1000 Themes - #394 - Hetalia/Homestuck - Russia x Dave
Title: Illness
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: AU, language, mute!Dave, human!Russia
Words: 592
Series: Axis Powers Hetalia/Homestuck crossover
Pairings/Characters: Russia x Dave
"What do you imagine talking is like?"
Dave didn't budge. He sat, hidden eyes transfixed on his dimming screen, appearing lost in thought. Once or twice his thumbs twitched toward the phone, but nothing ever came of the instinctive urges. Silent, Dave shook his head. Despite the denial of an answer, he soon enough began typing, clackity-clacking until he was satisfied. He held out the phone for Ivan to read with such an urgent gesture it made his Russian company jump to attention in his wooden chair.
TG: what do you imagine at all
Ivan smiled. "I like to imagine what it must feel like to live in a warm place."
Too fast for Ivan to have noticed, Dave had another message prepared:
TG: texas sucks man dont do it
"Oh, it does?"
TG: yes
"Hmm...then I'll have to look somewhere else. But I imagine other things, between you and me."
TG: i am not a homosexual
"I don't think that matters, here."
TG: then what the fuck is it
TG: stop pausing to give me enough time to type this shit out
TG: i know it's courtesy and all that
TG: but i mean really is this necessary
"I like to imagine what you must sound like."
Dave didn't type anything. Ivan waited an allotted fifteen seconds before proceeding.
"Often what you you must sound like begging. Mostly for mercy, but any kind will do."
It took Dave twenty seconds to respond.
TG: dude seriously you are one sick fuck
Ivan cocked his head and bit his lower lip. "I do not understand. I am not ill, as you can tell! I would not have been allowed into work today if I were."
Expression indistinguishable, Dave stared at him for a moment before tapping furiously on his iPhone, clicking away at a one-way Pesterchum chat. Ivan waited patiently, hands folded over his lap, just as he always did. When Dave finished, Ivan beamed a smile at him, enthralled to read the latest spout of red text. He was never allowed to hold the phone, however, but he was content with leaning forward to see. He liked that color...so red and bold...
TG: i am not ill what kind of fucking lie is that
TG: look man you have got an illness that no medicine can fix
TG: its like johns mancrush on nic cage
TG: nothing can be done
TG: why are you my therapist
TG: i dont need one and youre more fucking batshit that i am
TG: and im not for the record
TG: how about that irony all up in this flighty psycho bullshit
"I've told you before, Dave, I don't understand your "irony," as you say."
TG: im done
"Excuse me?"
TG: this session is over
TG: terminated
TG: it is so done with that it should have been over thirty-one minutes and seventeen seconds ago
Ivan's smile curled as he settled back into his plush leather seat. "I'm afraid you still have twenty-something minutes left, Dave. You're not allowed to leave before hand."
Dave began typing, but this time Ivan interrupted him.
"Why? Are you done talking to me?"
The deep-set frown told Ivan all he needed to know, yet he found himself terribly disappointed by the lack of a tangible reaction.
"Very well. I will continue talking, then. There are a lot of things I would do to you if I could, Dave! All the sounds you would make, the faces! It's really a shame I'm your therapist, I can't actually do anything without losing my job! So, let's start with this begging fantasy I have of you."
Dave began counting down the time left, iPhone clutched in his hand and face in his knees. Eighteen minutes and forty-seven seconds, forty-six seconds, forty-five seconds, forty-four seconds...
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: AU, language, mute!Dave, human!Russia
Words: 592
Series: Axis Powers Hetalia/Homestuck crossover
Pairings/Characters: Russia x Dave
"What do you imagine talking is like?"
Dave didn't budge. He sat, hidden eyes transfixed on his dimming screen, appearing lost in thought. Once or twice his thumbs twitched toward the phone, but nothing ever came of the instinctive urges. Silent, Dave shook his head. Despite the denial of an answer, he soon enough began typing, clackity-clacking until he was satisfied. He held out the phone for Ivan to read with such an urgent gesture it made his Russian company jump to attention in his wooden chair.
TG: what do you imagine at all
Ivan smiled. "I like to imagine what it must feel like to live in a warm place."
Too fast for Ivan to have noticed, Dave had another message prepared:
TG: texas sucks man dont do it
"Oh, it does?"
TG: yes
"Hmm...then I'll have to look somewhere else. But I imagine other things, between you and me."
TG: i am not a homosexual
"I don't think that matters, here."
TG: then what the fuck is it
TG: stop pausing to give me enough time to type this shit out
TG: i know it's courtesy and all that
TG: but i mean really is this necessary
"I like to imagine what you must sound like."
Dave didn't type anything. Ivan waited an allotted fifteen seconds before proceeding.
"Often what you you must sound like begging. Mostly for mercy, but any kind will do."
It took Dave twenty seconds to respond.
TG: dude seriously you are one sick fuck
Ivan cocked his head and bit his lower lip. "I do not understand. I am not ill, as you can tell! I would not have been allowed into work today if I were."
Expression indistinguishable, Dave stared at him for a moment before tapping furiously on his iPhone, clicking away at a one-way Pesterchum chat. Ivan waited patiently, hands folded over his lap, just as he always did. When Dave finished, Ivan beamed a smile at him, enthralled to read the latest spout of red text. He was never allowed to hold the phone, however, but he was content with leaning forward to see. He liked that color...so red and bold...
TG: i am not ill what kind of fucking lie is that
TG: look man you have got an illness that no medicine can fix
TG: its like johns mancrush on nic cage
TG: nothing can be done
TG: why are you my therapist
TG: i dont need one and youre more fucking batshit that i am
TG: and im not for the record
TG: how about that irony all up in this flighty psycho bullshit
"I've told you before, Dave, I don't understand your "irony," as you say."
TG: im done
"Excuse me?"
TG: this session is over
TG: terminated
TG: it is so done with that it should have been over thirty-one minutes and seventeen seconds ago
Ivan's smile curled as he settled back into his plush leather seat. "I'm afraid you still have twenty-something minutes left, Dave. You're not allowed to leave before hand."
Dave began typing, but this time Ivan interrupted him.
"Why? Are you done talking to me?"
The deep-set frown told Ivan all he needed to know, yet he found himself terribly disappointed by the lack of a tangible reaction.
"Very well. I will continue talking, then. There are a lot of things I would do to you if I could, Dave! All the sounds you would make, the faces! It's really a shame I'm your therapist, I can't actually do anything without losing my job! So, let's start with this begging fantasy I have of you."
Dave began counting down the time left, iPhone clutched in his hand and face in his knees. Eighteen minutes and forty-seven seconds, forty-six seconds, forty-five seconds, forty-four seconds...