Ai Telperion! Ai Laurelin! Your light divine, your fall unbearable.
The Aldudénië was written in Valinor, and concerns itself with the fall of the Two Trees that brought light to paradise. It is said to have been one of the most beautiful works ever written by any Elf. Sadly, as it is a Valinorean work, it has never been heard by any Mortal. I suggest that it may have gone something like this:
~*~*~*
Aldudenie ~ The Lament for the Two Trees
MANWË: My, this certainly is a joyous festival.
VARDA: Indeed. I'm a bitch.
ULMO: Yep.
INGWË: Hey, look, a huge shadow that no eyes can pierce. Why, that sure is odd.
FINGOLFIN: Yeah, that is strange.
FËANOR: I'm going to say something witty and assy at the same time.
VARDA: Assy? For a great linguist, you sure are illiterate.
FËANOR: Bitch.
MANDOS: Shut up.
TURGON: Ummm... what about that Shadow?
MANDOS: It's Doom Incarnate.
MANWË: Namo, you aren't supposed to talk without me telling you to.
MANDOS: But...
MANWË: Námo, I'm saddened. You should know better!
MANDOS: . . .
MANWË: Finally...
LÓRIEN: Well, let the festival commence!
GALADRIEL: Wait, what about the Shadow?
AULË: What Shadow?
GALADRIEL: The one that Námo said was Doom Incarnate.
AULË: I dunno what you're talking about.
FINARFIN: It's right there!
FINGOLFIN: It's on the Ezellohar!
YAVANNA: Hey, I know where that is!
VARDA: I should hope so.
TULKAS: It's probably just a rain cloud.
TURGON: Rain clouds don't resemble Doom Incarnate, though.
MANDOS: . . .
MANWË: Everyone shut up! This is a joyous occasion!
INGWË: Well, there went Laurelin.
THRONDOR: You know, maybe someone should do something.
ULMO: Like what?
VARDA: I dunno.
MANWË: Let's just calm down and have some fun...
FINROD: Okay, there went Telperion.
EVERYONE: . . .
VAIRË: It's so dark! Just like home!
MANDOS: . . .
FËANOR: You guys are so stupid.
VARDA: Yeah, well, you're an ass.
FËANOR: Maybe so, but at least I'm not an idiot.
OROMË: So. No light anymore.
TULKAS: Should we do something about this?
VARDA: No, no. We have to ask Manwë before we do anything, remember?
ULMO: Yeah. If we don't have permission, we're rebelling!
FËANOR: Ugh.
MANDOS: And so it is come to pass that the Light of Aman has passed Forever from the Circles of the World, and from this shall come untold pain and suffering. Shall this great Marring ever be amended? I fear that none can say, for the End of Arda is foretold by none save Eru, and my Dooms do not declare it.
MANWË: NÁMO!
MANDOS: Sorry!
~*~*~*
Aldudenie ~ The Lament for the Two Trees
MANWË: My, this certainly is a joyous festival.
VARDA: Indeed. I'm a bitch.
ULMO: Yep.
INGWË: Hey, look, a huge shadow that no eyes can pierce. Why, that sure is odd.
FINGOLFIN: Yeah, that is strange.
FËANOR: I'm going to say something witty and assy at the same time.
VARDA: Assy? For a great linguist, you sure are illiterate.
FËANOR: Bitch.
MANDOS: Shut up.
TURGON: Ummm... what about that Shadow?
MANDOS: It's Doom Incarnate.
MANWË: Namo, you aren't supposed to talk without me telling you to.
MANDOS: But...
MANWË: Námo, I'm saddened. You should know better!
MANDOS: . . .
MANWË: Finally...
LÓRIEN: Well, let the festival commence!
GALADRIEL: Wait, what about the Shadow?
AULË: What Shadow?
GALADRIEL: The one that Námo said was Doom Incarnate.
AULË: I dunno what you're talking about.
FINARFIN: It's right there!
FINGOLFIN: It's on the Ezellohar!
YAVANNA: Hey, I know where that is!
VARDA: I should hope so.
TULKAS: It's probably just a rain cloud.
TURGON: Rain clouds don't resemble Doom Incarnate, though.
MANDOS: . . .
MANWË: Everyone shut up! This is a joyous occasion!
INGWË: Well, there went Laurelin.
THRONDOR: You know, maybe someone should do something.
ULMO: Like what?
VARDA: I dunno.
MANWË: Let's just calm down and have some fun...
FINROD: Okay, there went Telperion.
EVERYONE: . . .
VAIRË: It's so dark! Just like home!
MANDOS: . . .
FËANOR: You guys are so stupid.
VARDA: Yeah, well, you're an ass.
FËANOR: Maybe so, but at least I'm not an idiot.
OROMË: So. No light anymore.
TULKAS: Should we do something about this?
VARDA: No, no. We have to ask Manwë before we do anything, remember?
ULMO: Yeah. If we don't have permission, we're rebelling!
FËANOR: Ugh.
MANDOS: And so it is come to pass that the Light of Aman has passed Forever from the Circles of the World, and from this shall come untold pain and suffering. Shall this great Marring ever be amended? I fear that none can say, for the End of Arda is foretold by none save Eru, and my Dooms do not declare it.
MANWË: NÁMO!
MANDOS: Sorry!