Wondering
Title: Wondering
Author: burntotears
Fandom: Bandslash (Simple Plan)
Pairing: Pierre/David
Rating: R
Word Count: 2522
Disclaimer: I don't own people.
“Fuck you, Pierre!” David screamed as he stormed out of the practice room.
He heard footsteps follow him, but he chose to ignore them as he headed for the kitchen to get a bottle of water out of the fridge. He took a drink, recapped it, turned quickly and slammed it on the counter. Seb jumped at the action.
“David?” He questioned cautiously.
“Don’t fucking cover for him, Seb. He knows he’s a fucking ass and nothing you say is going to make what he does okay. I’m fucking sick of it, man. I’m tired of it.” David dropped down, back against the counter, and sighed. Seb joined him on the floor. With the arrangement of the kitchen, no one could really see them unless they came from one of the two sides, so it was a good place to talk and not be disturbed.
“David. You know he… he just gets worked up sometimes. You know he doesn’t mean it. He’s just so… into getting things perfect, ya know? So when it doesn’t go just right he gets antsy. He never really means the shit he says… he’s just running at the mouth. You know you shouldn’t let it bother you, man.” Seb looked at the top of David’s head.
He had his knees up, one arm draped over each knee, with his hands hooked on his water bottle in front of him. He was looking at the tile between his knees, studying the patterns and texture of the tile; he was doing anything but listen to Seb make excuses again.
“Seb, you say this every time. This isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last. It just pisses me off. No one else gets like that but him and then everyone makes excuses for him. I’m tired of the damn excuses. He’s just an ass. Can’t you guys let it be true that he is just a fucking ass hole when things don’t go his way? Why is that so hard for you guys?” David looked up at Seb to see his reaction.
“We aren’t making excuses… we are trying to explain it to you. Look David, we know he is harder on you than anyone else, but that’s because he’s closer to you and thinks you’re perfect. So when you aren’t, something’s gotta be wrong, right?” Seb questioned.
“Yeah. Something’s wrong alright. His fucking attitude is what’s wrong. I don’t care if I’m his fucking brother; he doesn’t have the right to talk down to me like that. I’m not a fucking child, Seb, and I won’t let him treat me like one. Especially if I’m supposed to be in a band with him for the next 20 years. No fucking way.” David got up and went outside. He sat on the curb for no particular reason, just listening to the cars and the wind and the animals. Hell anything was better than being in there with him.
Pierre was a mystery sometimes. He was probably the one who knew David the best; they were as close as it got. And David never felt ashamed to say that he looked up to Pierre like a fucking idol or something. He was always the more wise, mature, and self-assured one where as David was the small, simple, and slightly slow one.
Pierre always treated David differently than the rest of the guys, but that was because of their closeness. But lately, lately it was getting to where David didn’t even want to look at him, because if he looked at him the wrong way, he’d probably chew him out for something. David had never seen Pierre this snappy before and he certainly didn’t like it.
David knows that they are getting ready for touring, but fuck; Pierre didn’t have to be such an ass to him all the time.
David was stirred from his thoughts when he heard someone approaching behind him. He knew it was Pierre by the way his feet fell; he always had an unusual, lop sided stride that could be recognized anywhere.
Pierre sat down next to him, a little too close for David’s comfort, and sighed. He didn’t say anything though, so David just sat there wishing he couldn’t feel the heat from Pierre on his upper right arm.
Pierre shifted a little, apparently uncomfortable with the silence. Too fucking bad. I’m not saying anything, you ass hole.
“Man, look…” Pierre finally started and that set David off. He stood up without a word and walked across the lawn and sat on the tailgate of Patrick’s truck.
Pierre jumped up. “Fuck. David…” he started as he approached him and David turned his gaze to the approaching man, as cold and dark as he dared. Pierre stopped.
“What do you want me to say?” Pierre finally asked, defeated.
“Nothing.” And he got up and went back into the house.
---
Since I was a young man
I never was a fun man
I never had a plan and no security
Then ever since I met you
I never could forget you
I only wanna get you right here next to me
David hadn’t talked to Pierre for three days straight. He thought that it was a personal record, but pretended he wasn’t really keeping score.
The truth was, he was getting a little bored without Pierre. And a little annoyed that he couldn’t just walk up and talk to him, so instead he had to go to Seb or Chuck or Jeff. He loved the other guys, but they weren’t the same as Pierre.
And now he found that when Pierre tried to talk to him, he would be cold and distant out of habit and not actual hurt or anger. To be truthful, David had lost the anger that same day. It’s just a matter of his pride that remained now. And he put it totally on Pierre’s shoulders to figure out a way to crack him, because he wasn’t going to do it willingly.
Of course, that also had given Pierre three days alone as well to come up with a decent plan to get David to stop ignoring him. David hadn’t actually given it all that much thought until the moment actually came when he was sitting in the game room watching TV and Pierre walked in and had the other guys lock them inside. David thought about trying to escape, but decided it would take too much effort to get to the door so he just stayed in front of the TV instead.
Pierre sat on the couch to David’s right. David didn’t even look up. After the show he was watching rolled credits, David turned off the TV and sat there, waiting for Pierre to get his speech over with.
“Fuck you, David.”
David turned to Pierre and gawked. “What?” David couldn’t believe his ears. He was, after all, the one who was hurt and why the hell was Pierre saying that to him when it should be the other way around.
“You heard me,” Pierre said, crossing his arms over his chest. He smirked a little and David realized that he had reacted just as Pierre had expected.
Typical of him to get cornered like this. Typical of him to fall into Pierre’s traps so easily.
“Man, whatever,” David started to stand, but sat back down when Pierre firmly said, "Sit the fuck down."
David sighed, defeated. “Just get it over with, Pierre. I’m sick of this shit.”
“Oh you’re sick of this shit? You are sick of this shit?” Pierre said again and stood up, looming over David and starting to scare the living hell out of him.
“Umm…” Is all David could get out. Pierre was leaning down in his face and David wouldn’t deny it, he was scared shitless.
“You don’t have shit to be sick of. I’m sorry David. I’m sorry I fucking went off on you but that doesn’t give you the fucking right to ignore me for three fucking days for something as petty as that. That’s fucked up, David, and you know it.” Pierre sat on the coffee table, giving David a little more air.
“What shit are you trying to pull?” David started to get a little angry now. Pierre was the one in the wrong, not him, and he wasn’t about to let Pierre manipulate his way out of it like this. Not in this fucking life. “You are the one that fucked up, man. You are the one that’s been drilling me for the past two weeks like everything I do is not good enough for your fucking standards. Fuck that, Pierre. Fuck that. I’m not a child and you aren’t my fucking father who can tell me what to do and how to be. I don’t know what your problem is, but you are the one that is in the wrong and you are the one who has the problem, not me. Don’t you dare try to fucking turn this shit on me.”
“Alright. Alright! I’m sorry, David. Shut the fuck up for a second, okay?” David sat back down after his anger boiled him up and off the couch and into Pierre’s face just moments before.
Now my life is changing
It's always rearranging
It's always getting stranger than I thought it ever could
Ever since I found you
I wanna be around you
I wanna get down to the point that I need you
“Look. You’re right. It is my problem. I have a problem and I don’t know how to fix it, so instead of trying to talk to you about it, I just ratted on you instead to try and make it go away. Well it won’t fucking go away, David. I’ve tried. I can’t get it out of my head. Believe me; I’ve tried more than my share of times. Fuck this is hard.” Pierre put his head in his hands and sighed, shaking.
David melted. He knew Pierre had a problem, but he didn’t know it was something serious. If he had known, he certainly wouldn’t have messed with him these passed three days like he had. Fuck, David, expect you to fuck things up as usual.
He moved next to Pierre on the coffee table and draped his arm around his friend’s shoulders. “Fuck. I’m sorry, Pierre. I didn’t know it was something serious. I’m stupid, I was being an ass. I’m sorry, man.” David touched his other hand to Pierre hands that cupped his face, and Pierre finally looked up, eyes brimming with tears.
“Shit, Pierre, what is it?” David was getting worried now.
“I… I… I told the other guys and they were okay with it… and they said I should go ahead and tell you, but… it was just too hard. It’s too hard. I don’t know how to say it to you… I don’t want you to think I’m…” he stopped. David stared.
Fuck. This must be big. “Dammit, Pierre, just tell me. I’m your best friend, it’s not like I’m going to hate you or anything. Just say it.”
“I… I’m scared of what you’ll think.” David had never seen Pierre make himself so vulnerable and it scared the shit out of him. Pierre was always the strong one; always the one to keep David up when he was down. It was never the other way around. It was never like this.
“It’s okay, Pierre. Just tell me. Whatever it is… just tell me. I promise I won’t get mad. I promise.” David squeezed his shoulder for emphasis.
“I… I’m… I’m gay.” Pierre finally said and heaved a sigh.
David went cold for a second, but only a second. The shock wore off quickly and he pulled his friend into a hug.
“Fuck, Pierre. You thought I’d get mad at you for that? Come on man, it’ll take more than that to get rid of me…”
“There’s more. That’s not all,” Pierre said, pulling out of the embrace. His eyes were tearing again and now David was scared. What now?
“Well, what is it?” David pressed, not entirely sure he wanted to know.
“The reason… the reason I’ve been so hard on you lately… is because… I… I think I like you, David. You know, as more than just a ‘best friend.’” Pierre looked away from him.
David was in shock now. Total shock. Pierre likes him? More than a friend? Pierre is gay? What?
“Just give me a minute, okay?” David said, getting up and pacing the room behind the couch he was sitting on earlier.
“You don’t have to try and be nice about it, David. It’s okay. I’m sure I’ll get over it. You can go ahead and tell me that there’s no hope and I’ll move on. I didn’t want to complicate your life; I tried to stop it… I swear I tried, David. Please don’t hate me.” Pierre was crying now and David didn’t want to see it.
“I don’t hate you, Pierre. I could never hate you, you stupid fuck,” David laughed shortly, not really liking his own words. “Sorry. Look, I don’t hate you, okay? It’s just… new. I mean, I never really thought about you that way, I guess. I don’t know, it’s just… different, is all.”
“So you don’t care?” Pierre perked up, hopeful.
“Of course not. I mean, like I said, it’s different, but I don’t know… it could be something, ya know? Doesn’t hurt to try, does it? Fuck, this is odd. I’m just so used to you supporting me and now here I am trying to do the same thing for you. I’m not very good at this…” David looked away, finding the carpet very interesting at the moment.
Pierre got up and stood in front of David. “You are doing just fine. You’ve helped me a lot, just now, believe it or not.” Pierre met David’s gaze.
David saw something different in his gaze… something softer, calmer. He also never noticed how beautiful Pierre’s eyes were before.
He thought ‘What the hell? Might as well try it’ and closed the distance between their lips before he could change his mind. Pierre responded quickly and wrapped his arms around David’s neck and David found his arms automatically go around Pierre’s waist.
They kissed for only a moment, and David pulled back. “Well that’s… different.”
“How different?” Pierre asked.
“Not bad, just… different.”
Pierre pulled him into a hug, just like before. “You don’t have to respond right away, you know. I’ll wait for you. Just figure it out at your own pace, okay? It’s up to you, any way.” And suddenly David found that Pierre was being the strong one again and he felt more comfortable.
Pierre always was the stronger one. With his help, maybe David could learn to like him. It wouldn’t be very difficult, he thinks.
If you want me to wait
I would wait for you
If you tell me to stay
I would stay right through
If you don't wanna say
Anything at all
I'm happy wondering
-fin-
Author: burntotears
Fandom: Bandslash (Simple Plan)
Pairing: Pierre/David
Rating: R
Word Count: 2522
Disclaimer: I don't own people.
“Fuck you, Pierre!” David screamed as he stormed out of the practice room.
He heard footsteps follow him, but he chose to ignore them as he headed for the kitchen to get a bottle of water out of the fridge. He took a drink, recapped it, turned quickly and slammed it on the counter. Seb jumped at the action.
“David?” He questioned cautiously.
“Don’t fucking cover for him, Seb. He knows he’s a fucking ass and nothing you say is going to make what he does okay. I’m fucking sick of it, man. I’m tired of it.” David dropped down, back against the counter, and sighed. Seb joined him on the floor. With the arrangement of the kitchen, no one could really see them unless they came from one of the two sides, so it was a good place to talk and not be disturbed.
“David. You know he… he just gets worked up sometimes. You know he doesn’t mean it. He’s just so… into getting things perfect, ya know? So when it doesn’t go just right he gets antsy. He never really means the shit he says… he’s just running at the mouth. You know you shouldn’t let it bother you, man.” Seb looked at the top of David’s head.
He had his knees up, one arm draped over each knee, with his hands hooked on his water bottle in front of him. He was looking at the tile between his knees, studying the patterns and texture of the tile; he was doing anything but listen to Seb make excuses again.
“Seb, you say this every time. This isn’t the first time and it won’t be the last. It just pisses me off. No one else gets like that but him and then everyone makes excuses for him. I’m tired of the damn excuses. He’s just an ass. Can’t you guys let it be true that he is just a fucking ass hole when things don’t go his way? Why is that so hard for you guys?” David looked up at Seb to see his reaction.
“We aren’t making excuses… we are trying to explain it to you. Look David, we know he is harder on you than anyone else, but that’s because he’s closer to you and thinks you’re perfect. So when you aren’t, something’s gotta be wrong, right?” Seb questioned.
“Yeah. Something’s wrong alright. His fucking attitude is what’s wrong. I don’t care if I’m his fucking brother; he doesn’t have the right to talk down to me like that. I’m not a fucking child, Seb, and I won’t let him treat me like one. Especially if I’m supposed to be in a band with him for the next 20 years. No fucking way.” David got up and went outside. He sat on the curb for no particular reason, just listening to the cars and the wind and the animals. Hell anything was better than being in there with him.
Pierre was a mystery sometimes. He was probably the one who knew David the best; they were as close as it got. And David never felt ashamed to say that he looked up to Pierre like a fucking idol or something. He was always the more wise, mature, and self-assured one where as David was the small, simple, and slightly slow one.
Pierre always treated David differently than the rest of the guys, but that was because of their closeness. But lately, lately it was getting to where David didn’t even want to look at him, because if he looked at him the wrong way, he’d probably chew him out for something. David had never seen Pierre this snappy before and he certainly didn’t like it.
David knows that they are getting ready for touring, but fuck; Pierre didn’t have to be such an ass to him all the time.
David was stirred from his thoughts when he heard someone approaching behind him. He knew it was Pierre by the way his feet fell; he always had an unusual, lop sided stride that could be recognized anywhere.
Pierre sat down next to him, a little too close for David’s comfort, and sighed. He didn’t say anything though, so David just sat there wishing he couldn’t feel the heat from Pierre on his upper right arm.
Pierre shifted a little, apparently uncomfortable with the silence. Too fucking bad. I’m not saying anything, you ass hole.
“Man, look…” Pierre finally started and that set David off. He stood up without a word and walked across the lawn and sat on the tailgate of Patrick’s truck.
Pierre jumped up. “Fuck. David…” he started as he approached him and David turned his gaze to the approaching man, as cold and dark as he dared. Pierre stopped.
“What do you want me to say?” Pierre finally asked, defeated.
“Nothing.” And he got up and went back into the house.
---
Since I was a young man
I never was a fun man
I never had a plan and no security
Then ever since I met you
I never could forget you
I only wanna get you right here next to me
David hadn’t talked to Pierre for three days straight. He thought that it was a personal record, but pretended he wasn’t really keeping score.
The truth was, he was getting a little bored without Pierre. And a little annoyed that he couldn’t just walk up and talk to him, so instead he had to go to Seb or Chuck or Jeff. He loved the other guys, but they weren’t the same as Pierre.
And now he found that when Pierre tried to talk to him, he would be cold and distant out of habit and not actual hurt or anger. To be truthful, David had lost the anger that same day. It’s just a matter of his pride that remained now. And he put it totally on Pierre’s shoulders to figure out a way to crack him, because he wasn’t going to do it willingly.
Of course, that also had given Pierre three days alone as well to come up with a decent plan to get David to stop ignoring him. David hadn’t actually given it all that much thought until the moment actually came when he was sitting in the game room watching TV and Pierre walked in and had the other guys lock them inside. David thought about trying to escape, but decided it would take too much effort to get to the door so he just stayed in front of the TV instead.
Pierre sat on the couch to David’s right. David didn’t even look up. After the show he was watching rolled credits, David turned off the TV and sat there, waiting for Pierre to get his speech over with.
“Fuck you, David.”
David turned to Pierre and gawked. “What?” David couldn’t believe his ears. He was, after all, the one who was hurt and why the hell was Pierre saying that to him when it should be the other way around.
“You heard me,” Pierre said, crossing his arms over his chest. He smirked a little and David realized that he had reacted just as Pierre had expected.
Typical of him to get cornered like this. Typical of him to fall into Pierre’s traps so easily.
“Man, whatever,” David started to stand, but sat back down when Pierre firmly said, "Sit the fuck down."
David sighed, defeated. “Just get it over with, Pierre. I’m sick of this shit.”
“Oh you’re sick of this shit? You are sick of this shit?” Pierre said again and stood up, looming over David and starting to scare the living hell out of him.
“Umm…” Is all David could get out. Pierre was leaning down in his face and David wouldn’t deny it, he was scared shitless.
“You don’t have shit to be sick of. I’m sorry David. I’m sorry I fucking went off on you but that doesn’t give you the fucking right to ignore me for three fucking days for something as petty as that. That’s fucked up, David, and you know it.” Pierre sat on the coffee table, giving David a little more air.
“What shit are you trying to pull?” David started to get a little angry now. Pierre was the one in the wrong, not him, and he wasn’t about to let Pierre manipulate his way out of it like this. Not in this fucking life. “You are the one that fucked up, man. You are the one that’s been drilling me for the past two weeks like everything I do is not good enough for your fucking standards. Fuck that, Pierre. Fuck that. I’m not a child and you aren’t my fucking father who can tell me what to do and how to be. I don’t know what your problem is, but you are the one that is in the wrong and you are the one who has the problem, not me. Don’t you dare try to fucking turn this shit on me.”
“Alright. Alright! I’m sorry, David. Shut the fuck up for a second, okay?” David sat back down after his anger boiled him up and off the couch and into Pierre’s face just moments before.
Now my life is changing
It's always rearranging
It's always getting stranger than I thought it ever could
Ever since I found you
I wanna be around you
I wanna get down to the point that I need you
“Look. You’re right. It is my problem. I have a problem and I don’t know how to fix it, so instead of trying to talk to you about it, I just ratted on you instead to try and make it go away. Well it won’t fucking go away, David. I’ve tried. I can’t get it out of my head. Believe me; I’ve tried more than my share of times. Fuck this is hard.” Pierre put his head in his hands and sighed, shaking.
David melted. He knew Pierre had a problem, but he didn’t know it was something serious. If he had known, he certainly wouldn’t have messed with him these passed three days like he had. Fuck, David, expect you to fuck things up as usual.
He moved next to Pierre on the coffee table and draped his arm around his friend’s shoulders. “Fuck. I’m sorry, Pierre. I didn’t know it was something serious. I’m stupid, I was being an ass. I’m sorry, man.” David touched his other hand to Pierre hands that cupped his face, and Pierre finally looked up, eyes brimming with tears.
“Shit, Pierre, what is it?” David was getting worried now.
“I… I… I told the other guys and they were okay with it… and they said I should go ahead and tell you, but… it was just too hard. It’s too hard. I don’t know how to say it to you… I don’t want you to think I’m…” he stopped. David stared.
Fuck. This must be big. “Dammit, Pierre, just tell me. I’m your best friend, it’s not like I’m going to hate you or anything. Just say it.”
“I… I’m scared of what you’ll think.” David had never seen Pierre make himself so vulnerable and it scared the shit out of him. Pierre was always the strong one; always the one to keep David up when he was down. It was never the other way around. It was never like this.
“It’s okay, Pierre. Just tell me. Whatever it is… just tell me. I promise I won’t get mad. I promise.” David squeezed his shoulder for emphasis.
“I… I’m… I’m gay.” Pierre finally said and heaved a sigh.
David went cold for a second, but only a second. The shock wore off quickly and he pulled his friend into a hug.
“Fuck, Pierre. You thought I’d get mad at you for that? Come on man, it’ll take more than that to get rid of me…”
“There’s more. That’s not all,” Pierre said, pulling out of the embrace. His eyes were tearing again and now David was scared. What now?
“Well, what is it?” David pressed, not entirely sure he wanted to know.
“The reason… the reason I’ve been so hard on you lately… is because… I… I think I like you, David. You know, as more than just a ‘best friend.’” Pierre looked away from him.
David was in shock now. Total shock. Pierre likes him? More than a friend? Pierre is gay? What?
“Just give me a minute, okay?” David said, getting up and pacing the room behind the couch he was sitting on earlier.
“You don’t have to try and be nice about it, David. It’s okay. I’m sure I’ll get over it. You can go ahead and tell me that there’s no hope and I’ll move on. I didn’t want to complicate your life; I tried to stop it… I swear I tried, David. Please don’t hate me.” Pierre was crying now and David didn’t want to see it.
“I don’t hate you, Pierre. I could never hate you, you stupid fuck,” David laughed shortly, not really liking his own words. “Sorry. Look, I don’t hate you, okay? It’s just… new. I mean, I never really thought about you that way, I guess. I don’t know, it’s just… different, is all.”
“So you don’t care?” Pierre perked up, hopeful.
“Of course not. I mean, like I said, it’s different, but I don’t know… it could be something, ya know? Doesn’t hurt to try, does it? Fuck, this is odd. I’m just so used to you supporting me and now here I am trying to do the same thing for you. I’m not very good at this…” David looked away, finding the carpet very interesting at the moment.
Pierre got up and stood in front of David. “You are doing just fine. You’ve helped me a lot, just now, believe it or not.” Pierre met David’s gaze.
David saw something different in his gaze… something softer, calmer. He also never noticed how beautiful Pierre’s eyes were before.
He thought ‘What the hell? Might as well try it’ and closed the distance between their lips before he could change his mind. Pierre responded quickly and wrapped his arms around David’s neck and David found his arms automatically go around Pierre’s waist.
They kissed for only a moment, and David pulled back. “Well that’s… different.”
“How different?” Pierre asked.
“Not bad, just… different.”
Pierre pulled him into a hug, just like before. “You don’t have to respond right away, you know. I’ll wait for you. Just figure it out at your own pace, okay? It’s up to you, any way.” And suddenly David found that Pierre was being the strong one again and he felt more comfortable.
Pierre always was the stronger one. With his help, maybe David could learn to like him. It wouldn’t be very difficult, he thinks.
If you want me to wait
I would wait for you
If you tell me to stay
I would stay right through
If you don't wanna say
Anything at all
I'm happy wondering
-fin-