My summer (fall) vacation, part II
The old man did not walk up the stairs, however. He spoke a word I did not recognize and could not repeat if I tried, and a door appeared as if by magic. It opened, revealing a warm cheery room lit by a merrily crackling fire. The door closed behind me, and I inadvertently jumped. The old man turned and looked at me, one brow raised in question.
“You would feel more comfortable if the door were open,” he stated matter-of-factly. He spoke the word again, followed by another short word that sounded more like a command. The door opened and remained that way.
He moved to a side table and poured two glasses of some steaming liquid, then carried them to a sitting area and placed them on a table between two chairs. I couldn’t help but notice that he glided when he walked. Young people I knew didn’t move with that much grace.
“Please, sit,” he said, motioning to a chair.
I hesitated, looking back at the open door for a moment. Yes, it was an escape, but where would I go? Perhaps he kept a boat on the island I could find, but I couldn’t sail it. With my luck, he probably had a personal helicopter he used to get on and off the island. I really was at his mercy. I turned back to him and found him still standing. He motioned to the chair with a clear view of the door, and I sat.
He sat in the chair adjacent to mine and then handed me one of the cups. The smell was enticing. It reminded me of spiced cider, though when I took a sip I knew it wasn’t that. It was better, though I had no idea what it was.
“Let us begin.”
I had almost forgotten he was there, so warm and comfortable was I feeling from the drink. I wondered if it was drugged. Oh well, it was a good way to go, if it was.
“Begin what?” I finally asked.
“Discussing why you are here, of course, and what we are to do with you,’ he laughed.
My heart forgot to beat for a moment.
“For one who claimed to have been the best representative we could send to such a meeting due to his long experience with mortals, you sure are frightening this one.”
I nearly dropped the cup. There was someone else present! A cloaked man stood in the door. I froze, unsure if I should respond that I wasn’t afraid or try to flee. The sad fact was that I was petrified. What were they to do with me? I have never feared what waited me after death, but I had feared the process of dying. What if it were gruesome, painful, torturous?
Musical laughter filled the room. The man at the door removed his cloak and hung it up, then turned to me with delight in his face.
“I guarantee that you are not about to die, much less die a painful, gruesome death at our hands. You are our guest, and we take hospitality very seriously,” he said kindly.
He walked to me, and my breath caught. He was beautiful. I don’t mean that he exuded sexual charm or charisma like our society thinks of it, I mean he was beautiful. He had long flowing hair that shone in the firelight, a face without wrinkle or care, eyes so warm and friendly you could lose yourself in them, and he moved with a grace that spoke of what humans would be, had we been perfect. He took my hand and I felt a tingling sensation run up my arm and then spread out through my whole body. My whole, old, decrepit body. I almost clapped a hand over my mouth, but it would have done no good. He had not answered a question I had asked, he had answered my thoughts. I couldn’t clap a hand over them to keep them hidden.
“Who are you? Where am I?” I finally managed to ask.
The two exchanged glances. The dark haired one pulled a chair up beside mine and sat down, though he did not release my hand. Warmth had spread through me, and I realized that the pains I was used to living with had dissipated.
“You are in Tirimbrithla,” said the first man.
That name struck a chord within me. I had heard it before, but I couldn’t immediately place it. I was pondering where I knew that name from when I felt the dark haired man rub the back of my hand. A vision popped into my mind.
“The Tower of Pearl!” I cried out. I nearly jerked my hand from the man’s grip, but he held on. His eyes laughed with joy at me. His dark hair was covering his ears and I longed to push it back, but I dared not touch him.
He grinned and reached his free hand up to push his hair behind his pointed ear.
I melted into my chair, pulling my hand toward me, but he wouldn’t release me.
I took a deep breath. “Elrond Peredhel?”
“At your service,” he replied.
I turned to the other man. “Olórin or Círdan,” I wondered aloud. “I guess Olórin.”
“You deduce correctly.”
I closed my eyes for a moment as I thought back to the wave we had sailed into. “We entered the Straight Road.”
“You did,” agreed Olórin, more seriously now. “An elven ship was entering at the same time, just to your north but out of your sight. Your ship was caught accidentally. We could not turn you back without harming them. The watcher set all of you into a deep sleep, then returned your shipmates to their repaired ship and set them back through the veil into your world. They will remember nothing of their time here.”
I wanted to clasp my hands together to keep them from shaking, but Elrond still held my hand and hadn’t let go. I felt much stronger with his touch.
“I am aiding you, but also indulging my desire to feel the rhythm and beat of mortal blood coursing beneath my touch,” admitted Elrond.
“Do not judge the state of the human race based on me,” I murmured. “Why did you keep me here?”
“The watcher sensed in your recent memories knowledge of us, particularly of Elrond. I was brought to assess what you knew, for while it has been rare for any mortal to stray upon the Straight Road, none who have in the past knew of this place. We cannot remove your memory of this place when there is already knowledge of it in your mind,” explained Olórin.
My mind was in turmoil. I had just discovered that Tolkien’s fiction was true, I was meeting two of my favorite historical, not fictional, figures of all time, I wanted to ask them a million question, but I also wanted to know my fate. They could not erase my memory, so they couldn’t send me back. Did that mean I could stay.. or I had to stay? And would I be here, all alone, or allowed to go with them on to Tol Eressea? I was trying to remember what I had read about the fate of those who reached these lands.
And who would feed my pets?
I heard laughter and looked up to see both of them looking very amused.
“Since you appear to be uncomfortable with us reading your thoughts, why do you not tell us what you are thinking,” suggested Elrond.
“Is there not some etiquette about reading minds?” I asked, a warm flush spreading up my face at my impertinence.
Elrond just laughed. “We would need to leave the room not to read your thoughts. You carry them so close to the surface of your mind that they are before us, whether we seek them or not.”
My face flushed hotter. “There are a million things I want to ask you, but I want to know first what the repercussions are of the questions I ask and any answers you give. If my fate is decided, I would know that now. If I am being judged, I wish to know against what criteria I am being evaluated. If there is a choice I must make, I wish to know the options.”
Elrond ginned, but Olorin frowned. “I hardly think you are in a position to dictate your demands to us,” he said sternly. He turned to Elrond. “Can mortals have changed that much since we last walked among them?”
“I am sure the world has changed greatly since then,” said Elrond diplomatically. He turned back to me. “You need not fear. The Valar are charged with the protection of Valinor, but the fate of mortals lies outside their responsibility. We are to discern what you know and if you pose any threat to our lands. Then the Valar will decide how to proceed, whether you are to stay or can be safely returned to your home.”
“How is it that we speak the same language?” I asked.
Olorin smiled. “We simply do. Do not question how this can be.” A curious look came over his face. “Now tell us what interest you have in these lands, and in particular, Elrond.”
“You are not aware of Professor Tolkien’s books?” I blurted out.
“Of course we are aware of his books,” answered Olórin sternly. “He wrote them as fiction. How is it that you know them to be true?”
“I did not, until just a few moments ago,” I answered. “I have become enthralled with the stories and have written fictional accounts of my own, filling in the gaps.” I blushed again. “Elrond was of special interest to me.”
“You created stories about me?” he asked in surprise.
“I did.” I wished the ground would swallow me whole right then. “You were a consistent character in all of the stories Tolkien wrote. I wrote stories about what your life might have been like, to make you into such an extraordinary person.”
A smile tugged at Elrond’s lips. “I am an extraordinary person in those tales?’
“Your role is understated, yet it is an important role nonetheless. In my eyes, you were extraordinary,” I replied lamely.
He covered my hand again and comfort flowed into me. Emboldened, I asked, “May I ask you a question?”
Elrond and Olorin exchanged glances, and I’m sure held a discussion not for my ears. “You may ask one question. I must hear it before I know if I will answer,” he answered gravely.
“Tolkien’s tales ended with all of the Ring-bearers sailing west. We want to believe that all of them found healing there. I have hoped that when you arrived, you found Celebrían healed and well too.”
“That is your question, then, about Celebrían?” asked Elrond bemusedly.
I nodded. He smiled. “Yes, she was healed and whole again. And Frodo found peace too, before he passed beyond the circles of the world.”
“And your sons, did they sail west too?”
“Ah, that is a second question,” replied Elrond. He paused while giving me a frown that froze my heart. Then a smile came over his face again. “Yes, my sons came, to my joy.”
I leaned back in my chair, absolutely content. The ancient elf and Maia had resumed some serious unspoken conversation. I didn’t mind that I was excluded. There was so much I wanted to ask, but somehow just seeing this Elrond, who was curious and merry and full of life made me so happy that all else faded from my mind.
I knew they were reading my thoughts, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t stop them and I really had little to hide. I am not a very interesting person, have little power and certainly posed no threat to them.
“Manwë must judge what is to be done with her,” said Olórin. “I do not believe she poses any threat to us.”
My heart jumped. Would I go before Manwë to explain myself and hear his judgment? I would be terrified, of course. But I would get to see Valinor!
“Mortals are not permitted in Valinor,” said Elrond gently.
“I know,” I answered. “I am not Tuor, or one of the companions of the Ring-bearer. I have no special reason to be there. In my world, though, I would be allowed to hear any accusations against me, defend myself and answer any questions, and hear my fate pronounced.”
Olórin laughed. “Are all humans now so suspicious? There are no accusations against you. You are simply somewhere you do not belong through no fault of your own, and we must determine the best way to rectify the situation.”
He rose. “We will return.”
A slight panic rose in me at the thought of being left alone on the island. And who was the Watcher? “When?”
“It will not be long,” promised Olórin. “The time will pass quickly.” He beckoned to Elrond to lead the way.
Elrond must have read my thoughts, for he stopped and rested a hand on my shoulder and peace flowed through me. “I will stay until you return,” he told Olórin.
Once again, some conversation flowed between the two, but even I could tell it was much more serious. They weren’t arguing, I don’t think, but they certainly were discussing intently. I kept my mouth shut. I wanted Elrond to stay! The island was dreary and though I don’t mind being alone normally, the thought of it here was a bit terrifying.
Finally, Olorin blew out a clearly exasperated breath and turned and walked out the door. We heard the door to the tower open and then close, and only then did I finally look at Elrond.
His eyes danced with laughter.
I had never imagined meeting Elrond, but if I had, I wouldn’t have pictured this. He was happy, joyful, even merry.
“Now,” he said suddenly, capturing my attention with the authority in his voice. I looked at him again. It was hard to meet his gaze for long. The laughter was there, but the command in his word was unmistakable. “I have some questions for you.”
He poured me another cup of that delicious hot drink, refilled his own cup and pulled his chair around a bit. And oh, he asked me questions. He asked me things about history and science and medicine. He wanted to know about space explorations and advances in technology in particular. He seemed to know many things already, but he wanted to know more. I am no dummy, but I wished I were an engineer and an astronaut and a research scientist so I could have answered all he wished to know. Several times when I was trying to remember something, he would take my hand and suddenly all my thoughts seemed clearer and crisper.
He asked me about the fascination with his people, and I told him about the movies that were made. I tried to hide the way he was portrayed as a manipulative father, but I think my disgust came through and he just laughed. He laughed a lot, actually. I told him Tolkien’s books were well read.
I had asked my one question, and I had certainly gathered I was not allowed to ask more, at least when Olórin was present. I was just contemplating whether I could ask Elrond a few more things, when I felt his hand tipping my face up to meet his gaze. Stern eyes met mine and he shook his head. Chagrined, I blushed and looked away.
I have no idea how long we talked. Elrond did let slip a few things in conversation. Perhaps he thought I wouldn’t notice. Perhaps he knew I would. The Elves are active in their quest for knowledge still. And his questions were very educated, about science and space and technology and even medicine.
“Now you must sleep,” he interrupted my thoughts.
I was tired. He stood and I did too, albeit much slower than him. I was very stiff and not looking forward to the climb up the stairs. I also didn’t want him to see my weakness. To my surprise, he patiently followed me up the stairs. I went to the room that I had slept in the night before and found the bed neatly made, the few things I had brought with me were stacked on a nearby table.
“A bath has been prepared for you,” said Elrond. “I will be downstairs, should you need anything.”
I wondered who had prepared the bath and made the beds, but I knew better than to ask. Elrond left and I took a hot bath. Then I dressed for bed and crawled between the covers. I wished I could take the sheets home with me, they were so soft.
I was nearly asleep when I sensed someone in the room. It was Elrond. He sat down beside the bed and took my hand in his. This was more like a clinical examination. Then he smiled and brushed his hand over my forehead and I fell fast asleep.
I awakened to the gentle rocking of the waves. I got out of bed and was pleasantly surprised to find I was not stiff and sore. I took a very quick shower, as each person is allowed only about three minutes of water and then dressed and went out on deck.
“Hey, she woke up finally!”
I waved off the captain, a gruff old guy with a cigar chronically chomped between his lips. I entered the main cabin, where meals were served, and found about half of my shipmates already eating. The sun was just rising so it was early.
“I guess we wore you out,” laughed our guide. “You must have slept for 24 hours straight.”
“I did?” I thought they were teasing me, but apparently not. I shrugged. “Well, it was worth it, then. I feel great.”
“We’ll be into port in about three hours. What time does your plane leave?”
“2 pm,” I answered as I fixed myself some breakfast.
I went back to my cabin to pack up my stuff. I couldn’t believe I had slept for so long. There was something not right. I picked up my laptop to put it in its bag, and realized it was warm. I opened it and found it turned on, but sleeping. I was usually more careful than that. I logged in so I could shut it down properly and found my story open.
As I began to read, memory flooded over me. There were a bunch of sentences at the bottom of the page, facts. Facts about Elrond and Valinor. I began to laugh. Elrond had done this. He had not let me ask any more questions, but he had told me quite a lot!
The last sentences brought tears to my eyes.
I was unable to cure the ailment within you. Given more time, perhaps I could have. It should not pain you for a period of time, at least.
It amuses me that mortals write stories about us. Obviously, you cannot know the truth, so I have provided you an outline to work from.
I enjoyed meeting you. Someday you will pass beyond the circles of the world and meet all who have gone before you. Greet those whom I love.
I made sure the words were saved, shut down the computer and packed it away.
Later that night, home and comfortably surrounded by purring cats, a happy dog and squawking birds, I unpacked my suitcase. I had not spoken to anyone of my experience. None of my shipmates had remembered anything, just as Olórin had said. And who would believe me if I told them Tolkien’s stories were true? No one. They would think I was teasing or they’d be sending me up to the state hospital for a long stay. I wondered if one day I would doubt the experience myself, think it only a dream.
The last item I pulled from my suitcase banished that fear. It was the cloak I had worn on the isle. I buried my face in it, and could smell the sea and that wonderful spiced drink.
So why am I telling all of you about this? Because you won’t believe it anyway. After all, its only fiction.