Essay Tiems Nao?
What You See Is What You Get
What did you do before you left for work/school/adventuring/etc this morning? Woke up, probably, right? Washed up, got dressed, maybe ate some breakfast (or if you're anything like me, desparately guzzled down enough coffee to put a horse in a coma). Chances are you probably looked in the mirror at least once. Right? Hey, don't worry, even if you didn't, I probably did more than enough times for both of us. Shut up, putting on makeup takes time.
Let's face it: image matters. Everyone knows it. Not only in terms of how you present yourself to the rest of the world, but also in how you perceive yourself. Self image determines how you carry yourself and how you behave around others. If you've got a good, strong, positive self-image, you might be more wont to throw yourself into things, act and speak with a great deal of confidence and comfort. If you've got a comparatively deflated self-image....well, chances are, you're just happy to get through the day flying completely under the radar.
Whenever you present a character, self-image matters, too. A drama teacher I once had said "When you read and perform a monologue, I want you to assign your character a number from 1 to 10, in terms of how they perceive their self. A 1 for those with no sense of importance, a 10 for people who think they're a pretty big deal." Again, this is important to their carriage and interactions.
The Monster In The Mirror
Oh, boy. Where to even start with this? One of the complexities of playing Midna stems from her self-image. Midna comes in two main flavors: Princess of the Twili and That Weird Little Imp Thing. Midna has spent the majority of her life as the former. Now let's face it, anyone who looks like that would probably ping as a 10. I honestly wouldn't be surprised if she weren't used to getting advances, or at least, causing a few accidents while passing by. Compounded with good looks, though, there's also some pretty hefty status. Midna may have come from some humble origins, but she's lined up to be the queen. Before Zant decided to have his little usurption carnival, she was a week away from becoming the single most important woman, nay, important person in the Twilight Kingdom. And she was pretty comfortable with this arrangement. So, yes, she might've just had a teeeeny, tiny bit of self-esteem.
Zant's uprising did a real number on that. I'd imagine, that in order to pull off something of the scale he did, he had to start by cutting off the head: curse Midna (which, in the cutscene, seems to have left her out of comission for a while, since she looks pretty dizzy and unsteady on her feet), and then sweep in and occupy the necessary territory for a state overhaul. In a matter of hours, bam. There goes that self-image, there goes the kingdom. There goes everything she is. A strong, competent, and imposingly attactive woman is now...a helpless, weird-looking little imp. Talk about your cognitive dissonance, huh?
And nothing drives home that helplessness and failure like looking in the mirror every day. Any reflective surface, or even just looking down, for that matter. Any moment she is aware of her cursed body is a reminder of how she's failed her people and how far she's fallen. Owch.
A Blessing In Disguise
Almost literally. While she finds the imp body is downright shameful for what it represents, Midna also recognizes that there's plenty that's useful about it. For one, it's some measure of protection, by way of anonymity. Her people know her as flavor one, Twilight Princess. Enemies might not know to be on the lookout for flavor two, Weird Little Imp Thing. And it's easier to face her people in battle and condone/order Link to kill them when she knows they can't tell it's their queen doing it. As an imp, she's freed from many of her most basic identifiers and social expectations. She doesn't look remotely human...or for our purposes, like a person. She doesn't look like any sort of living thing, just this strange little fairy-tale creature. And in a lot of ways, she's been freed from responsibilities beyond her most immediate ones. She's pretty much freed from identity. She's not a queen, a princess, or even a woman-- she's reduced to the locus of a force of vengeance. And so she doesn't have to behave like anything besides one.
Do Unto Others...
As the imp, she's willing to treat others badly in order to get her way. She doesn't really expect ladylike treatment from them, either, though she will joke about it. Ohhhh, she'll joke about her girlish figure alright, and her "stunning good looks" as an imp, because she finds it pretty hilarious. She doesn't think the imp form is at all attractive, but she gets a big kick out of the irony of it all (especially since she knows what she really looks like). Anyway, I digress. Because she doesn't hold herself fully responsible as Midna-the-imp, she's more prone to treating people badly, talking and behaving a little more dramatically...stuff she'd do if she weren't a princess. Because when she's not a princess, she's a sociopath! But more on that at eleven.
So the few times she's been de-cursed ingame, well. She doesn't know how to deal with it. Her disguise is her protection. It's her shield. Both physically and emotionally. Allowing people who've seen her acting her worst to see her as the princess, all the while knowing what she's said and done...again, owch. I mean, what would her people say if they known? What would the former king, the closest thing she's had to a father, say if he knew? She doesn't put a lot of stock in what people think of her, but she does have responsibilities, you know. It's uncomfortable, and exposing. It puts her in a uniquely vulnerable position. Her instinct is to act more like a "princess" (I use the term in the loosest sense-- not ladylike so much as a woman of importance, power, and responsibility) and less like an imp. But she knows these people already know. Oh. God. She really hates having to own up for the things she's doing.
So In Conclusion...
...that's about all there is to say about the many faces of Midna! I've been meaning to sit down and organize my thoughts on how she feels and deals with body and identity issues, and hopefully this is all I'll need to do. Even more, I hope this makes some sense of her actions and behavior to the people she's interacted with. (*Taps screen*. Hiya there, is anyone reading this? Stalkers of the comm friendslist? Hi! Don't worry, I stalk compulsively, too. It's not creepy, it's reconnaissance.) I think I touched on everything I wanted to! If there's any questions, stick around for office hours. Don't worry, this won't be on the final, but I do expect you to review the section on diodes. Class dismissed!