Home Ec is Outrageous!; Monday, Period Five [ 05/17 ].
"Good afternoon, my eager home ec'ers!" Aquaman greeted the class with his usual gusto and smile, standing amid a home ec classroom that looked like a fabric store had imbibed about five hundred drinks too many and ralphed all over the place. "I hope your weekends were good ones, productive and life-fulfilling! And I hope your Mondays have also gotten you prepared for another fun and exiting week in the adventure that is summer camp! But enough of that! Let us march onward to our next exciting chapter in this book of the economics of the home!"
With that, Aquaman reached back, a dramatic pose like one about to pull forth a sword to cause great damage to evil doers everywhere, and then brandished...
...a sewing needle.
With a little bit of orange thread still dangling loose from the eye.
"Darning! Sewing! Mending! Our clothing is what keeps us warm, it's got our backs covered, it can be a distinguishing feature and it keeps us from indecently exposing ourselves to both the elements and our fellow compatriates, although, admittedly," he put a hand to his mouth as if divulging in a secretive whisper, although his tone didn't really drop much, "some of us more than others. So we need to know how to take care of them. One way to do so is...well, to sew! Fix up all those little holes and tears before they become big holes and tears! Allow me to demonstrate!"
Which he did, whipping out a large orange shirt that appeared to have gills on it, and narrating as he showed the class the basics of how to sew, not only holes in your clothing, but also a button.
"Now, give it a try! As you can see, we have many clothes in need of mending!" It seemed beyond Aquaman to think that some of these clothes had been ripped and ruined for a reason. "There exists among them a varying degree of distress, so pick one you feel comfortable with and darn those darn clothes!"
"If you feel that mere hemming, stitching, sewing and buttoning is a little basic for your own personal skills, I also have available some different material and detailing accessories, and you may spend some time trying to sew your own superhero costume! Remember to keep in mind your color choices from last week! And you want it to be bold and adventurous, just like you!"
"So have at it! Really sew this clothing who's boss!"
Yes, he thought that was funny. Shhh.
[[ please wait for the slowly approaching OCD has arrived! ]]
[[ Class Syllabus and Roster ]] [[ Previous Classes ]]
With that, Aquaman reached back, a dramatic pose like one about to pull forth a sword to cause great damage to evil doers everywhere, and then brandished...
...a sewing needle.
With a little bit of orange thread still dangling loose from the eye.
"Darning! Sewing! Mending! Our clothing is what keeps us warm, it's got our backs covered, it can be a distinguishing feature and it keeps us from indecently exposing ourselves to both the elements and our fellow compatriates, although, admittedly," he put a hand to his mouth as if divulging in a secretive whisper, although his tone didn't really drop much, "some of us more than others. So we need to know how to take care of them. One way to do so is...well, to sew! Fix up all those little holes and tears before they become big holes and tears! Allow me to demonstrate!"
Which he did, whipping out a large orange shirt that appeared to have gills on it, and narrating as he showed the class the basics of how to sew, not only holes in your clothing, but also a button.
"Now, give it a try! As you can see, we have many clothes in need of mending!" It seemed beyond Aquaman to think that some of these clothes had been ripped and ruined for a reason. "There exists among them a varying degree of distress, so pick one you feel comfortable with and darn those darn clothes!"
"If you feel that mere hemming, stitching, sewing and buttoning is a little basic for your own personal skills, I also have available some different material and detailing accessories, and you may spend some time trying to sew your own superhero costume! Remember to keep in mind your color choices from last week! And you want it to be bold and adventurous, just like you!"
"So have at it! Really sew this clothing who's boss!"
Yes, he thought that was funny. Shhh.
[[ please wait for the slowly approaching OCD has arrived! ]]
[[ Class Syllabus and Roster ]] [[ Previous Classes ]]