When I first found out I was pregnant, my mind went blank for a good 20 minutes. I just sat there looking at this stick with this faint blue plus sign. My night went from getting a pack of beers and going sledding to making a decision that would change everything. I was in this almost daze for a few weeks, especially when I wasn't showing or ( Read more... )

I've gone my whole life wanting two things, the first is to figure out what it is that I am good at and build a life around it. The second to develop and maintain meaningful friendships and relationships. I finally figured out that I am extremely talented at alienating myself from people and letting countless friendships and relationships fail. I ( Read more... )

SO it has been a while since I posted in my blog. I just feel as if though this is a good outlet for me to vent some of my frustration. I am quite positive no one reads this thing anymore so it is even better. I have been feeling as if my anxiety is going to make me implode these last few weeks. The stress of everyday life  has been so hard for me ( Read more... )

Do you ever feel like your screaming at the top of your lungs and no one can hear you? Or worse there are people who hear you but they have no idea how to help you, and the ones that do, don't want too? Sometimes I feel like that.

I have been thinking a lot about what it really means to be successful. Ever since I was little it has always been instilled in me that in order to be successful you need to go to college, get a job, and make good money. Is that it? I feel like there is so much more to having a successful life than our society leads us to believe. I think each ( Read more... )

Life is about balance right? You have to work to have fun. You have to exersize to be healthy. Im confused. Where do you draw the line of selfishness? Like you have to care about yourself and the things you want to a certain extent, but when does it become too much? The same way works for selflessness, how do you know when to stop doing what others ( Read more... )

I just want to find where i belong. Somewhere I fit in. Someone who fits.

Have you ever felt like the society we live in is so submersed in technology that nothing real is actually tangible anymore. We are attached to our phones, our internet, our blackberry's like there is nothing outside of them. Social Interaction is losing is importance. Its nauseating to say the least. I think about that day in the City with Austin ( Read more... )

 My parents had to go run errands this morning and they left my nephew with me. I was exhausted because I didn't sleep very well last night so I made him come and lay in bed with me. He is now sleeping cuddled up next to Nemo with his binky and I can honestly say that I have never felt more in love in my life. He is seriously the sunshine in my ( Read more... )

So about two weeks ago I deleted my journal. I was reading through the entries and I felt like the person I was when I wrote most of them, and the person I have become are two very different people. Or maybe I just wanted them to be two different people. It's not an easy thing to do, to put type out your emotions and then post them on a website for ( Read more... )