Long winded, but poignant

[faeadora]

I'm not sure why I am feeling like the way I am feeling is not justified, I'm sure somewhere in the back of my mind that this is normal - it has to be.

There is just something that feels really, really wrong about making funeral plans and saying goodbye to my Grandfather before he is actually gone. Last night, I went to to the hospital and stayed

Comments

[ilianna76]

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. *sends love*

[faeadora]

thank you *snugs*

[standp]

Hey there.
#1 - You have the right to feel ANYTHING you feel in this situation.
#2 - These are the hardest times we're given - facing death and loss. What I've learned from the deaths of my Mother, Father and Grandfather is that everyone will be greiving (before and after) their own way, in unexpected ways, and with very high and sometimes volatile passions. What I've tried to take away from these experiences was to do my best to allow all things to take their course, even if they seem inappropriate, rude, thoughtless, clueless, whatever. To be my most forgiving, or as Laura would say, to call upon my highest spirit. You already seem to be handling things very well and very wisely. I encourage you to be kind and forgiving to yourself and to others as you go through something none of us is really ever fully prepared to handle.

[faeadora]

thank you, this whole year and everything that has happened has been an exercise in living through my heart and IN my emotions instead of outside of them, so I think that it's just taking a little getting used to. My heart wasn't lived in for a long time and I never even noticed -- until one day when I did, and since then I have been adjusting to the overwhelming world around and inside of me. It is truly a gift to be able to feel things so profoundly, it just results in me not knowing what to do with myself sometimes. thank you for the continued words of support, you and Laura mean a lot to me.