(no subject)
so I'm home.
and I'm so incredibly disappointed with how this trip went.
and I don't want to be home now.
I actually want to still be in mackinac island. I want saturday night to never have ended.
I'm wearing a black silk tie that I never want to take off. but I know I will have to. I want to listen to my copy of ratfe greatest hits, not just because I love it. but because that would mean I was listening to it with the person who has it now. I want to feel the way I did saturday night. when it didn't matter that I was freezing cold. and then it didn't matter that we were laying in the middle of the hallway in the grand hotel. I want to be there again so I could have had something to say when he said "make me feel special". I wish I could have thought of an embarassing moment to tell him, because that's what he wanted. I wish I wasn't so shy so that I could have spent 3 amazing days instead of just one. I wish all of this didn't make me feel like such a fucking asshole. and I wish this wasn't going to cause trouble. but I think it is. in a lot of ways. and I wish I would get an email right now.
we took the 10:00 boat back to mackinaw city. we took off in the car at about 11. I slept until we got home at about 4. then I went to bed. I woke up a few times, got up and checked my email (in vain). went back to sleep. woke up periodically. once at about 10 to my phone...hi I'm an asshole. and didn't actually get up until about 6:20. that's a lot of sleep and I still feel like shit. and my legs hurt so much. and I want to go back to sleep because no one is awake. and I haven't eaten since the 3 bites of food I had yesterday at like 7:30 in the morning. bee tea double you, who puts ketchup on their biscuits and gravy? definately ruined my breakfast.
alright. maybe a better recap will come later. when I have less weird emotion flying around.
and I'm so incredibly disappointed with how this trip went.
and I don't want to be home now.
I actually want to still be in mackinac island. I want saturday night to never have ended.
I'm wearing a black silk tie that I never want to take off. but I know I will have to. I want to listen to my copy of ratfe greatest hits, not just because I love it. but because that would mean I was listening to it with the person who has it now. I want to feel the way I did saturday night. when it didn't matter that I was freezing cold. and then it didn't matter that we were laying in the middle of the hallway in the grand hotel. I want to be there again so I could have had something to say when he said "make me feel special". I wish I could have thought of an embarassing moment to tell him, because that's what he wanted. I wish I wasn't so shy so that I could have spent 3 amazing days instead of just one. I wish all of this didn't make me feel like such a fucking asshole. and I wish this wasn't going to cause trouble. but I think it is. in a lot of ways. and I wish I would get an email right now.
we took the 10:00 boat back to mackinaw city. we took off in the car at about 11. I slept until we got home at about 4. then I went to bed. I woke up a few times, got up and checked my email (in vain). went back to sleep. woke up periodically. once at about 10 to my phone...hi I'm an asshole. and didn't actually get up until about 6:20. that's a lot of sleep and I still feel like shit. and my legs hurt so much. and I want to go back to sleep because no one is awake. and I haven't eaten since the 3 bites of food I had yesterday at like 7:30 in the morning. bee tea double you, who puts ketchup on their biscuits and gravy? definately ruined my breakfast.
alright. maybe a better recap will come later. when I have less weird emotion flying around.