of his eyes and preserved the image forever.
Note:
Here is the fanmix we did:
1. Depeche Mode - Just Can't Get Enough
2. Chris DeBurgh - So Beautiful
3. Ben Lee - Ache for You
4. Depeche Mode - I want you now
5. Aqualung - Brighter than Sunshine
6. Cascada - Everytime we touch
7. Nick Lachey - What's left of me
8. Darren Hayes - What you Like
9. Vanessa Carlton - Thousand Miles
10. Def Leppard - Miss you in a heartbeat
11. Richard Marx - Now and Forever
12. Journey - Open Arms
Connecting