I'm sorry you're going through this, and hope things get better for you. Keep your head up and remember that while your mother's issues hurt, you aren't responsible for them.
If you can swing it in any way, some sort of family counseling may help. Even if you just talk to someone to help devise a strategy to cope with your mom, it would be a good thing. If you can get your mom to go with you, even better.
You are a caring and giving person, that's one of the things that I like about you. It's hard to find a balance in there when you aren't getting back the care and respect you are giving to someone. I don't have any advise for you other than looking into counseling to help deal with the situation. What I can do is remind you that you are a good person and you have a lot of people who are pulling for you.
Keith and I will keep you in our prayers. Love you!
Thank you so much *hugs* I have thought about counseling many times. One of the problems that I run into with her is that she is highly manipulative and when she has gone to counseling herself, ends up manipulating the therapists.
I have thought about doing family counseling if I could get her to go because there are a lot of people on her side of the family that would need to join in to try to come to some sort of resolution or at least livable outcome.
The problem really is getting people to go and I don't know that she would. Never hurts to try, I know. So, we'll see. Thank you for the input!
Here's the thing about counseling. You can't *fix* your mom. Not unless she wants to be fixed, which I'm guessing is a no. So what you need is help in how to cope with her. Unless you are willing to completely cut her out of your life for good (which is a viable option and you are allowed to consider it) you are going to have deal with her.
If she is willing to go the counseling route, great! If she isn't willing, I would still suggest you go and talk to a therapist. The counselor or therapist won't be able to help her, but they will be able to help you to cope with her. If you can reduce the stress level she puts you in, it would be good for you.
And, as a possible benefit, it may encourage her to go get help, if only to keep up with you.
However you go, you still have lots of people on your side who are rooting for you!
Comments 3
I'm sorry you're going through this, and hope things get better for you. Keep your head up and remember that while your mother's issues hurt, you aren't responsible for them.
If you can swing it in any way, some sort of family counseling may help. Even if you just talk to someone to help devise a strategy to cope with your mom, it would be a good thing. If you can get your mom to go with you, even better.
You are a caring and giving person, that's one of the things that I like about you. It's hard to find a balance in there when you aren't getting back the care and respect you are giving to someone. I don't have any advise for you other than looking into counseling to help deal with the situation. What I can do is remind you that you are a good person and you have a lot of people who are pulling for you.
Keith and I will keep you in our prayers. Love you!
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I have thought about doing family counseling if I could get her to go because there are a lot of people on her side of the family that would need to join in to try to come to some sort of resolution or at least livable outcome.
The problem really is getting people to go and I don't know that she would. Never hurts to try, I know. So, we'll see. Thank you for the input!
I miss you guys!
Reply
Here's the thing about counseling. You can't *fix* your mom. Not unless she wants to be fixed, which I'm guessing is a no. So what you need is help in how to cope with her. Unless you are willing to completely cut her out of your life for good (which is a viable option and you are allowed to consider it) you are going to have deal with her.
If she is willing to go the counseling route, great! If she isn't willing, I would still suggest you go and talk to a therapist. The counselor or therapist won't be able to help her, but they will be able to help you to cope with her. If you can reduce the stress level she puts you in, it would be good for you.
And, as a possible benefit, it may encourage her to go get help, if only to keep up with you.
However you go, you still have lots of people on your side who are rooting for you!
Reply
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