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[fairbrook]

at a starbucks on harbor street in costa mesa near newport...and i have piss and vinegar on the brain.....i am sour....tense.....kinda hung over.....and some goddamned jamaican fellow is telling me through the speakers above that i got to lively up myself

Comments

[handstil]

This sounds like a woman who desires space, and it might really put a wrench in things if she doesn't get it. I think that if she had said she didn't want to do much and then you showed up and she didn't feel like hanging out so she had to think of ways to busy herself on her "lazy day" so that she didn't have to seem rude to get her space...that puts her in an awkward position, and it probably really tensed her out.

I've been in a similar situation and it sounds like the very best thing to do is to back way up and let her make the call on hanging out again. Obviously not what you WANT to do, nor what seems fair to do, but I sense this is very volatile for you both and a bit of distance is the very best thing?

[fairbrook]

verygood advice......it is what i want to do..the last thing i want is for her to resent me because i am not giving her space..even if she is being an emotional brainfuck to me....even if i think i have given her plenty of space already.....i would rather her be happy, healthy and sane and well rested and me a little bit sad than me satisfied that she is spending enough time with me and her frizzlefrazzled.......

but i know it cannot go on like this forever, or even a long time...because i need my closeness, i need affection, i need to know i am wanted by her and i am not getting any of that..but i can be patient.....i just do not like feeling a fool...