Its been a 'shotgun' 'wedding' kind of dance
I feel used. I'm talking the kind of used that just up and rips you asunder from what you learned. This is twice now this has happened. First from a guy who I thought loved me and only wanted someone to do everything for him. And now from a girl I thought loved me who bad mouths me behind my back. I honestly don't know what to say about this. I feel sick as hell. I just want to tear it all down. I want to make it quit hurting, because I let her go to help her. Yet now all she goes on about is her pain this, and her pain that, and that I'm to put it mildly a bad person. What the fuck?! What the fucking fuck?! I didn't want to let her go! I love her still! I faithfully defended her, and was as loving as I can be. She crowded me and didn't let me have any space. Yet when I asked for space I was suddenly the bad guy. Or when I tried to help her she told me off. I feel so damn sick. They say lessons without pain have no meaning. What the fuck did I learn from all of this? How is this fair?