I am a complete retard.

[eyes_of_cyrene]

I can't get the mower to work.

Before you hasten to reassure me with your own horror stories about gardening machines, you have to understand something... we have a reel mower. Specifically this model.





So. I've tried everything. Yes, I understand I have to PUSH it. The blades just won't move.

Defeated by a non-motorized piece of gardening machinery *sigh*