secrets from the world
title: secrets from the world
pairing: jotwins (brotherly love, nothing serious)
rating: g
genre: angst
summary: an idol's life is constantly being put on display. In need of at least a little privacy, the twins harbor their own special secret together.
*****
the world knows they're brothers. the world knows youngmin is six minutes older and that kwangmin is obsessed with pikachu. the world knows their full names and where they were born and how tall they are. how much they weigh, what they like to eat. their lives are constantly broadcasted, like they're characters in a reality show that they never really signed up to be in. sure, it's cool when a fan hands kwangmin a pikachu toy because the moment he gets home he rushes into his shared room and carefully arranges it next to the rest of his other pikachu things. sure, youngmin loves it when people acknowledge the fact that he's older, but sometimes they both wish that they were mysteries to the world.
they're supposed to be okay with it; the video cameras in every corner of the dorm and the microphones always attached to their shirts. as idols it's in their job description, it's on the contract they've signed, to bear no secrets. one way or another, those secrets will be discovered. if the company finds out about something, they could lose their job. if the media finds out, they could lose their image. if another member finds out, they could lose a friend.
the twins do everything they're told. they sit still through makeup and hair, they practice diligently, go to vocal training, wake up on time (sometimes), eat the food that's given to them. they grin and bear it because it's what they asked for - after all, they came to the company, not the other way around. but the only thing they're not okay with is the fact that they can't be secretive about anything. can't leave the dorm, can't talk to certain people, can't even keep their phone numbers for more than a few months.
they're all just cracked eggs, open enough to see everything that's inside, but not quite open enough for everything to spill out and make a mess.
but they've managed to keep one secret, just one. between the two of them. boyfriend goes on a show one day, and the host asks youngmin if the twins are close. youngmin is about to say yes - they're rookies and it's the first time they've been asked that question - but something inside him tells him to say no.
"we're kind of awkward with each other," youngmin shrugs and kwangmin doesn't deny anything. after a few more interviews, they convince korea and the rest of the world, that when the twins are alone, they don't talk much. youngmin tells all the show hosts that they have a hard time conversing and kwangmin always plays along.
then their schedules are over for the day. they go home, eat dinner, wipe off the makeup and wash away the hairspray. the lights in the dorm turn off one by one, and everyone's sleeping except for the two. in the safety of the dark, they hold hands and curl up against each other in kwangmin's bed, just like they used to do at home. they share jokes that aren't funny, but for some reason they find the jokes hilarious and have to hold in their laughter. they whisper stories and kwangmin rambles on and on, occasionally being hushed by the older brother.
this is their special secret, one they're so careful with. when the media sleeps, they finally smile at one another like brothers do. when the cameras are off youngmin doesn't hesitate to rest his head on kwangmin's shoulder. when the microphones stop recording, kwangmin can whisper "i love you," and youngmin can whisper back, "i love you too."
pairing: jotwins (brotherly love, nothing serious)
rating: g
genre: angst
summary: an idol's life is constantly being put on display. In need of at least a little privacy, the twins harbor their own special secret together.
*****
the world knows they're brothers. the world knows youngmin is six minutes older and that kwangmin is obsessed with pikachu. the world knows their full names and where they were born and how tall they are. how much they weigh, what they like to eat. their lives are constantly broadcasted, like they're characters in a reality show that they never really signed up to be in. sure, it's cool when a fan hands kwangmin a pikachu toy because the moment he gets home he rushes into his shared room and carefully arranges it next to the rest of his other pikachu things. sure, youngmin loves it when people acknowledge the fact that he's older, but sometimes they both wish that they were mysteries to the world.
they're supposed to be okay with it; the video cameras in every corner of the dorm and the microphones always attached to their shirts. as idols it's in their job description, it's on the contract they've signed, to bear no secrets. one way or another, those secrets will be discovered. if the company finds out about something, they could lose their job. if the media finds out, they could lose their image. if another member finds out, they could lose a friend.
the twins do everything they're told. they sit still through makeup and hair, they practice diligently, go to vocal training, wake up on time (sometimes), eat the food that's given to them. they grin and bear it because it's what they asked for - after all, they came to the company, not the other way around. but the only thing they're not okay with is the fact that they can't be secretive about anything. can't leave the dorm, can't talk to certain people, can't even keep their phone numbers for more than a few months.
they're all just cracked eggs, open enough to see everything that's inside, but not quite open enough for everything to spill out and make a mess.
but they've managed to keep one secret, just one. between the two of them. boyfriend goes on a show one day, and the host asks youngmin if the twins are close. youngmin is about to say yes - they're rookies and it's the first time they've been asked that question - but something inside him tells him to say no.
"we're kind of awkward with each other," youngmin shrugs and kwangmin doesn't deny anything. after a few more interviews, they convince korea and the rest of the world, that when the twins are alone, they don't talk much. youngmin tells all the show hosts that they have a hard time conversing and kwangmin always plays along.
then their schedules are over for the day. they go home, eat dinner, wipe off the makeup and wash away the hairspray. the lights in the dorm turn off one by one, and everyone's sleeping except for the two. in the safety of the dark, they hold hands and curl up against each other in kwangmin's bed, just like they used to do at home. they share jokes that aren't funny, but for some reason they find the jokes hilarious and have to hold in their laughter. they whisper stories and kwangmin rambles on and on, occasionally being hushed by the older brother.
this is their special secret, one they're so careful with. when the media sleeps, they finally smile at one another like brothers do. when the cameras are off youngmin doesn't hesitate to rest his head on kwangmin's shoulder. when the microphones stop recording, kwangmin can whisper "i love you," and youngmin can whisper back, "i love you too."