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[fab_boy]

Sometimes I don't even feel like myself anymore. I feel like a commodity that everyone wants a piece of. I can't win. If I don't tour... the record label gets mad. I don't get Want Two and I don't get new fans and I don't get to travel

Comments

[howie_day]

For what it's worth, the fact that you're trying to 'walk the walk' is a huge, huge thing. I can't imagine what things are like but from where I stand, well, I think you're very brave, and feeling these things is just, well human. I'm hoping for both of you <3

[fab_boy]

Thank you, Howie. It's hard for both of us right now, and I guess we're both using this forum to blow off some steam. I see where he's coming from... why he feels the way he does, but I just get frustrated sometimes because I feel like I'm never doing anything as right as I should be.

Thank you for your good wishes :)

[stef_olsdal]

It's tough to keep your head above water out there huh?

And no, you shouldn't damn well shut up...vent it..spew forth for all you're worth...clean yer teeth and get back on the horse. Yes...fuck, if I say any more I'll be confusing myself too...*shuts up*

*giggles*

[fab_boy]

*giggle* Thanks, Stef.

I think that's what we're both doing... venting. I just hope we don't hurt each other too badly in the crossfire.

[m_nathanson]

You are the farthest thing from pathetic. I think you're pretty amazing for trying to be steady for someone like that. I just hope you remember to take care of yourself first.

[fab_boy]

He's working hard at getting himself better and I'm so proud of him for that. It's not an easy thing and I need to remember that because it wasn't so long ago that I went through it myself.

I do try to take care of myself, but I try to put us first if at all possible. It's all about balance and it's tricky.

Thank you, Matt.

[billy_tallent]

Trying to be everything to everyone is such a difficult task, and it's expected of you every time because it's your job. You're expected to just deal with this crushing weight of duty and love without cracking or complaining, and it's just not possible. No one can hold in so much pressure and feeling without letting some of it out or you'll end up in little pieces on the floor.

So complain if you need to, vent if you have to, cry, scream and rage until it's all out of your system. It doesn't make you any less of his rock to let off some steam. You both still love each other, you're still there for each other; it doesn't change because you need to talk about it every now and then.

[fab_boy]

Thank you, Callum.

I really have no idea what I'm doing. I feel so poorly equipped for everything. I need an instruction manual, or something.

[stephentrask]

i'm sorry.
it's not you i'm mad at, but the things i am angry at don't have a physical enough form for me toe scream at. i can't text message your success in the middle of the night and say hurtful things.

so you stuck in the crossfire. and i'm sorry.

i love you, and as scared and freaked and everything that's happening around me, the only thing that really scares me is losing you.