but I can't help the feeling, I could blow through the ceilingI don't know how I remain convinced that even though I can't get ahold of my life when I need to, I will somehow miraculously be able to when every possible incentive is gone ( Read more... )

I need help. I need to learn to ask for help before it's too late. It's worse every day.

I am scared at myself, for myself. Things are so bad. They only get worse. There's nothing.

Something that doesn't even exist can be this painful?
I've missed you since the day I met you.

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I can hardly say how excited I am. I haven't felt this way about a show in Reno in years. (Well it's not really a show, but that's when I usually get this feeling)

April 16th, JCSU at UNR

I haven't smoked shweed in three days and I already feel like I haven't in a really long time. If I can stop, it'll be the best thing I've ever done for myself. I know this. I miss myself. It's been three years. The future has been blocked, everything has been day-to-day or felt like the end. I have to laugh at myself--how could I possibly be ( Read more... )

virgo sun scorpio moon sagittarius rising
leo sun cancer moon libra rising
virgo/libra sun what's your moon was it really a joke when you called my emotions sexy?
virgo sun pisces moon can I be friends with your rising?

"WHO DECIDED.... I NEVER ASKED FOR THIS! I DON'T WANT THIS... SO WHO DECIDED? WHO MADE IT THIS WAY?"

I never did it for ( Read more... )

The Prisoner's Dilemma (Game theory/strategic interaction) gives insight on how to successfully mob. Sounds like the black bloc to me--an "incident," rather than a leader, sends a signal so that all can act at once with perfect or near-perfect immunity. 1958 ( Read more... )

Sometimes I just want to be like, fuck you everything! you suck!
So, just so I don't take it out on specific everythings that don't deserve it as much as the complete everything, I'm gonna use the internet.

fuck you everything! you suck!

I was looking at old photos from Ghana and the words that came into my mind were where am I now?
Where am I heading? I'm heading somewhere, that's the beauty of time and cause and effect, chaos and determinism. But where? If I keep putting off everything except this second right now eventually I'll end up with nothing else ( Read more... )