[Diary Entry | 100% Secure]
[[OOC Note: Diary entries are written in Dr. Horrible's actual, pen-and-paper diary, not through the crow. While they are placed here so you can read them and be amused, they are not accessible to any characters unless those characters sneak into his house, steal the diary, and read it.]]
Well, I'm not dead yet. I am living on borrowed time. My only hope is that Bad Horse will accept the excuse that I was kidnapped and not smash my head to a pulp. Still trying to figure out who did this. It's an ingenious plan. Kidnap me, the lynchpin of the League's operation? The rest of them are doomed to failure. Especially Fake Thomas Jefferson... but he should have been kicked out a long time ago. See my previous rants on the subject.
Whoever kidnapped me has left me in the middle of nowhere. I'm in a crappy village named Sheol. Given the state of things, I'm amazed this place has indoor plumbing. However, I'd put up with a hole in the ground in exchange for a cell phone signal. I thought the whole point of Cingular was that it has bars EVERYWHERE, even in... bumfuck... Appalachia, or wherever. I can't get a GPS signal either. This place doesn't even have a paved road. I wouldn't be surprised to find out it's literally off the map. But, since they have open houses just... y'know, sitting around, I've commandeered one as a base of operations and I am working on a plan to get myself back to civilization. It's pretty simple, actually. Step 1: Repair Death Ray. Step 2: Threaten residents with Death Ray until someone coughs up some USEFUL information. All I've been able to get out of anybody so far is some cult crap about how we're all dead and this is Hell. Hello, I saw 'The Village', and can I just say that you get NO props for modeling your dinky little cult after what was arguably NOT one of M. Night Shyamalan's better efforts? Besides, I always thought hell would involve, I don't know, FIRE?
Sorry crazy cult people, F for effort, F for creativity. B- for execution, though, I've seen a couple very... subtle, very... nuanced performances. Bravo. You get golf claps.
Of course, fixing the Death Ray is going to be a problem. Apparently the heat generated by the device feedback when it was broken (note to self: ask next person who kidnaps me to be MORE CAREFUL with my STUFF) fused a couple of the panels, not to mention a whole handful of circuits. I just managed to crack open the power source panel and the wonderflonium appears to be intact, but it's going to take at least a week to fix all the damage. I've got some tools, and the basic wire and solder kit for emergency repairs, but that's sort of like putting a band-aid on a broken bone. The risk of it backfiring if I jury-rig it is too great. And I don't suppose there's an electronics shop here in the middle of nowhere where I could get the parts and equipment I need. Plus, if I try to remove the wonderflonium without having the proper container to keep it in, it'll start degrading and give me radiation poisoning in the process.
Yeah, this is SUCH an AWESOME cluster-fuck. Thanks a lot, whoever pulled this job. Don't relax. You haven't beaten me. Dr. Horrible WILL find a way out of this nightmare, and then you'll be the one begging to wake up.
Well, I'm not dead yet. I am living on borrowed time. My only hope is that Bad Horse will accept the excuse that I was kidnapped and not smash my head to a pulp. Still trying to figure out who did this. It's an ingenious plan. Kidnap me, the lynchpin of the League's operation? The rest of them are doomed to failure. Especially Fake Thomas Jefferson... but he should have been kicked out a long time ago. See my previous rants on the subject.
Whoever kidnapped me has left me in the middle of nowhere. I'm in a crappy village named Sheol. Given the state of things, I'm amazed this place has indoor plumbing. However, I'd put up with a hole in the ground in exchange for a cell phone signal. I thought the whole point of Cingular was that it has bars EVERYWHERE, even in... bumfuck... Appalachia, or wherever. I can't get a GPS signal either. This place doesn't even have a paved road. I wouldn't be surprised to find out it's literally off the map. But, since they have open houses just... y'know, sitting around, I've commandeered one as a base of operations and I am working on a plan to get myself back to civilization. It's pretty simple, actually. Step 1: Repair Death Ray. Step 2: Threaten residents with Death Ray until someone coughs up some USEFUL information. All I've been able to get out of anybody so far is some cult crap about how we're all dead and this is Hell. Hello, I saw 'The Village', and can I just say that you get NO props for modeling your dinky little cult after what was arguably NOT one of M. Night Shyamalan's better efforts? Besides, I always thought hell would involve, I don't know, FIRE?
Sorry crazy cult people, F for effort, F for creativity. B- for execution, though, I've seen a couple very... subtle, very... nuanced performances. Bravo. You get golf claps.
Of course, fixing the Death Ray is going to be a problem. Apparently the heat generated by the device feedback when it was broken (note to self: ask next person who kidnaps me to be MORE CAREFUL with my STUFF) fused a couple of the panels, not to mention a whole handful of circuits. I just managed to crack open the power source panel and the wonderflonium appears to be intact, but it's going to take at least a week to fix all the damage. I've got some tools, and the basic wire and solder kit for emergency repairs, but that's sort of like putting a band-aid on a broken bone. The risk of it backfiring if I jury-rig it is too great. And I don't suppose there's an electronics shop here in the middle of nowhere where I could get the parts and equipment I need. Plus, if I try to remove the wonderflonium without having the proper container to keep it in, it'll start degrading and give me radiation poisoning in the process.
Yeah, this is SUCH an AWESOME cluster-fuck. Thanks a lot, whoever pulled this job. Don't relax. You haven't beaten me. Dr. Horrible WILL find a way out of this nightmare, and then you'll be the one begging to wake up.