I'm the first person to write that, really.
Like every other red blooded american, I saw Return of the King this week. Also, like every red blooded american with a Lj, I am going to post my opinions and experience.
The scenes that I was looking forward to from the book wern't really there. I wanted to see Gandalf speak to Sauroman at Isengard. I especially wanted to see how Chritopher Lee would handle that battle of words and wits. I like it how Sauroman, surrounded by a vastly superior force, by only using his voice, almost has everyone packing up, saying they are sorry, rotating his tires and rubbing his feet. Then Gandalf laughs it off and says something like, "you should have been a court jester" and breaks his spell.
They also left out the Palintir of Minas Tirith, the source of Denathor's madness. I thought that that was pretty important. Without it, he is just some dick.
Am I wrong, or did the elves and dwarves come when they were storming the Black Gate in the Books? It has been a while since I've read them, but I seem to remember them showing up at the end, like in the Hobbit.
Here I am, bitching, but to put those things in would have added another hour at least (which is fine by me). I can live without Tom Bombadil, Goldberry, the barrow downs, Quickbeam and the Hobbits overthrowing Sauroman and Grima; but the Palintir seemed pretty essential, the Sauroman parlay entertaining, and the other armies showing up would have just taken a "hey look, the elves/dwarves are here!" Maybe in the extended version.
The theater was packed. Luckily, I had a clear shot at the screen, there wern't any dumb, loud teens snickering at every "Mr Frodo" and saying "Heh, he's gay" and there wern't any mothers breast feeding (yes, that did happen). I was ready to enjoy the concluding chapter in one of my favorite fantasy epics. Then, about forty minutes into it, I hear a voice whisper, "I need to go potty". I look to my right to see a seven year old girl who should have been at Harry Potter and her twenty something father, who is cursing a stream of profanity in his head, but says OK out loud to his daughter. This girl couldn't sit still. She sat in her seat and bounced. She asked simple questions over and over, "Is that that guys brother?" Then she sat on his lap and bounced. She was using my armrest like it was put there for her. She took a nap sprawled out on her dad and invading my territorial bubble for the rest of the movie. At least she was still. It could have been worse, like the dad resting his head on my elbow for forty minutes.