FIVE ♦ VIDEO | Day 20, Evening

[toxicinvestment]

[He's playing with a kitchen knife. It might be familiar -- it's the same one he used to murder someone onscreen way back when, after all. He sits for a moment, thinking of exactly what he wants to say.]Every batch of new arrivals, and it's the same thing. He's never one of them

Comments

[video]

[magerights]

You actually want your brother to turn up here?

gdit I do not have the icons for this

[toxicinvestment]

I said now!

[He really can't help it that his voice cracks. He's doing his best to hold it together, but he's trembling despite the spell, and if he weren't entirely held still he'd be struggling something fierce. His head is filled with the image of a sadistic smile, the smell of blood, and the memory of how it felt to be torn apart and broken -- and he really can't handle it.]

I don't care about your pride. Just stop it!

alfk I still feel really bad for him JUST SO YOU KNOW

[magerights]

[That thread of fear hits him hard and Anders immediately dismisses the glyph, jerk back as though struck. He's suddenly, keenly aware of his own fears of being locked away with chains and cells, and he feels guilty and sick at the thought that he might have made someone else feel that way in turn.]

Maker, please, I didn't--

SOB BUT HE'S A DICK WHO PROVOKES EVERYTHING.

[toxicinvestment]

[All Mao really wants to do right now is run away and hide somewhere safe. At the same time, he wants to retaliate and punch Anders in the face -- but once he's released, his body kind of chooses neither. He'd been tensing against being held, and once he isn't anymore that force and the weakness that comes with that level of fear knocks his feet out from under him. He ends up crumpling to the floor and breathing hard, shaking and resisting the urge to throw up even as he wills himself to calm down.]

You are a foul human being. [It's just spiteful lashing out -- he knows perfectly well that Anders can't have known how badly such a harmless bit of magic would effect him -- but he throws every bit of disdainful malice into it that he can.]

YEAH BUT ANDERS IS JUST AS BAD DX

[magerights]

I know.

[He has to fight the urge to try and help. The last thing Mao is going to want is to have him getting any closer, he imagines.]

I'm sorry, I had no right to do that to you. You have every reason to hate me for it.

THEY ARE BOTH DICKS THAT CAN PICK ON EACH OTHER THEN

[toxicinvestment]

You're damn right I do.

[He scowls, but he's getting it together, and pushing himself back to his feet.]

Is it clearer to you why I don't trust anyone now? There's always the chance they'll be like you, or worse. You're a self-righteous idiot, but what if you weren't just that? I don't want you or anyone else near me.

THEN FENRIS CAN GET INVOLVED AND IT'LL BE A DICK THREEWAY /shot

[magerights]

["or worse". Mao can't possibly know how close to home that hits, and Anders closes his eyes.]

I understand. I won't try and stop you from leaving, or doing anything else.

OH NO! DICKOFF!

[toxicinvestment]

[He just snorts, not at all amused, and gathers his composure to leave. Maybe he should feel bad that Anders is clearly more than regretful, but no -- Mao's selfish, and he's also too shaken to care about the feelings of the person who caused it.]

Try to think before you act from now on.

[And with that he's going to stalk off just slow enough not to be obviously escaping.]

TOO MANY DICKS ON THE DANCEFLOOR

[magerights]

[He doesn't say anything in answer to that, simply waits until Mao is gone and returns to his room to angst in silence.]